"Ouch." I flinched back from the warm wet towel that was prodding at my lip. Donna just rolled her eyes, there was a permanent scowl affixed to her face. Allegedly, I was being a bit of a baby about getting patched up. "Well it hurts." Wow. That sounded pathetic. Okay, maybe I was being a lot of a baby. Too bad my 'give a crap' meter was broken, along with every other bone in my face. Everything else in my body bitched and moaned too, apparently explosions weren't that good for people, neither was getting landed on by heavy-set men. But right now, my problem was my lip, and Donna, aggressively, trying to clean out the ashy film that had wormed its way into my open wounds.

"I gathered." Donna's patience was coming to an end. Actually, she was probably way past the end at this point. Probably two exits and a fifty dollar cab ride past it. There was a voice in my head that admitted she was being infinitely more nice to me than I deserved. Bleh. Bleh on you voice. Being a grown-up was for losers. I was going to keep on whining.

Well, in my head I was. I should probably cut back on verbalizing it if I didn't want Donna to try and feed me that towel.

She dropped it back in the bowl of warm water and looked over her shoulder. "How are you holding up, Jack?"

Jack hadn't mumbled a peep since we had laid him out on the cot. In my defense, no one was poking at him. Although, my clothing hadn't started to melt into my skin, so I guess that made us not even at all on the pain scale. Getting it back off of him had been a pretty stressful experience. Did you know skin makes a noise when it peels away? I didn't. It was sort of similar to ripping off a band-aid. Except it was infinitely more horrifying because it wasn't a sticker we were pulling off of him, it was layers of skin. And then don't forget to add Jack's strained noises of agony. That will be a nice preview of the nightmares I'd be having for the next week. Or possibly for the rest of my life.

"I'm fine." Jack repeated his mantra. Which was insane, because what he had just gone through would have rendered me sobbing and screaming for my mommy. He must be speaking French, because those words could not mean the same thing I thought they meant. Donna wasn't interested in taking his word for it.

"Sure. I'm sure you are." She said in a tone that screamed 'bullshit, you liar'. Good for her. She had been over to check on him several times, just like now. If anyone on this ship was an adult, it would have to be Donna Noble. She lifted the white sheet we had draped over Jack, revealing the much improved, if a little tender looking, pink skin beneath. Jack had insisted several times that he didn't mind going without the sheet, still a bit of a whore, even in excruciating pain. What a trooper. I was actually immensely relieved they had covered him up, because I had been unable to look away from the open blisters and oozing raw skin that made up his burns. Trying to remind myself not to think about that was about as useful to me as the annoying voices in my head. Which is to say, not very.

"Uh…Donna?" Jack raised his eyebrow when he noticed she was still standing there, just staring at his chest. I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, but the way she was gazing didn't really look very medical in nature.

"Hm?"

"Enjoying the view?" Jack's mouth curled into a smug grin and Donna shook her head, looking up as though she had just realized he was still awake.

"What?" She snorted, letting the sheet flutter back across Jack's torso. "Don't be silly. Just making sure you aren't growing your skin back, you know, green or something." She turned back around so Jack couldn't see her and pulled a guilty face at me. Totally busted. I started to laugh, but that scrunched my face painfully, so it morphed into more of an unhappy groan.

"Hey, anytime you want to throw some action my way, I'm all yours." He winked.

"In your dreams fly boy." Donna rolled her eyes as she grabbed the back of my chair and wheeled me over to a rather dumpy looking floor lamp. I gave it a good long glare, just so it knew I wouldn't be putting up with any of its 'falling on my head' bullshit. Not on my watch. Once I was centered beneath it, Donna reached over my head and flipped it on-

Jesus mother fu-

It was bright. White hot light of a million billion suns.

Okay, not quite, but close. It was much closer to an industrial factory bulb than it was to any of the 60 watts I had back home. My eyes had seared themselves shut about half a second before I had even thought about closing them. It was an intense god damn light.

"It feels funny." It was tingly, and surprisingly, not warm. It sort of felt like when my arm fell asleep, except all over, and there was no painful buzz of the blood flow surging back into my limbs. Yet. Oh hell, I was going to be so pissed if that happened.

"That means it's working." Donna said off to my left. It wasn't impossible to open my eyes, but I had the feeling I wouldn't have been able to see anything even if I bothered. "Now hush and sit there for a bit. I'm going to see what the Doctor is up to. Promised you a nice bloody vacation and that's exactly what we're going to get. Had it up to here with these adventures always ending up with most of us half-dead." She muttered to herself.

"Preach it sister." The sentiment was one I was familiar with. "But no shopping."

"Don't get smart with me miss, or you'll find yourself at the biggest museum in the universe. Just you and the Doctor."

Uh oh. Do not anger the grown-up. She will always get even.

"I'm sure whatever you decide will be lovely." I made an effort to smile, even though it probably came across as a grimace. Donna humphed in a 'that's what I thought' kind of way and her footsteps retreated from the room. Hopefully she had been appeased. Or maybe there was going to be a really long lecture about the Aztec's of Jupiter in my very near future. That's something I could worry about later. For now, I would enjoy my lamp, every ache and pain seemed dulled beneath it, like bathing in bright sunshine, without feeling like my skin was about to light on fire. The cuts and bruises on my face were tingling with high-grade super space light and it was already starting to feel substantially less like I had slammed my face into a wall.

Hurrah.

Jack coughed dryly, a reminder that I wasn't actually alone in the room, even if I couldn't see anyone else. Unfortunately, that reminder just made me feel like a weirdo for not saying anything.

Dammit.

"So…" You could just let it be quiet, well, except you've broken the silence. So now you have to at least finish your thought. Wait, what the hell was I going to say? God dammit. I am really ill prepared for this. "What are you doing way out here?" Small talk was the bane of my existence. Well, the second bane, right after 'long uncomfortable silences'.

"You know, just living the life. Defending the Earth. The usual." He didn't really sound like he was in the mood for small talk, but he also hadn't been dismissive enough for me to sit there contentedly in silence. Whatever happened to the good ole days when we were baboons and communicated in grunts and occasional grooming sessions? Why couldn't that be me?

Who was I kidding, I would have been the awkward ape that groomed at all the wrong times.

"You're uh…not on Earth. You're actually way out-" It occurred to me that I had no idea where the great 'super mall in the sky' was. Something I should have considered before speaking. "Er. Well, I'm pretty sure we're not anywhere near Earth." Someone would have mentioned the giant mall in space.

"True, but defending usually involves stopping the problem before it gets to Earth." He grunted. Alright, that sounded practical. I was still holding out hope that my 'giant brick wall around the planet' idea was going to get picked up, but I guess there were other options in the meantime.

"That makes sense." I nodded. "So why are you out on your own trying to get blown up? Isn't there supposed to be back-up in these kind of missions?" We had met a whole team of people back in Cardiff. Granted, I couldn't remember any of their names, or faces, or really anything other than they had hair. I think.

"No back up." Even without opening my eyes, I could hear the casual grin melting off his face. "Not anymore."

Well, that wasn't ominous at all. It should have been a helpful social cue for anyone, other than me, to shut my mouth and endure the silence.

But it was sooo awkward.

"Did you get voted off the island?" Which was stupid, because who would want to get rid of this adorable hunk of a man? Probably idiots. He was better off without them. Though, I suppose everyone has their limits. Maybe they hadn't been fans of charm and ridiculously good-looking hair.

"Not quite." As thick-headed as I was, it was still easy to recognize the tone Jack had used as not good. I snapped my mouth shut, silence be damned. Never going to ask personal questions again. Actually, maybe it'd be better if I just never opened my mouth again. That was probably the best option and I could think of a few people who would probably agree. "There was an accident." His voice was uneven, sounding nothing like Jack at all. All the people around me were insanely strong, hell, they were freaking robots when it came to emotions. One of them cracking, especially Jack, was actually legitimately frightening. "People died…they expected me to save them. Even after I-" There was a hitch in his breath and I felt my own throat closing tight. "But I didn't. I couldn't. Just…guess I wasn't enough like the Doctor. Not even close."

Oh christ. This was a real and total breakdown. I have no idea what to do. Don't panic. Don't.

"That's…that's a stupid thing to say." Okay, that was awful. Not very nice either. Or reassuring. Or even remotely close to 'it's going to be okay'. Way to go.

"Doesn't make it less true."

"But it does. It's just…it's ridiculous." I was still kind of digging myself deeper here.

"Ouch kiddo." He chuckled, but there was no mirth in it. He was trying to act like what he was saying wasn't a big deal. Like I had just imagined that tone of voice that sounded like he was some broken shell of a man.

"I'm serious. The Doctor is some kind of walking disaster. You can't live up to his standards because they're completely insane." My mind flashed back to the casual game of laser-me-to-death-tag he'd been having with those sentries. There was no way he should have walked out of that with all of his limbs intact. "He just falls ass-backwards into luck." Maybe it was even a superpower of his, absorbing the luck of all of his companions. Like a sponge. Or a leech.

"Says the girl who just got rescued."

"Yeah, by you." He was putting some real effort into being an idiot. As a gold member of that club, I had to commend him.

"No," he corrected. "I got steamrolled by a light fixture."

"Actually, I got you steamrolled. If I wasn't so busy being a moron," or, a total chicken. I had sort of failed the whole 'fight or flight' test. Probably something I needed to work on. "If I had just moved when you told me, we would have been fine."

"Maybe," he admitted, but he didn't really sound convinced.

"What the hell were you doing anyway? Leaving your whole escape plan till the last minute is, I have to tell you, a really shitty idea. How were you gonna get yourself out of that in time?" It was awfully bold to set bombs before you actually knew you could escape. Not the kind of boldness that I would embrace any time soon. In fact, it was probably best if I was never in the same room as a bomb, set or not.

"Wasn't really planning on it."

It took a second for that to sink in fully. What did he mean 'not planning on it'? Did he mean what I thought he meant? I rolled out of my lamp so I could make damn sure he knew how angry I was.

"Ah ah, you're supposed to stay-"

"Shut up." I said, wheeling very determinedly toward his cot. It took a few seconds for the white spots that were dancing in my vision to fade, but once they did, I turned my glare power up to eleven. "You…you were just going to blow yourself up?" My voice was an unflatteringly high nagging tone. My mother would have been so proud.

"It's not really as bad as it sounds." Jack was smiling, a little guiltily. Not really how someone should look after they admitted that their brilliant plan for escape was suicide by explosion.

"Really? Because that sounds pretty fucking bad Jack-"

"Is there a reason you're not where Donna told you to stay?" The Professor cut off my tirade as he walked into the room and I shot him a dark look for the inconvenience. Jack was not getting out of the scolding of the century. Not by a long shot.

"Jack here is telling me about how he had this great master plan where he blew himself up instead of escaping. I'm sure that isn't the case, but if it is, I need to be closer so I can punch him in the face." My glare returned to Jack. "Please, tell me I'm wrong."

"It's really not that bad." He was insisting, almost looking nervous at my proximity. Good. "I'm just…well, sort of immortal. It wouldn't have really slowed me down for too long."

What?

What?

"What?" Yes, thank you, my thoughts exactly. It was nice to see I could still verbalize them.

"He would have just revived." The Professor said calmly, and Jack nodded once. Like this was a totally normal conversation to be having. Talking about the god damn highlander. Sure, it wasn't the weirdest, but it was probably very near the top of my constantly growing list.

"So you do remember." Jack said, wagging his eyebrows.

"Some of my memories have been returning, yes." The way they were hate-staring the hell out of each other made me think things weren't really very chill just then. It was almost distracting enough for me not to worry about what other memories might have returned. Almost.

"It's nice to know our time together was special." Jack was furious, but he still had that handsome grin plastered across his face like a mask. The Professor's normally impassive expression deepened into a frown. "Did he tell you about that?" Jack's eyes glittered dangerously as he spared me a quick glance. No! Abort mission! Whatever pissing contest they were about to have, I did not want to get involved. Mayday! MAYDAY!

"Probably not." He shrugged, not taking my silence as a hint. "Probably too busy to mention those times when he held me and the Doctor hostage on the Valiant. What was that game we used to play? Oh, right. The one where you tortured me to death. You were pretty good at it, very creative. Good times."

Wow. Okay. So this was getting progressively more awkward. Did I want to hear more about what a son of a bitch the Professor was? No, I wanted to stick my hands in my ears and go 'LALALALALA'. Jack didn't seem to care though.

"What did they use to call you? Saxon, right? Had that pretty little blond wife of yours." Whoa, hello green rage monster, where did you come from? Right, hearing about Jack being tortured by the Professor makes you uncomfortable, but knowing that he had a wife makes you furious. What am I doing with my life? "Prime Minister of Britain. Bet that was a real hoot. Killing all those people."

"I'm not sure I-"

"Son of a bitch." When it grew silent, I realized that I had said that out loud. Oops. It was just that I had remembered something important. Well, no, it wasn't. Keeping my mouth shut. The one lesson I will never ever learn. "Sorry." I shrank when I realized they were both also staring at me. "I just…I just remembered who that was. Saxon. I told you that's who you looked like, way before. You blew me off like I was crazy…" Wow. Wow I should have just pretended to have Tourette's there. None of that fuzzy 'I was totally right' feeling was coming. Jack had a confused scowl like I was a monster for dismissing the torture, and the Professor was looking like he had no idea what I was talking about.

"Well," Jack said, removing the focus from me again. "He was always a good liar." It sounded like he still had a bit of a grudge against the Professor. Totally justified. Wasn't really sure what I could do about it though. Scold the Professor? I settled on keeping my face carefully blank, but they seemed more interested in glaring daggers at each other anyway.

"Yes, thank you Jack, for that pleasant trip down memory lane." The tone could have been interpreted as dismissive. Or as 'shut your mouth before I shut it for you'. There were a couple options. While Jack certainly had the advantage in weight, I had the feeling the Professor was scrappy, and quick. Both qualities I wouldn't underestimate. Plus the whole 'diabolical' thing. If he was still that way.

And I should probably stop placing bets in my head.

It was nice to watch the battle of egos from the outside. It was uncomfortable as all hell, what with the burning sexual tension between the two, but it was finally nice to not be the source of the awkward argument. Besides, it sounded like these two needed to air their grievances just to get it out of their system. And the Professor looked loads more composed than I probably was capable of.

Whatever, my flustered face was fabulous.

Speaking of which…Why was the Professor now staring at me so intently? Were we having a staring contest? It started to get weird when I realized Jack had now joined. Damn.

"Don't feel too bad, I get lost in those baby blues too." Jack smiled sweetly, his voice dripping with venom.

Yep, that will be my face, burning bright red as I immediately looked at the Professor. I mean, they were a nice color, but that's not- That wasn't what I had been looking at. Crap, but it is what I'm looking at now. Don't think crazy thoughts, don't think crazy thoughts. Why is he still looking at me? He was kind of giving the impression that he was waiting for a response.

"Sorry, what?" I should have punched Jack when I had the chance.

"You still need to sit under the bioaccelerator, your lip needs some time." Instead of waiting this time, he just started to drag my chair under the lamp. I clutched the armrests, trying to maintain a dignified appearance. This wasn't going so great. That's what I get for not paying attention. Guess I rewarded myself a little early on the whole 'isn't it nice not to be the awkward one'. What was that phrase about not counting chickens before they hatched?

You know what? Chickens are dumb. How about that for learning lessons.

"Hey, I just had a building explode in my ear." Yeah, that's right. I had a legitimate reason for not paying attention. Suck on that.

"Yes. Which is precisely why you should stay here." The Professor said as he planted me back beneath the lamp and the blinding light, but not before I could shoot him a defiant glare.

"I bet you'd make an excellent mom." I heard Jack snort derisively. At least he thought I was funny. The Professor didn't say anything, but I imagined I could feel his disapproving frown, even through my personal sunbeam shield of destiny.

"What? You don't want to check on me?" Jack called after the Professor's retreating footsteps. "Psychopaths are so cute, aren't they?"

"Sure." I rolled my eyes, despite the fact that they were shut. While there wasn't a problem having Jack's back on this, it also wasn't far fetched to call everyone on this ship a psychopath.

"I mean, you don't actually believe his whole act, do you?"

"What act?" If he were acting, I'd have to assume he'd act nicer. Usually people acted in a certain way to get what they wanted. So far, the Professor had only acted in a way that made Jack angry, and usually drove me up the wall.

"His whole convenient 'amnesia' game. You know it's just a scam." There wasn't a shred of doubt in Jack's voice. He sounded so confident that it actually freaked me out a little. Probably because of the fact that it had never actually occurred to me that that might be what the Professor was doing. When it should have been the first thing I considered.

"I dunno," I shrugged. No, okay. Don't panic. Maybe that sounds like something crazy ole murderin' Professor would have done, but the man I knew? Not really. He wasn't a saint, but he also wasn't an asshole who would play mind games- Okay. I wasn't completely sure about that. But it did seem like kind of a stretch. "Why would he bother?"

Just because he can. Shut up. No one asked you.

"Are you kidding?" Jack and my inner doubts seemed to be on the same page. "You don't think it'd be convenient for him if we all just kind of forgot about what a bastard he is?"

Wow Jack, tell me how you really feel.

"I think you're missing the part where he's the one with the memory loss."

"Sure. But how could the Doctor justify punishing him for things he can't remember doing? You don't think the Doctor planned on making sure the Master had to answer for his crimes?" He said the name like a curse and I had to swallow, because that was a scary name. Silly, but scary in the way that you knew certain things about the kind of person who would choose Master. One was a twelve year old who took themselves too seriously, and the other was a monster who fully expected people to use it. Having an argument about the trustworthiness of the Professor was, frankly, way above my pay grade. What could I say? I believed him because we had been friends before? If he didn't remember being friends, who was to say he felt the same? Could I really be sure I wasn't some pawn in one of his stupid manipulative games?

Was I sure I wasn't a pawn before?

Shut up. You're really not helping.

"After things slowed down, you don't think maybe he saw that the Doctor was a threat? So he just pretended like it all never happened."

But he wasn't really pretending that. In fact, he was constantly asking about it. Which was part of why I was always so afraid to run into him alone.

"Well…I don't know how much traveling you've done with the Doctor. But when has it ever slowed down? Because 'slow' is not a word I'd ever use to describe it." Tactfully deflecting. One of my specialties.

"Guess I should have known you'd have his back." Jack grunted.

"Excuse me?" Sure, in my head I was avoiding the topic. But I didn't really see how pointing out a serious flaw in Jack's logic was covering for the Professor. Hell, I wasn't even sure I did have his back.

"Nothing."

"I'm sorry about what happened to you Jack. I know it doesn't mean much, but I really am sorry." There was no way that could make anything remotely better, no idea why I even bothered saying it. What was it with people and their excessive need to apologize for things? When in the history of ever had an apology made anything better?

"Don't be sorry. Just be careful Fitz."

"I'm always careful." I scoffed, now he was the one sounding like my mother, but it didn't seem like it would be polite to remind him of that.

"Yeah? Because from where I'm sitting, you're just as distracted by pretty boy as you used to be."

"You think so?" My jaw had clenched so hard it started to hurt. All of the sympathy and understanding I'd been feeling toward Jack suddenly curled up into a tiny paper ball and lit itself on fire. "I'm just kind of funny that way, you know? When people are constantly saving my life, I guess I just give them the benefit of the doubt. Remind me again, who was it that pulled you out of that burning building earlier? That one you were planning on burying yourself under?"

"Just because you haven't gotten bitten by a snake, doesn't mean that you won't."

"That's a really great metaphor Jack." I stood up from the chair, careful not to hit my head on the lamp. Because that was the exact kind of thing I'd pull off in the midst of my grand storming out. "I'm feeling much better now. I think I'll go rest in my room."

"Come on Fitz," he sounded almost apologetic. "I'm just trying to give you a heads up." The last part sounded more patronizing. Like I was such a moron that I couldn't see that the Professor was dangerous. Hell, everyone here was dangerous. Especially me right now. How awful would it be if I walked over and slapped him, right over that newly grown skin of his. When I tried a similar stunt on my little brother after a particularly painful sunburn, it hadn't ended well for me. Guess I could skip it, especially since I'd just feel shitty about it later.

"Next time I need reptile handling advice, I'll be sure to give you a call."