Stages & Missteps
"To err is so human"
Like a cotton candy world, the clouds stretched out in every direction. The wind was cold and wet as it roared in her ears, yet all other sound was washed away. Mary Marvel smiled as she indulged her new powers. As she floated through the billowing whiteness the world below seemed so far away. There were no questions up here. All the doubts were miles away. Her self-image wasn't constantly being reflected in the eyes of others. The transition to adulthood was forgotten for a while.
It would all come rushing back as soon as she landed. There was really no going back now. In some ways it was like she'd graduated, yet she didn't have the safety net of moving back home. She could never go home again. Most of the world saw her now as an adult. The League and the other heroes still saw her as a child, a teenager. For herself, Mary wasn't sure where she fit in. It seemed the public and private selves were at odds. A paraphrase of the old quote kept running through her mind. "When I was a child, I thought and acted like a child. When I became an adult it was time to put childish things away."
Was she really an adult, she wondered? Is it really just a matter of how we look on the outside that defines this? Emotionally she felt no different than she had before. She was just as confused and unsure about everything. While many wish nothing else but to rush headlong into adulthood, Mary was like many that found it a bit frightening. There was such a great emphasis put on the transition in all cultures. Arbitrary dates or years were selected and ceremonies held to welcome a child into adulthood. Could it really be that simple? You turn 13 and everything changes? You have your first period and suddenly you're a woman? Could something as simple as having a party to announce it really make it so?
Yet the opposite seemed wrong to Mary too. Putting it off, not facing that you were growing up and clinging to childhood was denying life. Hadn't that been what she accused Billy of doing all this time? When they used to say the word "Shazam" they could play at being adults, but when things got too much they could just say it again and return to being children. It was really a child's fantasy, all the excitement of being an adult, yet none of the responsibility. It was really a version of limbo, where the natural progress of life was denied. Billy was still content to live like that, forever being one of Peter Pan's lost boys. Mary now knew that wasn't living at all. The transformation forced her to face what she'd been too scared to before.
She couldn't go home again.
Metropolis
A light rain fell over the city and with it a damp breeze had come up. Hippolyta stood at an open window looking out over Clark's city. When she'd left the Embassy she hadn't known where she was going, but found herself here. She needed to talk and it seemed her only friend out here in the Man's world was ironically also the man she'd slept with. Her emotions were on edge and feelings she'd long though she'd dealt with had come rushing back to her. What she was feeling tonight had nothing to do with being a hero or even an Amazon, but ran much deeper.
"Lyta,' he said, causing her to turn. Clark held out a glass of wine and she accepted it. Her eyes flickered to his and then she turned back to the night sky.
"Do you want to tell me about it?" He asked.
"Yes and no,' she replied.
He kept his distance, giving her room, but his eyes took in every detail of her posture. Once again he was reminded of the difference between perception and reality with her. For most she was this immortal being, Queen of the Amazons, more myth than reality, yet as he looked at her standing in front of him he couldn't escape seeing her as a woman. Since their night on the beach it was as if he were seeing her with new eyes. He couldn't help think about how others saw him, as this larger than life hero, above the mortal concerns of everyone else. Isn't that how he'd seen her? Yet that night and the time since had stripped away the illusion. She was flesh and blood, just like he was. Everything about her posture said she was unsettled, vulnerable and feeling alone. It seemed to call to him on a most basic level. He wanted to help if he could.
"I may not have all the answers, but I'm told I'm a good listener,' he offered.
She half turned and looked at him, giving a small smile. She glanced down at the wine glass in her hands, as if it would have some answer about where to start.
"You know why I've done this,' she stated.
"Yes."
"That was all I thought of when I began this, saving my daughter,' she continued. "I understood a sacrifice had to be made and I couldn't let it be Diana. That was all that was important to me."
He didn't speak, just waited for her to continue. She took a sip of the wine and glanced back at the rain.
"It seemed so simple in the abstract. I take her place and sacrifice myself so she might live."
"Something's changed?" He asked.
"Yes, though my resolve has not,' she admitted. "I will see this through, this course I have chosen."
"But?"
"It is suddenly very real to me, Clark," she replied. "The battle earlier stripped away everything that might have let me pretend."
"How do you mean?"
"That woman, Sapphire had won,' Hippolyta admitted. Her voice was very low and seemed far away as she remembered it. "I fought and struggled, but if it hadn't been for young Mary's intervention I would have died. I know that as sure as we are standing here."
"But Mary was there,' he offered.
"Yes, thankfully,' she replied. "But I looked into Death's eye again before she did. All these years later and nothing had changed. When I was just a mortal woman I died struggling in the dirt as my life slipped away. I had the same feeling today. I wasn't thinking of honor or valor or the Amazons or my Gods or any of it. I was only thinking one thing I didn't want to die. Everything else was stripped away and that one shattering thought was left. I wanted to live, desperately to live. I had a greedy, overwhelming hunger for life that was all I cared about."
"I would imagine that's natural, Lyta,' Clark said. "You were facing your own mortality."
"Yes, but you see I've faced it once before,' she countered. "I remember being so helpless. It was such an awful feeling. I knew all my hopes and dreams meant nothing, just as I did today. My life oozed out and the chill slowly moved over me. I was so utterly alone. It was awful. I found out today nothing has changed. Thousands of years have gone by. I've been reborn as an immortal Amazon and shepherd of my people, yet in those final moments it was still the same. I was alone."
As she was talking, Clark had turned away.
"We all die alone,' he whispered.
Hippolyta looked at him, his face half in shadows. Something had come over him that she hadn't expected. When he turned back to her she saw a reflection of her own feelings in his expression.
"I've never talked about it with anyone, but I know what you mean,' he said. "I fought Doomsday and died. Before that I had almost believe I couldn't die. I began to wonder if perhaps I was immortal too, but that all changed that day. In the end I'm not sure if I was fighting Doomsday or just for life. I remember the last moments so well. I couldn't hear or see anything or anyone. I knew they were there, but I felt so far away. I was alone and then it was all over."
"Yes,' Hippolyta agreed. "I felt that today. The loneliness."
In that moment Clark wasn't thinking about the rest of his life, but only this moment. Was he still a good man as his fingers moved to stroke her cheek, that's for others to decided. Was this a betrayal of Dinah, yes. Was it a betrayal of everything he thought he believed, yes again. Was this a betrayal of others and their trust in him, the answer was yes to all of it, yet his fingers continued forward.
Had this been what she was seeking when she came here? Hippolyta wasn't sure. She had no illusions about what this was; yet she didn't pull away as his fingers made contact. Titles, honors, responsibilities were just words, like glory or honor or valor had been in those last moments. She was given a reprieve from the end, who knows for how long. That lingering, endless nothingness was still rushing towards her. It might come tomorrow, which meant these were the last moments she had. For all the words that were supposed to mean something, they paled against the loneliness. Death makes us all so human and no human wants to be alone.
As she moved closer, Clark welcomed her into his embrace. He was again crossing a line he shouldn't cross. He'd been raised to believe that a man should live by a code of honor and he'd tried to do that for most of his life. Yet like all of us, he didn't always live up to those ideals. He had the same mortal failings as everyone else. He also had the same wants and desires. He was just a man after all. The Super part was what the public believed and what they saw when he confronted evil. He fought the good fight because he could and because it was the right thing to do. He was a hero because of it, yet no one is always a hero.
He was a man and Hippolyta was a woman. The loneliness had brought them together and neither resisted it. Others would most likely condemn their actions, but they wouldn't understand what was happening in this moment. When their lips touched it was as if the loneliness was pushed away. It might seem like a small thing, yet it was all that mattered in the moment. Neither objected as they moved towards the bedroom.
Mount Olympus
It had long been the home of the twelve main Gods of the Greek pantheon, along with many of the lesser Gods. Its palace was not defined by time or space and each God could have their own realm to look over. Olympus was not shaken by winds nor ever wet with rain, nor did snow fall upon it, but the air was clear and cloudless, and over it hovered a radiant whiteness. Aphrodite sat in front of the reflecting pool watching multiple events on Earth. Her breathtaking beauty was a mask of serene calm and gave away nothing of her thoughts. She was just starting to stretch her hand out towards the water when the very ground began to tremble. Lightening and thunder seemed to surround her and as she looked up Zeus came riding towards her on his chariot. He pulled the reins to stop his might steeds and then stormed down to confront her. The difference between them could not have been more striking. A huge barrel chest man, the personification of all maleness, Zeus was as intimidating as ever. Aphrodite on the other hand was the personification of all things female, perfection that went beyond any other being in creation. Anger flashed over his features.
"You have been warned against going against me!" He shouted, pointing an accusatory finger at the Goddess of Love.
"I have not disobeyed your commands, King of the Gods,' she calmly replied.
"You follow the letter, but not the spirit!" He growled. "I want no interference with the Champion's life!"
"There has already been interference, which you know."
"By mortal hands, not the Gods."
"You may allow this to go unnoticed, but I will not,' Aphrodite replied.
"Do not defy me, Goddess!" Zeus screamed. "I will not allow my children to go against my wishes!"
Slowly Aphrodite rose to her feet. She did not flinch against the King of the Gods wraith, but held his eyes.
"I am not your child, Zeus, as you well know,' she calmly said. "I was alive long before you and will be long after you're gone."
"You test me?" He hissed. "I will not allow it!"
"And what will you do, Zeus?' She said with a small smile. "Will you force me into a loveless marriage? Oh, yes, you've already done that, haven't you? Perhaps you'll banish me, but no, I don't think so. Even you don't want to live in the world without love."
"I have other ways, Aphrodite,' Zeus replied. "You were born of the Titans, I would remind you where are they now? You will not interfere!"
Aphrodite looked at King of the Gods for a moment and then slowly began to stroll away.
"She is my champion, Zeus.' Aphrodite turned to him once more. "Diana may be your daughter, but she's my champion."
If the King of the Gods could be surprised, he was at this moment.
"Don't play with me,' he rasped. "You let gossip turn your head and it will not serve you."
"You don't get it, do you, Zeus?" Aphrodite informed him. "I am the Goddess of Love in all forms. You may be able to keep Diana's origins away from Hera and all the others, but not me."
"If you spread your wide gossip to Hera I may have to test your theory that the world can't live without you,' Zeus fired back. "Perhaps I could promote your son, Eros to take your place."
"That's all you're worried about, isn't it?" Aphrodite asked. "That your wife doesn't find out. You have known about this plot against Diana all this time and have done nothing. Your own daughter and you would let these changes happen in hopes that the original sin will be wiped away."
"If that was all I wanted, I could do it myself,' Zeus dismissively said.
"But you would leave traces that others would see,' she countered. "This way it is by mortal hands and you remain in the clear. If the mother dies, who will be left to tell the tale? All your careful work, your artful story telling with slowly unravel, won't it, Zeus? It's amazing the divine clay story has stood this long without someone questioning it. You wiped the mother's mind of the real knowledge of how her daughter came to be. You forgot one thing; King of the Gods, Hippolyta felt love for you that is why she shared your bed. Where there is love, I know of it. Time is not a fixed line for us, but a circle where every point is the same. You seek to wipe out the evidence and thus the deed. The world has changed so much, but you never could resist the mortals, couldn't you, Zeus?"
Zeus suddenly grew to immense size, towering over Aphrodite.
"You mettle at your own peril, Goddess!" His voice boomed through the room. "Other forces are at work or you would feel my wrath, but do not go against me!"
As effortlessly as he had done before, Aphrodite grew to match his size.
"You speak of the Old One's return,' she said with a smile. "I have known of her too. I was there when she rule this cosmos, just as I have always been. Try and deal with her if you can, but do not threaten me about my champion.'
She moved slowly towards Zeus, the full magnitude of her beauty like the most radiant star.
"I have given my word to not directly interfere and I will keep it, Zeus,' she whispered. "When this is over, perhaps you won't be the only one that will visit the mortals. I find myself enchanted by some among them too."
Zeus railed, the ground shook and the sky turned black, but then as quickly as he'd arrived he disappeared into the mist. Aphrodite transformed back into her original size and moved back to the pool.
"I won't interfere directly, but that doesn't mean I will stand by and do nothing,' she whispered. "Sleep, perchance to dream."
She reached out her lovely index finger and touched the water. Small circles began to spread out from the center.
Gotham
Dinah Lance tossed and turned fitfully on her bed. The battle earlier and the energy she'd expelled had finally caught up with her. As she slumbered, her dreams were anything but tranquil. It began with familiar images but quickly they began to change. In her dreams Dinah found herself walking out of her apartment building and into a snowstorm. This shouldn't be, she thought. As she looked up and down the street she saw no one and heard nothing. Everywhere she turned it was only the pure white snowflakes drifted down through the silence. Dinah turned to go back inside, but her building was gone, lost in a sea of white.
Seeing no alternative, Dinah began to trudge her way along the wide streets. She was dressed in her costume, yet felt no chill from the cold night air. It took a moment, but she slowly realized this wasn't Gotham. It resembled the city she knew so well, yet none of the familiar landmarks could be seen. Glancing up at the sky, she could barely make out the moon and the evening star overhead. They seemed to impossibly far away and so close she could touch them. Pulling her jack absently tighter to her body, Dinah began to move down the abandon streets.
How long she had walked she had no idea, but suddenly music began to drift through the silence. Venus by Shocking Blue seemed to the song and Dinah changed course and headed towards it. The street she found herself on was unfamiliar to her. It was composed of marble. It was like nothing she'd seen before, a pure pale blue that seemed to glisten against the snowfall. Periodically it was broken up by windows of enormous size. Seemingly random images would flash over them, just long enough for her to turn, but not long enough to catch all of them. The music steadily grew louder.
Rounding a corner after a long walk, Dinah saw a bright light just up ahead. The music seemed to be coming from the same place as the light. As she made her way towards it, the light seemed to get brighter until she couldn't look directly at it. She wanted to turn back, but something seemed to be compelling her on. The light grew so bright it seemed to wash everything else away. Suddenly it stopped and when Dinah's eyes adjusted a woman was standing before her. The woman smiled and Dinah couldn't help being stunned as she looked at her. She was impossibly beautiful, more beautiful than anything Dinah had ever seen.
"Who-Who are you?' Dinah somehow managed to ask.
"Aphrodite."
"The Goddess?"
"That's the one,' she replied with a smile.
"Should I bow or something?' Dinah asked.
"Most would."
"The thing is I really don't believe in you,' Dinah admitted.
"Yet here I am,' Aphrodite replied.
"Good point." Dinah conceded. "So why are you here?"
"I've chosen you, Dinah Lance."
"Chosen me?"
"Yes."
"Okay, this is really starting to get weird,' Dinah said with a shake of her head. "This is a dream, a really weird dream, but just a dream."
"Believe what you may, but it changes nothing,' Aphrodite replied. "The moment approaches and you must act."
"How hard did Harley hit me?' Dinah asked herself.
"Not as hard as I will if you don't pay attention,' Aphrodite snapped.
"I thought you were the Goddess of Love?" Dinah said. "Sure don't sound like it."
Aphrodite laughed at this and it was like musical notes drifting through the air. She started to move towards Dinah, who instinctively started to back up.
"Look, I know this is a dream, but I'm not comfortable with you coming at me like this,' Dinah said. "I don't want to hurt you, so just stay back."
Aphrodite's smile grew larger as she stretched out her lithe hand and touched Dinah's forehead with just the tip of her finger.
"See and understand."
The moment Aphrodite's finger touched Dinah images began to explode through her mind. She stumbled back, swinging her arms widely but made no contact. Battles raged all around her and she could feel everything sensation. Dinah felt as if she were falling through panes of glass, each one flashing an image into her mind just before she broke through. Some she didn't recognize, but some seemed all too familiar. She saw herself battling alongside Hippolyta and her other teammates. Monsters and demons were all around. The glass shattered. A Golden Lady appeared but then the pane shattered. A woman in black let out a scream and then energy erupted from her chest heading straight for Hippolyta. Dinah saw Clark and Diana rushing towards Hippolyta but they would never reach her in time. The pane shattered and the next was of Hippolyta's dead body lying on the ground. The pane shattered and all the ones after it seemed to shatter at the same time.
Dinah gasped and sat up. It took a moment to realize she was back in her bed. It had been a dream she thought, or had it?
Themyscira
Diana and Artemis had made the trek back to the Oracle's quarters. They had already been searched, but Diana wanted to see them for herself. The new Oracle hadn't moved in yet, as the investigation was still going on. Diana seemed to examine every item in the room, as Artemis watched in confusion.
"What exactly are you looking for?"
"The Oracle was tortured before she was killed,' Diana explained. "Epione said some of the bruises on the body went back weeks."
"So?"
"That means that whoever killed her was here all that time,' Diana replied.
"Okay, maybe it's just the gas, but I'm not following you,' Artemis said. "I read the report just like you. Whoever did this is long gone."
"Why, Artemis?" Diana asked. "Why was the Oracle killed? Everything that has happened leads me back here, to this event as the beginning."
"You said you thought there was a link, but I still don't see it,' Artemis admitted.
"I didn't either, at first,' Diana replied. "It was something the new Oracle said that got me to thinking."
"What?'
"Dreams."
"But you said you haven't had any,' Artemis stated.
"I haven't, but I've only been Queen for a few weeks,' Diana pointed out. "I never met with the old Oracle before her death, but my mother did."
"So you think she had the dreams?"
"Yes, and whatever was in those dreams is why she did what she did,' Diana explained.
"What could make her call another tournament and take the title of Champion, let alone sleep with Superman?" Artemis asked.
"I don't know, but I can't move forward until I do."
"Are you just talking about being Queen, Diana?' Artemis asked. Diana moved over to the other woman and held her gaze. Her features softened a bit.
"I mean in everything, Artemis,' she softly said. "How can I move forward with you or with my life if I don't understand why it happened? I feel like outside forces are at work here, manipulating me and I don't like it."
"So it's time to go out to the outer world,' Artemis suggested.
"Yes, that is where the answers are."
The Watchtower
Wally, Shayera, Zatanna and Mari were sitting at a table. Their shift was over and it was story time again.
"Shouldn't we wait until Dinah's here?' Mari suggested hopefully.
"She had a hard day, besides, it's your turn,' Shayera replied.
"That's why I asked,' Mari admitted.
"Come on, Mari, tell us a story,' Wally urged.
"Why do I suddenly have the feeling I'm watching Captain Kangaroo?' Zee commented. "If you ask for the story about the steam shovel that could, I'm going to hit you."
"You usually hit me anyway,' Wally replied.
"Okay, point taken,' Zee admitted.
"Are you two going to talk all night or let Mari tell her story?" Shayera demanded.
"Wow, you're kind of gungho about the storytelling all of a sudden,' See observed.
"Yeah, we practically had to twist your arm when it was your turn,' Wally added.
"Well, it's not my turn now, it's Mari's,' Shayera said with a smile.
"You sure we shouldn't wait for Dinah?" Mari asked hopefully.
"Nope, you're up."
Sighing, Mari saw no way out of it.
"Okay, but you asked for it,' she said. "I'm not much of a story teller, so keep that in mind."
"No one's going to judge you, Mari,' Wally offered.
"How come you judged me on my story?' Zee asked.
"Cause it was about head lice,' Wally replied. "How gross was that!"
"For the last time it wasn't about head lice!" Zee shouted. "It had a point!"
"I did not get that at all,' Wally said.
"Me neither,' Shayera admitted.
"Imbeciles! I'm surrounded by imbeciles,' Zee groaned and dropped her head into her hands.
"Wow, that's a rough shot at you, Shayera,' Wally said, leaning towards her.
"Me?" Shayera gasped. "She was talking about you!"
"Right, sure she was,' Wally sad with a smirk.
"I was talking about both of you,' Zee shouted.
"Really?"
"Yes!"
Before they could continue, Mari spoke up.
"So do you want a story or not?'
The three looked at each other, but reluctantly let it go.
"A story,' Wally finally said.
"Okay, but I'm not promising anything," Mari said. "This was something that happened to me about three weeks ago at the laundromat."
"You were at the laundromat?' Zee asked.
"Yeah, why?"
"I thought you were a model, a successful model,' Zee admitted.
"I am."
"How successful could you be if you're hanging out in laundromats?' Wally chimed in.
"I wasn't hanging out in a laundromat, I was washing my clothes!" Mari protested.
"You'd think if you were that successful you'd have your own machines,' Wally replied.
"He kind of has a point," Zee added.
"I was out of town!" Mari fired back. "I needed to wash a few things, so I went to a laundromat, okay?"
"I guess."
"I have my own machines, I just needed to wash a couple of things is all,' Mari said in justification. "Why am I explaining this to you two, anyway?"
"You know if you need a couple of bucks to tide you over, just ask,' Zee offered.
"I don't need your money, I really am successful,' Mari fired back.
"Okay, just offering,' Zee replied.
"You know I've had my eye on this cool jacket,' Wally said to Zee. "A couple of bucks would make a dream come true for yours truly. I mean it has a dragon on the back and everything!"
"I'm not giving you any money,' Zee immediately replied. "Oh, by the way, a satin jacket with a dragon on it doesn't say cool it says douchebag."
"How did you know it was satin?" Wally asked. "That's like freaky weird how you do that! That magic stuff is amazing."
"It doesn't take magic,' Zee replied.
"Would you two shut up and let her tell the story?' Shayera shouted.
"Who's stopping her?' Wally innocently asked. The glare Shayera gave him made him cringe just a bit. "Go-go ahead, Mari."
Mari looked at them and was clearly a bit upset about what had been said, but pressed forward with her story.
"So I'm in the laundromat, not because I'm not doing well or need money, but because I needed to wash a few things."
She glared at Wally and Zee to make sure they didn't say anything before she continued.
"Anyway, as I waiting for my things to dry I was sitting at the table when two older women sat down."
"Were they hot?" Wally asked.
"They were both grandmas,' Mari replied.
"Were they hot grandmas? Ow!"
Shayera had slapped him.
"So they started talking about their grandchildren and it seemed one had just had a new grandchild the week before and the other was expecting one the following week,' Mari said. "I was trying not to listen, but they were talking really loud."
She paused and took a sip from her beverage as she remembered the moment.
"It got a little weird, as one grandma was saying that her daughter was worried the baby was too big to come out down there,' Mari explained. "She must have said "down there' like twenty times."
"You know, usually I like stories about 'down there', but I'm getting a feeling I'm not going to like this one,' Wally admitted.
"Would you shut up and let her tell the story,' Shayera said to him.
'You're not going to like it, Wally,' Mari said with a smile. "Cause the other grandma finally said, "You know the cooter stretches, don't you?"
"Man down!" Wally shouted, cringing in horror.
"The what?" Shayera asked.
"Don't make her say it again!' Zee gasped.
"Well I don't know what she's talking about,' Shayera protested. "I'm not from Earth, remember?"
"Too bad!" Zee exclaimed.
"I wonder if I could enter the speed force and go back in time and tear my ears off before I heard that,' Wally moaned.
"It gets worse,' Mari said, smiling as she continued. "The grandma that had just had a grandchild, said her daughter had delivered early and the baby was so small, the daughter was worried her nipples were too big for the baby's mouth. She said her boobs were bigger than the whole baby."
Zee and Shayera cringed at the thought.
"Unfortunately, I understood that,' Shayera groaned.
"Too big for the baby's mouth? What kind of freak was she?' Zee gasped.
"I kind of blackout at that moment," Mari admitted.
The four of them sat there in silence for a moment, as the story sunk in.
"Um, you didn't happen to get the daughter's name, did you?" Wally asked.
The other three hit him.
"Ow!"