Author's Notes:

Okay! Barely got this chapter done on time. So much for stockpiling this break… Anyway, this one is a bit shorter then my normal chapters, but I felt it was a necessary filler.

Also! I have a quick sketch of Shadow on my DeviantArt page! I intend to make a better picture soon. Also, StoryLady35 commissioned to have someone on DeviantArt make my character! This one is technically named Nightmare, an off personality I had considered before simplifying to just Shadow. Nightmare is more… unstable.

Also, I got bored, so… I made Shadow into an MLP Pony. I actually kind of like how it turned out. Anyway, the link to my DeviantArt account is on my profile! Please check it out!

On to the story!

Yeah, you're lookin' tired and broken
Like the pillar of a dock, dead sitting
The water hitting you, but never breaking through
Is "going places" getting somewhere now?
You should be running faster or down days will shatter you,
Talking on what's overdue

Let me ask you once and not again,
Are we half asleep or walking dead?
Let me tell you how the times have changed
The wasteland isn't just for the teenaged

You look so together, slightly disheveled like the free spirit that you are
It's so impressive, doing what's done by few, living your life in bloom
Might feel like the wait staff on the midnight train
You've got your heart in your pocket, heavier than river rocks
How slow till it's full stop?

Let me ask you once and not again,
Are we half asleep or walking dead?
Let me tell you how the times have changed
The wasteland isn't just for the teenaged

Ginny eyes, is this my exciting life?
Or just a lie, 'cause the borderline gets thinner
(Between here) Between here and that small town
I can't outrun it on
Bottled wind

Bottled wind
I can't outrun it on
Bottled wind

It's only
It's only worth what's usin' it

Yeaaaah!

So let me ask you once and not again,
Are we half asleep or walking dead?
Let me tell you how the times have changed (Let me tell you how the times have changed)
The wasteland isn't just for the teenaged
I'll tell it and be done,
Swimming is how sinking isn't sunk

"Bottled Wind" by Polar Bear Club

My grip on my injured shoulder was tight. Too tight. But I didn't care. Today had been… I don't even know how to describe it. With the way things have been going, it's a wonder that we are still sane. But based on how depressed the mood around the base had become, some of us might go over the edge soon.

First Cliffjumper's death.

Then Everon's decline.

Her death.

And finally, the rise of Shadow.

I could see bits of Everon in her. The pain in my shoulder from her dagger had me down for her involvement in the fight, but I could see bits of her, clouded by the pain of loss and betrayal. I never thought I could regret killing a Vehicon, but I think I could in this instant.

When I aimed for Shadow, I hadn't seen her optics yet. I had just appeared in time to see Wheeljack get the slag kicked out of him by an Aurilian. The femme made me think of Airachnid, and though it was unfair to judge her based on her race, I couldn't help it. It made me willing to take a cheap shot, to shoot her in the back.

But then that Primus slagged Vehicon jumped in the way. I guess I couldn't blame him. Everon had always been easy to like. She was strong and caring, but she had a general air about her that personified innocence, and you wanted nothing more than to protect her. And because of that, the Vehicon in question lost his life.

The pain and the anger in her eyes… well, optics now. How did that even happen? Did she not really die when MECH tortured her? What in the frag is going on?

Apparently I wasn't the only one who was confused.

"What just happened?" Bulkhead asked as he helped Bumblebee to his pedes. The poor kid had taken a dagger to the knee, and Ratchet was going to have his work cut out for him between Bee and the rest of us.

I gripped my shoulder wound tighter as I spoke. "What does it look like?" I snapped. "Ev—or should I say Shadow— flipped sides and is now following in Megatron's footsteps."

Ratchet stepped towards me. "Arcee," he said quietly. "Loosen your grip on your wound. You'll damage the patch I made on your energon line." With a scowl, I comply. "You can't be angry with her… She's just…."

"Just what, Ratchet?" I yell. "Just upset? Upset doesn't drive you to turn traitor to your team, your family. Upset doesn't drive you to hit your friends' pain points with a dagger. That girl, that femme, is downright vengeful, and she doesn't give a frag about us!"

"Arcee—" Bee began, but I didn't let him finish.

"We have been suffering since her 'death,' and she has been off playing soldier with the Decepticons! Now, she shows up out of nowhere and frags with our heads!"

"She doesn't remember us." My helm whips to Wheeljack. "She can't remember who we are. It's not her fault…"

My gaze turns to the ground, and I snap, "Being a Decepticon is a choice—"

"Not when all you know is a lie." Oh frag.

"Jack!" I yell. "What are you doing here? You should be at base—"

He gestures back to a rock, where an unusually quiet and sullen Miko Nakadi sat upon said rock. The past few weeks had been just as hard, if not worse, for the children, and from the looks on their faces, their fresh wounds had just been torn right open again.

I start to speak, but Jack cuts me off, his voice showing tones of trying to be strong, but occasionally breaking as expected from a brother both pained and confused over what has happened to his sister. "She needs our help, now more than ever. I know your hurt, we all are… but she needs us whether she knows it or not."

I turn my gaze away from my partner as my memories drift back to the night that everything changed. Primus, I wished we had tried harder to get them to leave when we played those tapes… Then maybe they wouldn't have been so torn up over what had happened to Everon.

After her near meltdown, we had all agreed to give her time and space, to let her calm herself. That didn't stop us from worrying, all of us tensely congregated in the main silo of the base, either pacing or anxiously shifting as we waited for her return or call or something.

But nothing ever came.

Thirty minutes turned to an hour, an hour to two, soon Wheeljack began to get restless, panicking over her fear. Eventually, the fear subsided to nothing as he explained that he couldn't sense her anymore. Then, all we could do is wait. We were full on panicking at that point, not knowing where she was or how to help her. Eventually, we reached the twelve-hour mark of Everon receiving the monitoring necklace from Wheeljack. All agreeing that this had gone on for too long and equally worried, we let Wheeljack pull up the footage that the device had recorded.

The 3D scans from the pulses given off by the device played out before us on the silo floor, the children sleeping off their exhaustion over on the couch platform. Wheeljack linked the video sounds to our comm channel to keep them from hearing, and we settled into playing through the twelve-hour recording.

Skipping through any nonessential parts, we watched Everon from the time she left to her meeting up with Damien. We watched as they talked, as she vented, as he did the best to calm her. I remember laughing lightly as the others got upset over her tattoo. But then, our sparks practically stopped.

How could we have been so stupid? I knew from the start that her involvement with MECH would only end badly. I should have fought harder to keep her off this assignment despite how adamant she was for it. I swore to Cliffjumper… I swore to my partner, my brother that I would protect her with all of my spark should something happen to him.

And I failed him. I failed him horribly.

As if to add more pain to our sparks from seeing them drag her away, when seeking help, she didn't call us. She called them. It took all my willpower not to storm from the room at that point. Deep in my spark, I knew that the Decepticons were better equipped to track her open cell phone line: they had Soundwave, better tech, but… it still hurt us all.

But even that wasn't enough. We watched as Silas baited Everon and Damien, questioned them. We watched as Silas took her shard as a 'trophy.' We watched as they moved their focus to Damien. And we watched as they tortured him right in front of her.

The pain in her eyes… We knew they could do anything to her and never hurt her as much as watching her friend suffer that way. Eventually, they realized that this avenue was going nowhere. So, Silas simply drew a gun and shot him point blank in the chest.

If watching Damien die had been bad enough, Silas finally moved on to our girl. She held strong, she never gave in, never told him anything about us. At times when she did speak, she managed to unnerve even Silas himself.

By this point, I was even praying to Primus for the Decepticons to find her. Her being with the Cons… the idea may sicken me, but at least they cared for her. At least they would protect her, as well as not have any constraints over slaughtering these vile humans.

But they came too late.

As the final blast of the gun filled our audio receptors, I heard a scream from the platform behind us. I turned with dread in my spark to see Miko hysterically crying into Jack's chest, Raf standing by my partner's side with tears dripping down his face. Jack merely stared at the projection of Everon's body with a hollow and blank stare as he numbly held the weeping Miko.

None of us could really function after that. We found the base where the torture took place, but the building didn't last long. As soon we found the spot stained in her unique purple blood, her body gone and the recording necklace discarded on the ground in the blood, the mechs in our group just… exploded. Even Optimus. The building was soon demolished to nothing but rumble.

Only Ratchet and I were the ones to not join in on the rage filled destruction. Ratchet was simply… despondent. He just stood there, not speaking, not responding, simply there. His stance was slumped and defeated, his optics pained. I, on the other hand, stood resolute and tall, optics hardened, as I cradled the limp and broken form Everon's human partner.

We buried the young man alongside Cliffjumper.

Now, here we are, still broken, but more confused than before. I sigh as I look to Jack, and with a tired look, I say, "I know. I know she needs our help. I just don't think she is going to accept it… For all we know, her mind could already be too far gone."

As Bulkhead reached for the sad little Asian girl, Miko's head snapped to me, anger flaring in her eyes. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Miko—" Bulkhead starts, but she cuts him off.

"Everon is alive, we have a chance to get her back, and you're acting like she is already a lost cause!" Miko screams at me. "How can you give up on her?!"

Scowling, I respond, "I'm not giving—"

"Your partner would have bent over backwards to save her!" I can't help but visibly flinch at her harsh words.

"Miko!" Optimus yells. "That is not acceptable. And as to what Arcee is referring to, I fear she might have some validity to her statement."

"Okay, now I'm confused…"

We save the discussion for when we are back at base. Taking a breath, I continue. "Shadow is an Aurilian."

Recognition flashes in most of their optics, but the humans and Bee looked even more confused then before. Raf asks hesitantly, "But… I thought she was a Cybertronian. Does this have something to do with her wings?"

Optimus decided to explain for me. "An Aurilian is a species of Cybertronian, one that has mostly died out. The only way to tell if someone is of Aurilian heritage is if they have extra appendages, such as Everon's wings or—"

Jack's eyes widened as he said, "Airachnid's legs." He looks to me, and I can't meet his gaze.

With a nod, Optimus continues. "Yes, and the appendages are only found on the femmes of the blood line. Mechs can be carriers of the blood line, but since mech births are more common, and most sparks come from the Well, it is near impossible to keep track of who is a carrier of the trait."

"At least in this case we are sure of the gene carrier." Ratchet steps forward and speaks freely for the first time since Everon's death. "Megatron's demeanor follows the characteristics normally seen among Aurilians. Short tempered, strong rages, yet draws followers with ease, many qualities we have seen in Everon in the past."

"Ugh!" Miko screams from where she had curled on Bulkhead's shoulder. "Why do you all keep trashing Everon! She isn't like that!"

"Miko," Bulkhead says gingerly. "Aurilians were known for… well—"

"Insanity." All gazes turn to me, varying from sad, knowing looks to shock and confusion. "Aurilians were prone to falling prey to insanity. She's always shown signs, but we've never wanted to see it. Her mood swings, her personality shifts may have been strengthened from her spark pains, but now I see it was only a matter of time."

"Don't say that!"

"Miko—"

"You hate Airachnid!" She screams. "Just because Airachnid is crazy, doesn't mean Everon is going to be the same! She just… she can't be going crazy… she can't… we just got her back…"

As tears threaten to spill down the young girl's face, Ratchet continues. "We don't really know much about the subspecies. They tended not to trust regular Cybertronians. The only real conclusion we could come to was that they were a sort of evolutionary link between us and ancient Predacons."

"Preda-what?" she asks between sniffs.

"Similar to human dinosaurs," Bulkhead offered.

"Dinobots?! You guys have Dinobots?! Why was I never told about this?!" She always did perk up easily…

Ratchet sighs. "Predacons are extinct, and do not get me started on the Dinobots." He then gives Wheeljack a pointed look.

"Hey!" Wheeljack says in a defensive tone. "Don't drag that back out into the open."

I turn to him and speak tersely. "You've been pretty quiet during all this. I thought you would have more input on the subject."

With a sigh, he says, "Look, just a few hours ago, I thought she was dead. The girl I loved was dead. Now, she's alive, living and breathing and walking around so quite honestly, I couldn't give a frag whether she is a Decepticon or an Aurilian or anything. She is alive. That's enough for me."

I look at the mech before me, and I can't help but think back to his behavior for the past few weeks. After the incident of tearing down the MECH base with the others, he sped off, not even coming back to base with us. We didn't see or hear from him for three days until he simply pulled back into the base, low on energon and unusually quiet, even for him.

The two of us just stared for a minute. One saw hope, a new light. Wanted nothing more then for things to the way they were before. The other saw the harsh reality, one no one wanted. Things will never be the same, no matter how hard anyone tries.

It shouldn't be that hard to see who was on which side.

I give a heavy sigh as I look to the ground. "I loved her too. I want nothing more then to have her back." Moving to leave the main silo, I add without looking back, "But I'm not getting my hopes up. I just don't think I could take it if I failed Cliff again." Before anyone else could respond, I'm already out and heading to the roof.

"Hey Cliff," I say solemnly as I stand awkwardly in front of the stone pillar. "I haven't come to see you in the past few weeks… I guess I've just been too ashamed."

I turn to face the vast expanse of desert before me. It was so quiet, so serene. How could everything seem so perfect when nothing is right? "I failed you. When you made me promise to watch her should something happen to you, I didn't take it seriously. I never really let myself get close to her because I always expected us to outlive her. Then you died."

I flexed my hands into fists. "Primus, she couldn't take it. I couldn't take it. You didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve to die…" Releasing my flexed fists, I sigh and say, "But neither did Ev. That is, if she really did die…"

Crouching in front of the grave marker, I continue. "Wonder if you know what's going on. Even if you didn't, you would probably still be talking up a storm, trying to distract us all from the dark cloud that's been hanging over our helms…"

"You know, I used to wonder why people would talk to the dead." My gaze snaps to Wheeljack who had somehow snuck up behind me. "Thought people were crazy for doing it. But since Ev died…" He then met my gaze with a pained look in his optics. "It's the only thing that's kept me sane."

Looking away, I tell him, "The difference is your ghost isn't dead, now is she? Mine is still dust…"

I can hear him begin to speak, but we were both alerted by Ratchet over the comm. "Arcee, you need to get to the main silo, now."

Confused, I ask as Wheeljack and I start heading for the lift, "Why, what's wrong?"

"We have an encrypted Decepticon comm coming through. Whoever it is, They are requesting to speak to you."

By this time, the lift had almost fully lowered itself, and I merely announce to Ratchet, "Why in the frag would we accept a Decepticon call? And why me?"

"It could be Ev," Jack says from the human platform off to the side.

Then, Miko chimes in, "And you were the one to shoot her Vehicon friend. Maybe she wants to threaten you!"

"Great…" I mumble.

Optimus then decides to speak up. "Given the recent situation, I do not believe we can afford not to answer. This call may provide us you an explanation as to what is going on."

"Fine!" I snap, walking up to the monitor. "But I don't have a good feeling about this." Then, I angrily jab the accept comm button, and as a familiar face appears on the screen, I can't help but scream, "What did I tell you!"

"Oh, Arcee. Is that anyway to greet an old friend?"

Eyes narrowed, I venomously spit out, "You are no friend, Airachnid."

"Hmm, well then," the Aurilian Con sarcastically huffs. "Is that anyway to treat the femme who brought back your precious Everon?"

"Wait what?" Jack announces from the side, and I can't help but glare at him to be silent.

"Oh! Is that Jack?" Airachnid asks excitedly. "And how is my favorite human doing? Is miss perfect here taking good care of you, or would you prefer a femme who is more fun?"

"Don't you dare talk to him, witch!" I snarl.

Her optics narrow as she glares at me. "Hmph. Leave you to be the one to judge a femme on her race. Is that why you took a cheap shot at the little Princess?"

"Why you-"

"As for me being a witch," she continues. "I am the witch who not only brought back Everon, but I'm also about to help you again."

"How did you bring her back?" Ratchet questioned.

Rolling her optics, she responded, "Really now, someone as old as you must have heard the rumors about my kind. Well, I'm here to say that those rumors are true. And because of your brat being so stubborn, I have a task I must complete or else I die from breaking a spark promise."

"Now that wouldn't be such a bad thing," I say with a smirk.

Her smirk is more feral then mine could ever be. "Well, then I guess you don't want me to revive Cliffjumper."

And, end scene! Yes, a very short chapter, but one- I barely had time to finish this, and 2- the next two chapters are going to be very long.

Also! Seeing as how I didn't get to stockpile chapters, these are going to be written in my free time over the semester. So, if I don't post on a Friday or Saturday, it means life is kicking me in the aft and I haven't gotten to finish your chapter.

I apologize in advance.

But check back the next week because there should be another chapter posted the following week. Anyway, as always, please review! Thoughts, opinions, any concerns are welcome!