Author's Notes:

Okay, I went a little… weird after writing the chapter. As in, I started writing crack fics, which led to me making the series "Misinformed." It's weird, so if you read it, be warned…

Anyway, on to the chapter! I've been so excited to reach this point, and I really want some critical reviews for this and the next chapter!

Also, special thanks to Alphabeat and Mist Howler for giving feedback on this chapter~!

I'm not the one who's so far away
When I feel the snake bite enter my veins
Never did I wanna be here again
And I don't remember why I came

Candles raise my desire
Why I'm so far away
No more meaning to my life
No more reason to stay

Freezing feeling,
Breathe in, breathe in

I'm coming back again

I'm not the one who's so far away
When I feel the snake bite enter my veins
Never did I wanna be here again
And I don't remember why I came

Hazing clouds rain on my head
Empty thoughts fill my ears
Find my shade by the moon light
Why my thoughts aren't so clear

Demons dreaming
Breathe in, breathe in

I'm coming back again

I'm not the one who's so far away
When I feel the snake bite enter my veins
Never did I wanna be here again
And I don't remember why I came…

Voodoo, voodoo, voodoo, voodoo.

So far away...

I'm not the one who's so far away...
I'm not the one who's so far away...
I'm not the one who's so far away...

"Voodoo" by Godsmack

When adjusting to anything new, you are bound to have some issues. A new job, a new transplant… But I am pretty sure that my cases are unique.

Leaning forward against the metal desk in my quarters, I vent hard, not knowing why I am venting when I know I do not need air. But then again, maybe I do. I mean, I still dream like humans: my mind still retains aspects of its human thinking, and it tries to bring forth the old memories that were lost to me.

And I wish it would stop.

Growling lightly, I grip the edges of the table tightly, light scratch marks drawing along its surface. I didn't want to remember. Yes, I would love to have the memories back of my childhood on board the Nemesis, but I didn't want the memories of my time with the Autobots. I don't want the chance of fond memories of the Cybertronians who nearly killed Knockout, who killed Rowback…

Finally managing to calm the venting of air, I slowly straighten up, my wings lifting back up from where they had slumped on the ground to settle against my back. Turning around, I lean back against the table while still gripping it for support. Ravage approached from where he had stood off to the side, curling about my legs as he affectionately purred.

This recharge had been bad, another from the torture. The only highlight was of another ride in an increasingly familiar red Charger. My brows scrunched together. I could not remember this Autobot during the fight. Either he wasn't present, or maybe—

That's when I yelp in pain, falling to a kneeling position as Ravage made a startled snarl and paced around me, nervously yowling. My spark ached in my chest, and I clutched at it while squeezing my optics tightly shut. But, soon the pain ebbs away, and I'm left to growl in annoyance.

What was that? Why did it hurt so much? I slowly rose, muttering, "It's okay Ravage. M'fine…" Shaking my head, I decide to ignore it. I needed to get back to work, to get back to overseeing the ship.

Letting my new visor slide into place, I open the link to Soundwave's systems as I leave my quarters, Ravage trotting silently at my side. It had only been about two days since the incident with Knockout, the day he awoke, and thank Primus, he was finally starting to calm down. The mech was still slightly upset over my self-upgrades, but he was beginning to let it pass, mainly because I was slowly gaining back my normal system levels under his strict watch and forced recharge.

Walking along at a leisurely pace, Soundwave displayed all the system updates from the past two hours upon my visor, and I slowly began to sift through it with my mental uplink channel. Still, the pain that had shot through my spark lightly ebbed on, causing me slight discomfort, making me grimace. Knockout would just blow a gasket if he knew I was any bit of pain.

I was too busy to get locked in the med lab for more scans. The thought makes me pause and shudder before continuing on my walk. I have grown immensely against the idea of being scanned. I felt exposed, and quite honestly, what could be so wrong with me to warrant all these scans?

Besides the pain in my spark that was at a low pulsing feeling.

Ignoring it and pushing all thoughts of the pain away, I finish with the documents on the optic visor before speaking into the comm to Soundwave. "Okay, crew and maintenance finished with the ship way ahead of schedule. I want you to start ground bridging them to the surface. Keep crew five, eight, and thirteen onboard for precautions, but I want all the rest of the teams assisting the mining details in stabilizing the caves."

I received no response, but I didn't need one. I knew Soundwave would get the job done. He was highly loyal and competent, and I knew I could trust him fully. As I continue to walk, I let out a sigh, letting the emotional strain settle, letting myself truly begin to think about everything that had happened.

Unfortunately, the moment of contemplation was short lived.

Ravage stiffened and began growling before turning around and standing in a crouch, causing me to spin around as well. Seeing the outline of a shadow behind me, I immediately knew who it had to be. "Come on out! I know you're there."

A low chuckle comes from the shadows of the darkened ship's hallways, and soon, Airachnid slowly steps forward, her eight legs calmly settled against her back while my wings bristled agitatedly at my sides. "You know, that's what you said the first time we met."

Optics narrowing as I straightened my back to glare at her. "Why do I have a feeling that our meeting wasn't under the best of circumstances?"

She smirked, and before I could respond, she grabbed my forearm, and yanking it forward, she unlatched the armor cuff and displayed my now exposed silver protoform skin. Running down the length of my arm was a long, jagged scar, and I couldn't help but shiver as a faint memory of pain shot up my arm to wrap about my spark, irritating my already present spark pains.

"A token I left you during our first meeting… you left me missing limb." She then gestured to me with one of her spider legs. "But this was the first time you were exposed to my poison, and the first time I was alerted to your possible heritage… only another Aurilian could have survived that wound."

I yanked my arm from her grasp. "Well, good to know." Snapping the armor in place as I turn around, I snap, "You've been missing for too long. See to it you approach Soundwave for your assignments and don't go wandering off again."

"Well, someone has certainly become a big girl…" she cooed. "Finally accepted that things aren't always sweet and nice."

Spinning on my heel, my wings bristled as I moved to face the femme, practically chassis to chassis. "What. Do. You. Want?"

Her feral smirk grew. In a sickeningly sweet and mock innocent voice, she leaned her face in closer to mine. "Well, I just assumed you would want to more about our kind?" Her smirk grew to a grin as she slowly pulled back slowly. "But if you're satisfied with Knockout's pathetic explanation of Aurilians…"

Turning to walk away, she knew that I understood her perfectly. She was using that word again, and I felt my wings flex against my back in an agitated manner. I wanted to know. I wanted to know what I was. And I hated to admit that she was the only answer I had.

"Wait!"

"Did we really have to leave the ship?"

"Yes. There is a reason why little is known about our kind: we tend to go to extreme measures to ensure it. So, feel privileged that she wants me to explain anything to you."

I pause in my pursuit of the spider Con. "She?"

I could practically hear the smirk in her voice. "Yes, she. All of our kind is female, and as to the 'she' I am referring to… well…" She lets out a dark chuckle as she turned to face me. "Shiaron is believed to be our 'pagan' goddess."

I tilt my head to the side in a curious manner. "Believed to be?"

"We have no goddesses," she responded as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Shiaron is merely a spirit, and a powerful one at that." She turned to start walking away, me quickly following suit. "Most Aurilians speak to her at some point. Some more then others."

Moving to stand beside her, I ask, "Is it right to believe that you are in the 'some more than others' category?"

"Smart femme," she drawls. "For the most part, though, she had one main goal in our conversations: your resurrection."

"Why?"

Her optics rolled in annoyance, and I realized that this Shiaron is probably the only reason Airachnid is bothering to teach me these things. "I'm not at liberty to say. But let's just say, I wasn't exactly a willing participant." Upon my confused gaze, she elaborates. "While she can portray being sweet and helpful, she is really a conniving little glitch. Ancient or not, I don't like her."

In reply, I respond, "So, she's like you."

A smirk grew on her face. "You definitely have a way with words, little flyer," she snaps sarcastically. Then, with a shrug, she adds, "But, I guess I would be lying to deny it." Her walking stopped as she gazed around the clearing we were now in. "Especially given the false pretenses that I used to lead you here."

Instantly on the offensive, I prepare to yell at her when I heard the familiar sounds of a ground bridge opening. To my horror, the Autobots, all of them, begin to file out. "Traitor!" I scream at Airachnid, who merely scoffs in response.

"Calm down, my Lady. I'm not handing you over to the Autobots." She moves to casually stand between my tense stance and the enemy who watched the exchange with equally tense stances. "I have a debt to repay today, as do you. So, I suggest you behave to make this easier on all of us."

My attack stance only deepens, my servos ghosting over my daggers while my gaze dared any of them to move. Lowly growling, I snap, "Explain."

That's the point when the white Autobot, the one who kissed me, stepped forward to speak. "You didn't tell her what we were doing today, did you?"

With a scoff, Airachnid responds, "Because the Decepticons' new leader would be so willing to aide in the resurrection a dead Autobot."

"What?!"

Rolling her optics yet again and shaking her helm, Airachnid glances at the Autobots while gesturing to the confused me. "See what I mean?" She then looks back to me. "Now, some ground rules—"

Her words are cut off by a startled yelp from the giant green Autobot. "Frag! It's Ravage!" Said symbiot had lunged from the brush behind the Autobots and had slashed at yellow one's leg. He dodged my symbiot, but not without receiving deep gouges along his hip plate.

Ravage landed to the side, sliding back a bit along the dirt, only to lunge forward a bit. Soon, Optimus and Arcee were firing upon him, but he easily dodged among the blasts and made a beeline to the Autobots' medic. He reached the stunned medic and without stopping, lunged into the air, only to have the giant one—Bulkhead, I believe his name to be— grab him mid jump and chuck him over Airachnid and near me.

"Ravage!" I scream darting over to slide down beside him. A quick glance led me to see that besides a few scrapes, he had no serious damage. He simply gave a quick, affectionate grumble and nuzzled his helm to my chassis before standing crouched between the enemy and I, growling dangerously while displaying his wicked fangs.

"Huh," Airachnid said casually, tilting her helm with her arms crossed over her chassis. "Forgot about him."

In response, the blue femme of the Autobots shifted her blasters, aiming them at the Spider. "You swore that there would be no tricks—"

"And there are none!" She snapped back. Then, returning to her usual nonchalance, she responded, "I just forgot how protective symbiots can be of their hosts."

Wide opticed, the yellow one spoke next, or at least, he spoke in his own way. Ravage is her symbiot? But I thought he belonged to Soundwave!

"Forget that, Bee," Bulkhead responded. "I thought he was dead!"

With my own growl, I shift to stand beside my cat. "Soundwave gave him to me. How or why is none of your business!"

"Alright, as entertaining as it would be to watch all of you continue to argue," Airachnid responds, causing me to glare at her. "We came here for a reason, and Shiaron can be impatient."

"I am not resurrecting a filthy Autobot!"

Ignoring how all of the Autobots seemed to cringe at my words, the Prime stepped forward, causing me to regain my low, defensive stance. He held his palms out in a way that was supposed to calm me as he began to speak. "We do not mean you any harm. We were under the impression that you could help with the revival of a dear friend of ours. A dear friend of yours."

I gave a sound of discontent. "If he is an Autobot, he is no friend of—"

"We're reviving Cliffjumper." I cringe back, the words causing another shot of pain through my spark. The white Autobot notices, and he continues to speak. "You may not remember him, not memory wise, but your spark still knows him."

"Shut up."

"He died a few months back, dragged aboard the Nemesis only to be killed once onboard."

More pain. "Shut. Up."

"You watched…" He seemed hesitant for a minute, but then he steeled away his emotions to continue speaking. "You watched them take him. You were human, unable to help because the Decepticons just would have taken you too. You blamed yourself. You felt it was your fault: that you should have been able to help when none of it was your fault. You never could accept that he died happily, knowing that he kept you safe. Kept you away from the Decepticons."

"Please—"

"You loved him." His voice cracked at that one. "You loved him, and when he died, your spark cracked. And it still is cracked. Because you love him, Ev—"

"I SAID SHUT UP!"

My wings flared out, and I withdrew my blaster before I could think. He had slowly been moving forward, and now he was only a few mere yards away. I could shoot him. I could kill him while the others were still marveling over the fact that I had a blaster installed. I could—

"And I'm sure he still loves you, too." I stared blankly, arm shaking. "Cliffjumper loved you back. And he is waiting in the Nothingness for you." His optics seemed pained, as if admitting this hurt him more then he was letting on. As if admitting this love was painful for him. "He is waiting to be with you."

My shaking grew worse as I dared to keep my gaze locked on his, searching for any sign of a lie upon his features. Searching for the slightest tell that none of this was true. That my spark wasn't fractured. That I had not loved an Autobot. That he did not love me back.

I couldn't find anything.

Letting out a sob, I close my blaster and slowly back away, ripping my gaze from him. I'm still shaking, my spark still aching, and my mind oh so confused. Before I could realize what was happening, I was sinking to the ground with my arms clutching my pained chassis, and two strong arms wrapped themselves around my sobbing form. The gasps rocked my frame, and I mentally berated myself for yet again letting my human nature take control.

"Wheeljack…" the blue femme warned as Ravage's growls grew, obviously preparing to strike. "Be careful…"

"Oh Arcee," Airachnid said with a mock upset voice. "Let the star-crossed lovers be."

Her words shake me from my confusion, and I leap up, backing away from the Autobot who had held me. 'Wheeljack' just sadly watched me before sighing. "I'm not gonna hurt you, Ev."

Straightening my back and hardening my stare, I firmly respond, "My name is Shadow. It would be best if you remember that, Autobot." My optics darting to the smirking Airachnid, I snap, "And why are you so sure that I would help bring this Autobot back? A spark fracture would not be enough to sway me into betraying the Decepticons."

Her smirk grew, and Ravage crouched back beside me. "You don't think that because Shiaron coerced me into bringing you back meant that I had no claim over you?" Her arm slowly raised, her servos slightly splayed towards me. My back began to tingle, and her smirk grew. "I don't think Knockout made you aware of my mark…"

Then, agony shot through my back, forcing me to my knees. Some of the Autobots tried to rush towards me, but she motioned them to stop. Slowly pacing to me, she kneeled in front of my pained frame, arm still held out just slightly before my chassis, her glowing violet optics gleaming ferally.

Her servos lightly grasped my face before strengthening the grip, jerking my helm to face her, staring me dead in the optics. "My mark resides on your back. A black inked spider. It means I have a claim over you. And you owe me."

Snarling, I snap back, still on my knees as I futilely grasp at the earth below me. "I owe you nothing!"

She sighed. "You're a dense one at times." Rising to stand before me, she stared coldly down at my pained form. "I gave you life, little one. I can just as easily take it away. And until your debt to me is fulfilled, all it would take was a simple thought." Her smirk returned. "You are mine. You cannot fly away, little Aurilian."

"Then kill me."

"NO!"

My gaze snaps to the white mech. He looked panicked. Angry. Confused. So many emotions passing through his face. "Airachnid, killing her is not an option—"

"Oh, don't get your axels in a twist," she snaps at him. "She will comply." I move to retort, but she cuts me off by saying, "I doubt she would make her precious Decepticons go through mourning her death, again. And leaving them with only Starscream as the next viable leader…"

Growling, my optics dart to the ground as I harshly ask, "What exactly do you need me to do?"

"Well, well. See, was that so hard?" Turning to look at the Autobots, she announces, "Did you bring what I asked for?"

The blue femme stepped forward. "If this is a trick, Airachnid—"

"You Autobots don't trust me, do you?"

I scoff. "Never thought I would have something in common with an Autobot."

"You have more in common with us then you know, kid." My optics meet that of the large, green mech, Bulkhead. He seemed… kind. His optics were soulful, and at the moment, intensely sad as he watched me.

Actually, they all seemed sad, to a degree.

I decide not to respond. It was easier that way. Rather, I just waited for Airachnid to continue while I slowly rose from the ground. "The items?" she asked in a slightly irritated tone.

Arcee then moved forward, carefully cradling the 'items,' which were wrapped in a tarp. Airachnid moved to approach the femme, her intent obviously to take the items, but Arcee turns suddenly, keeping her optics locked on Airachnid while angling the bundle away. "I still don't trust you with these, and since you're not even doing the ceremony, I will give them to the person who is."

I soon felt everyone's optics, all the Autobots and Airachnid, lock onto my frame as I observe the exchange. Arcee strides to me, a determined look on her face. Soon, she is a mere foot away from me. Trying to keep my reserve, I impassively ask, "Well? What exactly are you carrying?"

Her face falters, obviously unsure of herself, but the steely, emotionless mask soon returns. "I trust you with these more then Ariachnid. Con or not, you are still Everon, despite any protests you might have." She extended her arms quickly and said, "This is all we have left…"

I carefully take the bundle, and after a wary glance to the femme who began to back away while watching me, I kneel to the ground and open it up. Within it was a single chrome horn and a long, bluish silver shard of some kind.

"I was hoping for some semblance of a corpse," Airachnid comments aloofly from the side. With a shrug, she adds, "Well, at least you have a piece of form and spark."

"What do you mean?" I ask, turning my helm back to the items before me. My servos ghost over the two items laid on the tarp, me being too reserved to touch them.

Without me realizing it, Airachnid had approached me and kneeled at my side. "The horn is of form: his physical being and body. This shard is a piece of his spark." She gives a small, dark laugh. "An Airrant to be exact. You were quite a busy little human…."

I glare at her. "What's an Airrant? And what's that comment supposed to mean?"

Her grin grows, and her optics momentarily glance to the white Autobot Wheeljack, who looked a bit….distraught. "An Airrant is a piece of a Cybertronian's spark. It's meant to be given to one's true love. And my guess is that this was intended for someone who couldn't bond it to there spark…" Almost as an afterthought, she said with a smirk, "I am so glad I was born without one."

The look on her face told me everything. This Autobot had intended me to receive his Airrant. My stomach sunk, and I wanted nothing more than to run in that instant.

But I had work to do.

"What exactly do I need to do to revive him?" I ask in a clinical tone, optics clenched shut. I had a low grumble to my side, and I absently reached out to stroke Ravage I kept my optics clenched shut.

She hummed to herself. "You will have to regenerate his body from these pieces… you will be quite exhausted by the end." She then grabbed my shoulders and turned my body to face her. "Now, I have to position you right… Your spark shall essentially be feeding his, so they need to be angled to face each other…"

Her last comment was spoken distantly as she focused on her task. My servos were placed far out in front of me, and my knees, which I had been kneeling on, were spread out a bit. Then, with a surprising amount of care, she picked up the horn and placed it farther in front of my spread arms and the Airrant was placed below my chassis.

"Now," she said when she seemed satisfied with her placement. "I need you to open your chassis."

"What?!" The cry of anger and shock surprisingly did not come from me. It came from the Autobot medic. "She is not exposing her spark to you—"

"She will if you want this to work!" she snaps back. Turning to me, obviously frustrated, she snaps, "Now do it!"

With a slight hesitance, I do as told. Immediately, she peers in and even goes as far as to ghost her hand near my spark, though she seemed a bit upset. "Frag. You're a fragile spark with all of these cracks. It looks like someone hit it with a sledgehammer…." With a sigh, she says, "Okay, one of you Autobots is going to have to forfeit a spark fragment."

"Why?" The Prime questioned.

"Shadow's spark is strong in emotions, but physically, it can't withstand giving up a fragment, and she can't regenerate a whole spark without one. So," she said while still observing my spark. "Which one of you will volunteer?"

"Me." Wheeljack stepped forward. "Feel like I owe the mech."

He approaches and kneels near me, angling his body to shield the view of his spark from me while averting his optics from mine, a bit of chivalry from the Autobot. Once he has the fragment, he gives it to Airachnid without hesitation, but he then stops to lock his gaze with mine momentarily before returning to stand with the Autobots.

Thinking of his intense gaze, I can't help but shiver.

"Now," Airachnid says while carefully placing the fragment with the Airrant. "We can finally begin." Now, she turns serious. "Little Aurilian, are you ready?"

"Would I still be here if I wasn't?" I snarl back.

She looks solemn. "Now, everyone has a trigger to aide in retrieving and then restoring a soul. You will need to use your trigger to find Cliffjumper, and then follow your instincts on how to guide him back with you from the Nothingness."

"Nothingness?" I question. "And what's a trigger?"

"The Nothingness is the void between the Allspark and this realm. As for your trigger, well, its different for everyone." She looks ferally excited. "Mine is watching and imagining suffering. It fuels our abilities, and fades the borders between here and the Nothingness, the realm of lost sparks."

I feel dread building in my core. "You mentioned this before, during our spar. You said my trigger… it was—"

Suddenly, her taloned servos shot forward, scraping along the tender fracture in my spark. Her optics showed no remorse for the action, and she seemed pleased with herself as my body began to writhe under her sharp talons, wings spreading wide behind and slowly shifting to their razor form. "Yours is pain."

I couldn't hold back my scream of agony as my mind drifted to a place far away.

Ta-da~!

Also! I have next week's chapter ready, so no month long wait for that. XD

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SO, YEAH.