A/N:

I want to start by apologizing to everyone who has read, added as a favorite or alert, or reviewed this story. I am so sorry for not posting for so long. I am not sure anyone cares for an excuse, but I feel like I owe everyone one just the same.

I am a foster parent, and usually I use writing as a vent or as stress relief, but at the end of September last year I received a phone call that left me frozen and without a thing to say. One of my former foster children was hurt terribly, and needed me. I can't go into details, but I can say he was returned home to his bio parents, and something really terrible happened. It should have been prevented, it should never have happened in the first place, but it did and it left an eleven year old boy broken. Knowing about his history with our family, his caseworker called to ask us if we would consider letting him return to our home. We of course agreed. It has been months now and taken a lot of sleepless nights, and oh so many tears (both his and mine), but he is finally somewhat returning to the happy little boy he was when he was last with us. As his smiles have returned, so has my voice.

As much as I wish I could say there will be no more long breaks from the story, I can't, I currently have four foster children all with varying needs, and I can never predict what the future will bring.

On to the story, I hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 7

Tara POV

Tara huddled exhausted against the headboard in Sookie's childhood bedroom as Lafayette rubbed her feet. She furiously tried to shove the memories away, but fleeting flickers of her time with Franklin seemed determined to rise to the surface. Tara tried not to think about it, not to remember, but her mind betrayed her. Franklin may not have been as savage as Bill, but he'd still shattered something inside her that would never be fixed.

"You gonna tell me what happened to you?"

"Someday, just not tonight." Tara sighed she wished she could talk to Lafayette, maybe it would help somehow, but right now it was a big snarled mess of images and emotions. She was barely able to understand it herself, how could she try and explain it to someone else?

"Whatever happened, you need to get it out. It's like poison eatin' away at ya, 'til it consumes your whole bein'." He squeezed her foot and waited until she looked up to meet his eyes. "That's what I think happened to our momma's poison done ate um all up, leaving only the bad." Lafayette stated quietly.

"I just can't go there yet. I'm so. . . I can't even explain it LaLa. There's just so much." Tara balled her hands into fists. "I just need time." He nodded sadly.

"You ain't gotsta go no where just yet, you stay right here and let LaLa take care of ya." Minutes passed and Tara saw Lafayette was struggling with something.

"Dammit I see you got something you feel you have to say so just fucking say it!" Tara snapped irritated.

"Sorry hooker, but understand I need to know if you's still got a death wish." Tara's tense posture relaxed and she took a few moments to really consider his question. Did she? Tara knew pain and fear, hell in all her twenty-five years she could count the truly happy moments she'd experienced on one hand, she had a laundry list of reasons why she should be ready to just hand in the towel, but Tara had learned something from her time with Franklin. When he had told her he was going to turn her, she'd looked into Franklin's eyes and thought that her death as a forgone conclusion. She'd truly believed that she was ready to die after Eggs' death, but looking into those eyes she knew she'd been mistaken. She wanted to live! She'd never before felt so truly powerless, a week before and she'd have surrendered, but now. . . She prayed for strength and a chance, she promised herself she would do whatever it took to survive. She hadn't been sure if she would be strong enough, but Tara had fought harder than she'd ever dreamed possible, and now he was dead, finally dead, and Tara was alive. Her chin began to tremble as tears stung at her eyes. They welled sluggishly and she refrained from blinking so as to not allow them to fall.

"No, not anymore. I fought like a motherfucker to survive, Lafayette. I was so stupid before ready to just throw everything away, but when I was really starin' down death. . . " The tears she'd been holding back finally fell. "I won't lie a small part of me was relieved, after everything he'd done I just wanted it to be over, but another part of me, a larger part, was raging against it, refusing to let him kill me."

"We both know bad shit happens, but you found the strength to save yourself, and that's what you gotta take from this. Whatever happened you survived!"

"Not really LaLa. He still killed something inside me that I don't think I'll ever get back. Even if I won I lost something that made me. . . me."

"Tara you is who you've always been, but now you's a little stronger and wiser. Give yourself some time, don't expect yourself to just get over it and heal overnight. But as for right here, right now. . ." Lafayette rummaged around in his pocket until he found a prescription bottle. "Take two of these little friends, and let's get you tucked into bed." Tara nodded dumbly, and took the pills. Oblivion would be nice for a while.

The hot water felt absolutely blissful against her skin, and Tara imagined she could wash away the taint of Franklin's touch from her body. She scrubbed and scrubbed, feeling more and more like her old self. She sighed contentedly, closing her eyes and tilting her head back under the spray, but the calm she was feeling exploded into panic as she felt someone brush their hands up her legs. Her eyes snapped open, to reveal Franklin kneeling in front of her. He nuzzled her stomach, and trailed kisses up her body until they were standing face to face. Tara shuddered visibly, and his fangs snicked down.

"Hello my Love."

"I killed you!" Tara screamed, and the next thing she knew she was sitting up in bed. Tara panted as she scrambled out of the bed landing hard on her knees as the blankets tangled around her legs. She kneeled on the unforgiving wood floor, and sobbed. "I'm free, and I killed that bastard! But he's still in my God damn head! How do I make it stop!" She cried slapping her hands against the floor. Tara reeled trying to understand why her mind was tormenting her. She had absolutely no remorse for killing Franklin, she had done what was needed in order to survive. In fact she was proud, now he'd never be able to harm anyone else ever again, but that didn't change the fear that had a vice grip on her heart, there were still plenty of vampires left in the world. Maybe her subconscious was trying to tell her that she still wasn't safe. Franklin might be dead, but that didn't mean that what happened to her couldn't happen again. It was possible that the Fellowship of the Sun had it right, and there needed to be a war. If vampires were wiped off the face of the Earth, then maybe she and her friends might finally find peace. Tara sighed tiredly, Lord only knew how many vampires were out there, and they were stronger and faster. While it might be nice to dream that one day they'd be eradicated like the parasites they were it wasn't something that was likely to ever happen. And there were more than just the vampires, it was like you couldn't take one step in Bon Temp without tripping over something supernatural.

Like MaryAnn. Somehow the hoax of an exorcism Tara had endured in the woods had summoned the creature. MaryAnn's rein of madness in Bon Temp was Tara's fault, if she hadn't been so fuckin' stupid as to believe in her Mama's hoodoo bullshit a lot of suffering could have been prevented. Her own included. Though if MaryAnn had not come to Bon Temp, Tara would have never met Eggs. She knew that despite all the bad they had done together (under the Maenad's demented influence) that what they'd felt for each other had been real love. He was gone now though, taking their love with him, and it hurt more than Tara could bear. She'd been so angry with Sookie for interfering and unlocking Eggs' memories, but after some soul searching she'd come to understand that Eggs, being the type of person he was, couldn't have lived with not knowing. Even if he'd been under MaryAnn's spell, he had still felt responsible for what had happened. The only ray of hope Tara could conjure was that in where ever he'd gone, maybe he'd finally been able to forgive himself. Tara angrily swiped the tears from her cheeks. His tragic fate was just one of many examples of how these monsters ruined innocent lives, but twice now she'd survived and the monsters had died, so maybe God was watching over her and her friends. Tara murmured a quiet prayer of thanks before she got up from her knees and began getting ready for the day ahead. Though she decided to skip her usual shower.

Even though the house was empty when Tara ventured from her room just a short while later, she had a fairly good idea where she'd find her best friend, and grabbed two glasses of lemonade before heading out to the yard. Tara headed to the side yard where she quickly spotted the old tattered plaid blanket and a dozing Sookie. As she approached Tara noticed Sookie looked even worse than she had the previous day. Tara pressed her hands against her stomach, trying to control the sickening lurch she felt there. She couldn't see much, as almost every inch of Sookie's skin was covered in what Tara assumed was one of Jason's flannel shirts and too large pair of sweat pants, but what little was visible broke Tara's heart. As though sensing someone was near Sookie stirred with a pain filled moan, and opened her eyes scanning warily.

"I knew you'd be out here." She handed Sookie one of the glasses before settling down next to her.

"I used to do this all the time. Just lay in the sun until all my troubles just melted away with it's warmth. Until Bill. . . and then I couldn't wait for the sun to set."

"Hey you alright?" Tara asked as she noticed the tear streaks on her friends face.

"No. . . no I'm really not. I was such an idiot. I knew what he was, I knew he was dangerous. And if I'm bein' really honest that's one of the things I fell in love with." She shrugged her shoulders dismissively. Tara was shocked at Sookie's blasé attitude. Sookie could put her head in the sand and ignore what was right in front of her all she wanted, but Tara knew the truth, vampires were nothing but vicious and evil reanimated corpses. Behind all his mainstream bullshit, Sookie had seen the monster that lie behind Bill's civilized mask. How could she pretend she didn't, just look at how many times Sookie had nearly died since becoming involved with him!

"Are you gonna go runnin' back to him!" Tara yelled angrily. "After all he's done! How can you act so nonchalant?" Sookie gasped and struggled to sit up. Tara instantly felt bad and helped Sookie shift and adjust until she seemed somewhat comfortable.

"Tara Thornton believe me I'm not going back to him and I'm far from indifferent to what he did. And while the majority of the blame is solely on him, I have to accept that I had a part in this mess too." Tara clasped Sookie's hand in hers.

"Sookie you didn't ask for what happened to you."

"Didn't I? I trusted him with everything I am. When I think of how many times I defended him to every one! It's stupid to have that kind of blind faith in someone."

"Sookie. . ." Tara interrupted gently.

"No Tara, I felt it. Or well I didn't feel it, I didn't really trust him. There was this uneasy feeling in my gut from the moment I met him, but I shoved it down, ignored it."

"Sookie he gave you his blood before you could even get a chance to understand what that feeling was. He made you feel that you trusted him, he made you think you loved him. You can't beat yourself up for something you couldn't control! You might have been naïve, but that was your only mistake." Sookie sighed, and scrubbed at her face with her hand. She shot a mischievous smile at Tara.

"Here I am tryin' to put on my big girl panties and take responsibility for myself, and your makin' it impossible." It was Tara's turn to shrug.

"It's what best friends do." She gently bumped her shoulder against Sookie's. "I really am all for you takin' ownership of your mistakes Sook., but this ain't one of 'em. Now if you end up like one of those stupid county singers who keep runnin' back to their cheatin' abusive boyfriends then I'll have to change my opinion." Sookie giggled happily.

"No I know better than that." They settled back down onto the blanket together and basked in the late summer sun. "Tara?"

"Hmm?" She replied sleepily.

"I know you're not ready to talk about it yet, but when you are just know I'm here. We can be broken together K?" A tear rolled down Tara's cheek, it was fucked up, but a part of her was relieved that they could truly empathize together.

"K." The two lounged a while longer until they were interrupted by Alcide.

"I gotta get headin' over to Jackson." Tara sensed that there was more he wanted to say, so she glanced at her watch.

"Shoot, Sook. I gotta go get ready or I'm gonna be late for my shift." Shooting Alcide a knowing look before heading toward the old farm house.

Merlotte's was damn near empty as she began her prep for the night ahead. Arlene and a woman Tara had never seen before were the only ones to occupy any of the tables. From what she could see Arlene was interviewing the woman to become a waitress. Tara felt it was about damn time someone was finally getting around to getting them some help. Not ten minutes later as she was stocking the fridge with bottles, their increasingly absent boss came through the front door. She paused to see how he would respond to Arlene's initiative in hiring another waitress, but he simply kept walking as though it was to be expected. Tara was disappointed that he couldn't seem to be bothered to take a more active role in his own bar. She had half a mind to go say something to him as she finished the stock and went back to the kitchen to get what she needed to get cut up for garnishes, but Lafayette's positive gleeful expression sidetracked her as she passed by him toward Sam's office.

"What's got you in such a good mood?" Lafayette remained quiet, but a smile lit his lips. "Come on LaLa, I gotta know what's got you smilin' like that."

"Jesus."

"Really I thought ya'll was done?"

"We was, but Mama escaped and showed up at my place this mornin'." Tara opened her mouth to interrupt but he continued on. "She's fine, but I had to call Jesus to come pick up her crazy ass and we got to talk and. ." He shrugged.

"I'm happy for you, I never really got to know him too well, but it's obvious he's good for you." Lafayette hummed happily in response off in his own little romantic bubble. Tara headed further into the kitchen and gathered what she needed. She quickly reminded her love struck cousin to update the specials board, before going back out to the bar. Tara was truly ecstatic for her cousin, he deserved to have someone to love with all the crazy going on around them. She hoped someday she could find it again too.

Merlotte's had went from empty to packed in a little less than a half an hour, and Tara was cursing her decision to wear her high heeled wedges, as her feet were absolutely killing her. And even if that wasn't enough to bring her barely contained anger to the surface the seemingly never ending line of ignorant rednecks demanding drinks was. Thankfully no was stupid enough to question her disappearance, or bring up Eggs, but the gossip about Sookie and Bill had her literally grinding her teeth. So when Terry made a rare appearance from the kitchen, where he was assisting Lafayette, Tara waved him over to cover her for a break. He took over seamlessly and Tara gingerly hurried out the back door. She sat atop the picnic table just outside and removed her shoes, flexing and unflexing them until the pain eased. She stared up at the starry sky as she felt some of the tension in her shoulders ebb away as the cool night breeze evaporated the sweat from the unrelenting heat of so many bodies packed inside the bar. After the last few hectic hours Tara's mind was finally allowed a reprieve and drifted aimlessly. So she was completely blindsided when she was snatched from her perch and slammed roughly into the dumpster. A scream froze in her throat as she recognized her attacker. She slammed her eyes closed, and tried to tell herself she was hallucinating, but she could feel his cold hands on her bare arms, and smell his cheap cologne. Franklin.

"How. ." She stammered.

"Are you surprised to see me love? I told you we would be together always. Aren't you happy?" His eyes shown with a maniacal happiness. Tara's heart raced as her mind searched for any possible way for her to come out this alive.

"Of course," She allowed a tear or two to slip from her eyes. "It's just I thought you were gone."

"Oh I imagine you did, from what they told me you made quite a valiant effort to end me. Damn near completely caved in my skull, but sorry love no such luck." He stroked her hair back from her neck as his fangs snicked. Tara swallowed nervously.

"Franklin please. . ." Tara knew she had just moments left. "Franklin, sweetie I . . .I" He snarled and snapped his teeth inches from her face.

"You what love? How will you justify what you did when all I wanted was to love you?" He shook her roughly by the arms before slamming her so hard into the dumpster that her vision swam.

"You don't love ANYTHING! You can't, you violated and terrorized me that's not love. If you're going to fuckin' kill me, kill me. If you want me to beg for my life you're shit out of luck, I won't give you the satisfaction. Even if I die, I win, because the second I'm gone I'll be rid of you forever. No more lookin' over my shoulder, no more fear, no more nightmares. I'll be free!" Tears poured from her eyes.

"Oh no love you've got it all wrong, it'll just be the beginning for us, I know in time you'll come to love me too. After all we'll have eternity together." Tara's scream ripped through the air as Franklin's fangs tore into her throat. It seemed to Tara that her heart was betraying her as is raced faster and faster pumping her precious life out and into Franklin, but perversely she was angrier when it slowed. She gathered every once of strength she had, and with her very last breath whispered.

"You might make me your slave, you might even be able to order me to say it, but I promise I will never, ever love you." It might have been foolish, but Tara felt a sense of victory as eyes fluttered closed, and she drifted away.