"You sure that's everything you need to tell me?" Stan bellowed out to his great nephew.
Dipper responded with a small nod, "Yup, that's everything."
Although it wasn't really the whole truthful story. Dipper conveniently left out the parts where trekked to Wendy's house and stalked Robbie through the forest. He felt Stan didn't need to know everything...
"Let me get this straight," Stan grunted, his eyes narrowing at Dipper "You snuck out at nearly midnight to go for a stroll in the forest."
Stan then pointed offhandedly to the park crew. "Then you just so happened to find a golf cart full of these circus freaks, then get in their cart and help them get here?"
This comment elicited an angry outburst from the strange group, particularly by Muscle Man and Rigby.
"Yeah, that's absolutely how it went." Dipper replied, hoping his great uncle wouldn't see through his ruse.
"Geez, didn't anyone tell you not to get in cars with strangers? I thought you were supposed to be the smart one..." Stan retorted mockingly. "Also, you're story doesn't really make sense."
Dipper's heart started to pound rapidly. He knew he was going to be in trouble. Big time.
"But since I'm losin' sleep every second I'm sitting here and seeing as you're not dead, I'll let it slide this time." Stan said with a yawn.
Whoa... I was definitely not expecting that Dipper thought, still in shock from Stan's words.
"But before we all go back to bed," Stan grunted, fixing his gaze on the park crew "What are we gonna do about those guys?"
Benson, seeing himself as the probable leader of the group, was the one to respond to Stan. "Well, sir. We have some business in town that we have to attend to."
Stan stared back, half-listening and half-falling asleep, at the gumball machine talking in front of him.
"But all of us are tired from our trip here. So, do you have any room around here for us to stay for the night?" Benson asked of the increasingly sleepy-looking old man in front of him.
"Lucky for you, I am a generous man." Stan lied through his teeth.
"We've just added an extra room to the Mystery Shack. It's currently unfinished so you guys can crash there for the night."
Benson breathed a sigh of relief. This long day of theirs was finally going to come to an end. He couldn't wait to slip into the comforting release of a deep sleep. But then in the morning it would be back to the business at hand. Back to the reality of the mystery they had to solve...
"Of course, there is a small fee for staying the night." Stan added with a sly smile.
The old man just couldn't resist making a quick buck.
Benson's face sank back into the usual stony scowl that he wore. He knew somehow that there would be a catch... But he didn't care. As long as he and his employees were well-rested for their search tomorrow, he felt it was well worth the money. So with a grim expression, Benson reached into his wallet and produced a messy wad of money.
"It's not much, but it's all I have. Will it be enough?" Benson asked Stan as he held the money out.
Stan snatched the wad of money and counted it with uncanny quickness. It was almost as if he knew how much there was before he even counted.
$86 and a couple coupons for Wing Kingdom? Geez, that's disappointing... Stan thought to himself as he counted the money. A thought then occurred to him that made him smile slightly.
Eh, I'll just have them make up the rest of the fee tomorrow.
The grizzled con-artist wanted every cent he felt he was entitled to.
"This will do for now..." Stan began, eying Benson the whole time "But you'll have to help out around here to pay for the rest of the boarding fee."
Benson, too tired to protest, just agreed to Stan's terms "Yeah, sure, whatever. We just need to rest right now, Mr. ..."
"Just call me Stan, or Mr. Mystery, the proprietor, owner, and imagineer of the Mystery Shack." Stan replied.
"Yeah, we'll just stick to calling you Stan." Benson said flatly.
After that, the park workers and Mystery Shack employees introduced themselves to one another. Then everybody dispersed to finally settle in for the night. Soos and Wendy walked out the door to return to their respective homes. The twins and Stan headed up the staircase to their rooms on the second floor of the Mystery Shack. The park crew then settled in their designated room, each sleeping on a musty old cot or a lumpy sofa.
As Stan slipped into bed, just aching to go back to sleep, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was amiss about the odd crew that just showed up on his doorstep. He felt that a certain person in the group seemed oddly familiar...
The man with the giant head... Have I seen him before? Something about that guy just seemed waaay to familiar...
Stan wracked his brain to try and find any memory related to large-headed fellow. In Stan's advanced age it took awhile for him to recollect any distant memories. Just when he was about to chalk the experience up to deja vu, he had a slight flashback to a time from long ago. From a time when he was a happy and successful young man. But that brief nostalgia was intercepted by a slight worry. The closest thing Stan felt to genuine fear in a long time.
No, it can't be...
He can't be...
Why is he here?
Stan decided to push these questions out of his mind. His heavy eyelids started to fall. It was no use to fight sleep any longer. And with that, everyone in the Mystery Shack was fast asleep.
Ugh... Why does morning have to come so quickly?
Stan reached for his glasses on the side table next to his bed. Once they were fixed properly to his face, he turned his attention to the blaring alarm clock. It displayed the time in bright red numbers, while producing a painfully loud alarm. Stan slapped the button and rose up out of bed. As he got up, he could feel and hear his joints and bones popping from his many long years on Earth.
He shuffled out of the door and into the hallway. Stan noticed that the door to the twins' room was wide open and they were nowhere in sight. They obviously were already wide awake. So, Stan makes his way down the creaking staircase and into the kitchen. He then sees what the twins were up to.
They had turned the room into a giant dining room of sorts. They took all the collapsible tables and folding chairs and had set them all up. Every one of Stan's surprise houseguests from the night before were seated at these tables. The twins had apparently cooked a huge breakfast for everyone in the Mystery Shack. Even Soos and Wendy were here.
Well, that's a first. I've never seen them here so early before a work shift... Stan thought cynically.
"GOOD MORNING GRUNKLE STAN!" cried a shrill voice.
Stan knew immediately by the ear piercing volume of the voice that it came from none other than his hyperactive great-niece, Mable. He cringed from the verbal assault on his ears.
"Yeah, yeah... Take it down a notch, kid. It's too early in the morning to be yelling." Stan grumbled as he took his seat at one of the few tables. He sat down between Dipper and the gumball machine man Benson. Stan took a plateful of pancakes, and dug into the food immediately.
He then noticed Benson looking straight at him.
"So, uh... You guys sleep alright last night?" Stan asked of the gumball machine.
"Yeah, it wasn't too bad." Benson replied. "At least we got a little rest."
"Good, good..." Stan grunted indifferently.
He then remembered his scheme from the previous night.
"So, today you can all start paying off the rest of the money you owe me for stayin' here." Stan addressed the group with a mischievous grin. "I have the perfect solution as to how you can do so."
Benson didn't like the sound of it already...
"Okay then. The sooner we pay up, the sooner we can be on our way." Benson spoke in reply.
"Seeing how the Mystery Shack is a place where people come to see various oddities, and seeing how you guys are oddities," Stan explained "You all will be part of my next attraction: Freaks From the
Forest!"
Cries of protest from the park crew filled the air of the kitchen. After all, they didn't come all the way to Gravity Falls to become some sideshow attraction for an elderly conman.
Benson suppressed the urge to punch the old codger right in his big fat nose. He replied to Stan in as nice a tone as he could muster at that point.
"There has to be another way, because we sure as hell aren't doing that."
"You forget that I took you in from the outdoors out of the generosity of my heart." Stan reminded them, trying to make them feel guilty.
"Well, if it was really out of the kindness of your heart, then you wouldn't be nickel-and-diming us for money we don't have." Benson retorted in a more biting tone of voice.
"Do you realize how ungrateful you sound right now?" Stan mocked. "Look, you agreed to the terms last night. Either you go along with this or I call the cops."
Stan was hoping Benson wouldn't call his bluff. Stan knew damn well that Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland were the most incompetent pair of police officers to ever be on the force.
"Once we leave town, we'll gladly send you a check for the rest of the amount owed." Benson offered. "Because I'll be damned if my employees and I have to be ogled at by fat, sunburnt tourists all day."
"Pfft, yeah I've heard that song and dance before..." Stan snarked. "You wouldn't be the first to try and promise money and then just skip town. I know all the tricks, son."
"I'm sorry but we have other business in town. Important business." Benson said with finality "More important than dealing with a penny-pinching geezer like yourself."
Stan had heard enough. He slammed his fist down on the table. He got up from his seatand roared at the gumball machine "HOW DARE YOU! NOBODY TALKS TO STANFORD J. PINES LIKE THAT AND GETS AWAY WITH IT!"
Benson was about to return fire with his own personal brand of screaming that had been thoroughly honed by having to put up with Mordecai and Rigby for the few months they had worked for him.
But then Gene's words rung in his mind. Specifically about the mystery man they were supposed to find.
"The name of this man has something to do with the name of this park. That's all I can tell you."
East Pines Park...
Stanford J. Pines...
Oh my god, this is the man Gene was trying to lead us to...
Snapping out of his inner thoughts, Benson looked calmly yet intently at the furious old man before him.
His voice was steady and emotionless.
"Mr. Pines, what do you know about Quintel-Marin Park and our boss, Ogden Maellard?"
Stan paused suddenly from his verbal tirade, almost as if he were punched in the gut and couldn't draw in another breath. He turned completely pale and fell back into his seat nearly fainting. His mouth opened, trying to form some semblance of a coherent word in reply. But it was futile. No sound would escape his throat.
"Uh, Grunkle Stan are you feeling alright?" Dipper asked worriedly as he saw his great uncle act strangely.
Stan didn't acknowledge any of his words. All he could do was think.
Oh shit...
I was hoping that I would never have to face this day...
But if they're here...
That must mean...
God help us all...