Disclaimer: I wish I owned Tony Stark and Steve Rogers. Though I would probably feel obligated to share at least one of them with my sisters if I did.

A/N: Gimme reviews. (Because I am a demanding brat.) Also, is Jarvis all the way capitalized? Does anybody know?

Chapter 8

Bucky had to admit Tony had made it out pretty well in the future. He was rich, which Bucky had never seen coming, (despite all the times Steve had said Tony was simply brilliant), and he had a family. Well, he had always had Bucky and Steve, but he had been a scrawny little orphan, with too big of a brain and mouth. Now, well, he still had too big of a brain and mouth, and he was still scrawny and little, but he was not an orphan by any stretch.

Tony had found a family for himself and Bucky wasn't even sure if he knew it. It was quite clear that the people that surrounded him cared for him deeply, even if they didn't show it. Tony had a family, he had money, who he was was accepted. He had everything he ever wanted.

Almost.

He had almost everything he wanted. Because as he stared across the table at Steve, most likely thinking that he was being subtle, it was appalling clear what exactly made him so sad even though he was so successful. Bucky liked to pretend that he didn't do emotions, but Tony was his friend, so he understood him. And yes, he had always wanted to be successful, but only if he had Steve by his side to brag about it to.

"Pass the broccoli to Tony, will you Bruce?" Steve asked from where he was sitting beside Bucky.

"I don't want vegetables," Tony whined, and for a second Bucky could pretend that everything was normal in the world. But then, as the bowl was passed from Bruce to Steve and then Steve to Tony, reality hit again. Because there was no way, if everything was normal, that their fingers wouldn't have lingered on each other's, and just the fact that they were sitting across from each other instead of so close together that their arm's brushed, was another painful reminder of the wrongness of the future.

"You may think that you can run on only coffee and things bad for you, Tony, but it's not true," Steve said. Tony pouted at him, which Steve resolutely did not think of as cute.

"It is true," Tony argued. "I'm evolved, Steve. I know you might not understand this, as you're not a scientist, but that means I am better than all of you, and I can survive on coffee."

"You are not higher up on the evolutionary ladder than we are, Tony," Steve rolled his eyes, and Tony felt like he was suffocating, like the arc reactor was suddenly not working, and he just had to get out of there.

He retreated to his lab, telling Jarvis to not let anybody in, under any circumstances, and wedged himself underneath one of the tables. He hadn't cried since the first time he had found himself in the future, away from Steve, but his shoulder shook with emotion and his breath was ragged as if tears were spilling down his face.

"Sir, Mr. Barnes is trying to gain access." Jarvis informed him. Tony crawled out from under the table and pulled himself together.

"You can let him in J," He said, sitting down in his favorite wheelie chair. Bucky walked into the room and sat across from Tony, silently watching him for a couple moments.

"It's just so hard," Tony finally admitted. "Because he is still Steve, and I can still talk to him, and I still trust him, and it's like nothing has changed, but then I get the urge to kiss him and I'm forced to realize that Steve would no longer be okay with that, that he doesn't remember that used to have the feeling of my lips memorized, that I used to live in his arms for hours at a time."

"Have you ever considered that he might still love you, even if he doesn't remember you?" Bucky asked.

"Even if I was lucky enough for that to happen again, and I doubt it will, I couldn't live with myself not telling him about that major part of me," Tony admitted. He ran an exasperated hand through his hair. "And if I tell him, well, you know Steve. He would feel terrible and try to force himself and push himself too hard until he got hurt."

"I see your point," Bucky admitted. "But you know, I don't know why you think that you don't deserve Steve. You're his world, Tony. He loves you."

"No, Bucky, he used to," Tony corrected, his mind in the past, when those beautiful blue eyes used to sparkle at him, greet him early in the morning every day. And Bucky knew that no matter what he said, he wouldn't be able to convince the idiot that Steve was absolutely in love with him, with or without the memories.

Only Steve would be able to do that. And Tony was right about one thing. Steve could not be told of their forgotten past, or else he would hurt himself.

And that would only hurt Tony more.