With Bated Breath

by Lady-Ravenhawk

When you're used to fighting battles based on physical strength alone, it is hard to accept that there are some enemies you cannot conquer. Faith and courage will be tested for two families when life-changing events turn everything upside down. But love can find you in the strangest places and strength in even the most dire of situations.

18. Do You Believe in Life After Love?

Tora slammed down the kickstand on his motorcycle and killed the engine as he gazed up at the hospital before him. He didn't know if Eighteen would agree to this, she spent every waking moment at Marron's bedside. But he felt like she needed to get out, get away from that building for just a little bit and get some fresh air. The stress of the situation with her daughter was wearing on her. Being in that place day in and day out for over three months now wasn't good for her. She couldn't stop living just because Marron still wasn't awake.

His legs automatically carried him through the hallways as he thought over his plan. He knocked gently on Marron's door before he opened it and gave Eighteen a smile when he saw her there. "Hey," he said as he stepped inside. He gave a small sigh when he saw Marron still sleeping in the bed. "Still no changes, huh?"

Eighteen looked over to the door, giving the Saiyan a small smile. "No change yet, but I was reading that book you brought over. I'd like to think that she's listening." She rubbed her back, brushing the strands of hair off her face, "Make her wake up. Please. It's been too long. The doctors say if she doesn't wake up soon the chance of her waking up at all keeps diminishing."

Tora frowned at that. "I wish I could make her wake up," he said softly. He crouched down next to Eighteen's chair, meeting her sad blue eyes. "You know I would if I could." He ever so carefully reached out to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear and nearly sighed in relief when she didn't shy away from him. Their friendship was still rather new, she tolerated him more for sure, but there was still the occasional moment when he was afraid of being slapped. "You know, I was thinking about something. How about we get out of here for the afternoon? Marron's safe, the nurses will take care of her. You need to get out and get some fresh air. It would be good for you."

Eighteen looked at Tora, raising an eyebrow. "What? Out for an afternoon?" She looked worriedly at her daughter laying in the bed. The monitors beeped at a steady rate and she sighed sadly, "Well, that would be nice to get out and not eat hospital food for one day."

Tora couldn't stop the grin that split his face. "I packed a lunch," he said suggestively. At her skeptical look, he laughed. "Don't worry! I didn't do anything fancy. Just some sandwiches and stuff. How's a bike ride through the country sound? I went out to Tien's the other day; the trees are starting to turn. I think it'd be good for you." It was a perfect day for it. The sky was clear and the air was still warm with only a very slight chill to it. Fall was officially here and while Tora didn't care much for the cold weather, he did appreciate the beauty of the season. The Earth was still a strange place to him, but he was fascinated by the simplest things here such as the brilliant colors of the leaves on the trees when they turned. His home planet didn't have much in the way of seasons, staying mostly hot year-round.

Eighteen looked at him for a moment, not sure if she was believing what she was hearing. "You like to watch the trees turn? " She could barely even picture it, the big, stoic Saiyan, watching the trees turn to golds and reds, "I thought Saiyans didn't care for the colder weather?" She sat back and looked at her daughter as she thought a moment. If Marron was awake, she'd be insisting to go out on a picnic. "I suppose a little break wouldn't be too bad, just let me leave some instructions for the nurses," she said, leaning over her daughter and pressing a kiss to her forehead, "I'll be back baby."

Tora felt his heart leap when Eighteen agreed to go with him. To be honest, he thought it was going to take a lot more convincing than that. Maybe she didn't dislike him as much as he thought. A smile split his face as he watched her leave the room and he couldn't stop himself from raking his eyes over her slender form. He mentally smacked himself. They could barely call themselves friends, he highly doubted she would be interested in him like that. Still, was it wrong to appreciate her beauty? Her strength?

He sighed and moved to sit in the chair next to Marron's bed. "Hey, little one," he said in a soft voice as he leaned closer to the bed. He frowned sadly, wishing with every part of his being that she would wake up. He gently touched the top of her head, brushing a few strands of hair off of her face. "Wake up, Marron," he whispered to her. "Your mother misses you. She needs you. Wake up, baby, please." He gave a defeated sigh and sat back when she didn't respond. The door opened and he smiled at Eighteen as he got out of the chair. "Ready to go?"

Eighteen nodded and walked back over to the chair she had been sitting in, taking the purse there and slinging it over her shoulder before looking down at her little girl once more. "Yeah, I'm ready," she said, "Marron, Mommy loves you. You be on your best behavior until I get back. Okay baby?" She waited only a moment before she turned and walked out of the room, turning to wait for Tora. It would be good to get out, fresh air and some good food for once. "I hope you brought enough. I can put Saiyans to shame when I'm in the mood."

Tora leaned over and ran his hand through the little girl's hair one more time, staring fiercely at her as if he would will her to wake up. 'Please,' he thought, 'please, please, please wake up, Marron.' He closed his eyes for a moment, pushing down his frustration. "See you later, kid," he said softly and turned to follow Eighteen. "I've seen you eat before. I brought plenty," he assured her with a grin as he led her outside. He swung a long leg over the big bike and offered a hand to her to help her onto it. "I ain't gonna bite."

Eighteen gave him a skeptical look before she took his hand and let him help her get settle on the bike behind him. "Didn't they have any smaller models at the dealership? I think you could store an entire week's worth of emergency food in here, UNcapsulated." She sighed and accepted the helmet he gave her and strapped it on, lightly grabbing hold of his shoulders as she looked around, hoping the bike wouldn't fall over and they both would be crushed. She would hold on tighter, but she wasn't certain in that moment was would be appropriate.

She could have slapped herself as she thought about it, Krillin's voice seemed to take on some of her thoughts. She might as well just hold onto him securely rather than risk flying off and being smashed by the road or the passing cars. Eighteen moved her arms around his waist, and said what she would hope be in a joking tone, "Any jokes about this and I will kill you."

Tora's heart thudded in his chest as Eighteen's slender arms wrapped around his waist, her body pressed up against his back. He shot her a quick grin over his shoulder and wagged his eyebrows. "No promises," he laughed before he swung the bike out into traffic, heading for the highway. He wove in and out of traffic, impressed when he didn't hear her squeal or feel her flinch behind him. "Aww, you're no fun!" he teased. He toned it down once they made it to the city limit and settled back a bit to enjoy the drive.

"You forget the life we lead, it's going to take more than that to get to me," she said, looking around at the scenery as they drove away from the city. It surprised her the way he took them, taking the long route through the wooded areas so that she had a view of the leaves changing their colors. The earth had a rich scent to it, the hint of a cooler day yet to come, a promise that winter would be on its way. She sighed against Tora's back as she thought about how much Marron would love a drive like this. A little picnic with some of her stuffed toys. "You'll have to bring Marron with us next time."

Tora nodded. "I bet she would like this," he answered. He'd driven this route just a few days before, finding an out of the way little blacktop road through the country, thickly surrounded by the trees. He loved the twisting curves and sharp hills as he drove; it kept the ride more interesting. He couldn't stop the smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth as he drank in his surroundings, the beautiful jeweled tones of the changing leaves. He hoped none of the guys found out about his fascination with fall. They'd tease him to no end for it. But it was nice to share that with Eighteen. He finally slowed the bike to a stop next to a large lake surrounded by the woods and turned off the engine. He pulled his helmet off and looked over his shoulder to shoot her a grin. "So what do you think?" he asked proudly, gesturing around at the scenery.

Eighteen finally let go of him and took off her helmet. It was a bit old fashioned to not fly anywhere, but it was good to slow down, especially after all that they had been through. She looked around, taking a deep breath as she inhaled the scent of pine, crisp water and the cool breeze that curled around them. It coaxed a few brilliantly colored leaves from the trees to land on the placid lake. "It's wonderful. How did you find out about this place? Saiyan trade secret?" she asked, her eyebrow raised.

He shrugged. "I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill YOU," he joked as he carefully got off of the bike, making sure he didn't knock her off in the process. He reached into the saddlebags on the bike and withdrew the lunches he'd made and a blanket he'd managed to stuff in the bottom. "Hope you're hungry. I might've made more than I should have," he chuckled and led the way down closer to the edge of the lake before he spread out the blanket and flopped himself down. He reclined back and stretched his legs with a contented sigh. "I could hang out here all day." It was quiet and peaceful without the constant noise he was used to from the city. Something about it just seemed to calm him, to tone down his energy just a little bit. He grabbed one of the sub sandwiches he'd packed and unwrapped it. "Help yourself," he offered as he bit into it.

Eighteen moved to sit on the blanket, letting out a soft sigh as she did as she relaxed back and reached for one of the sandwiches. She felt a little guilty, coming out here to this peaceful place for lunch, while Marron was still back at the stuffy hospital. She could start to see why Goku despised them so. She took a bite, her eyes widening in surprise that it was actually really good. "You made these? Been taking cooking lessons from Sabriena?" She chuckled and tucked into her food. It was so peaceful out there, they were going to have to bring Marron there when she was all better.

He frowned at her. "It's not that hard to put together a sandwich," he muttered, giving her a mock pout at her surprise, but couldn't hold the expression for very long and ruined it by snickering. "Actually, I had to figure out how to make these for myself. I kept blowing all my money by going to those sandwich shops cause I couldn't get enough of them." He reached for another sandwich and quickly devoured it before grabbing up a third. He was ravenous all of a sudden. "Better eat up, sweetpea, before I finish it all off on my own."

Eighteen mockingly glared at him and fished out two more sandwiches and put them behind her, out of his reach. "I didn't think I'd see the day. A Saiyan who loves books, cooking to fend for himself, long bike rides to have picnics. You've really turned a leaf haven't you? Was this was you were thinking would happen, once you escaped from that planet?"

Tora was surprised at the personal question. He couldn't remember her ever asking him something about his life like that before. A bit of a blush touched his nose and cheekbones for just a second at her compliment, too. He leaned on one elbow, looking out at the lake for a moment. "No," he answered honestly. "I came here looking to fight. To conquer, take over the planet with the Atlantians. I was eager for it at first. They made it sound so appealing. Hell, anything would've been appealing at that point," he muttered, a dark look crossing his face. "Thirty something years stuck on that goddamn planet with nothing to do. No one to fight, except for sparring matches with my crew. It's no wonder they all went insane."

Eighteen shuddered at the thought of being stuck on that planet with her husband's murderers. She chewed thoughtfully for a moment, "It's a wonder you turned out the way you did, so different than them. You know, after you learned that you didn't have to follow someone else's orders." She thought back on her own past, how Dr. Gero had planned to use her and her brother as mindless slaves to kill Goku and rule the world. The only thing they wanted was their freedom and would fight for it.

"Ah, but that's just it. I WANTED to follow orders. I didn't want to be the one in charge anymore," he admitted. "Leadership of our crew was meant for Bardock, not me. He was the one who led our missions, who made sure we came home every time. Without him, I didn't know what to do. Not that we had much choice, but still. I remember after we took over that planet and killed off all the inhabitants, when we realized we couldn't make it back. I tried and tried to radio for more fuel to be brought so we could return home. I finally got through, but…" he trailed off and shook his head, his tail thumping against the ground behind him. He'd finally picked up a signal through his scouter just in time to hear Bardock die. A violent shiver shook his large frame and he looked at her. "Sorry."

Eighteen pressed her lips together, watching how defeated he looked at that moment. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up bad memories," she said as she rolled over onto her stomach and looked at him as she ate some chips out of the bag he brought. "Seems our 'family' is full of the worst times, the worst memories. So much hate." She looked at him again, seeing him still lost in past memories, "We could talk about something better. The weather's nice."

"They're not bad memories. It's just been awhile since I really thought on it. Since I talked about it," he answered. He shrugged, "Ah, you're right. We should talk about something else. No one wants to hear all that bullshit. Frieza was a bastard, we all suffered. Blah, blah." He managed a smile for her. "Really? You wanna talk about the weather? Surely you can come up with something better than that." He paused and waited for her to say something before he snickered. "No? Alright then, we'll sit here and stare at each other all afternoon." He fixed his dark brown eyes on her pale blue ones and a small, genuine smile pulled at his lips.

Eighteen snorted and threw a chip at him. It was so odd to have him there. After the outburst she'd had at her brother, they seemed to have come to some unspoken terms between them. "Well, I would ask what's new with you, but you're like Marron's shadow at the hospital. Tough guess there." She hid a small smile of her own as she thought about it, Krillin was still working wonders. He had a proud Saiyan warrior reading children's stories to their little girl. A feat few Saiyans could say they aspired to.

It was true. Tora spent most of his free time at the hospital when he wasn't training with Vegeta. But this was nice, being out here in the bright sunlight with her on a nice day. She looked radiant with the sun shining on her blonde hair, the bright colors of fall surrounding her. It was such a stark contrast to the way she looked in that dim hospital room, the lights kept low around Marron as she rested. A soft chuckle escaped him and he ate the chip she threw at him. He laid down more on his side, tucking his arm under his head as he watched her. Something coiled in his chest, something that made him feel giddy and excited in a way he'd never felt before as he looked at the beautiful woman before him. He'd been feeling that a lot lately. "I bet you never took orders from anyone, huh? You're too independent. Too strong-willed. You're not a soldier like I am. No one ever told you what to do."

Eighteen looked away, towards the water. "You would think that, wouldn't you?" she sighed. "I'm not an android because I wanted to be. You know, with a computer brain and all the gizmos and gadgets. Even with a built in bomb, courtesy of Dr. Gero himself. The man who created my brother and myself. A bomb that was a failsafe should we ever disappoint him. He built us for the sole purpose of defeating Goku, but the moment we became aware of ourselves, we knew we wanted to carve our own path in life. We killed him, but there was always the fear that the bombs inside of us might one day be used to destroy us." She closed her eyes, remembering the selfless wish that Krillin had made that day, saving her and her brother from that fear. "My husband had the bombs wished away so that no one could manipulate us ever again."

Tora listened intently; he'd never heard much about the androids' past. "Your husband was a good man," he said. He looked down, picking at a spot on the blanket for a moment before he looked up at her again. His throat felt a bit dry as he wondered if it was an inappropriate question to ask, but he couldn't stop himself. "I know that you'll never stop loving Krillin. But do you think you'll ever fall in love again?" He swallowed and explained quickly, "I'm not hitting on you, Eighteen. Just curious."

Eighteen blinked down at him, her eyebrow twitching as she wondered if she should slap him but his question was born from innocence. She could almost hear Krillin answering for her, "My husband, Krillin. His only wish for me ever was that I be truly happy in my life." She leaned back and looked up at the sky, wishing she could see his face. "If that means falling in love again, perhaps I will." She looked down at him, giving him a wink and a sly smile, "How would you feel about a three-way on the other side?"

Tora choked at her unexpected question and had to hold up a hand for a moment as he fell into a coughing fit. "WHAT?!" he finally managed, his face burning hot and eyes wide. He felt like an idiot a moment later when she threw her head back and laughed at him. "You are a little shit. Second, I blame Kakarot's mate for putting ideas like that in your head. And third, I guess I deserve that after all the teasing I've done to you." He laid his head back down on his arm and laughed with her. It felt good to enjoy her company like this, to laugh together. He suddenly found himself wishing for many more moments like this with her.

Eighteen laughed at his reaction, "All of those might be true, but I was actually being serious. Sabriena and the other girls, they have a point. A view on the other world with a 'Mother' watching over them, that everyone has a paradise to live in. What I don't understand is if a loved one passes on ahead of another, what does happen if the one still living loves again?"

Tora went quiet for a moment as he thought about it. "I don't know," he answered softly. "I've never given much thought to the afterlife, to be honest. Saiyans don't put much stock in spirituality or gods or what might happen after we die. It wasn't until I came here that I started to read about beliefs and all that. And there's a million different beliefs about what happens after you die. Heaven or Hell, Nirvana, reincarnation, nothing. I don't know what to believe. But, I guess, if there is an afterlife, and a person found themselves with two mates when it's all said and done, I guess you'd just sort it out then." He gave a shrug. "I'm rambling."

Eighteen shook her head, putting her hands behind her head. "It's not rambling if it's meaningful. I'm being honest," she said a little annoyedly. "I love Krillin, the first person in this world to give a damn about my feelings, my happiness. I have no doubt he would want me to be happy again, if that is even possible. I just hope that whatever is in the afterlife, there is no more fighting. That everyone will understand why we did what we had to do, you know?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I can understand that." He narrowed his eyes slightly in consideration of her. "You never cease to surprise me, you know that? I don't think most people give it that kind of thought. At least, from what I've seen here on earth. They all seem to just jump in and out of relationships like it doesn't matter. And they sure as hell don't think about it in terms of the afterlife." He paused for a moment before he reached over and ran the backs of his fingers down her cheek, drawing her eyes to him. "I hope you can be happy again. And if you do decide to fall in love again, whoever it is will be a damn lucky man."

Eighteen couldn't stop herself as she closed her eyes, leaning into Tora's touch. Krillin used to do the same thing. It was almost eerie, but she couldn't bring herself to pull away. Maybe on some level, it was him. She sighed and nodded, "When you've been through what I have, what my brother has. What this 'family' has been through, it just makes more sense to think about things that way. Relationships are meant to be treasured; they mean nothing if we continue on like nothing has happened. You can close a chapter in a book, but you don't forget about it."

A knot formed in Tora's throat at her words. "I know that," he said heavily before he cleared his throat. "I lost the only family I had the day Bardock and Gine died. My parents were killed on a mission when I was young. I had no other family. But Bardock was like a brother to me. I will never forget them. NEVER," he said fiercely. He drew a long breath through his nose to calm himself. He didn't like getting emotional; it was awkward and foreign to him, especially to show that level of emotion in front of another person. "I've never been in love," he admitted with a chuckle. "Don't think there's anyone out there that can put up with me. Don't know why. I'm so nice and quiet and reserved and polite and well-behaved…" he trailed off and laughed deeply at his own lie.

Eighteen gave him a skeptical look.,"Mmmhmm, I'm sure. There's got to be some girl out there for you at the right price." She winked and shrieked when he threw the back of chips at her, "Hey! I have a six year old, I am the grand master of food fights, I'll have you know." Eighteen thought they could continue their conversation, but Tora was looking uncomfortable about the topic. Though, he couldn't run from it forever. "I heard rumors," she said, sobering up, remembering the woman that killed Krillin. "That that bitch Fasha demanded you and the rest of your crew only sleep with her."

Tora sobered then too. "Yeah, she did," he answered. "She had this idea that sleeping with another race was beneath us. That we should keep to our own. Fasha had very strong opinions on how things should be done, everything was black and white with her. No grey areas at all. Durian slept with her a lot. Daikon gave in on occasion, on the full moon on the planet we were stuck on. I almost did at first, but it was just too weird." He shook his head, frowning at the thought.

Eighteen blinked over at him, "You never slept with her? Not even once?"

"Not once," he answered. He smirked at the memory of the Atlantians' camp. "You should'a seen the look on her face when I slept with those Atlantian women. I thought her head was going to explode. She was furious at me."

Eighteen smirked at the thought. "If only it would have," she said before she sighed. "You're alright, I suppose. I mean, taking me out for lunch, telling me about past exploits. I'd tell you about mine, but anything before I was turned into an android was stolen from me. Gone for good," she said, remembering Krillin asking her on one occasion if there had been anyone else. He had told her about Marion, but she didn't have to worry about that airhead, she was certain.

"That's too bad. I bet you had some interesting stories," he teased. He wagged his eyebrows suggestively at her. "Wanna make some new ones?" He laughed when she slapped his shoulder and he laid back on the blanket like her, tucking his arms behind his head to look up at the bright blue sky. He edged a little closer to her and heaved a contented sigh. A mischievous smirk tugged at his lips as he snaked his tail over towards her and poked her in the side with it, making her jump.

The android shook her head at him and reached out, catching it with her lightning fast reflexes. "You know, I've heard talk that losing one of these is the most painful, embarrassing things that can happen to a proud Saiyan warrior," she said, giving it a light tug and laughed at the blush that appeared on his face before she let go of the writhing appendage. "I can see how those can be fun. Sabriena and Tien need to convince Goku to bring his tail back."

Oh dear gods above, help him. He turned his face away, biting his lower lip as his face screwed up, willing his body to calm from her touch. He wanted her to do it again. He was almost grateful for the restrictive leather pants he wore as his length stirred. He scrubbed at his face with his hand before he turned his head towards her again. "Damn you," he growled. His face was still hot, his breathing uneven. Oh, how he wanted to roll on top of her and have his way with her right then, right there in the open sunlight until they were both blissfully exhausted. "If you know so much about tails, you should know better than to grab one like that."

Eighteen looked down at the tail slowly before she gave him a sly look. "Oh, I know all about Saiyan anatomy. I was designed to kill Goku. I know all of his weak points. Considering you now have a case of 'blue balls,' consider this a step towards us being even." She winked at him devilishly and reached over to grab another sandwich, eating it defiantly in front of him.

A low, rumbling growl issued from his throat. His heart felt like it was going to bruise his ribs, it was beating so hard, and his throat felt tight. "Damn you," he repeated and shifted uncomfortably as he tried to will his erection to subside. He rolled to his side, dangerously close to her now, looking down at her as she munched on the sandwich. He slid his hand across the flat plane of her stomach and curled his fingers around her hip. "You could help me out with this little problem you caused, you know." He didn't know where this daring impulse had come from, he was practically begging to get slapped at this point, but he didn't care. Damn it all to hell, he wanted her.

Eighteen chuckled, "Or I could eat this sandwich in front of you and you could help yourself out. More entertaining for me that way. Dinner and a show." She mimicked his own movement, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively as she reclined back on the cloth and watched him. She even waved a hand in his direction, "Go on then. Make it a good one." She didn't know why, but this was doing something, mending some wound in her soul that she needed. That she had some control over the situation, unlike with Krillin's death. She remembered her husband on the bed, surrounded by candles and rose petals. Horribly cliche but she loved it. He had danced to some tasteful music, baring himself to her inch by inch. She shook the memory from her mind. "This is your atonement," she breathed, looking at him with her intense eyes.

"Are you serious?" he asked, disbelief all over his face. Oh, but the way her eyes bored into him made him tremble under her gaze. His length hardened painfully, demanding attention. He hadn't planned this. Their picnic wasn't supposed to turn out like this. But damned if he wasn't happy about the way things were going. He swallowed and licked his lips as his hand went to his belt, unbuckling it as he leaned over her a bit more, his face mere inches from hers. "Can I at least kiss you?" he whispered.

Eighteen considered him for a moment. She hadn't felt on fire like this since this night before the battle. Krillin had made love to her in a way she'd never forget. She had been, up until that point, certain that she would never forget it. Something in her resounded that this was part of her healing process. To watch this man give up something, the way Krillin had. She looked at him, tilting her head. It wasn't him she was mad at. It was Fasha. And if him consorting with another species was a huge stick up her ass, then Eighteen wanted to be that stick. She nodded at the Saiyan and leaned in, her lips centimeters from his when she heard a familiar tune buzzing in her back pocket.

Tora groaned and flopped back on the blanket as Eighteen went for her phone. Damn it all to hell. He'd been so close. SO CLOSE. He closed his eyes, his cock still throbbing, and decided to wait until her phonecall was over. He looked at her curiously when she gasped and bolted upright. "What is it?" he asked, concerned.

Eighteen's eyes went wide, tears gathered and slipped down her face as she promised the hospital she would be right there. She looked at Tora, all thoughts gone except for the one. "Marron is awake."