Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. I am in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise, I just use their creations to have my wicked way with them. No copyright infringement is intended.
LadySharkey1 rocks my world by being the most amazing, kick-ass beta I could ever imagine.
Chapter 32
On an island in the sun...
"Oh, my gosh, Daddy, look! I can see the island!"
I was pretty sure the whole airplane was awake by the time my daughter had spotted the island of Oahu, the final destination of our flight. But even if some of our fellow travelers looked a little less than amused by her enthusiasm, most of the people on the plane were actually smiling.
Which was more than could be said for me.
I'd never really been what you could call a world traveler. Hell, so far the only real trips I'd made were the road trips my parents had taken me on during summer breaks and the short visits to my mom's family near Seattle.
And all those had been by car.
I'd never felt more provincial than the moment that I, Bella Swan, found myself in an airplane for the first time at the ripe old age of twenty-seven. About twenty minutes later, though, I wish I could turn the clock back to the moment I decided to aspire to more than just my small town nature and book a trip that would take me high up in the sky in a flimsy tin canister for a whopping six hours and smack some sense into myself.
I really didn't like flying.
The taxiing part hadn't been so bad. It was actually quite exciting to see the plane push back from the gate and slowly make its way towards the runway. Well, as far as I could actually see it because of a very exited Charlie had been glued to the window ever since she'd taken her seat.
It had all gone downhill the minute the plane had started to accelerate and by the time the 'fasten seatbelt' sign had been turned off, I'd been more than happy to switch seats with a very amused Edward. Anything to be as far away from the window and the frightening vista behind the thin sheet of glass.
And the worst thing about it was that I was the only one.
All around me people were having fun. Hell, as far as Charlie and Edward were concerned, this was the best thing that had ever happened in their lives! All I could focus on, though, were the much too slowly dwindling numbers on the 'time to destination' clock.
Five hours and fifty minutes had never gone by so slowly.
"What's wrong, Bella?" Edward asked, apparently only noticing how completely freaked out I was about four and a half hours into our flight. Not that I could blame him, though. With Charlie sitting next to me, I would have been too busy to notice anything else as well. "Are you okay?"
I nodded, though I was convinced I wasn't kidding anyone. "I will be once we're back on solid ground."
Worried, his brows started to pull into a frown as he peeked at me with his doctor's gaze. "Are you feeling alright? Any nausea?"
"No." I shook my head, my fingernails digging into the armrests. "Just me being afraid. But never mind me, go have fun with Charlie while I contemplate my own mortality and try to watch a movie or something."
I did just that, though I found that closing my eyes while the distraction of whatever movie I'd selected kept my ears sufficiently occupied, I could almost fool myself into thinking I wasn't high up in the air but nice and safe in my own living room.
I sighed, letting my thoughts transport me back to the last couple of weeks as I tried to get my wound up body to relax.
Ever since my argument with Rose, things had been great. Following our discussion, Rose and I had talked things over. While she and Edward would probably never be friends, I was pretty sure that after we talked, Rose understood where I was coming from. She wouldn't be trying to stop whatever was happening between me and Edward any longer even though she still couldn't understand why my feelings for him had sparked back up.
I didn't think she ever would and, while it pained me to know that they would never be friends, I had to grow to accept it. What I did make very clear to her, however, was that if she wanted to remain my friend, she would have to make a serious attitude adjustment. I needed to know that she wasn't going to rain on my parade every time I shared something good about my relationship with him.
And Edward...
He had been ecstatic when I told him we were going to take him up on his offer. He'd planned the whole thing, showing me pictures of the suite he'd arranged to make sure I knew that Charlie and I were going to have our own room and that the hotel offered more than enough amenities to make sure we would be entertained while he spent his days listening to all sorts of lectures.
I'd been overwhelmed, both by the idea of finally taking a break from Forks and work and the fact that he was so incredibly happy about it all. It put a pressure on me to actually make good on his expectations that, at first, I struggled a little with.
In the end, the solution had been easy: talk about it.
After voicing my concerns and finding out that Edward just hadn't realized he was kind of freaking me out with his fussing, things had soon gone back to normal and I could start prepping for the trip without having to worry what dreams Edward might have had in his head. It made me wish we'd done that a long time ago.
How much hurt might have been prevented if only we'd just acted like the grownups we were claiming to be?
How much time might not have been wasted?
My own failure of a personal life proved to be a better distraction than the movie because, before I knew it, the plane touched down at Honolulu International Airport. I could already see that we were in a completely different world. From the crisp, clean shine of the sun in a cloudless sky to the vibrant blue-green of the ocean surrounding us, the scenery couldn't be more different from the ominous gray clouds and almost nuclear green of the trees we'd left behind.
"We're not in Washington anymore, huh?" Edward whispered in my ear as the plane taxied towards the gate.
"Nope." I grinned, the excitement that had been steadily growing over the past couple of weeks was so strong it almost erupted. In fact, it almost made me wish I was Charlie's age again. It would have made jumping up and down in my seat, like her, more appropriate.
Knowing, however, that such behavior in a grown woman was commonly frowned upon, I cleared my throat, summoning what self-control I had as I asked, "Are you looking forward to your week here? I mean, you'll be on the clock for most of it." The hospital had been very generous in allowing Edward three more days off to spend with his family after his obligations at the conference had come to an end. They probably knew as well as I did, how much he'd earned those days over the past couple of months. And even if they didn't, there wasn't a doubt in my mind that his father would have been able to pull the strings necessary to remind them.
"It's exciting," he explained, "even if I don't get to lounge by the pool all day or take diving lessons like Charlie. Over the past couple of months—years even when you add my internship—I've really missed following classes and learning about new techniques and developments in medicine outside the operating room. And some of the speakers at this conference are the best in their fields."
"So I don't have to feel sorry for you?" I smiled, rising with the other travelers as the fastened seatbelt sign was switched off.
"No way!" Edward chuckled, helping Charlie out of her seat as I handed them the stuff from the overhead compartment. "Though I wouldn't exactly mind if you'd take some time out of your busy sunbathing schedule every day to bring me one of those fruity cocktails you'll be drinking every once in a while! Sharing is caring, after all." He smiled.
"I'm willing to bet that would be frowned upon!" I snorted as the line of people stuffed into the aisle slowly started to move towards the door, us moving along with them with Charlie safely tucked between us. "And I don't want a room full of angry doctors on my tail."
"Fair enough!" he fake-pouted, grabbing Charlie's hand protectively as we exited the plane. "Just drink one for me, then."
I snickered, slinging my carry-on bag over my shoulder. "Believe me, I will."
After we'd solved the pesky matter of expectations and how they could freak a person out, we'd been having a lot of fun planning all sorts of things for our trip. Mostly we just suggested fun stuff for Charlie to do during the day since Edward would be attending the conference and I planned on doing absolutely nothing while I was in Hawaii. Between the three of us, we'd packed her days so full of adventures and exciting things to learn that I was getting tired only thinking about it.
Not Charlie, though. She could hardly wait, telling her hamster all about the stuff she would be doing while he sat at home, pining for her and probably counting the days until she'd be back, like good hamsters do.
After collecting our luggage, we were picked up from the airport by a car service that drove us to the most magnificent place on earth my eyes had ever set sight upon. True, I might not have been a hardened world traveler but I had a hard time imagining anyone who wouldn't gasp at the sight of a luxury tropical resort, nestled in a perfect spot between the deep turquoise sea in front of it and the bright green, tree covered slopes stretching out behind it.
"Is that our hotel?" Charlie shrieked, almost leaping over me to get to the window. "It's so cool!"
"I hope it will be." Edward smiled as the car pulled up in front of the main lobby where we checked in and were shown to our room.
Well, room was a small word for something that could definitely rival my apartment back home in size.
"Edward…" I started to argue, only to be shushed quite fiercely by the man himself.
"Just let me do this without complaining, okay?" he pleaded. "The past year has asked a lot from all of us, so if there's anyone who deserves this break, it's the three of us. And since my dad is forking out most of the additional costs to what the hospital covers for my traveling expenses, we should just see this as damage pay anyway."
I sighed still not really happy with the idea of what this miniature palace might have cost but caring a little less since I knew who was forking over the money. After all, Carlisle had a hell of a lot to make good on. "I suppose I can manage that."
"Good." Edward grinned, catching Charlie as she vaulted off the sofa into his arms. "Now let's get changed for dinner; I'm starving!"
We managed to find a spot at the seaside restaurant; the gentle waves and sounds of distant seagulls accompanying us as we stuffed ourselves with fresh seafood before taking a stroll along the beach until Charlie got too tired from running around and playing in the sand.
It was perfect.
We were in paradise.
"I'm so glad you talked me into this." Sighing happily, I took in a huge gulp of fresh sea air as I joined him on our balcony after putting Charlie in her bed and quickly changing my sundress for pajama pants and a light sweater.
He smiled widely, pouring me a glass of wine as I settled in on one of the seats. "I'm glad you think so because…well, I'm psyched at having the two of you here with me."
"I'm happy to be here too, Edward. Thanks so much for wanting us here with you." I sighed, feeling my body relax as I sagged deeper into my seat. It had been so hard to let go of my responsibilities back home that even that morning, I had trouble tearing myself away from my bakery. So much trouble, in fact, that Emmett and Rose almost had to manhandle me out of the door to get me to join Edward and Charlie in the car. "I never knew it could feel so right to take a break from my normal, everyday life once in a while." I smiled, though feeling a little bit overwhelmed by the way the atmosphere had shifted between the two of us. It was exciting on one hand; knowing that no matter what had happened between us, that spark was still there, waiting to kindle into something more. On the other hand, though, I was scared to death of what might happen.
Even if in the end it would be inevitable.
Though more and more I was beginning to realize that we could hurt each other beyond the point of no return but we could never deny that in the end, we were just meant to be.
Be that as it may, though, it still felt like a huge risk and one I wasn't quite sure I was ready to take yet. Luckily, Edward seemed to understand, judging by his eagerness to change the subject when the air around us threatened to get heavier than either of us could lift. "So…what's on the menu for tomorrow? Oh, wait, let me guess…reading by the pool?"
I chuckled. "Pretty much." I sighed happily, taking a sip from my wine. "I'm dropping Charlie off at the dock for her snorkeling lesson first, but after that, my day will pretty much be spent lounging around, enjoying all the books I never found time to read at home. How about you? What interesting lectures are on the menu for tomorrow?"
Breathing out, he smiled as he launched into an account of a day filled with speakers talking about body parts I never even knew I had and workshops involving computers and cameras worming into crevices that seemed completely inaccessible to the naked, untrained eye. But where my mind was completely boggled by the things he was describing, my mind skipped a beat at the way he described them; so passionate and strong it made my heart leap.
"Looks like you might have chosen the right profession after all," I mused as he finished his account. "Listening to you just now, I hate to admit it but maybe Carlisle had a point after all."
"He went about it in completely the wrong way!" Edward stated. "But yeah…there've been times when I hated it, and there've been times when I just hated to admit it but being a doctor really is what I'm supposed to be. The funny thing is, though, that I only realized that a couple of weeks ago."
"And before that?" I wanted to know, playing with the rim of my glass.
He shrugged, taking a sip from his glass. "I was still resisting it, I suppose. I only went with my dad's plan because I saw it as my ticket out of Forks—and I was fucking desperate to get away from there at that point!" He paused, the silence hanging heavily between us as we both traveled back to that time in our minds. "I didn't really dislike college or medical school even. It was just that I only found my passion for practicing medicine when I could really do it…I mean, actually treat patients and be as sure of my assessments of them as my superiors were. And it was only when I found that, that I realized how fascinated I'd become by the inner workings of the human body and the ways I could cure it."
I nodded. "And beside that, I think you finally found your balance," I suggested. "I could see it in you: that strain you were under all the time when you first came back to Forks was gone. Sure, you'd still be tired as hell as you came home from working a shift but that defeated, dead look in your eyes was gone. You were enjoying yourself again and…and it was good to see, even during the times when I pretty much hated you."
"You're right," he admitted, deftly skipping over the harder aspects of the past couple of months. "I did find an easier way to combine all the important things in my life. And, on top of that, it's been good to be back. I never knew how much I missed it until I was able to finally be the dad Charlie needs. I can't tell you how good that has been for me."
"For her as well," I answered, smiling at him. "She's been so happy to have you with us and, for me, it's been good as well, to have someone to share the responsibility with. I mean, it's not like you weren't there before, but…"
"There's only so much I could do over the phone," Edward finished for me.
"Yeah."
Edward chuckled, explaining his mirth only when he caught my gaze. "Aren't we the lucky ones?"
I chuckled, knowing that the road to our present happiness was paved with pain. There and then, though, in the receding light of the tropical sun, it was pretty hard to come to any other conclusion.
We were the lucky ones.
Thoughts?