[A/N: Okay, I'm back! These update patterns of mine are weird, but after reading a lovable/hatable fanfic by Forever Dreamland - Coming Closer I was simply inspired to write more. You should check it out!]
How to live with Werewolves.
Rule Number Ten:
Taking a thorn out of a wolfs paw is kind of like sealing your fate. Be gentle.
Last time:
"You really are a package deal of crazy, little one" Embry says, ruffling my hair.
Jacob stares at me coolly and I can't tell what he's feeling because he wears a thin veil of Sam's look. The one I always hated. I don't hate it anymore, but it still makes me wary.
"We'll always be here for you, Bells" he says, reading my expression.
I nod and reach forward, hugging him tightly to me and ignoring the feeling of my heart beating wildly against my ribs. I'm sure he can feel it too.
~!~
Leah is wearing a denim skirt and a tight fitting top, making her hourglass figure seem more wonderful then before and standing beside her, I feel like a thorn compared to a rose. Black sweatpants and a white singlet with ballet shoes and a brown jacket doesn't exactly come close to how she looks. She watches as the males of the house stuff their faces, Emily dashing here and there, cooking and cleaning at the same time. I feel like I should help but the look on her face says she'd rather do it alone.
And I get that feeling sometimes.
They'd just come back from a patrol. Embry and Quil changed shift with Paul and Jared.
Seth, Sam and Jacob were in a deep discussion about Victorias patterns, but as soon as the food hit the table, they practically leapt onto it. Seth doesn't bite though, just watches. I notice Leah hasn't eaten anything, and I stand back, offering her the only available seat.
"Eat," I tell her, softly laying a palm on her shoulder and she sighs gruffly, mumbles something and then takes a seat, not a moment later does she fork some of the scrambled egg into her mouth.
Emily sends me a grateful smile as the others stare at me incredulously.
"Dude, I swear she's like a God or something. Snaps her fingers and we all jump," Quil uttered, shaking his head.
Embry laughs, slaps him heartily on the back. "Oh come on man, Claire can wait for you. Besides, it's not even three o clock yet!"
The room is filled with the sound of people eating and Emily humming softly. I stand near the staircase, playing with the hem of my jacket, hood covering my forehead when the sound of a long piercing howl reaches my ears, making me jump. Several things happen at once-they all stand, trembling and Sam booms out orders, fingers pointing in each of their direction. "Leah, Seth, stay here and protect Bella and Emily. Quil, Embry, follow me. Jacob, you know what to do."
Then just like that the house is nearly empty and there's only the four of us left. Emily is clutching a wooden spoon and when a second howl echoes around us, she snaps it in half and closes her eyes tightly.
Leah looks betrayed, but quickly runs outside as Seth paces, a low keening noise rumbling in his chest.
"Leah!" he cries when she steps out and the same popping noise fills my ears, signalling her change.
She sits on the porch, her head almost touching the roof and she stares out into the forest, growling lowly.
Seth continues pacing and I have this hollow feeling in my chest, like a part of me is missing. And I think to myself that missing part is Jacob.
We wait. Seth shifted long after the food had gone cold and two wolves sit outside, eyes wary and body rigid with tension. I bite my nails absentmindedly and pray to whatever higher power there is that everything's alright. The suns setting low in the distance, disappearing behind the trees and I hear the faint noise of snoring. Leah's eyes are closed.
I walk to the porch, shove a plate of cold bacon towards Seth. He hadn't eaten from what I remembered, and he turned his head away from it. But his eyes shifted to the food, then back to the forest.
"Please eat something." I beg, picking up a piece and holding it out to him.
He whines, and that stirs Leah from her slumber. She takes a look at me with a small tilt of her head, growls softly, then goes back to sleep.
Seth's eyes seem to narrow at her and without warning he takes a bite of the bacon from my hand gulping down the rest of it in a big snap of his jaw. He licks his lips and then licks my fingers when the plates been wiped clean. He rests his head on my thigh and I stroke the top of his head softly, listening to Emily vacuum down the hall.
We wait. Because that's all we can do.
It's nearly midnight. My eyelids are falling closed and Seth's head is warm against the material of my sweatpants. My back is pressed against the house, as Seth lays on his side, head cradled in my lap. He's bigger then me, way bigger, and it's awkward but comforting. Leah's ears twitch while she sleeps and her foot moves. I think she's having a dream when suddenly, simultaneously both of them jump up, growling, snarling, whining and then it hits me.
The pain is unbearable.
In the dim part of my mind I can hear Emily crying out.
She must feel it too.
It starts in my chest, spreading wider until I can't feel my fingertips and I'm gasping for air as a ear-shattering howl sounds around me, echoing hollowly. I can hear more howls, then Emily screams "SAM!" and my gut drops. I can feel it, the pain, but it must be worse for someone else, I think.
The connection. A live wire to the imprints. If the wolfs feel pain, we must feel it too.
I'm crying, I realize as I wipe the hair away from my face, trying to see clearly, but it hurts too much.
And then there's voices.
"Someone get me a towel! Move!" a voice shouts and I lift my head with whatever strength I have to look into the broken eyes of two wolves; Leah and Seth. Jared and Embry come in first, cradling legs. Then a torso carried by Paul and-
"Jacob" I breath, coming to a stand and leaning my weight against the house. His eyes catch mine but his focus is intense, set on the bleeding man in his arms.
Bleeding?
Oh no. God, no.
Glass shatters inside and I move, pushing the screen door open. They place Sam on the table, all the plates and cups pushed to the floor. Blood is fresh across his stomach, down his legs. Someone has covered his lower half with a towel. I can't tell where the damage is from.
Emily is sobbing his name, holding his face in her hands and begging him to be okay. His eyes focus on hers and he tries to hold her hand and yelps.
"Stop the bleeding," I say, willing myself to be strong. I move to his side, checking for the wound and when I find it my mind goes blank. How could I have missed it?
There's a gaping hole where the flesh between his shoulder and jaw line should be. And as I stare at it, I can see Emily holding the towel there. As she goes to pull it away I find myself gagging. He's healing. The towel is sticking to him, the skin trying to heal over it. "Jesus Christ!" Paul swears, and distantly I can hear voices. People urging him to stay awake. He's screaming.
Your fault…
I swallow audibly.
"Dab it," I tell Emily. "Like you're painting. Dab at it." I repeat.
So useless. He could die because of you… your fault.
Emily is shaking too hard. I tell someone to get her out of here, calm her down and then I set to work, trying to think of it as homework as I run warm water with a teaspoon of salt in it over his wound. He clutches at the table, and the wood creaks under his action.
"Hold his hand," I order Jared and Jared takes Sam's hand without second thought, eyes glassy as he stares at Sam's clenched teeth and pale face. By the time I'm cleaning the blood off of him and go back to picking at the dirt in his wound, I'm sure the urge to vomit has passed. But the pain is still there. Fresh, waiting.
"It's gonna take a longer time to heal…" I say, my voice sounding strong and firm for the first time.
"Then normal." I add "The wound is too deep. Keep running salt water over it. Boil the kettle until it's nearly hot then use Table Salt. Or the crystallized salt."
"What are you going to do?" Quil asks weakly. I look at him, and say "Calm Emily down."
She's in my arms, and I rock her back and forth as she sobs onto my shirt, asking for Sam over and over. I tell her he'll be okay soon. He just needs time to get better. My eyes water but I try to keep them at bay. They need me. She needs me.
"It's okay" I hush her cries as she starts again, a high keening noise in the crook of my neck.
Leah comes into the room, slumps down to the floor. Her hair is a wild mess of raven waves, and her eyes are red and puffy. She's wearing the same denim skirt and top as before, but she seems lifeless now.
"Who are you?" she asks, looking me in the eye.
I feel like she can see straight through me.
"Who are you" she asks again, pauses and then adds "really?"
"Bella Swan."
"But that's the thing" she says, wiping at her face tiredly.
"When wolves imprint, it's a higher power. It chooses the one being who can handle all of this" she gestures to the kitchen "and not manage to end up in a looney bin. I just don't get why you're so… at ease with all of it."
"I'm good with weird."
"But you're no good with pain." she bluntly tells me and sighs, runs her fingers through her hair as she closes her eyes.
"I'm not going to ask you this directly, mainly because you're so fucking fragile it's almost sad, but I'm going to hint at it…" She opened her eyes, looked at me and asked "If he" instantly, my mind knows who she speaks of, just by the way she spits it out like a curse "Hadn't left… Would you have stayed here…?"
I wait a long time before I answer truthfully.
"No."
She nods.
"So what are you doing here now?" it doesn't come out with the bite I was expecting, more of her trying to figure me out.
"Sometimes, I don't know… I keep hurting you all. And right now he" I gesture with my eyes towards the kitchen, knowing Emily will start all over again. "Is in there, like that, because of me. I will never be sorry enough for the pain and trouble I've brought here. But I'm trying my hardest to be a part of this, of you all. Not for the simple fact that Jacob is my…" I sigh on the word "Imprint. More because it was meant to be. I was meant to be…." I finish in a whisper.
Jacob stands in the doorway, I wonder faintly how long he had been standing there, and his eyes are staring into mine. If I thought Leah was looking right through me before, it was nothing compared to this.
"Is she okay?" he asks after he clears his throat.
"Yeah, she's fine…" I look down at Emily weeping silently in my arms, her lips curling around Sam's name like a prayer.
"She just needs him." I say. Her skin is cool to the touch and her face is pale. I remember feeling cold without Jacob, warm with him. Lifeless without. Born again in his presence.
Leah is staring at Emily with something not quite friendly but a hint of concern lays there in her eyes.
"Can you…?" I ask her but she shakes her head.
"We may be family, but no. I can't."
"Yes," I say, half carrying, half helping Emily over to Leah. I place her by Leah's side and instantly, Emily clutches to her, seeking the warmth of Sam through her. "You can."
Leah grits her teeth but holds her close, tears in her eyes.
Together, we walk to the front door, needing fresh air. I take a look at the clean table in the kitchen, look down the hall to where Jared, Seth and Paul stand, eyes worried as they look into the room. Sam must have been moved. Embry and Quil are trying to keep the mood light, betting on what mood Sam would wake up in.
Jacob puts an arm around my waist and it feels so good to be against him, to feel his strength there coiled under russet skin. He sits me on his lap on the deck chair on the grass outside and just holds me, kissing my temple with warm lips. I sigh, content and exhausted.
"What happened out there?" I murmur softly, my voice carried by the small breeze.
"She was too fast." he says slowly, eyes out towards the forest, as if remembering. I suppose he was.
"We almost had her. Paul had just about had another mouthful of her hair when she turned and went to strike. Her lips were so close to his neck that I could feel it through the bloodline. I was too slow, too far away to get to him. She just about had her teeth on the back of his neck when Sam took her from the side, ripping a chunk from her leg. She was pissed. We thought she'd run again, and when we were about to take her down, she turned and…"
He stops, closing his eyes tightly.
"She said one thing before she got him. Before she punched a hole through him." the words fell from his lips in a breath that had been held too long.
"What… what did she say?"
He didn't open his eyes when he said this, but I felt eyes watching me.
Waiting.
"You can't save her," he breathed.
I closed my eyes, held him as he clutched to me tightly.
A part of me knew what she had meant. Another part of me knew this was it.
This was it, I thought with finality.
My fate was sealed.
! [Review Rant] !
RealLifeWolfGirl - I felt really weird about the whole Quil imprinting on a kid. Seriously? It just says some things… But I liked the way SM explained how it was-even though I think it was just an easy way out of writing love. HA! I keed. I am seriously loving the pack-but this chapter I wrote? Hurt like a bitch.
Bripearl - Bella taking charge is what I want! Damn her and her insecurities.
Noin37 - Thank you very, very much. There are a few parts of this fanfic I don't altogether like and would like to fix, but this is taking a lot out of me. But your review gives me strength-Again! Thank you.
I'mAMusicGirl - Here it is!
Jharv241 - As said before, I think Bella should take control over more situations. Looking over what I've written the past three chapters, I'm beginning to think that she's finally waking up and thus making me feel like waking up also!
Preetoaka Raven Potter Weasley - I so didn't count how many times you said Fuckward. (6 times, give or take.) But I totally agree. I got really annoyed at her when she married Fuckward, thus sealing her fate-and I hated how she reacted with Charlie and everyone else! I mean, she's going to live forever and watch them die when being with Jacob would have been easy as breathing! GR! She's so selfish. And she just didn't care! I mean sure, she's got a new family, but what about her real family? Can anyone say WTF? But thank you for your review! It's nice to see some people get my point.
Jwstahle - Hope this perks your interest.
- [ End Rant ] -