Ch 14. Will You Touch Me?
(Clare)
After Mark and Gaea leave Owen and I head inside. "How is Gaea doing?" Danielle asks when we get to the kitchen and see everything being put away. All four of them turn around to look at us.
"She was released tonight but had suffered a minor concussion and a sprained ankle so they kept her there for a while. The police spoke to her and Fitz and then we drove them here so Fitz could pick up his car and take her home. Oh and they are dating now," Owen explains to his family, Maya included.
"You should have invited them in, I feel terrible that she was hurt while at our house," Danielle remarks.
"It wasn't your fault Danielle, it was my mother and step-father who were wrong. And Owen did invite them in but Gaea said her head was bothering her and just wanted to get home," I tell them and Danielle nods. I look around and then begin to help put away things as well although by now there isn't too much left.
"Why don't all you kids head on up to bed, it's been a long day and you 3 have school tomorrow. We can finish cleaning up here," Noah comments and we all smile and say goodnight to each other giving Danielle and Noah hugs and then head upstairs. When Owen and I get up to our room we go in. I think about Owen's plan to help me feel more comfortable, as well as how my mom tried to take me from Owen tonight and this upsets me.
"Owen," I whisper with tears brimming in my eyes, and he turns around and faces me.
"Clare, what's wrong? Are you alright? Did your mom say something else?" he asks looking down at me as he stands in front of me, but all I want right now is be in his arms so I wrap my arms around him and lay my head on his chest. He tightly wraps his arms around me and just holds me silently. I don't know how long we stand hugging, but Owen stays silent until I move my hand to wipe away what's left of my tears and pull away slightly. "Clare?" he questions again.
"Owen, will you do something for me?" I ask nervously and lift my head slowly to look at his face.
"I would do anything for you Clare," he says and then kisses the top of my head.
"Would you? Um, I mean… Owen would you take a bath with me?" I ask and feel silly for being so nervous, and yet this is all new to me.
I see curiousness in Owen's eyes but a pleased grin grows on his face. "I would love to Clare, but are you sure about this? I mean you've been uncomfortable with this type of thing up until now, and we'll both be naked in the bath tub together," he comments and I nod.
"Yes Owen I'm sure. I want to feel close to you, but I'm still not ready for more than this yet," I tell him and he genuinely smiles with his mouth as well as his eyes this time.
"That's okay Clare, I promise this is more than I expected," he says. As the washroom isn't attached to Owen's room Owen grabs pyjamas from his dresser while I grab a housecoat and something from the closet, and then Owen takes my hand and we walk into the washroom together and grab towels on the way. When we get in Owen closes and locks the door and turns on the water putting in the stopper. We watch each other as we slowly undress and then Owen checks the temperature before climbing in. He stays standing and takes my hand and helps me into the tub as well. Owen sits down and then guides me down into the water so I'm sitting between his legs but not against him.
"Is this okay Clare?" he asks once I'm sitting. I nod still facing forward and just enjoy the water for a moment and then as my body relaxes I feel shooting pain in my neck where Glen was holding me, and I begin to rub it hoping to sooth it a little. "Would you like me to rub your neck?" he questions, and I assume it's so I can know he's not pressuring me.
"Yes, thank you Owen," I comment and he begins giving me a soft massage which starts to help and then pain and I wince slightly and I feel Owen pause. "It wasn't you Owen, it's from Glen's hand around my neck, it still hurts," I explain and Owen begins rubbing my neck and shoulders again.
"He won't ever touch you again Clare, I won't ever let them touch you again," Owen growls and I feel his massage getting harder.
"She's my mom Owen, as much as what she's done and has said hurts me she's still my mom. I still love her," I tell him, and then I feel his hands gripping harder now. "Owen, you're hurting me," I tell him, and I feel slight tears in my eyes again.
As soon as what I said registers, Owen let's go immediately. "I'm so sorry Clare. It'sjust the thought of your mom threatening you, blaming you, even touching you is something I don't like. I've seen her anger and I don't want her to be able to hurt you again," he tells me.
"I know Owen and I love how protective you are and that you so badly want to protect me and I sincerely appreciate it, but I need you to be there with me on dealing with my mom, rather than you dealing with her for me," I try to explain.
"Ok, I can try to do that because it's what you want, but it may be tough," he responds and I nod.
"I know and thank you for trying Owen," I smile and then turn around enough to capture his lips with mine.
We pull away and I turn my head back around and then decide to slide back a bit so that I'm leaning on Owen, and then he does what I'd hoped he would and puts his arms around my waist, but he just clasps his fingers together and doesn't take advantage. We sit like that a moment and then I take his hands, and unclasp his fingers. "Clare?" he questions but I don't say anything as I kiss both hands and then move his hands so they cover each of my breasts. I've never felt this before but just like feeling comfort in his arms, this is a comfort of its own and yet feels different and very good.
"Please stay above the waist this time, but will you touch me Owen?" I ask.
"Of course Clare, I love touching you already," he says and I can hear the smile on his lips. He slides his hands down until they are cupping my breasts underneath and then leans down and kisses my neck as he begins massaging not only my breasts but down my torso to my waist and hips, but he does as I asked and stays from my belly button up. I enjoy his hands on my skin and find myself beginning to moan.
I am enjoying Owen's hands and part of me wants more but a larger part is still scared and I worry about continuing so I know I need to stop it now or I may regret it later.
"Owen I am enjoying this and I know you are too but can we please stop?"
"Of course," he says instantly taking his hands off my skin.
"I'm ready to get out now but will you come hold me in bed?"
"All night," he smiles.
I turn to kiss him, feeling his erection poking at me and I feel like I should take care of it. As I kiss him I start to reach my hand down but he grabs it before I touch him.
"I got it, you took a big step tonight and I'm proud of you," Owen smiles and I grin, "go get ready for bed and I will be in shortly and hold you all night."
I smile and kiss him again before getting out of the bath, looking briefly at his erection, both thrilled and a little scared that I made that happen. Wrapping a towel around me I kneel down and kiss him one last time.
"I love you Owen."
"I love you Clare," he smiles softly.
I grab my stuff and leave him in the bath and walk to our room happily anticipating being back in his arms in a few moments.
(Owen)
When I'm finished in the bath I get out and dry off pulling on my boxers and pyjama bottoms and then walking back to my room. I find the lights out when I go in and just the bedside lamp on my side on. But what shocks me after I close the door is when I see Clare and my mouth drops. Since last Saturday night she's always worn a tank top and long pyjama pants set and panties. The first few nights she wore a bra but that stopped soon after. But tonight I see her standing at the foot of the bed waiting for me in a red silk and lace nightie thing and she looks fantastic.
"Do you like your surprise?" she asks softly, and I can tell she's nervous.
It takes me a moment to get over the shock. "You look sensuous and sexy my beautiful wife. I don't think there is anything you can wear that I wouldn't love on you. You took a big step tonight with the bath, are you sure about this?" I question stepping closer.
"I'm sure Owen. I'm in love with you and wanted to surprise you. I'm still scared, but you've been so patient and I wanted to do something, I guess for us both," she tells me and I can't help but smile.
"You certainly did," I remark and then I step up to her and pick her up in my arms. She squeals slightly holding onto the back of my neck and I carry her to our bed and lay her down gently and I'm able to move the covers down. I lean down and kiss her lips, and then I climb in behind her and she snuggles into my chest. I feel warm, despite the cool silk against my skin, but I love the feel of it and her soft curves as I slide my hands down her sides and around her waist. I feel her take my hands with hers and I relish in this slightly more confident Clare as I realize our rings are next to each other and look so special and I just stare for a moment.
"Goodnight Owen, thank you and I love you," she says softly.
"Sweet dreams, my beautiful Clare. I'm so in love with you, and can't tell you how much I love that we are together," I comment and I feel her hands grip a little tighter and she smiles. I kiss the top of her head, and then we both lull to sleep to the sound of our breathing.
(Gaea)
Mark drives to my house from Owen's and I sit with my head resting on his shoulder as I'm still in some pain. When we arrive I don't see any vehicles in the driveway, but that happens sometimes, but my mom usually leaves a note. "Your house is pretty dark did your parents say they were going out?" Mark asks.
"No, but it happens sometimes. They usually leave a note on the counter or the fridge. With my dad's job he sometimes has meetings at odd hours and my mom likes to get out of the house quite often," I tell him. "We can just go in, its fine I have a key," I remark and look at him seeing him nod. So we both get out and walk up the driveway to the door. We go in and I turn on some lights and head into the kitchen looking around for a note.
"Find anything?" Mark questions.
"No, and that's really strange my mom usually always leaves a note of some sort to tell me where she is or when she'll be home," I explain.
"If you'd like, you can stay at my apartment tonight. That way I can wake you up every two hours and if you're up for it I can take you to school in the morning," Mark offers and I smile.
"That's really sweet of you Mark, and yes I would like that if it's really okay. My head is still hurting so I'd like to lie down very soon," I comment.
"Of course it's okay Gaea. You should probably pack a bag quickly and grab anything for school and we'll head over so you can lay down," Mark suggests. I smile, but don't nod and then head upstairs and Mark follows me. I pack a bag, and then go back to the kitchen where Mark suggests writing my family a note I'm staying at a friend's and I'll get a lift to school and then I lock up and we leave.
We arrive at Mark's apartment and go in. "There's one thing I forgot to tell you back at the house. My living room has chairs but no couch. I hope you don't mind sharing my bed. It may make it easier to wake you up every two hours though," he comments and I look at the floor a moment remembering something, but I push it to the back of my mind, and know he's right and just trying to help.
"Ok, the bed is fine, but my head is still bothering me so I'm not up for anything," I remark.
"It's ok Gaea, we only went on our first date today. I'm not the guy I used to be. Why don't you change and I'll get you some water so you can take some pain meds," he comments. Points me toward the bathroom and then goes into the kitchen. I change and take the meds he offers and then we both climb into Mark's bed on either side. Mark says his prayers, and then kisses me goodnight and I do enjoy the sweet quick kiss he gives me. "Goodnight Gaea, I hope you get a good sleep, despite me having to wake you up every two hours," he says and smiles.
I laugh slightly and then realize something. "Mark, if you have to wake me up every two hours won't that mean your sleep will be interrupted? Won't that be bad for having to work tomorrow? Especially if you're driving me to school," I worry I'm putting him out.
"Gaea, it's alright. I can go right back to sleep after I wake you. I can usually get to sleep right away, and I'm happy to drive you to school tomorrow. Besides, I don't start work until 2 tomorrow so I can come back and sleep a few more hours after I drop you off," he tells me.
"Ok, I'm glad it won't bother you, and thanks for all this," I comment. "Goodnight Mark," I smile leaning over to kiss him once more. I get comfortable and close my eyes but I can't sleep. Very soon I hear Mark's breathing even out as he gets to sleep but my mind just races, first about Mark and then it goes into my past.
"Gaea, Gaea wake up," Mark calls as he gently shakes my arms. "Gaea," he adds again. And I wake up startled and my eyes shoot open. "Are you alright? You were screaming. Is it your head?" he questions as I attempt to calm my breathing. He wipes away a few tears from my cheeks and kisses my forehead.
"Nightmare," I whisper. "But now my head hurts again. I guess the screaming bothered it," I comment quietly.
"You want to tell me about it?" Mark questions but I shake my head. "Okay, well it's too soon for you to take more pain relievers. Is there something I can do? Technically you didn't need to be woken up for about half an hour, but now you can sleep 2 hours before I wake you up again," he tells me and I look at the clock.
"Would you be able to rub my back a little?" I ask softly and slightly nervously, but I trust Mark.
"Of course Gaea, why don't you turn over and sit up a bit," he remarks and I do. He softly rubs my back and shoulders and I calm down enjoying him touching me and helping me begin falling back to sleep, and hopefully this time my mind remains on him completely.
"Thank you that really did help," I comment and then yawn.
"You should probably try to get back to sleep," Mark responds.
"I'd like that, but will you do one more thing for me?" I ask cautiously and Mark looks at me expectantly so I continue. "Will you hold me Mark?" I question.
All he does is smile, laying down and then stretching his arm out across the bed. I smile back and crawl back under the covers and lay my head on his arm and he wraps his other arm around me before we both fall asleep again.
"Gaea you need to get up to get to school if you feel up to it," Mark comments the next morning shaking my arm gently. Every two hours through the night once we got back to sleep he kept his word and woke me up. I open my eyes and I've still got my head on Mark's arm underneath me. I lift up and smile at him. "You can stay here for the day if you're feeling too bad," he remarks.
"Thank you for the offer, but I'm ok to go to school. But I'll take the pain meds just in case," I respond and then lean over and kiss his lips quickly. "You are so wonderful to let me stay last night."
"It was no problem and I was happy to have you, especially since your family wasn't home. I start work at 2 but if you want to walk over to the Dot after school I can drive you home on my break," he offers. "You're not allowed to drive for a few days."
"I know, and actually I haven't gotten my driver's license here anyway, but sure that sounds good. I will have to actually go home and see where my family was yesterday," I comment.
"Of course," Mark remarks, and then we both get up, I get ready for school then Mark drives me to school pulling up right at the front steps. "I'll see you later gorgious, and be careful of your head. Don't overdo it," he reminds me and I nod. I do appreciate how caring he is. It's a bit of a change from the past. He leans over and captures my lips, and this kiss continues, especially after I move closer putting my hand behind his neck. I melt into the kiss and don't pull away until a ball hits the window and scares us both, and then we laugh at the expression the kid has as he grabs his ball from by the car. Probably because he sees Mark, and then runs off before Mark even reacts. "Enjoy your day and I'll see you later," he comments and attaches his lips to mine once more, and then I pull away and climb out of the car waving as he drives home.
I head inside to my locker and then I hear someone approaching and see that it's Clare. "Morning Gaea. I just wanted to apologize for my mom and step-dad. He had no right to touch you and I'm sorry for bringing you into my problems," she comments without taking a breath. "How is your head this morning?"
"Hi Clare, and it's okay, it wasn't your fault. You're my friend, and I was enjoying your reception. I certainly didn't want them to take or hurt you. And my head is alright at the moment but that could change," I comment closing my locker and then look down noticing that she isn't wearing her ring. "Still no news on your name change?" I ask quietly.
"No the mail doesn't come until the afternoon and we only filed it on Friday so it may be another few days, but Owen has already promised to let me know when it arrives and we'll start wearing our rings in public and be open about it with people," she answers as an announcement comes over the PA system.
"Will Gaea Kessler and Clare Edwards please come to Principal Simpson's office," the voice announced and a few of the other kids in the hall ooo as we look at each other and then head to the office. We arrive and the secretary points us in.
"Hello girls," greets Mr. Simpson and we both smile. "Gaea, after what happened last night I wanted to see how you were doing and if the doctor said anything regarding school," he remarks.
"Well I was told I suffered a minor concussion, and sprained my ankle, although it is doing better. I also have pain meds for if my head hurts, and I was told to take it easy, but I wasn't told I had to stay home. I'll be careful, but I'm not really sure how the bells and school work will affect it, never been through this before," I comment.
"Alright, well if you feel dizzy, nauseous or you're in too much pain, have someone help you down here to the office and you can go home," Mr. Simpson tells me and I smile again.
"Yes Sir," I respond.
"Clare I called you both down because I also wanted to check on you after everything with your mom, and I want you and Owen to know you have our support if you need it. I also took your mom and step-dad off the school grounds acceptance list so they can't step on to the property," Mr. Simpson explains.
"Thank you, sir. I know Owen and I both really appreciate everything you've done for us. But we are still waiting on approval of my name change before we tell anyone about us. Anyway, my wrist hurts some, but my neck is feeling better today sir. And I'm alright, I know I have a lot of support," I comment.
"Yes, and Owen is allowed on school grounds whenever he likes, although he can't just remove you from class. But if you'd like to meet for lunch or such its fine," Mr. Simpson comments, and we both smile, and then I look at Clare, and I think she knows what I'm thinking.
"Mr. Simpson, there's just one more thing," Clare begins. "I know after Vegas night Mark was banned from school property…," Clare gets to but is interrupted by Mr. Simpson.
"Mark?" he questions and appears confused.
"I mean Fitz," she explains and he nods for her to continue. "But is there any way he could get permission to be on school property again?" she questions, but doesn't yet go into detail.
"Why would he need to be on school property, he's no longer a student here," Mr. Simpson responds.
"He's not, but Gaea is," Clare remarks with a smile.
Mr. Simpson turns to face me again. "Last night when I was in the hospital he asked me to be his girlfriend. We had our first date yesterday afternoon, and when my parents weren't home last night, he let me stay at his apartment because someone had to wake me up every two hours, and he was kind enough to do it," I explain.
"I'm happy for you Gaea, but with his past I don't know if we can let him on school grounds girls," Mr. Simpson acknowledges.
"He has changed sir. He has a job at the Dot, and is really a good guy. You saw last night," Clare attempts to convince him. "Maybe if he could only come onto school grounds if he comes with Owen so we all can spend lunch together," Clare tries. "It could allow these two to have time together and show everyone that Mark, and Owen aren't the same guys they were on Vegas night," she explains, and now I need to ask them all about what happened on Vegas night.
"Alright Clare, I see what you mean, and yes both Owen and Fitz have changed a lot in those two years. I will give permission for Fitz to come here on lunches, but only if he arrives and leaves with Owen and the four of you are together. I'm trusting you both, please don't abuse that," he concedes, and I know we're both grinning very big.
"We promise sir," we both answer at the same time and then we all begin laughing, and then Mr. Simpson excuses us from his office. We leave rushing off to English. For most of class we just have to sit and listen today which doesn't bother my head, but then after morning break I have music with Adam.
"Are you going to be okay in here?" Adam asks when I come in and sit down next to him. "I know the fall you took when you were pushed caused a minor concussion," he comments.
"I'm okay at the moment, but it'll probably depend on whether today is a history, theory or playing day," I remark as the teacher walks in. It turns out today is a playing day and it doesn't take long for the loud noise to bother me. I grab my bottle of water for lunch and take some of my pain medication, but it just becomes too much, so Adam asks the teacher if he can take me to the nurse to lie down. She looks at me, and then agrees, I guess I'm not looking the greatest.
We get out into the hall and begin walking down the hall. We get to the nurse and Adam explains the situation, and she lets me lie down. "Maybe you should just go home," Adam suggests, and I think about it for a moment, but realize that I wanted to talk to Clare at lunch before I spend too much time with Mark. Mark seems great but there's a side of me that is scared to get too close and yet I like his hugs and enjoy his touch, even if it's just hand holding.
"No, I need to talk to Clare in private at lunch. And besides, I think it was just the loud music in class that bothered my head, it's not as bad now," I comment, but he gives me a look like he doesn't quite believe me. "I mean it Adam," I tell him.
"Ok, well I should get back to class, but maybe you should talk to Mr. Simpson about sitting out of music for the next few days," he suggests, and I smile.
"Alright Adam, I will, I promise," I assure him. He gives me one final look and then leaves walking back to class I assume. I stay on the couch in the nurse's office until the end of the period. My head is feeling some better and I am getting hungry, and I decide to go see Mr. Simpson now.
I get to the office and the secretary says I can go in. "Mr. Simpson," I announce knocking on his door lightly, and he waves me in.
"What can I do for you Gaea?" he asks as I sit.
"Well I just spent most of music class lying down in the nurse's office because the loud music was bothering my head. Even after taking my pain pills. It's gotten better since then, and neither of my other classes include loud noises so I think I'll be okay, but I was wondering about sitting out of music class the next few days until I feel I can take the noise again," I try to explain.
"I'm glad you went to see the nurse Gaea, and you're feeling better now. I can speak to your teacher and get you excused from class for this week, but if there are assignments or tests in the history or theory sections you'll have to make them up," he reminds me and I thank him. "Are you sure you don't want to get a ride home now?" he asks.
"I'm sure sir, plus I need to speak to Clare," I tell him. He nods and then I head out to search for Clare, who I find eating lunch alone in the JT Yorke memorial garden. "Hey Clare," I comment closing the door and then sitting next to her.
"Hey hun, Adam told me you had to go the nurse," she comments as I pull out my lunch.
"Ya, but it had to do with the loud noise in music class bothering my head. But I spoke with Mr. Simpson about it and my head is feeling better now, so I'm gonna stick around. Plus I wanted to talk to you anyway," I tell her.
"I'm glad you're feeling better. So what did you want to talk about?" she asks.
"Um, can you promise to keep this to yourself? I haven't really told anyone, except when I had to where I used to live, and I don't want this getting out. I do trust you and I would like to believe you can trust me too," I comment as my voice gets softer.
"I trusted you as one of the people to know about Owen and I, and I promise this will stay between us," Clare tells me and I smile before I take a deep breath and begin to speak.