I'm sorry about the delay guys. I forgot what day it was and went to bed super early (for me) last night, but here it is I hope you enjoy it. And I hope my Canadian readers have a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend!

Ch. 17 Changing Relationships

(Bianca)

After leaving Owen and Clare's new apartment, as I can't refer to it as mine because I never actually lived there, I drive back to my aunt's apartment but she isn't home. Thinking about Clare and Owen means not only am I worried with Clare having gotten sick earlier and what might have caused that, but it gets me thinking about Drew and I and this is something I know I'll have to deal with at some point, but I'm still having trouble facing Drew. Even while moving boxes I attempted to keep my distance. But right now it's Saturday afternoon, I'm bored and thinking about Drew is troublesome. I know Owen is busy with Clare and Fitz and I haven't really reconnected all that much except as Clare and Owen's friends and I know he has a new girlfriend so I try to think of someone I can hang out with and finally it comes to me.

I pick up my cell and call. "Hey, whatcha up to?" I pause and then ask, "would you like to hang out and get something to eat at the Dot? I mean just friends hanging out and talking," I comment and get a yes in response. "Great see you there in 15 minutes," I comment and we both hang up. I fix my hair and then grab my purse and head out driving over to the Dot.

When I arrive I go in. I know Fitz isn't working, but I see his friend Meghan and smile then sit at a booth. She takes my drink order and then in walks Adam who goes to the counter ordering a drink and then comes to sit with me. "Hey, this was a surprise, I know we used to hang out at the house together when you were with Drew but what's with the sudden phone call and invitation?" he comments and I shrug.

"I was bored and was thinking about Clare and Owen and Drew and I, and realized that maybe we could still be friends even if I'm not with Drew. I mean we got past everything when I found out about you, and we were friends before," I comment.

"Yes I forgave you for that, and that's true we were friends, although it seemed sometimes more like our only commonality was Drew and Clare too," he says and I cringe slightly.

"Well if it's alright with you I'd like to change that and be a better friend. What do you say?" I propose and stick out my hand. Adam takes a moment to think and I'm almost afraid he'll turn me down, but then he grabs my hand to shake it and agrees.

"Sounds good Bianca, it's always nice to have real friends," he comments and I know we both feel that way. We enjoy our food and have a nice conversation, although we stay away from the topic of Drew this time cause we just want to focus on our friendship.

"So how's school going? Did you join another band this year?" I ask in curiosity and he laughs.

"No, I'm focusing more on hosting the radio show this year. Mo is gone, and he started the band, and it just wasn't the same without him although the rest of us do still go to Degrassi," he tells me. We actually sit talking for about 2 hours and then decide we want to do this more often and become good friends. We not only have Drew in common but Clare is a best friend to us both so I hope this will be good for us both. We hug and say goodbye and then I head back to the apartment feeling much better.

(Fitz)

I watch as Gaea squeezes her hand into a fist and lowers her eyes. "It's okay, Gaea, I can just take you home," I offer, although I don't really want her to go.

"Thank you Mark, but I think I'd prefer to stay here," she says and I can't help but smile. "But just talk and sleep if that's ok," she says, and I know why she's nervous, but I want her to know I'd never pressure her.

"You never have to worry about that. I could never be the type of person to truly pressure a girl if she didn't want it. At one time I might have tried to persuade her if it's what I wanted, but I never forced anyone, and I'm not that type of person anymore. I care about you and your feelings Gaea. What you went through must have been traumatic and scary, and you gorgeous still have your true virginity, they couldn't take that from you, and I won't take that from you. Besides, in dealing with my own past, and partly thanks to Clare I became a Christian, so although I lost my virginity a few years ago I don't plan on having sex until I'm married now," I attempt in explaining and I see Gaea's eyes lift and face me again.

"Mark, you really are wonderful," she says as she steps up to me and wraps her arms around my neck and kisses me lightly. I hold her waist and kiss back a little stronger before pulling away.

"You should probably phone home to tell them you're staying somewhere," I mention. "I'll grab you some sweats to sleep in," I comment, and she nods pulling out her phone as I walk back into my room and grab sweats along with my pyjama bottoms and clean boxers. I change in my room and then go back out to the living room/kitchen.

"I called and told my dad I was staying with a friend," she comments. "I'm sorry I haven't told them about you or asked you to meet them, but given everything I've been trying to get up the courage to tell you what I did tonight before I had you meet them in case you walked away," she comments as I hand her the sweats and t-shirt.

"It's ok, I understand better now. I thought introducing you to my mom today might have given you the push I thought maybe you needed to introduce us, but after what happened I understand, and I'm sorry it brought back the pain and memories," I tell her.

"Thanks, and it's not your fault, you didn't know Steve would do that or remind me of what happened as I hadn't told you. And yes I had hoped to introduce you to them and tell them about you but I was trying to find a way to tell you about me first," she explains and I nod in understanding. "I'm just gonna get changed," she comments and I smile. Once she changes in the bathroom and comes back out I look at her and take a deep breath. She looks great in my t-shirt and sweats.

"So I guess now I have a story to tell you too," I comment and she nods this time. "Ok why don't we sit and I'll tell you," I comment and when she nods I move over to the chairs and sit, and she decides to sit on my lap again, which is fine with me as I enjoy having her in my arms and I instantly wrap them around her then take a deep breath this time for what I'm about to say.

"I don't talk to people much about my past. Owen knows as we've been friends for years, and Bianca knows some of it, but most people don't know much before high school. Anyway, my mom got pregnant with me when she was 17. Her parents disowned her, but she married the guy that knocked her up, but he walked out when I was 4 so I don't really consider him my dad. My mom worked hard to provide for us, but it was tough. She dated a couple of men when I was young but they never lasted," I comment thinking about my mom at that time and her from earlier today.

"When I was about 10 I started hanging out with the punks at school and that just escalated. By the time I was 12 I was in what was known at the time as Johnny's gang with Clare's brother Lucas, although he was still a delinquent at that point. We hung out in the ravine a lot, and weren't really interested in school. When I was 13 my mom began dating George, my step-dad. At that point Steve wasn't around so it was fine, and George seemed alright, although I didn't care too much as I figured he would just another short time boyfriend, but about a year later they were married and Steve was living with us. It wasn't long after that George became verbally abusive and Steve was physically abusive to me. He has liked to drink and get high and hated his parent's divorce and took that anger out on me a lot. I am sorry about what he did to you," I add when I see Gaea's eyes drifting off as she is reminded of earlier.

"You don't have to keep apologizing Mark. It wasn't you who did those things, and you rescued and protected me," she comments leaning her head down again as she had part way through my story and then lifted up to speak.

"Thanks, but I just feel bad we didn't leave right away, before he had the chance to come inside," I say and Gaea nods on my shoulder. "So I tried to deal with Steve's abuse and hearing what George would say to my mom, but it just got to me. I continued to hang out in the gang and especially at the ravine and drank a lot. Owen, Bianca and I were quite the trouble makers and bullies as we got older. Johnny cleaned up and graduated, Lucas dropped out and the gang began to disintegrate. I first noticed Clare when she was in grade 9 with pretty long dark blonde hair, glasses and for the first few months wearing a school uniform from her previous Christian school. If I'm being honest, I was intrigued by her, but I thought she was too good for me, and the pretty, but naïve Christian girl could do a lot better than me, and she started dating a jock who then cheated on her. I lost my virginity at 15 to some older girl whose name I don't even remember and the following year Clare came back to school having cut off her hair and gotten laser eye surgery and became fast friends with Adam and an emo kid named Eli who she began dating pretty quick," I explain, and realize a lot more of this story is going to be about Clare, and I hope this doesn't bother Gaea, and yet she needs to know to understand.

"Wow, I didn't realize some of what Clare has had to deal with, and I am so sorry for what you have gone through, especially with being so young. No child should have to deal with mental or physical abuse. I can understand why you would have made the friends you did. I guess there is more to the story, but what surprises me, is how caring you and Owen are and how close both of you have become with Clare given what you just said about her," Gaea replies and I pause a moment to think about everything she mentioned.

"Thank you, and yes it was hard dealing with Steve ad George, but ya Clare has also dealt with a lot. I guess she's talked to you?" I ask.

"Yes, when I told her about what happened to me, and that I was afraid to tell you, and she encouraged me, she also told me about what happened to her sister, and a few other things she's dealt with over the years," Gaea answers and I nod.

"Yes I know some of that stuff, but my friendship with Clare hasn't always been positive so she hasn't always felt comfortable talking to me. See, at that point no one knew about Adam's situation and when Bianca found out she was not pleased because he had been flirting with her. And she asked Owen and I to deal with him, and at the time we didn't really think about it. We were bullies and our best girlfriend asked us to deal with a guy, so that's what we did," I explain.

"Oh dear, I'm almost afraid to know," Gaea comments with a slight cringe, and thinking back on what happened even I cringe at what we did now.

"Well, he was in the guy's bathroom and we came in making comments about him not using the urinal. He tried to run and when we realized what Bianca said was true, Owen picked Adam up over his shoulder, I opened the bathroom door and then Owen threw Adam into the glass door across the hall. The thing was it was supposed to be made of unbreakable glass, but the way Adam hit it, it broke, and scared the crap out of both of us, but we didn't really care. Drew and I got into a fight after that too. But it was different with Clare, and I'm ashamed to have to admit some of the stuff I did, not that I'm at all proud of what I did to Adam either," I explain.

"Oh that's terrible, but I guess all people can have trouble with acceptance. Was he hurt? How did you guys end up getting along now then?" Gaea asks, and I think a moment.

"Well he didn't break any bones, but I think I remember him walking stiffly for a short while, and of course his pride and self-esteem I'm sure were hurt. And I guess in reality we get along due to Clare. See up until Clare and Owen came back from the weekend in Vegas Clare and I, Owen and I and Bianca and I really hadn't spoken much for a while. But when they got back Clare wanted to forgive and forget everything and we became friends again, although technically we weren't what you'd really consider friends before everything, but through her I am friends with Owen again and even some of our old ravine friends who I didn't realize were older brothers to Clare, and along with Owen and Clare, not only did you come into my life, but I got Bianca, as well as Drew and Adam in my life. I wouldn't say we're close, but we can tolerate each other, and I'm sure things will continue being worked on," I muse, speaking as I think.

"I'm glad that through Owen and Clare getting unexpectedly married, that you gained back a number of former friends. But I'm curious what happened with you and them, although I'm guessing you were going to tell me," Gaea comments and I nod.

"See, when Clare started dating Eli I was kind of jealous I guess you could say, and I tried to show that he wasn't right for her. He and I got into a number of fights, and I riled him up, but he also tried to get me back by giving me a fake ID and after a fight the cops came and I was arrested but let off. See he used my photo on the ID of a convicted criminal. But I think the worst part was the night of Vegas night at Degrassi. Has Clare mentioned that at all?" I ask.

"I've heard some bad things happened at Vegas night but no one has told me anything beyond that," she says.

"Well I had blackmailed her into a date. The details aren't needed but she accepted and I met her at the dance. I even had a corsage for her that my mom got and she was really sweet. She had been trying to get Eli and I to stop fighting, and I was okay with this, but due to certain circumstances because Eli couldn't just call it quits, I was poisoned with epicac and super sick. But this is the part that I truly regret, cause then I went after Eli with the pocket knife I had. Clare tried to stop me and I called her a bitch before scaring the crap out of Eli by almost stabbing him. But I hit the wall instead. I was then arrested very quickly. You know the metal detectors at school? Ya those were because of me," I comment thinking back on it and I can hear Clare crying that night in the hallway.

It's now I notice Gaea's eyes have gone wide and I'm again ashamed for what I did. "Mark?" she whispers and sounds almost as if she is afraid.

"I'm not that guy anymore Gaea, please don't feel scared of me, but it took more than just being arrested for that to happen. When I was arrested and in prison a few months I only had a few people I could think of at the time. I thought of my mom, and that's part of the reason I worry about her, is because I wasn't there for her at that point. I also thought about Clare while I was there. She had such a faith and a kind heart. She had tried to stop Eli and I from fighting and in a way she got hurt in the process. It was while I was in there that Owen and Bianca cleaned up and stopped hanging around the ravine, which is why we weren't close when I got out. But it was because of Clare that I became friends with the chaplain, and I accepted Christ while I was there. When I got out I tried apologizing to Clare and Eli. He would have none of it and didn't want her to either. Again I didn't listen and thinking I was right tried to convince Clare again that Eli was bad, to the point I was kind of cyber-stalking her. But one day I was out on my bike and it started pouring rain. I was near Clare's place and she let me in when I knocked. We talked while me clothes dried, after she saw a bruise and I had to explain about Steve's continued abuse which got worse when I got out. But just before I was going to leave as she had asked me to leave when my stuff was dry Eli came by and that was not good. I had to call the chaplain and leave. And besides seeing Clare in the Dot sometimes we didn't really interact much until she came back married," I comment with a slight scowl.

"What's with the scowl Mark, are you serious about being happy for Clare and Owen or are you actually jealous?" Gaea asks, and I realize my thoughts and actions just now, and how petty I'm being.

"Wow, ok no, I truly am happy for them both, and they each deserve the happiness they have found in each other. I guess my feelings on never having a chance with Clare just came out, but it's ok, because now I have a wonderful girl in my life and Owen is truly in love with Clare," I comment and hug my arms tighter around Gaea.

"I'm glad you're happy about us and for them," Gaea comments and I smile before I kiss her temple and then I look at the clock on the wall and see that it's gotten quite late. So with Gaea still on my lap I move my arms lifting her up as I stand and she holds tightly around my neck as I walk back to my room and lay her down softly on my bed.

"Do you want me to grab my sleeping bag and a pillow, so you feel more comfortable in the bed?" I ask.

"Mark we've already slept beside each other in your bed once before, and this time you don't have to keep waking me up. It's ok, I trust you, and I'm not going to kick you out of your bed. You're wonderful just to let me stay here," she comments as a sit down beside her.

"You're welcome to stay here anytime," I comment, and then realize something. "As long as you feel comfortable," I add.

"I asked to come here today didn't I Mark? I feel comfortable here, and I like being here with you," Gaea tells me and I can't help but smile.

"We should probably get to sleep, especially if I'm dropping you off at home before church in the morning," I comment and then climb in on my side and pull up the blankets a bit.

"Ya, I am getting tired. But would you like to come over tomorrow afternoon? Finally meet my family?" Gaea asks and I'm surprised.

"I'd be happy to meet your family, but I thought you didn't want that," I comment slightly confused.

Gaea fixes her pillow a little before answering. "No it was more that I wanted to find a way to tell you about what happened to me, and to Idony which might make her nervous around you, and why our relationship with my parents has been strained over the last 3 years. It's gotten a little stronger since moving up here, but it can still be a struggle. But I'd like for them to get to know my boyfriend, and see how happy I am," she tells me and a smile.

"I'm very happy too," I tell her and then lay back on my pillow. I meet Gaea's eyes and smile and then she lifts up a little and I realize she wants to be in my arms again and I couldn't be happier so I lay my arm out on the bed and she lays down with her head on my arm and her hand on my chest, while I wrap my top arm around her waist, and gradually fall asleep.

(Owen)

Omar gave us the good news that the protection orders had been approved yesterday for Clare, Emma, Gaea, Mark and I against Helen and Glen, while Clare slept. After everyone said goodbye, I quietly unpacked what I could in the living room and kitchen but I could not stop thinking about Clare and why she may have gotten sick. I didn't notice her getting sick this week so for her to all of a sudden throw up was odd. This is my first experience with taking care of someone else as a husband. Mom had given me a little advice before she left and I took it all to heart having quickly run to the store down the street and bought tissues, bottles of water and cans of soup.

After about 3 hours I hear Clare coming out to the kitchen. She still looks worn out but not as pale now. "Do you feel better after the nap?" I ask caringly.

"The sleep helped, but my stomach is still bothering me," she answers.

"Would you like some soup? That might help settle your stomach," I offer and she nods before moving to sit on the couch in the living room. I make chicken noodle and then take it to her setting it down on the side table and then sitting next to her, and wrap my arm around her shoulders as she leans into me slightly.

"You really are wonderful Owen, thank you," she comments with a small smile and I kiss her temple.

"I just hope you get feeling better. It's odd that you got sick so suddenly," I comment what I had been thinking about.

"Ya, I'm not sure what did it," Clare says, and then sits up to eat her soup. I make myself some dinner a little while later, and we have a quiet night in together. We had continued to slowly get closer this week with our intimacy as I continued in helping Clare be more comfortable. I gave Clare another massage one night, this one was on our bed, and again she was naked. I started at her shoulders and worked my way down, but enjoyed focusing on her butt for a while, then her legs and feet, but I still didn't touch between her legs. Another night Clare gave me another hand job, while we kissed after a bit of encouragement at the start, and I certainly enjoyed it as she became more confident.

Tonight Clare decided she wanted a shower to hopefully help her feel better, but asked if I would shower with her which I was more than happy to do. I began to wash her and heard her moan slightly which put a smile on my face, but when I got to her lower stomach she winced and I pulled my hands away at once. She finished washing herself and then washed me, even my manhood which I enjoyed and then we both got out. I grabbed us both towels and handed her one, and was about to dry off, but then Clare began to dry me. "Clare what are you doing?" I asked bewildered.

"Drying you off," she answered quietly.

"I can see that, but I don't understand why. I can dry myself off and you'll get cold if you don't get dry," I remarked with obvious concern that her staying wet and getting cold may make her sick again.

"I thought it was something loving and intimate I could do for you as your wife. I still may not feel completely comfortable, but I'm working on it, but I can stop if this bothers you," she says looking up at me and stops what she's doing.

"No it's alright, I just don't want you to feel like you need to do everything for me, I want you to feel comfortable with yourself as much as with me," I attempt to explain as I put the towel I've still been holding around Clare's shoulders and rub up and down her arms vigorously in an attempt to begin getting her dry as well as warm her up.

Now that we are in our own apartment we walk to our room from the bathroom arm in arm and holding the towels. When we walk in I walk to one of the boxes with our clothes that I couldn't get unpacked while Clare was asleep to grab my pyjamas but stop when Clare begins talking.

"I know we just showered, but Owen you know what I'd love right now," she comments with a slight smile.

"What's that?" I ask.

"I'd love if you would massage me again. I'm feeling a little better now, but maybe if I dictate where to touch it will help," she remarks and I can't help but smile.

"It would be my pleasure," I comment holding out my hand and walking us both to the bed. "Lie down so you're comfortable and tell me where to start," I remark. She sits in the middle of our bed, and pats the spot behind her so I sit behind her with my legs on either side.

"My neck please," she comments, so that's where I start. The massage goes on and she asks me to do a few specific spots after her neck which includes her shoulders, down her back and then she turns for me to do down her legs and her feet. She didn't ask me to do her butt so I assume this is more of a feel better massage and then she turns over again. "Please don't touch my stomach Owen but will you massage my breasts please," she asks, and I'm impressed she felt so confident to ask this.

"Your stomach is still bothering you?" I ask as I begin to gently palm her.

"Yes a little," she comments. And I hope she continues to feel better rather than worse. I continue my massage of her breasts a few minutes and her head lulls back against my shoulder. I see her eyes close and a smile growing on her face, so I'm sure she's enjoying this treatment, and I'm pleased to make her feel this way. And then from my position still sitting behind her I see her legs begin to open and I'm not sure if this is a new reflex for Clare or if she is genuinely opening her legs right now. "Owen will you touch me?" she whispers not even a minute later, and now I'm confused.

"I am touching and massaging you already," I comment and she laughs slightly.

"You're right and you're doing a wonderful job thank you, but that's not what I meant," she tells me. And then I watch and feel as she grabs my left hand with hers from her left breast and I'm still confused as she moves it slowly down her side so just my fingertips graze her and then she places my hand so the palm is on her clit and my fingers are feeling her velvety smooth pussy lips, and I'm shocked.

"Clare?" I ask unsure of what to do and keep my hand still.

"Please touch me Owen, but be gentle," she requests and I look down at her face and realize this is what she really wants. I've only been with two girls before Clare, and although I dated each for a little while, the sex was pretty plain and simple, but to touch Clare even keeping my hand still is wonderful.

"Always gentle if you request it Princess," I comment with a smile and I see Clare's eyes open and look up at me, but then I strum her lips and I see her eyes fall closed again. I continue to massage her right breast as I softly rub my thumb on her clit. I gently massage her pussy lips, toying with them gently and watching her face as she enjoys it. I switch to her left breast as she starts to submit to the pleasure I carefully slip in a finger and earn a moan. I don't go in too far but slip my finger around and stretch her out a little. After a few minutes of her moaning lightly I work in another finger, she whimpers a bit and I get it in a little and begin moving them both but she suddenly grabs my hand.

"Stop please that's enough for now," she says and I instantly stop and remove my fingers to which I earn another whimper.

"Did I hurt you?" I ask.

"No I enjoyed it but that's as much as I'm comfortable with for tonight," she says. I smile and kiss her gently, I'm hard now and she notices. "I can however return the favor," she grins pulling me to lay down and I smile kissing my wife.