Author's Note: Sorry about the lapse between updates. I was dealing with a death in the family, and I just recently got back into the swing of writing again. Those of you who commented, alerted, reviewed and private messaged me - I greatly appreciate your support and encouragement. I love this story. I love Derek and Pen and Maddie and I have a lot more to go with this so we're not even done yet! :) I took some of your advices and did include Janie in this chapter, and I'm glad I did, even though I didn't make her out as evil as I thought I would, it just ended up writing itself the way it did. I've got the next chapter started so the next update won't be as far away. I'll try and keep them at least a couple a month depending on my schedule. Just PM me if you start to get nervous, I don't mind. Hope you guys enjoy! Feedback is always appreciated so feel free to let me know. Just keep it kind and constructive, please.

Happy early thanksgiving everyone!

Chapter Five: The Best Thing I Never Had

As her car came around the corner to their destination, Penelope realized again that it had been a week since she'd last seen the whole team, Derek included. They got called away on a case, and since she was still technically on "leave" she stayed home with Maddie getting things set up in the apartment just the two of them. It actually worked out better in the long run - regardless of their lack of muscles - they managed to get everything set up with help from the movers. Unfortunately, she knew she'd have to go back to work soon, but the idea of leaving her skittish toddler in the care of strangers was making her pretty uncomfortable. In any case, she was hoping JJ might have some ideas for her when she met up with her tonight. Everyone got back last night, so they were all meeting for dinner at Spencer and JJ's house for a home cooked meal.

Derek had been great about video calling Maddie while he'd been away, but they had yet to bring up the big elephant in the room, the fact that Janie had been conspicuously kicked to the curb. He hadn't even opened up to her about any of it yet, she found out from JJ's gossip and good natured meddling between the two of them. She was half tempted to just stay home with the little girl but Maddie was so excited about seeing Derek again, she didn't have it in her to keep her from him.

"Mama! Will Unca Dewik 'ike my dwess?" Maddie asked as she twirled around making a show of one of the fancier outfits they had splurged on for her when she first moved in. It was dark purple with a bright neon orange bow. It was also sleeveless, something she didn't think Maddie would be comfortable with since she had a tendency to hide the scars on her arms but she picked it out herself, and there was no way she could say no to that.

"Of course he will baby. You look beautiful!" Penelope assured the little girl as she reached back in the car to grab her travel bag. Reaching down to grab Maddie's hand she walked up to the house, noticing all the cars were already there so they were the last ones to arrive.

She knocked on the door and was greeted by Reid who was holding Henry.

"Aunt Penny!" Henry squealed lunging over for a hug from his godmother slash 'aunt'.

"Henry! How are you my lovebug?"

"I'm good! Mommy says that if I'm real good Reid will do some more magic tricks later!"

"Well, isn't that exciting!?"

Bobbing his head in excitement, Henry finally notices the little girl hiding behind Penny's leg watching him curiously.

"Aunt Penny who's dat?"

Reid put Henry down on the floor to be at closer eye level to Maddie. They were staring at each other curiously until Penny crouched down and pulled her daughter lightly in front of her keeping a secure arm around the little girl.

"Henry, this is my daughter Maddie. Maddie came to live with me a few weeks ago."

Penelope watched as Henry's face showed him confused before he looked back at Reid for confirmation as his parent nodded his head and crouched down around all of them.

"Hi Maddie," Henry greeted quietly noticing the little girl was pretty small and looked scared at the moment. He always thought his books made him feel better. "Wanna come read some stories with me?" He asks reaching his hand out for her to grab. Maddie looked back at Pen who nodded in approval and gave her a smile of encouragement before grabbing Henry's hand slowly and letting him lead her to the living room where his stuff was all laid out.

"That went well."

The deep voice behind Reid started her a bit. But it was hard to not flush at the smile Derek was giving her as he leaned against the wall, his arms crossed in front of him while his eyes gleamed her way.

"Kids are resilient, they'll be okay," Reid responded, standing up - unaware of the tension in the air as he walked away from them towards the backyard where everyone was mingling.

Standing up slowly, trying to keep her head from clouding at his close presence, she clutched her purse tighter onto her body as if it was anchoring her to where she stood. "Make sure you mention her dress, she picked it out just for you."

The words were quiet but important - and she noted he took it well as a bright smile graced his face at the thought of the toddler going out of her way to impress him.

"I'll be sure to fawn over her then," he smiled and started to walk towards her noticing the faint rose blush that appeared on her cheeks as he got nearer. The hug was meant to be short- nothing dramatic, not like their last encounter - he didn't want to scare her off. He just needed to touch her, and feel her reminding himself that they were closer to a point in their friendship that he almost forgot how much he loved. The part where their intimate glances, jokes, innuendos, and lack of physical boundaries blurred enough to cause him to be euphoric around her. She had almost a magical way of making him feel at peace when they were okay with each other. And his world had been slightly off-kilter on the last few months without that balance in his life.

"I missed you babygirl."

The tension she was holding in her shoulders through their embrace seemed to release instantaneously. Like a balloon losing its air. She melted into him, burying her head in her "nook" the place where his neck and his shoulder met - she deemed it hers years ago, and he didn't realize until now that that singular location had transcended through his whole being. He was hers. She just didn't know it yet.

Her muffled voice on his skin was enough for only him to make out what she whispered, as if it was only between them.

"I missed you too…"

[flashback: nine days ago]

There was tension in the room as Derek watched Janie sit down, her foot tapping impatiently in front of her as she waited for him to start talking. He didn't know what his problem was - he never had a problem breaking up with girls before. But Janie was different. When they first met, she surprised him at how down to earth and kind she was. This bitchy, snide person in front of him, seemed to appear only the last few weeks and he really didn't know what to make of it.

"Are you sleeping with her?"

The abrupt question caught him off guard. So much that it took him a full minute of gaping at her for him to figure out who she was talking about. Pen?

"What? With Pen?"

Her face scowled as she spat back at him. "Yes, her. Are you sleeping together?!"

"No! We're not sleeping together! Christ Janie, she's my best friend!"

She scoffed in disbelief as she stood up walking over to the other side of the room. "Since when? I haven't seen her around much."

When she turned around she saw the glare his eyes were giving her, not expecting his response. "Whose fault is that?"

The accusatory tone his voice took made her step back a bit. The was a power shift in the room, and it was making her uneasy.

"What gave you the right to talk to her anyway? My relationship with her has nothing to do with you."

"Oh! Please! Derek, don't be an idiot. Your relationship has everything to do with me, I am your girlfriend. And the two of you have obviously never heard of boundaries or personal space. My god, if you weren't going to protect us then I obviously had to step up and do it myself!"

"She's been my life for eight years Janie. You had no right to make her feel like -"

"Like what? Like she wasn't as important to you anymore? Like she had to compete with me? Because you obviously had NO problem making me feel that way did you? Or did you even notice?" - The next sentence wasn't accusatory, and loud and angry like it had been going. It was more, aware and defeated. "...I may be your girlfriend Derek, but it's clear to everyone except you and her that your heart and loyalty doesn't lie with me."

He sighed and shook his head, sitting back on the edge of his table. "You never even gave us enough time to get to that point, you just - jumped into this attack mode before anything could grow here."

She shook her head in disagreement, pursing her lips as she looked away from him. "We were never going to get there. You're in love with another woman. And you don't even know it." She laughed at the end of the sentence, causing him to look at her strangely. Her hand was up as soon as his mouth opened to dissent with her statement - "Spare me the bullshit about how you two are just friends Derek. You're in love with her. And she's clearly in love with you. And everyone on this planet except maybe the two of you are aware of that fact. Because that's what it is- it's a fact. And you know what? I'm not going to play second fiddle to some other woman. I deserve better than that. I'm not going love someone who could never love me back fully. Not when his heart has been somewhere else all this time."

He didn't know what to say to that. His heart was hammering in his chest at everything she just spouted out at him. His first step was denial. His second step was trying to remember who was breaking up with who here - this wasn't going where his head thought it was. She pulled the rug out from under him and he wasn't sure where to go next. This relationship seemed to be just as much his fault as it was hers if what she was saying was true. They were doomed from the start.

"She doesn't. I mean - I'm just…" He shook his head in frustration at what he couldn't say.

Janie seemed to take pity on his flustered state and offered him an olive branch turning around before she walked out of his office.

"Take it from someone who knows what it's like to fall in love with you Derek. -Penelope Garcia is in love with you. A million times more than I would ever be."

Watching him take in what she said, she dropped her key to his house on his desk before abruptly leaving.

[end of flashback]

"Unca Dewik!" Maddie squealed in excitement when she saw him walk in the room with her mama. The speed which she dropped her books and ran over to him made everyone pause and glance at the interaction from the corner of their eyes.

He picked her up mid jump and hugged her just as tight as she was holding on to him.

"Well don't you look beautiful Princess!"

Her smile was coy and lit up her whole face obviously pleased at the fact that he noticed.

"Puhple is my powah coolie. Wight mama?"

Pen nodded in agreement and repeated it back in an effort to try and work on her enunciation skills. "Right baby. Purple is your power color."

Maddie brightened at the acknowledgement from her parent before laying her head on Derek's shoulder not ready to let go of his embrace yet. Not that Derek seemed to mind, he readjusted his grip on the little girl, keeping her close as he walked towards the nosy crowd that had been peeking in on them. He looked back noticing Garcia was making her way to the kitchen stopping mid-way until she motioned for him to keep going saying she'd be right out to meet them.

Stopping by the kitchen to put the desert out of her bag into the fridge for later, she closed the door and stepped towards the island, releasing a tense breath she wasn't aware she was holding. Her whole body felt like it was on fire just from - whatever it was that happened in the foyer a few minutes ago - and her heart needed to stop racing if she was going to maintain a nice composure out there. She just needed to stay level headed and remind herself of the facts. 'Derek and I are just friends. We are just friends. It's fine. Shake it off woman..'

"Oh honey, you and Derek have never been just friends."

Looking up in shock as she saw Emily walk over with a glass of white wine for her.

"I said that out loud?"

"More like mumbled it under your breath, but I've got some pretty nice listening skills."

She tried to take a sip of the wine but her stomach wasn't having any of it after the roller coaster of emotions she just put it through.

"A little off your game today, huh?"

Nodding quietly as she pursed her lips in thought, her head started shaking in disagreement.

"No. No this is - a bump we're just - friends Emily. He doesn't see me like that. I'm not his type. This is - I'm not.. I mean.,.. Oh god. Oh my god." Shaking her head as she put her glass down, she felt a wave of tears start to well up in her eyes.

"Hey, hey woah.. What's with the tears Garcia?" Laying her glass down she walks over to her friend, pulling her into a supportive hug. "This is a good thing. Love is a good thing."

Her words were meant to be supportive, but it just made her feel more uncomfortable. Releasing her from her embrace, Emily handed her the glass of wine again encouraging her to take small sips and take some deep breaths, close her eyes to calm herself down a bit. After a few minutes of rubbing her arm and watching as she downed the whole glass and then reached for hers, she smiled knowing her friend was completely oblivious to the power and effect she had on Derek.

"I'm fine, I just - I'm a bit emotional lately."

Nodding in silence, Emily watches as her friend, one of her best friends starts to acknowledge the obvious emotion in the room.

"… I love him, Emily. I do. I.." her voice cracks as her eyes well up again and she looks back down - "I love him."

"Then tell him."

"Tell who what?" Derek's voice startled them both, enough for her to drop her glass on the counter breaking the tension filled silence that had taken over the kitchen.

"Oh bugger!" Her reaction was automatic, avoid the topic and clean up the mess. Her bare hands reaching for the broken glass to scoop up caused more harm than good as the shards dug into her hands causing her to squeal and drop the shards on the ground making an even bigger mess of everything.

"Ooookay, Garcia seriously leave it alone. I'll clean it up. Go clean your hands okay," Emily responded watching as Derek made his way over to help her get out of the kitchen.

"I'm okay. I'm fine I just -"

"Let me take a look at it come on."

Derek dragged her out of the kitchen and headed towards the guest bathroom down the hall, trying to keep himself calm. His thoughts were muddled, and he wished he hadn't been eavesdropping because now his mind couldn't stop mulling over what she'd said to Emily. She loved someone else. She was in love. And he was going to lose her. Again. To another Kevin.

She used the toddler step stool to sit up on the counter while he grabbed the first aid kit and started to pull some shards out of her hands then using rubbing alcohol to clean the areas off. They were almost at eye level now with her all the way up on the counter. Her hand was throbbing, she was lucky it was only a few, and they weren't deep enough for her to require medical treatment. She'd most likely get it checked out later anyways, just to be safe. Derek was quiet and focused, his hands steady as he pulled the shards out gently. She was sure he couldn't feel the same heat and current running through her because he was touching her.

When he was done a few minutes later, he put some ointment on there and wrapped her hand up gently to help keep it from getting infected.

"Thank you."

She whispered it as she watched him quietly clean up after them, making it as if they weren't ever there. She was about to open her mouth again when he spoke up instead.

"Who is he?"

The gaze she gave him was one of confusion.

"The guy you were telling Emily about. The one you're -" He tried to clarify. But he couldn't even say it out loud. His stomach dropped at the thought of them missing another chance with each other. "I know I'm jumping some sort of - imaginary line, here… between us - but I can't just, lose you. Again. You know I was… the bigger guy, before, the better guy - last time and, and - and even though it killed me I just wanted you to be happy and I thought Kevin made you happy…"

She opened her mouth to interrupt him, but there wasn't any stopping him right now, he was pacing and muttering and adorably awkward it was almost as if they had switched roles.

"But this guy that - you know you love, he just - he can't make you as happy as I.. I can make you. I can make you happy, babygirl. I love you. And, and .. and I know that this is sudden and random but it's not- you've been, my life for the past eight years and I've just - been too blind to see it. I'm sorry, I am so sorry for that. And, I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there is a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something too. All I ask, please, is that you just… don't..- don't dismiss that. Just give me a chance, I -

Her lips were on his before he even noticed that she had slipped off the counter on her own. It took him a millisecond to respond, his lips molded onto hers as she slipped her fingers of her undamaged hand behind his head to hold him close. Her body was on fire before their lips met, now it was as if she was melting into him as his hands held her up, sliding down to her bottom to pick her up and place her legs around him. She didn't even have a chance to feel self-conscious, his kiss became even more hungry, as her mouth opened and her head tilted to let his tongue slide in dancing between their mouths. They broke quietly, their harsh breaths showing the lack of oxygen that had become a necessity.

Her eyes were still closed as his face stayed near hers - they tried to get their bearings as he let her out of his arms slowly, causing her to slide down and open her eyes to watch him.

When his eyes opened, they were questioning - but she could tell, he was hopeful. He wanted it to mean something.

"I love you. You're the one I was telling Emily about. It's-.." she laughed a bit before she looked up at him, a blush covering her cheeks as her admissions came out of her mouth. "It's always been you."

He smiled. His hand was nearly touching hers and she had this strange feeling. Electric, like a current running from his skin to hers. The thin slit of distance between them was as tensely tangible as the moment between thunder and lightening. It lasted about as long as that too, as soon as her confession slipped out, his mouth was back on hers and she was back on the counter being lifted, wrapping her legs back around him as if it was already second nature to do so.

Was it worth the wait guys? Please review if you read it. I didn't mean to take it this far, but I got so inspired when I started writing I just.. couldn't stop.