Disclaimer: Only the umpf in here is mine, all else belongs to whomever it belongs *smiles*

A/N:

So today we return to Kurt and Blaine. I have been missing them.

Tears Stained

Chapter Twelve: Memories Green

It is almost 10am on this Thursday morning in Lima, Ohio. And while Wes spends his last minutes in an airplane seat - feeling like an object trapped in a time capsule waiting to be rediscovered by someone who still holds him dear after all this time, hopefully - time after breakfast in Lima, that just ended twenty minutes ago, has begun to speed up for Blaine and Kurt in an almost alarming manner.

Finally more relaxed after a complicated start to the day, they had struggled to hold on to that feeling rushing back to the hospital, thinking they would be late, so late – Kurt in the car quickly sending Santana a brief text letting her know he won't be in school today, almost begging her to please not try anything reckless without him there to, well, basically be her Jiminy Cricket. They had arrived, in the end, just about, what they had thought to be, in time, only to discover Blaine's mother had gotten it wrong, once again, and Blaine is not needed at the hospital for another hour. And Kurt wishes he had thought to at least try and check with someone at the hospital again before having Blaine suffer through an additional hour of misery in the white-washed halls of this dreaded building.

Kurt and Blaine are both still feeling a little nauseous and unhinged and could not be more grateful that Carole and Burt are still here with them, every step of the way over the next hours, literally.

In waiting-rooms, in hallways in front of operating-rooms, in the recovery room when Blaine wakes up, left hand already held by Kurt in both of his, Blaine already squeezing back before he finds the energy to open his one uncovered eye or say a single word.

Hearing Kurt's relieved exclamation, "He is squeezing my hand, he is waking up, Mom," Carole rushes over. And so Blaine opens his eyes to Carole and Kurt smiling at him.

Hearing Blaine croak out a, "Hey," his throat dry, Kurt asks, "Would you like some ice chips? The nurses have shown me where I can get them."

Blaine nods with a grateful smile, still groggy.

And while Kurt leaves for a moment Carole moves to place a kiss to Blaine's forehead, and affectionately squeezes Blaine's hands as she says gently, "I am so happy you are coming home with us, so happy."

Kurt comes back a moment later to find Blaine close to tears, emotional with exhaustion strong, and Carole running a hand again and again over Blaine's hair, repeating over and over, "It's okay. We're here for you."

Someone wanting to be anywhere for him, '…for me,' it is still hard for Blaine to comprehend.

Carole moves back to Burt, who is sitting in a chair a couple of feet away, as Kurt reclaims the space right next to Blaine on his bed.

"Here, Baby," Kurt whispers as he holds up a single ice chip between two fingers and slowly lifts them up to Blaine's lips.

Blaine gratefully parts his lips and sucks the cooling piece of water from between Kurt's fingers into his mouth, as soon as it has melted whispering "Thank you," to Kurt, asking a moment later, voice still rough, "My lips are so dry, could you …."

Kurt is leaning over Blaine a split-second later, pressing their lips together, carefully tracing along Blaine's lips with his tongue almost instantly, longing for undeniable reassurance they are both here, and a big part of what both of them dreaded so much over.

Blaine parts his lips on instinct, the kiss deepening, Blaine almost hungrily absorbing the loving warmth his boyfriend offers, that is until both of them remember Kurt's parents are still very much with them in the room.

Blaine cannot help but simply smile as he watches Kurt draw back a little, scrunching his eyes shut in the most adorable way and already beginning to blush, his skin only turning a deeper reddish shade of pink as Kurt turns around to glance at his mom and dad, who Blaine, looking past Kurt's left, is no longer surprised to find smiling, almost grinning as all of them, in a room so quiet, hear Blaine say softly, "I actually just meant you could trace my lips with an ice chip, but I guess that worked just fine as well."

"Okay," Kurt squeaks only blushing deeper, turning his gaze to his own lap for a short moment - in which he is holding Blaine's left hand wrapped in his own two once again now - trying to regain at least the appearance of composure.

Carole walks over and places one more kiss each to the boys' foreheads, which has Kurt looking back up, "I'll be on my way home then, prepare some things for tonight, and your dad will stay with you, and bring you two home later."

Blaine's heart jumps at the word, 'Home.' "Thank you, Carole."

"Yeah, thank you, Mom. For everything. Wait! How are you getting home without the car?"

Carole offers one more warm smile to both of them as she explains, "We came with two cars this morning, just in case," and slinging her handbag over her shoulder and waving goodbye she makes her way to the door.

As soon as the door has closed behind her, Blaine's and Kurt's focus returns to each other, Kurt kicking off his shoes and fully climbing up on the hospital bed now he had sat on already, snuggling into his boyfriend's side, as he had the night of the attack.

They soon fall into a deep sleep, and Burt does not get a chance to ask Blaine how the pain is now, but he assumes much more bearable than this morning when Blaine had to stay off painkillers till the operation itself.

Burt does not really mind the unanswered questions though, or the quiet they come wrapped in, not right now. 'There'll be time for questions later.' For now watching his boys able to find happiness with each other even in all of this chaos is '… more than I could have wished for.'

So Burt is left sitting here, waiting, thinking back to this morning's events, after they had met up in the hospital's parking lot – turning his memories over and over again, maybe secretly or subconsciously still looking for answers.

While Wes had sat on the airplane, fighting with himself to not forget and to not remember and do that right, with all the right parts, the small booth in the café, not too close to the hospital Blaine had dreaded reentering all morning, had lain in silence. Coffees and teas being sipped quietly, the steam evaporating from them had for a long time remained the only motion visible at the table the four of them had sat at, for, in the end, around one and a half hours.

They had ordered their drinks about entering and taken them with them to the quietest looking booth at the row of high windows running along the front of the large room, after a moment all beginning to take their first sips, eyes fixed on breakfast menus – Carole holding, unnoticed by the boys Burt's hand in a reassuring grip under the table. Burt had been nervous all morning about this meeting, about the boys' state of mind today.

Kurt and Blaine nervous as well had immediately started dealing with their nerves their very own way, sharing an extra-large cup of latte, the rim of the cup covered in sugar and cinnamon; shared kisses too towards the end of the meal, tasting sweet, tasting reassuringly strong … of love.

The café, deliberately picked by Burt for being a good while, at least twenty minutes by car, away from the hospital, had not been very busy this Thursday morning. And Burt, even though the boys' nerves lying raw had been obvious from the get go, had kept hoping this quiet and the distance from all the places and people dreaded by Blaine and Kurt, would in the end allow them to truly relax for a short while at least.

Burt had wanted to ask Blaine about the pain ever since Blaine had had buried himself in his arms in the hospital's parking lot – remembering the previous days' events, remembering Blaine's mother all too well, '… and who could forget her.'

In the end Burt had held back, unsure if then and there could ever have been the time and place to bring up anything potentially upsetting – Burt trying to avoid new aggravation, new and more pain for his family.

Finally, eventually, menus put aside, and tired but grateful smiles exchanged with Burt and Carole, sitting directly opposite them, Blaine had tried hard to concentrate on whatever it was Kurt had begun to say to his parents, but he quickly had found himself slipping back deep into thought as he had been on the drive over here – Kurt's hand holding his not only a welcome but much needed anchor.

And while Wes had been sitting alone, lost in thought, too, in a metal tube shooting through the skies, Kurt and Blaine had sat close, closer than they usually do in a public place, both far too exhausted to care about, or even notice most of, the handful of looks thrown their way – people not able to effortlessly blend back into a current of disapproval, hate, their stares blatantly obvious in this empty a space.

Frankly, Carole and Burt had done an amazing job staring the ignorance down, almost daring people to try one more look like that in a place with a rainbow flag in the window.

'I wish acceptance, appreciation even, and love could keep ignorance out,' Carole had found herself thinking, will later tonight share this thought with Burt, who will bury his head in her shoulder and cry all his disappointment with this world thoroughly out. Being strong for each other builds the trust needed to allow oneself to be open with each other, it is a strength – tears shared are a strength, not a weakness.

Blaine after a while noticing what had been going on, had not known whether to burst with happiness or into tears himself, always aware at the back of his mind that his mother would be one of those giving the nastiest looks, supposed to make him, '… us,' feel worthless and pathetic, worst of all, '… inhuman.'

She has done it to him many times, keeps doing it. Kurt has only seen the tip of the iceberg so far, and Blaine hopes more than anything that, when he has his strength back, he will be able to keep it that way.

This too, wanting to protect Kurt from having to ever experience the full extent of one of his mother's episodes, is the reason relief had replaced pain so quickly as he had learned the previous night that, once again, his mother would not be sticking around to care for him. 'Not that she has ever cared about me.'

The thoughts, dark, had kept playing over in his head, all morning, and the more they had the more it had hurt.

And so Blaine had missed the much more important looks this morning, exchanged between Burt and Kurt, filled to the brim with the wish to find a way to make Blaine feel loved as much as he truly is by them. And Blaine had missed, too, Carole fighting with her instinct to reach out and take Kurt's and his intertwined hands in hers, to comfort, to sooth the pain away.

Blaine had still stared absentmindedly at the blank, polished table surface when the waitress had come by, had missed her greeting and questions, missed Burt and Carole ordering their food.

Burt had smiled warmly at his son when Kurt had stepped in instantly and ordered for himself … and Blaine as well.

"He'll have a croissant too, and can we have two cranberry-apple-grapefruit juices?

"Sure," the short, slim woman, Kurt had assumed to be in her late fifties, with short bleach blond hair and big brown eyes, had smiled at Kurt not even seeming startled in the least by the two boys before her holding hands on the table.

"Thank you." And Kurt had said it in a way, the woman with the nametag Hazel which Kurt had only noticed then, had known it was about more than taking a customer's order.

With another smile, eyes briefly flickering to the, to her, sad-looking boy with the eye-patch before her, and then back to the boy she had just spoken to, Hazel had added, "If you need anything else just let me know when I bring your food."

Kurt had only been able to nod this time, lump lodged in his throat, 'It feels so good, being treated like a person for once, by a complete stranger,' it had beenoverwhelming too, especially today.

Kurt all the while had kept holding Blaine's right hand securely in his own left. The loving gesture saying all, meaning so much, to both of them, 'I'm here. You are not alone,' – this knowledge made tangible in the, to the outside world, so simple looking gesture, all that had kept Blaine from a complete breakdown right there and then.

Blaine had noted the arrival of the food, but feeling his stomach turn at the mere sight he had almost jumped up, startling Kurt and Hazel alike, who had returned to the food counter only a moment later, having enough sensibility in her body to know that this had to be personal.

"Sorry, bathroom," Blaine had muttered eye already fixed on the floor, …

… only looking up briefly at Kurt's next words. "Love, I'll…."

"No, Kurt. Please. I need a moment."

"But if you need h…."

"Kurt, please, just … just let me go." And Blaine had almost looked like he had been about to cry again. And Kurt had known he probably ought to put it down to the exhaustion they both had been feeling all morning already, but that had been so much easier thought than done.

So Kurt, in the end, simply had nodded, had held in the fear filled sigh until the bathroom door had swung shut behind Blaine, having given him only a warm smile on the way with him.

For Burt hearing the sigh had been confirmation enough that the black barely detectible under Kurt's eyes without practice is not a fashion statement at all, 'some days, yes, but not …, not today.' So Burt had seized the opportunity.

"Eyeliner? Kurt."

"I know. Not fooling anyone. Well, not you anyway," Kurt had let out another sigh.

His head had hung until he had heard Carole's voice, "I'm missing something, right?"

Carole had still been looking back and forth between her step-son and his father when Burt, sitting directly opposite his son, after one last glance at Carole, had taken Kurt's hands both in his own, frowning at how cold they had been, and beginning to rub some life back into them had started "Kurt tried to …."

"It works, Dad," Kurt had interrupted fixing his eyes on his dad.

Burt had stared right back at his son, eyebrows raised.

"And I always thought you got that look from your mom," Carole had said through an obvious smile.

Kurt letting out a scoffing laugh had replied with a frown turned into a half-smile already, eyes locked with Burt's still, "No. Dad first gave me that Really-Kurt-Really? look every time I showed up at the breakfast table in heels for a whole month when I was six."

"You remember that?" Burt had asked, expression turning soft and hands rubbing with more love and less vigor along Kurt's hands still wrapped in his.

Kurt had nodded smiling softly, then, "Yeah, I remember. I used to go ask mom if they matched my clothes and she just said 'You can wear whatever you want, Sweetheart, as long as it makes you happy.' And I remember being a pain in the ass back then already and asking her back every time, 'But do they match?' And she would just smile more and say, 'Kurt, Sweety… "

"…they match your personality perfectly," Burt had finished the statement with a wide smile of his own.

"Yeah," Kurt had agreed, swallowing a lump building in his throat, eyes then fixed on the table alone again. "I wish she was here now. Sorry, Carole."

"It's okay. I understand."

"You are great, Carole, but…."

"But?" Carole had prompted softly.

"You are so so great Carole, I just wish, with Blaine's mother being as she is, Blaine could have seen how accepting my mom was with me."

Burt had taken a deep breath, before he had coaxed Kurt into looking back up at him with a warm squeeze to his hands. "Kurt. The eyeliner though …, I just don't want you to feel like you have to pretend. Not with me, … with us. Not ever. I get that you need your personal space but trying to block us out like this …."

Kurt had caved in then, "Okay, then let me rephrase: It helps me, Dad. That I can convince myself it works, helps me to not break down in front of you, … in front of Blaine. He does not need that today, Dad. Okay?" Kurt had almost sounded desperate then, looked so close to tears Burt had been able to feel his son's ache.

"I just want you to know, you, both of you, don't have to keep it …, keep anything, in. I know this must all be confusing. I know Blaine is the one who is about to have surgery …."

Kurt had cut his dad off with a sentence followed by a sob, "He is trying to play it down but I know, Dad, I just know, I can feel it …, he is in so much pain, Dad."

"Kurt, Son, I don't want you to pretend you are not hurting too, because I can tell you are, eyeliner or not."

Burt glancing over to Carole had caught her still confused expression so gone on, "Whenever he is especially exhausted, this one here tries to cover it up by drawing attention to his eyes, away from the paler than usual skin. Eyeliner, not a fashion statement for once. And it is so little hardly anyone notices anyway."

"It does distract," Kurt had swallowed hard, "… help, I mean. It helps!" Kurt had still tried for convincing, had failed miserably.

And had Blaine been with him right then he would have pointed out the slight pout that only ever surfaces when Kurt wants something, badly, very badly, or Kurt knows of the pointlessness of an action he cannot help, too much habit laced into it. Kurt has used eyeliner like this for years, has himself convinced it works for him.

Burt had tried hard for softness to his tone, "Kiddo, only with people who don't know you, or don't care to look properly."

"Or are groggy and have been drugged out of their mind for the last 36 hours."

Kurt had jumped as he had heard Blaine's voice coming from behind him, then whispered in an almost inaudibly low tone, "Please don't be mad at me."

Burt remembers it all too clear still right now, sitting in the hospital's recovery room of his son's boyfriend, the fear on his son's face, fear that he might have done it, done something that has him deserve to be loved less by one of the handful people whose love means everything to him.

There is no trace of that fear on Kurt's face now, no anger or confusion on either boy's face. It had not been that simple for them this morning. And Burt wishes for them more than anything, to grow, together, to fully understand how much they deserve to be loved with all their flaws, with all their insecurities, that the understanding that comes from truly living with those, openly, allows them to love this deeply.

A/N: Burt kind of, okay, totally hijacked that last part, I hope you don't mind. I have been missing him and Carole too.

Blaine's full reaction is coming up next chapter. I hope you thoroughly enjoyed this chapter. It is my favorite in a long time, I think. What can I say, I am a sucker for these four interacting, and how do you feel about my OC Hazel? I love the name.