Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or any content from the Megami Tensei series as a whole. I do not claim to own anything. All contents' right belong to their respectful owners. Once again, I do not claim to own anything.
Here we be again. I'm gonna attempt to get a chapter out every weekend if at all possible. Given this one's potential length you might be seeing two for this week, but I am not making any more promises, because unlike Naoya I cannot always keep them. But if I keep the general pace, the story will pretty much be done by the end of the month. Chapter 26 and 27 kind of have to go together. 28 and 29 are the final battle, so they shall be uploaded most likely together, maybe with a brief break in between. Chapter 30 is the epilogue so that is gonna be a pretty lengthy endeavor to conclude the project and probably will take awhile, but I'll try to get it out in the range of Ch28 and 29 being uploaded.
Shout out time again. I think I'll do this for the remaining intros. Might not have enough people to shout out to though. The author's name is Jodasgreat and the story is his crossover of Persona 1 character from 1996 to the modern days of Persona 4. The title is Persona 4: Be Your True Mind, and it ultimately is a contributor to me continuing. Not because it's the title of this project with a four, and, like, an original premise but because it is a Persona story on this site that uses Persona 1 characters and therefore it deserves at least some attention. How it enabled me to get up on the horse again? The latest review stung me in the heart. I didn't want it to be the only active P1 story on the here. I wanted to finish what I started and as you can see I resurrected this dog I swore I put down.
With that aside, welcome to Persona: Be Your True Mind Chapter Twenty Six.
Chapter Twenty Six: Faceless
"Mistress Maki-hee!" The animated snowman Jack Frost was sitting blanched. His Mistress dismissed him from his Spell Card, releasing him to the chafe-like plain deep in the Lost Forest. Maki lay on a nostalgic box spring mattress dressed with medical white sheets. She cast Jack Frost from the sea of her soul, lay on her side facing the shielding trees forming the bounders of the room, and told him to go to Mai.
The snowman refused. "Mistress Maki-hee! You can't-hee abandon your amihos!"
The burden she held was unfathomable to the imp.
The icy demon sprayed tears. "Please, Mistress Maki-hee! Mistress Aki-hee's gone! Mistress Pandora-hee swallowed her! I'll melt-hee if I lose-hee you, too!"
Jack Frost's words were far from insipid. Pandora, thanks to Aki's breaking the seals the original Maki Sonomura created to bury her, the incarnation of the entire girl's evil was preparing in her domain to demolish the paradise in the heart. All the Makis knew this fact. In the end, Aki was going to accomplish what she said she wanted. Everyone was going to disappear.
"Aki's…dead. Maki…no…my malice is dead. Maybe not dead, Pandora absorbed the darker childhood secrets that created Aki into her vortex of odiousness. What would happen if Pandora was…killed? She is practically my shadow…she's the inner flaws and weaknesses of me. If we acknowledged that figment of psyche, would it stop the incessant bothering?"
"Acknowledging our dark side is not done as fast as a flip of coin. I know I cannot live with myself with what I've done. My thoughts they terrorized my friends. The peace suffered. The world suffered all because of my jealousy. All because of my loneliness, I became an executioner for humanity! How can I live with that? How can I accept that and move on! I deserve to stay her alone! I deserve to succumb to Pandora's abolishment of this forsaken place!"
"Maki,"
"That voice…Mom."
"It's me!" Setsuko Sonomura had dashed to her room, flattening the dismissed Jack Frost in the process. "It's me your mother!"
"I won't show myself to her…I can't show her my face."
"Let's go back together, Maki." Setsuko exclaimed, concerned engaged.
"Don't come near me!" Maki screamed, hugging herself. "Shut your eyes. You can't look at her."
"Look, Maki! These people came all this way because they were worried about you!"
"They, how did they come back? Why did they come back? Don't they see I'm terrible?"
"Why…" Maki shot around to stare her mother passed her glasses. Her face was covered, bolted with a pure white plate, circular around her oval shape face. The tile-like panel plastered to her face became her new demeanor. Expression-less, emotion-less, it was the example of nothing, hiding her covered features. She had no identity any longer. She was a faceless being. She no longer symbolized happiness and morals. She was no one. She had no name, but Maki Sonomura. She had no distinguishment other than Maki Sonomura's odious deeds. She was a mask, a mask to hide her self from the world.
"Why did you all come her?" She screamed, the mask disguising any possible hint of fluster. "Don't you know what kind of girl I am?"
"Maki…" Masao said as weakly as before. "I know you feel like you can't let what the original Maki did go, but doesn't everyone get jealous now and then, one way or another?"
"Stop, Masao-kun! Please don—"
Masao cut her off. "I know I do! I was jealous of Nao, Maki. Can you stomach that? I was jealous of my best friend and you want to know why? It was because of his relationship with YOU Maki. Here I am trying my hardest to proclaim my feelings and Nao's chatting you up with out an ounce of trouble. He's my best friend, Maki, and even I envied his ability to talk to you. I wanted the deft intimacy you two shared."
Naoya's shock at Maki's appearance was withdrawn as Masao was gulping his dirty laundry. The ear ringed boy flicked his discernable hoop and grabbed his friend's shoulder.
"No worries, Mark." He said. "I was jealous of him likewise, Maki. Mark, always could bullshit with the best of them. He could always be brazen and courageous. He spoke when he wanted, acted how he wanted. Deep down, I wanted to crack my shell open and fly as widely as Mark can. I wanted to have conversations with more than four people in my life, Maki. I wanted his brashness and ballsy attitude. I could carrying a tune with you about anything. I could shoot the breeze with this guy here, but most others…with the exception of Eriko, I couldn't climb out of my shell to speak as openly."
Masao and Naoya high-fived and clutched each others' fist. "See Maki, even though we were jealous of each other, are bond is as strong as ever."
"On top of that, Sonomura," Kei piped. "You were simple being used as a pawn in the ploys of a madman. It's Kandori's fault, not yours."
"The Crawling Chaos is to blame even more, Maki." Eriko chimed. "He is the root of the problem for us—"
"How often did I try to kill everyone?" Maki exclaimed, interrupting Eriko's statement with a crass tone unbecoming of her usual self.
"How can you be so nice to me?" She demanded, likely sticking her nose up at them under her mask.
"I don't want your pity!" She cried, cringing in her very own skin. "It just makes me more miserable!"
"I…deserve to die!" Maki yelled. "Don't you get it? After all I have done, I deserve to die!"
"That's not true!" Masao snapped.
"Why do you deserve death?" Kei asked. "Because of petty jealousy, because of uncontrollable thoughts placating your mind,"
"Like, stop saying stuff like that, Maki!" Ayase ordered, reaching tears again. "How can you say you deserve to die?"
"Just because you wanted what everyone had?" Eriko stated. "I'm sure if any of us were in your position for all those months, with all your years of experience, with the minimalistic amount of companionship, we'd turn in on ourselves too and indubitable want scorn and jealous for those who had what we were not allowed."
"I've been there, Maki." Yukino said, bravely. "When I was a member of the Papillions, the reason I joined was to savor the freedom and dominion they had. The gang members were honored with the availability of delinquency. They had no rules to follow, no customs to oblige to. I wanted exactly that when I moved to Mikage and I did. Even, with me no longer a member, and they were disbanded and punished by the MPD, I am still sanctioned by association to have caused the same amount of violence and vandalism as they had. Hanya, that scar-face wannabe, rides me every day. You know what, Maki, I live with it. I don't let it dictate who I am or what my life means to me."
"STOP IT!" She screamed surprisingly through the mask. The faceless being had a gargantuan vocal range.
"Stop lying! Stop playing sympathy with me! You know it in your hearts, that I am a terrible human being! You know it, don't you, Nao-kun? You know I'm the worst girl alive!"
Naoya shook his head immediately, giving the brunette an answer he had given her in another form. "Don't hide like that, Maki."
"Todo is right!" Kei added spontaneously. "I'm sorry but I cannot address this petulant child with innuendo and sly phrases! You've sown these seeds, Sonomura, and now it's time to reap them! If you want to die, Sonomura, why sit around and mope about it? Don't make empty threats if you don't have the courage of your convictions! You spoke of pity? Don't make me laugh. We came here of our own will because we could sympathize with you. I can sympathize with you! My parents were strangers to me, Sonomura, you saw it in the Sisters wind did you not? They cared for me not as a son, but an heir! I was meant to carry on in name, but not in prosperity of love and care! I was abandoned to study and craft myself with my own hands! I resented them each! I hate them now! Can you not see the similarity? My outlet of hope was Yamaoka. His death caused pain, but they are merely birthing scars for he is with me till the end of the line!"
"Kei, no, sto—"
"What chapter do you give up feeling sorrow for your self, Sonomura?" Brown exclaimed, his turn to interrupt. "So what you got a skeleton in your closet? What good do you think wallowing in woe is gonna do you? I can tell you, it made my insides a scourge to my body! I turned my back to my friends in vein of what you have done, Maki! Guess what I did, I ruined our relationship to lengths you wouldn't believe! Now, they won't even answer a call from my parents! I fucked up that bad! Look, at us both now, Maki! Look at all the friends we have around us! I felt a compelling loneliness from my actions, but now I have reclaimed a speckle of what I used to. Look at yourself, you have done things as well, but look at each of us standing her exploding at you! We ARE HERE for YOU! Get it!"
"Brown, no! Please,"
"Like, don't you dare say you want to die for feeling lonely!" Ayase snapped. "I have autophobia! Know what that is, Maki? Fear of loneliness, like so if I am by myself, like, I can't breathe because my heart is racing at mach five! My anxiety is inescapable; I can sympathize with your pain in isolation, Maki! It's totally terrible; you feel like you're being ignored! You want badly for another person to sit in chair at your bed just to help you go to sleep! You are, like, paralyzed at the thought and the moment it happens, you are totally D-O-N-E! You can't move, you suffer inside and out! You have to gather people in flocks to keep your stress down! I've endured this my entire life, and I can never hate you, Maki! I can never say I blame you for hating being alone! But don't you dare, don't you ever say you want to die! I can't let you give up, when you can live on! I wore a mask too! A fake face to keep others from leaving me! I had to be follower! I had to, like, reject my true feelings, to be with others! Now, I don't have to hide anymore, Maki! I can show my true face to my real friends! I don't have to fear being alone anymore, because the bright side of the truth is I can have close friends! Those close friends would put themselves in harm's way for me! Like Brown said! Look at us! Look at how far we came for you!"
"Ayase-chan, I never…"
"You never realized how similar you were until right here, right now, huh, Airhead?" Reiji stated, walking to the bed as close as possible. "It's a big thought buster isn't it? When you realize you and another person you have journeyed with are no different than you are. Maki, I'm talkin' bout' you and I. I didn't see it at all, until I saw the real deal in that hospital bed like a cadaver on a slab. We both grew up without fathers, right? Our mothers made sacrifices to raise us based on the conditions our life styles were in. I was lonely as well. It's such as openly gentle thing to say aloud, especially when all these other wimps said the same, but I am being sincere with you. I was alone, carving out a name for myself in the world. My blood was boiling with unstable want of vengeance. I had no one, but my mother and I didn't hate her. That's probably where we differ. The reason I did not hate her is that I knew she wasn't the cause of our hell. Kandori and his father were, and my rage and ruffian-traits did not help. I isolated myself with punches and kicks. I bit and crawled to one day reach my brother's throat and rip it out. Then I fell into another hole in my life and understood finally, all my rage, all my hatred had left me nothing but my mother as my companion. Do you want to die, Maki, alone and by yourself without even your mother, who ran to you in concern with demons in the mist? Do you deserve to die for an uncontrollable wind in the roads of life, alone, when all you nakama have bit and crawled their way to save you?"
She touched the bolted mask that rendered her faceless. She grabbed her head harshly. "You…I…stop! I can't face you…I'm better alone…"
"But even before we came here, Sonomrua…" Kei started again. "Did you think you were alone in this world? We live at the sufferance of others. Each is responsible for each. Your careless decision of suicide would have left behind wounds that would never heal on each of us. If you still want to die, even now after hearing our sympathies go ahead. Put it all behind you, but you are our friend and we can never put you behind us."
"I'm selfish even when I'm the ideal me, aren't I?"
"Now, let's get back!" Kei was further crass.
"My misery caused others misery which turned back and caused me internal misery to where if I, Maki Sonomura, were to deal with misery I would cause my friends true misery. Does that make sense?"
"We still have to rescue Maki on our own." Kei was at the door, ready to leave.
"They care for me, Maki Sonomura. They still want to save her life, even when she, I, have harbored such complaints, such agony, and devilish desires towards them? I am an airhead. Like wanting to locate hay in a haystack, its all right in my face."
"I don't leave things undone. Let us go, if you allow us to Todo."
"Wait!" Maki cried, the white mask crumbling to dust. Her rose cheeks, her benign mole, her chocolate eyes displayed to them unlimited affection. "I'm sorry, everyone. Please…please, let me come along. Even if I'm a dream, or an illusion, or a shadow…I'm still me and…I have Nao-kun and the rest of you with me! That's all I need. I'm not lonely anymore! I can forgive myself. I know the real me can forgive her thoughts! I won't let this world collapse in despair! I'll save myself and I have you guys to help! Thank you…for saving me. So, please, let me come along. If we beat Pandora, I know in my heart we can change Maki Sonomura."
"Heh, of course you can come!" Masao eagerly exclaimed. "Welcome back, Maki!"
A shatter of glass was heard in Maki's mind. "Thou art I and I am thou! Thou hast proven thyself worthy of the power of the Priestess! Thou hast had a revelation of the heart and demonstrated wisdom and hidden knowledge and power! Thou hast earned her Ultimate Priestess! Maso hast become Verdandi, Diviner of the Present!"
"I'm back, guys!" Maki tapped her heart. "I had a revelation of the heart."
Everyone smiled, the unnerving silence has passed them and their friendship blew louder in her soul. The wind stripped away Maso's habit and clothing, split her mask in half. The coveted woman, disrobed, leaving her roman gossamer sheet threaded around her lithe figure. She let her emerald hair flow. Her sacred face was like a sculpture, perfect in every aspect. Her skin glistened with sweat. Her body amplified her nimbus of brilliance. The Ultimate Priestess smiled in the sea of Maki Sonomura's soul. Her restraints broke as the girl found her path in life.
"Thank you, all of you." Setsuko said, embracing her daughter at her standing. "Thank you so much."
"Miss…I mean…Mom…I'm sorry." Maki apologized. "I've been bad. I remember it all now. I was so lonely being by myself. It hurt…I wanted to see you. I forgot you were working for my sake and I decided to hold a grudge. I'm so sorry and I mean, the real me, your true daughter, is so sorry."
"It's okay." She rubbed her daughter's head. "It's all right, Maki. I'm sorry, too."
Maki turned to Kei who had his back to her. "I'm sorry, Kei, Masao-kun, Nao-kun. Thank you very much."
"I should apologize to you, Sonomura." Kei replied. "I said some harsh things."
"Nanjo," Masao chuckled. "Dude…are you blushing?"
Kei strained his neck.
"He's just not used to be thanked." Yukino politely said to Kei's embarrassed chagrin.
"Yes, now, Todo, with Sonomura recovered shall we go?" Kei asked, quick to alleviate the flatter spotlight.
"Yeah, let's go, Nao-kun!"
"Mistress Maki-hee! Mistress Maki-hee! You're back! You're back!" Jack Frost jumped on his Mistress' shoulder.
"Jack Frost, Mistress Maki-ho is back! Mistress Maki-ho is back!" Pyro Jack joined his brother on Maki's opposite shoulder.
"Oh, you two," She caressed their bobbing heads. "I'm sorry I scared you. Let's go get you two back to Mai."
Maki gathered her bow and quiver stashed under the bedspread, barging through the exit, her energetic personality renewed. "Onward to the gingerbread house,"
Persona: Be Your True Mind
The reinvigorated Ideal Maki Sonomrua busted through the sweet sugary backdoor with such enthusiasm she almost crumbled it. The others were trailing her as she masterful fired arrow after arrow to deflect any demons that dared to gaze at her mother. The groups and conglomerates had died faded over their trekking in the Lost Forest, equal leveling the danger to their shoes.
Mai knotted her ribbon, her smile turned-on like a light switch when the Jack Bros shot right to her to bundle at her dimples. "Hee…you're back."
Setsuko went to her child daughter's side, no longer perturbed by the miniature demons. They were harmless.
"Hello, me," Maki greeted, her friends crowded in the enclosed candy closet.
"I'm sorry, me." Mai replied, putting the Jack Bros at her crossed legs.
"That's all right. I'm the one who should apologize." Maki adjusted her ribbon. "I'm sorry, me."
"Like, what is she sorry to the cutie for?" Ayase asked Brown.
"Beats me," Brown shrugged. "Maybe because she didn't take the facts of Maki's 'situation' well."
"More like, the defeat she held in her." Yukino stated.
"Yes," Eriko added. "Our heroine allowed herself to forfeit what she was ascribed to be, falling by the wayside at the eminent demise of this world, to be considered by Pandora."
"You're right, Eriko-chan!" Maki gleefully exclaimed. "I'm the Ideal Maki Sonomura. It's not like me to be so down. Now, Nao-kun filled me in…can you tell us where the last compact is?"
"Since when does, Sonomura take charge, Four-Eyes," Reiji hissed, chortling to himself.
Kei, bothered, glowered.
"Uh-huh." Mai nodded affirmatively. "The real me has it."
"The real you," Naoya repeated.
"Isn't that where we got the green one?" Masao asked, showing Mai the original green compact from his pocket. "I got that one and Nao's got this Maki's."
"Nope," Mai promptly replied. "That's the one from the real world. It has no magic here. The real me's consciousness left her body in the real world. Her consciousness is at the Alaya Cavern now. She has the last compact to unlock the gates."
"The Alaya Cavern," Maki said, thinking of the Alaya Shrine.
"It's behind the shrine." Mai informed.
"The Alaya Cavern, the real Sonomura's consciousness is in the Alaya Cavern." Kei resounded. "If her consciousness had left her body in the real world, transferred to the Ideal World, this may explain her low life signs. If we can return her consciousness to the real world, she would not require the coupling to the Deva System!"
"If Pandora reigns over this world, Kei," Eriko started.
"Pandora will destroy this world, Mister." Mai piped.
"Plus Maki's consciousness," Masao said.
"And us, Inaba." Reiji said. "We are viable casualties if shit goes sideways."
"We won't let it!" Naoya exclaimed. "We should hurry to the Alaya Shrine."
"Nao's right, as usual." Masao said, fishing out his hatchet. "The last compact, then to the school,"
"I'm…" Setsuko was clamoring for words, unable to keep a steady stride.
Maki titled her head to the side, then patted Mai. "Mom, would you please wait here with…heh…me?"
"Why?" Setsuko asked. "Why can't I go with you again?"
"I want to deal with this." Maki bound her with her hug. "It'll be okay. I have friends to help"
Setsuko received a kiss from her daughter. "All right, Maki...you'd better come back, do you hear me?"
"Don't worry, Ms. Sonomura, you'll see her again." Masao reassured.
"Hey, me," Maki looked at her younger version. "Look after Mom, okay?"
"Yep," Mai nodded. "I will. Be careful…me."
"Mistress Maki-hee! Can we-hee come to-ho?" The Jack Bros asked.
"Both of you," Maki asked. "Are you sure you want to leave Mai?"
"Please, me." Mai said. "Take them with you. I want them to help you."
"Okay, then." Maki crouched. "You have Mommy to keep you company, don't ya? That's all ya need, right? We can make a new contract, Jacks. Here,"
While Maki contracted the two demons as her new duo of Personas, Kei questioned Mai.
"When we obtain the third compact, how do we open the gates? Will they open up when we insert the three in the indentations on the floor panel?"
"When you have all three compacts, the energetic me has to chant the spell Erusaer Tsymmom in front of Pandora's door. That should open it."
"Aki's spell," Masao ejaculated. "Erusaer Tsymmom!"
"Like, what the hell language is it?" Ayase asked Brown.
"Probably some ancient Latin chanted by zealots." Brown said. "Probably translates to "to live is to die. (A/N) Something like that."
"Hm, Erusaer Tsymmom? Oh!" Setsuko exclaimed. "It's something I taught Maki when she was little. With her father dead and me busy with work, Maki was always alone when she wasn't with you and your family Naoya, when she was intermittently hospitalized. So I taught her this spell to chant when she was lonely at the hospital. I told her that wherever Mommy was, I could always sense her presence and she remembered it all this time."
Naoya was confused. "Aunt Setsuko I don't…"
"Try saving it backwards…" She answered.
He recited the letters in reverse. "Erusaer Tsymmom…Mommyst reasure…Mommys treasure…Mommy's treasure!"
"Yep and that girl's still my treasure." Setsuko confidently stated.
Maki concluded formulating her contracts, the two Jack Brothers nestled in their Spell Cards retracted in her sternum.
"Ready to go, Nao-kun," She informed.
"Then let's be on our way to the Alaya Cavern, Todo." Kei directed as he commonly did.
"Only my Ideal self can save the real me, Mister." Mai told Naoya.
Naoya ruffled her hair. "Man, I forgot how cute a kid you were, Maki."
Mai blushed.
"Stay with Aunt Setsuko, Mai, we can all have nice dreams soon."
Persona: Be Your True Mind
A/N: To die is to live in Spanish is morir es viviv. A common phrase constantly chanted by the Zealots in the castle area of Resident Evil 4. Though, you might have all ready known that.
Short chapter, very short chapter, it probably would have been even shorter if I didn't add all the characters proclamations of empathy and sympathy. Yes, Naoya and Masao stated they are jealous of each other, Kei referring to his parents, Yukino equating Maki's situation to the gang affiliation, Brown talking about betraying his friends to Yoshida, Ayase's autophobia confession, Reiji's similarity statement we all written by me to in a way tie together everyone past events to this amalgamation of a moment. Though each of their pasts and issues were indeed relevant to Maki's situation and suffering and responsibility in one way or another; they also served to demonstrate the camaraderie, friendship, bond what not between each of them. Maki's revelation is kinda of a halfhearted insertion, because this isn't the real Maki Sonomura so I can't simply create a flashback of her, so instead I used the game's actual scene as a crutch to elevate my purposes. This is technically her developing moment in the game where she has a literal revelation of the heart, she decides not to focus on what she has done and chooses to do something about.
For the record, I find it extremely weird that the true meaning behind the spell chanted by Aki is never actually revealed in the story scenes of the game. Basically what happens is you go into the room the scene ends with Mai telling Maki to chant the spell at the door to open it. Then when you can move around and talk to all the characters, if you talk to Setsuko she explains the meaning behind the spell. I don't know, just seems like an important thing to put in the story, so I had to suddenly throw it in there as best as I could.
I could have maybe shuffled this in with the last chapter, but honestly that chapters was already a bit too long for me and I couldn't add this to the next chapter because despite the fact I plan for it be to be short I have a suspicion, because the formula for this story is I go to write a short chapter and it becomes a pretty lengthy one, that the next chapter won't indeed be short.
I also technically was thinking of tying back into the mention of Maki's consciousness residing in the Alaya Cavern a the beginning by having her, using her own voice, to create the narrative of her life as kind of an explanation and maybe exactly what the idealize Maki felt when she saw her in the bed connected to the Deva System. I did actual write this, but decided it really didn't gel well with the rest of the chapter so I removed it. It was an offhand idea anyway, that kind of wasn't necessary. Wouldn't be the first time the first draft had to be deleted and start freshly. Thankfully that hasn't occurred on more than two occasions.
Before I sign off with you guys, on the subject of deleting first drafts, here's a little bit of a real author's note for you. Regarding Naoya and Masao stating their jealousy for each other's opposite characteristics, in Masao's chapter, chapter 15, in the initial planning of the story when I was not going to do revelations for the characters, I wasn't sure of having Chisato take control of Naoya and fight Masao but instead I was going to have Masao succumb to Chaos and actually willingly fight Naoya over Maki's affection. I decided not to, because I preferred the best buds relationship better and I couldn't really see Maki functionally being a great wedge between them especially since I planned forever that Naoya would only love her platonically. Kind of like a Mulder and Scully relationship. While our Nao and Mark are a true "got your back no matter what" relationship.
Either way I hope you enjoyed this chapter of Persona: Be Your True Mind and I'll see you next time for Chapter 27: Alaya Cavern: Naoya Todo.