Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets is owned by J.K. Rowling and Scholastic Press. This is a parody fanwork by fans for fans and no money was made off of the creation of this fanwork.

AN: Tom's words will indicated by being Bolded and Italicized

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The Super Secret Diary of Ginevra Molly Weasley

by FanficAllergy & RoseFyre

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October 1st, 1992

Dear Tom,

I am still super exhausted. I suppose I'm just not used to the school schedule yet.

That's very likely, dear Ginny. I know it took me a while to adjust to Hogwarts my first year. Things will work out. You just need to give them time and I'll help you.

That's great!

So how was your day?

Lousy as usual. But something good did happen today!

And what was that?

I managed to talk to one of my childhood friends, Luna Lovegood, and we're friends again! She has troubles with her roommates too. Which I don't really understand, I mean, Luna's kind of awesome. Yes, she's a little weird, but she's awesome! You'd like her, Tom.

I'm sure I would. Why is Luna so awesome?

She's really weird, but in a good way! She doesn't care what anyone else thinks of her and just does things her way. She's super smart and funny and she's really, really nice.

She sounds lovely.

She's the one who told me about wrackspurts, you know.

That isn't exactly a ringing endorsement.

You'd think that but when I told her about the clitoris and sex and how they weren't caused by wrackspurts she said that wrackspurts like to make people all fuzzy feeling they feed on fuzzy feelings and sex makes people all fuzzy feeling and so wrackspurts make people have sex so they can feed and babies are a direct form sex so in a way wrackspurts do lead to babies!

She sounds interesting.

She really is, Tom! I'm so happy we got a chance to talk. She didn't even mind that I fell asleep in history class again unlike Meggie McLaggan. And she even shared her history notes with me after I fell asleep. But it wasn't all my fault! Everyone falls asleep in history class. Binns is sooooooooo boring.

Yes. Binns is rather boring, isn't he?

You know him too?

Binns was a ghost when I was a student.

Wow, Tom! You went to school at Hogwarts?

Yes, during the war with Grindelwald.

That's a long time ago, Tom.

Yes, it is.

That's almost fifty years ago! He's been a ghost that long?

Longer. According to Hogwarts: A History, he has been a ghost since the late 1870s.

Wow, I wonder if anyone remembers him when he wasn't a ghost.

Dumbledore might. He is quite ancient, you know.

I guess. I'm not really comfortable with talking to the headmaster. He's a little odd.

I agree with that sentiment. Do not worry, there's no reason the headmaster should need to talk to a first year student unless said student does something especially egregious.

Tom, since you were a student at Hogwarts, and you seem to know a lot, maybe you could, um, maybe help me out with my homework? So I don't get behind, since I keep falling asleep in class.

It would be my pleasure, Ginny.

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AN:

We made up when Binns became a ghost. It isn't explicitly stated in canon when this happened just that he's been a ghost for a very long time and predates the Marauders.

We hope you enjoyed!