Decided to put reviews to use – someone gave me a wonderful tidbit on Timelord sleeping habits, very interesting and if I had a timelord sleeping habits I'd be acing my degree right now! Anyway you got me thinking how grumpy the Doctor would be after going too long without sleep so… here you go and thanks :P
Chapter Six
The Doctors sleeping habits intrigued Clara half the time. He told her he only required an hours sleep a day to remain fully functional, though he did say on occasions when he was bored he slept longer, and could go several days without sleep. However it was disturbing when he had gone for days without sleeping and was beginning to wear down. He started to act like a toddler in need of a nap – and looked like someone with a hangover.
Clara tried not to crack a smile when he yawned again.
The remaining couples at the retreat – two having left since the deaths of the Knights previously – where sitting back in the main room having what Clara still dubbed 'circle time'. Clara had spotted Jenny and Vastra doing their best not to crack smiles when it had been the Doctor and Clara's turn to complain about each other – an activity Clara had found rather cathartic though she was sure half the couples where confused by her complaints as they were about the Doctors. Their weird complains about the other where upstaged however when Jenny complained (jokingly, probably) about Vastra 'shedding'.
During a break Clara stood by the fire trying to thaw out her hands which where stiff from cold – she missed central heating – and tried to think about their plan for getting rid of the lake monster that night. The more she went over the plan in her head the less nervous she felt. She was so busy thinking she hardly noticed being joined by another woman – the one who kept glaring at Jenny and Vastra.
"Your husband seems quite nice." The woman said.
Clara blinked in what was probably a dumb way before she remembered that the Doctor was supposed to be her husband. "Oh yes, he is."
"A Doctor is he?"
"One of the best." She didn't lie – she just didn't make any specifications about whether he was a medical doctor or not.
The woman eyed Clara up and down in a way that made her self-conscious. "Quite the age difference between you two isn't there? Not that it matters."
Clara frowned, her back straightened defensively and she tried not to just snap at the woman. "No it doesn't matter." She said trying not to grit her teeth.
The woman obviously noticed Clara's irritation with the question, but she didn't apologise. Instead she continued down the malicious line of questioning. "Funny how most men would be all over a pretty young thing like you – but he's not touched you. No wonder you're trying to repair your relationship if he doesn't want you."
And hand curled around Clara's waist and drew her closer to a hard body. Clara peered up at the Doctor through her eyelashes and saw he was just giving the other woman an irritated glare and holding a glass of ice water in his other hand. "Ever thought maybe we are just more private about intimacy Madame?" the Doctors voice was more growling than he probably meant it – it was a side-effect of his lack of sleep too.
Still his voice and words made the other woman go away so Clara didn't bother to point it out to him.
"Thanks, love" Clara smiled giving him the endearing word.
"No problem ghrá" he replied, still not having looked down.
Clara turned her gaze back to the fire. "Suppose we're not very good at acting married are we?" she smiled softly at the flames – they'd known it'd be a long shot anyway.
She felt the Doctor shrug beside her. "Not sure, Timelord marriages are pretty different from human ones."
Clara looked at him again. "You've been married to humans before."
He snorted "Not sure you noticed but not one of them was what you would call a conventional human marriage."
Clara considered that before asking "What do you think a human marriage is like?"
Startled by her question the Doctor finally actually looked at her, seeing curiosity in her wide eyes as usual. "Love. I guess anyway. I would hope it is two people who love each other and would do anything to keep the other happy. And children of course – most marriages have children."
Clara smiled softly. "If all marriages where like that the world would probably be a happier place." She sighed, then thought of another question. "Have you ever wanted an actual marriage?"
The Doctor looked even more startled than before, but a certainty that she was not asking what a part of him worried about let him continue to joke with her. "Why, are you asking Miss Oswald?"
Clara blushed, opening her mouth and closing it again twice before she thought of a reply. "N-no, no! You'd probably not even be able to sit through the ceremony your so impatient anyway."
"It sure sounded like you were asking." The Doctor teased further getting amused by her blushing and stuttering.
Clara, aware he was having fun at her expense, she decided to tease him in return. "Sounds like you want me to ask Doctor. If I had been asking what would you have said anyway?"
He stopped chuckling beside her and looked down in shock, seeing her staring back up at him with a grin he couldn't help but tap her nose with the side of his glass "Alright enough of that, we'll just tie ourselves up in questions."
"You started it." Clara hissed, catching sight of Madame Vastra and Jenny coming back inside from the outdoors – the lizard lady and her wife made a bee line for them, not missing how close the pair stood as they smiled softly, the Doctors arm draped loosely around Clara middle holding her to him.
"Everything is set for tonight Doctor" Jenny greeted in a low voice.
"Yes, Strax is waiting by the TARDIS." Madame Vastra added.
"I hope you told him not to try storm the doors. She can have quite a temper when she thinks I'm not looking." The Doctor turned to a window as if he could see where his precious box and the sontaran stood.
"Oh I'm sure he won't think of it, he was far more interested in hunting squirrels. Says they make good moving targets." Vastra assured him. "Anyway he's ready to move on our signal – have you got everything you need ready?"
"Of course" the Doctor patted his jacket pocked.
They all turned expectantly to Clara who just shrugged and like the day before lifted her skirt just high enough for them to see running shoes and a pair of trousers under the skirt. Jenny had let her borrow one of the skirts that could be easily ripped off so she could run with ease when she needed too.
"All se then" Vastra looked eager "We shall see you outside after dark then shall we?"
Thankfully it didn't rain. Clara had felt nervous that their entire plan practically hinged on the idea of it not raining – in the north east of England in November, which was pretty much one of the dampest places on planet earth. She caught herself thanking this god and the next while she crouched in her dark spot by the trees, well away from the water, the beginning trail of very dry pine branches at her feet and a box of matches in one hand.
The Doctor had inside she stay away from the main danger – she'd felt offended at first but there was no use arguing with a grumpy timelord so she settled for her role in their plan sitting by Vastra in the dark watching the Doctor and Jenny playing bait.
Vastra was awful quiet and frozen in that way reptiles could, Clara had to keep checking she was still beside her. the lizard lady did keep passing Clara a pair of night vision goggles the Doctor had let them borrow from the TARDIS however so she didn't feel too out of her depth in the dark.
"Something's moving." Vastra suddenly breathed, making Clara jump. "In the water, just behind them I swore I saw something."
"Should I give the first signal?"
"I think it's better to be safe than sorry."
Clara lit the first match on the second strike, waving it slowly up and down until the match burnt her finger and she blew it out. "Did they get it?"
Vastra paused to look through the goggles. "Yes, they're walking from the water and… yes it's following them!" she passed Clara the goggles long enough for her to see the beast that had been doing this.
It looked almost like a frog except for the long, long neck and the mouth full of blunt teeth and somehow managed to look worse than if they were sharp. Clara shuddered not enjoying the look of the thing and passed the goggles back to Vastra so she could concentrate on her part of the plan. She waited for Vastra's signal.
"Now Clara!" she yelled even though she was right beside her – she must have been more nervous than she thought. Clara struck a match – taking two turns because her hands where shaking – before the match lit and she threw it onto the dry branches which lit up faster than expected following the trail of branches around the lake and cutting the monster off from its home and hiding place. It let out a distressed wail of course when it tried to return to the water after realising something was wrong but was blocked by the wall of flame.
Clara saw the Doctor crouch a little way from the beast taking the little globe he'd gotten from the TARDIS out of his pocket he set it on the ground and began to sonic it – watching as the globe steadily grew bigger, the scene of a red sand beach and thick grey sea with curling waves was visible through the growing glass, but the beast hadn't seen it yet. It was too busy trying to get to the lake behind the flame.
Strax came out of the wood on one side of the beast waving flames, while Clara and Madame Vastra chose flaming branches of their own in an attempt to herd the beast from their side. It worked for the most part – Jenny got swept away by the beasts flailing tail and Clara saw and heard Vastra give a worried gasp in response but she never stopped waving the flame at the beast, in fact the lizard woman managed to move so she was between it and Jenny who seemed to be winded on the ground.
Clara mustn't have looked like much of a threat even brandishing two flaming pine branches because the beast eyed her before charging.
"'ey beastie!" the Doctors Scottish voice practically bellowed into the night, loud and demandingly ferocious enough to stop the beast running at Clara (or maybe it hesitated and turned at the last second, she'd blinked and missed it). But it caught its attention and it saw the little globe that had grown to be near the size of a house and showed the alien beach – a body of water free from flame that attracted the beast immediately. As the Doctor predicted, it charged right through the glass and once the tip of its tail had gone through the glass he stopped sonicing the globe and watched as it began to shrink in size rapidly again.
Thankfully in the time it took for the fire service to arrive, the globe was pocket size again and the five of them had just enough time to make themselves look innocent of the flames around the lake which were quickly put out.
The Doctor held up the globe, letting them all see the beach scene inside now complete with bone sucking monster.
"You never told me what that globe actually is." Clara said wrinkling her nose with distaste at the alien beast inside.
"Eh it's like a prison. More of a habitat." The Doctor shrugged. "They never became a bit thing – scientists still preferred to dissect animals rather than study them in an environment. They mostly get used for butterfly collecting and things."
"So it'd be like a snow globe with a live butterfly in it?" Clara smiled "that actually sounds pretty cool."
"Well this one has a slimly bone munching monster in it…"
"Yeah you can keep that one, not so pretty." Clara grinned.
The rest of the couples retreat group had come out to see what the commotion was. Their hosts. Heather and Stephen, stood closet to them, so Vastra flagged them down. "Sir, Ma'am we've very much enjoyed your retreat but we're going to leave early – this has all been rather much on us and London is calling."
Heather and Stephen looked affronted. "But you can't leave, you still have three days left. Think about how your marriage could benefit! We haven't even gotten to your obvious fear of removing your veil!"
Vastra gave an exasperated sigh and removed her veil right then, causing the two hosts to step back in shock. "Honestly, our marriage is perfectly fine. We just came for a – a holiday right dear?" she smiled at Jenny, who smiled back still rubbing her chest from being winded earlier.
"B-but what about those two?" Heather pointed at Clara and the Doctor. "They have more issues than any couple I've seen. Obvious secrets, arguing and a lack of intimacy they have more than enough reason to stay if they ever hope to be a successful couple! They haven't even held hands or kissed or anything – there's not even a wedding band on their fingers!"
Clara tried to open her mouth and admit they weren't even married. The Doctor however rolled his eyes as though tiered with all this – he was actually exhausted, not that anyone seemed to care as they continued arguing, he grabbed Clara suddenly and she squeaked in shock when he pressed a forceful but gentle kiss to her lips, lasting just long enough for her to relax a bit as he nipped at her bottom lip before pulling away to the silence of the crowd. He turned his eye on Heather and Stephen. "There, we kissed – our relationship if fine, we proved that enough for you? Thanks! Bye now."
He turned and began marching away, stopping only to all over his shoulder " Madame Vastra I suggest if you would like a ride back to London you hurry along – I'm very tiered and would like to get some rest, Clara can fly you home though- I've not slept in a week and would like an hour or two to myself!"
Clara was sure she was in far too much shock to fly anyone anywhere anytime soon, but she stumbled along after them anyway trying not to grin and touch her lips like a lovesick school girl.