His arms ached but for some reason all Jack could do was smile, the image of Brianne had been permantly glued into his conscious for the last three days, she had acted normal after that one night blaming it on tiredness and an upset stomach. He still couldn't believe how mad this girl had made him there was scarcely a minute when she wasn't on his brain.

Making what he was going to ask her tonight an even easier choice.

He went to dig his shovel into the soil but was interrupted by a cool drink of water pressed to his lips.

"Hello Mr. Dawkins."

He grinned turning to face her. She looked beautiful today, she had braided her hair into a side braid reminding him of plaited fire. She had even changed clothes now wearing a purplish skirt and white blouse.

He didn't care if she wouldn't like it he kissed her. She moaned allowing it but quickly pulled away. "Jack!"

"What a fella loves his girl can't he kiss her?"

She blushed quickly raising the gourd to his lips. He drank greedily savouring each and every droplet of the sweet refreshing water. When he had drank the spoon dry he looped his arms around her waist. "And I do love you, Brianne Kelly."

"I know you do Jack Dawkins."

He took awhile just to glance into her eyes. He already knew she would say yes after all when two people loved each other as much they loved each other how couldn't they want to be together? His spine tingled just thinking about it. "I want to talk to you after work."

"Okay."

He gave her shoulders a quick pat then grinned. "Go on then I can't be the only one looking at your pretty face."

All though soon that pretty face would soon be his forever.

He had been quiet tonight, barely walking and getting lost at every simple distraction. His hand held loosely onto her arm like it was about to fall at any moment if she didn't remind him where he was. Brianne had never seen Jack in a daze before he was always so lively joking and begging for kisses what had got him like this? She had checked him for signs of sun fever but he seemed perfectly healthy.

"Love." He said voice quiet and distant. "Let's sit down."

She nodded allowing him to lead her to their tree. Glancing over his shoulder then glancing again he sat down then took her hand. "You love me right?"

"Of course I do."

"Oh good."

He gulped then lowered his gaze to the ground. His mouth moved silently as if he was praying...finally he moved his gaze back up to her resting his free palm on her lap. "I love you very much and-well this ain't an easy question Brianne."

"What is?"

"This."

He was acting odd...had he found out about her past somehow? Did he know and was now bursting with her secret begging God in heaven to let it not be true. She would never forgive Mary if she had told him, never forgive herself if she lied to him again. "What Jack?" she leaned back against the tree bracing herself.

"Well I-" He reached for her hair but she quickly jerked back. She could tell the question was gone now replaced with a pained curiosity "Why don't you let me touch your hair?"

vindictively his hand rubbed her hair savouring it with a cruel malice. He eyed the bruise on her cheek now smiling with the pride and satisfaction of a job well done. He always had this routine after beating her, the touch of her tresses his prize and final move of hatred before abandoning her to the bottle. Grinning her husband dropped the fiery strand then turned towards the door...

She gulped the bitter memory away then forced herself to shrug. "I-I just don't like it..."

He eyed her suspiciously but shook his head. "Anyways I want to ask you something..." his smile grew warming her belly. "I've never been the type for long term commitments but-I love you so much Brianne and I want to spend the rest of my life with you..."

no, no not this not now. His eyes grew with the excitement and joy that could only come from a man asking a woman that type of question. A question she could never justly fulfill..

He squeezed her hand scotching even closer to her lap."Brianne Kelly will you-"

"No!" She pulled away from his embrace feeling heat rise to her cheeks. "I mean I-"

She came to her feet hearing a loud rip. Glancing backwards she saw the shredded remains of her white blouse hanging from a small wayward branch. She blushed harder now taking another step away from him. "I can't marry you I-I can't even love you. This is wrong Jack, so wrong I-"

"I thought you said you loved me." His face was flushed with hurt.

"I-I do-I did. But I can't Jack I can't..."

"But you love me, you love me."

Lord did she love him and there was nothing more than what she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him but she was still married to John, no matter how much she wanted not to be.

She was crying now thick heavy tears that couldn't be stopped no matter how hard she tried. "I can't love you Jack. It was wrong of me to do so and-I have to go."

She turned on her heal but was quickly grabbed. "You love me Brianne Kelly you know you do."

"I can't love you Jack."

"Why not?"

She had never heard a voice laced with so much pain. He really did love her but she couldn't love him justly back when she was a married woman.

"Because I-" Oh how she yearned to tell him, that way maybe he could understand, forgive her but she couldn't. To open up about that much pain get that personal about something that had hurt her so much-she couldn't do it... "I just can't."

She pulled loose of his grasp then sprinted towards home.

He watched her run, tears stinging his eyes. She had loved him, and he had loved her, lord did he love her.

He had been so sure she would say yes, after all wasn't marriage what every girl wanted-every girl wanted marriage to a dashing respectable heir, not a dirty street rat.

His eyes shifted from her braid to a pale white bare back covered in dozes of fat pink scars.