Disclaimer: I don't own anything Star Trek it is all property of Gene Roddenberry, J.J. Abrams, Paramount, and whoever else owns rights to the franchise. I am not making any profits off of this so please don't sue me.

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Chapter 23

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" So you told him about us? About everything that happened?" Jim asked quietly as he looked down at Spock.

He and Spock were currently reclined on the bed in Jim's bedroom area in Sarek's house with Spock resting his head against the center of Jim's chest. Spock lifted his head away, with some reluctance, and looked up to meet Jim's slightly troubled gaze and spoke.

" Yes Jim, I have informed my father of the true nature of our relationship after he made inquiries, which subsequently led to me revealing the events that transpired which led to our separation and reconciliation." Spock replied.

" Are you angry with me for doing this Jim?" He asked.

Jim was silent for a few moments before he shook his head and spoke.

" No Spock, I'm not mad or anything just... How did your father take it all?" He asked, uncertainty tinting his words.

" Jim if you are fearing that my father is displeased with our relationship, then let me assure you that that is definitely not the case. My father is accepting of us, quite accepting in fact." Spock explained.

He watched as Jim's entire being seemed do sigh in relief, but a moment later he was tensing up again as he spoke.

" But what about the rest of it? How did he take it when you told him about... you know?" Jim asked, a pained look passing across his face at mentioning the dark time he had suffered through, on some level was still trying to get through.

" My father was quite... appalled when I recounted what happened to you, and the part I played I played in adding to your misery by my foolish abandonment of you when you needed me most. My father made it quite clear how disgusted he was by how I treated you, and he expressed a desire to apologize to you himself." Spock explained. He watched as Jim's mouth fell open and a look of shock filled his handsome face.

" Wha-what do you mean your dad wants to apologize to me?" Jim asked when his voice returned to him.

" I believe that as my father, he wishes to apologize for the gross errors that I committed against you." Spock explained.

" But that doesn't make sense, your father has never done anything wrong by me." Jim said.

" I am in agreement with you Jim, my actions against you were my own and yet... I believe my father is under the pretense that as he is my parent and I his child, my shame... is his shame." Spock said softly, not for the first time feeling shame for the pain he had already inflicted on Jim, but now also feeling shame for the pain he had now caused his father after he had revealed the truth to him no more than a couple of hours earlier.

" I gotta go talk to him." Jim said, moving to get up. However, his actions were immediately halted when Spock minutely tightened his grip around Jim and shook his head.

" I am well aware that you would have a strong desire to speak with my father after I told you everything, but I must advise against this." Spock said.

" But why Spock?" Jim asked as he lay back down on the bed.

" I do not think my father would be particularly receptive to words of any kind at the moment. He did verbally reprimand me for the things I did, and afterwards he told me that he desired to meditate for a certain number of hours to process everything he had been made aware of today. I am sorry Jim, but you will have to wait." Spock explained.

Jim let out a small sigh as disappointment clouded his features, but then he looked up and saw the way Spock was gazing at him. Though his face was kept with most of the Vulcan neutrality, Spock could not keep everything he was feeling from shining through in his eyes. Jim could see the shame, guilt, and heartache swirling about in Spock's eyes. Feeling his own sadness rise up within his heart, Jim reached up and gently cupped Spock's cheek before he spoke.

" Are you okay?" He asked quietly while he lightly rubbed his thumb over the curve of Spock's high cheekbone.

Spock's whole body seemed to sigh as he leaned into Jim's warm touch before he nodded and spoke.

" I am well Jim." He said softly.

" But?" Jim asked.

" But I am seeing yet another consequence of my foolishness. My father has been deeply affected by what I have confessed to him, and though he is pleased that I have been making amends to you, and that we are together, he is very disappointed in me and he..." Spock trailed off, suddenly finding it difficult to speak.

" And he what Spock?" Jim asked, his own voice tinged with sadness.

" And he feels my mother's absence now more than any other time. " Spock answered softly.

No sooner had Spock said these words, he suddenly found himself wrapped in a tight embrace as Jim proceeded to squeeze him rather hard.

" I'm so sorry Spock." Jim said against Spock's neck.

Spock fervently returned Jim's embrace and after he let out a shaky breath he spoke.

" Why do you apologize Jim?" Spock asked into Jim's golden hair. "You have not done anything wrong."

" I guess it's just me being the illogical human you know and love Spock." Jim replied before he let out a slightly watery half-laugh and continued.

" Even with all that time that has passed, I still wish that I had been just a little bit faster when me and Sulu were on that drill, that I had stopped it before-Mmmph."

The rest of what Jim wanted to say was immediately halted by Spock's lips gently pressing against his own in a deep yet chaste kiss. It effectively stunned Jim into silence. Spock drew back and nearly smiled at the slightly dazed look on Jim's face before he spoke.

" No Jim, do not apologize for that which was well beyond your control. There was nothing more you could have done, than what you did do. You actions were valiant, and you saved Lt. Sulu's life." Spock said softly, almost whispering.

" Well, let's not forget Chekov and his totally awesome transporter locking skills." Jim smiled as he blinked away the sudden moister that had accumulated in his eyes.

" Indeed, I owe the young Ensign a great deal for saving he who has become the love of my life." Spock said, meaning it with all the fiber of his being.

He watched as Jim grinned wide before he ducked his head in a futile attempt to hide the color that had filled his cheeks at Spock's declaration of love.

" Since when did you become such a romantic?" Jim asked when he looked back up to meet Spock's dark-eyed gaze.

" Since I threw away the best thing, the best person in my life and was somehow allowed to gain him back." Spock answered truthfully.

Jim's grin softened to a warm smile before he leaned in and pressed his lips to Spock's. He waited for the Vulcan to respond in kind to him before he deepened the kiss into something that was not very chaste, yet not all the way there yet to heated passion. It was a happy medium that Spock, after a moment of surprise, was more than pleased to partake in fully. When they drew back several moments later, Jim was breathing a little harder than normal, and there was a pale green flush to Spock's cheeks and the tips of his pointed ears.

" I'm glad that I'm here with you." Jim whispered.

" As am I." Spock replied.

Jim smiled brightly before a mischievous glint filled his eyes. Spock had enough time to notice this glint before he was letting out a very Un-Vulcan-like yelp as Jim skillfully switched their positions so that he was on top and Spock found himself effectively, yet gently pinned.

Jim smiled down at Spock before he spoke.

" Now, enough of this dwelling in the past. You, Mr. Spock, are going to tell me what I have to look forward to here on New Vulcan since we're gonna be here for a whole month, and knowing you, I'd like as much detail as possible." He said before he leaned in dangerously close, to where his lips almost grazed Spock's as he continued.

" So get to it Commander."

Spock reached up and slowly wrapped his arms around Jim, his pale, long-fingered hands splaying across the small of Jim's back, lightly pressing the human closer to him and earning a small gasp from said human as he spoke.

" Yes Captain, what ever you command." Spock rumbled deeply.

A good hour and a half later...

Jim tried to be as quiet as he could while he slowly walked down one of the hallways of Sarek's residence. He had left Spock to his light meditation back in their shared quarters. Now Jim was on the lookout for the other Vulcan he was going to be living with. As he walked Jim took his surroundings, once again appreciating the simple yet elegant decor of Sarek's home. When Jim reached the end of the hallway that led to the common area, he decided to go down one of the hallways that began on the opposite side of the area as he continued to search for Spock's father.

Jim's instincts proved fruitful as he entered the hallway and caught sight of a dim light coming from one of the open arched doorways just a little ways ahead of him. Jim felt a wave of unbidden nervousness rise up inside himself as he slowly made his way towards the door. Jim didn't have a clue as to what to expect. He didn't even know if he would even find Sarek in the room itself, and if he did, what kind of reception he would receive. Spock had warned him after all, and now Jim was wondering if he had waited enough before embarking on this pseudo-mission to have a heart to heart with his lover's father.

When he had just about reached the door, Jim stood beside it out of sight so that he could gather his nerves. Jim took a moment to snort at himself in derision, he was the famed Captain of the USS Enterprise, and man who had faced down some terrifying situations and lived to tell the tale, Hell, he along with the rest of his crew and saved Earth from eminent destruction from a deranged Romulan. from the future. He had faced all that and yet here he was, hesitating at the doorway when it came to facing the father of his lover.

Naturally the self-derision was soon morphing into silent determination. There was no way he was backing down, not when there was so much that needed to be said and clarified. With this in mind, Jim steadied his nerve and took that first step forward. Jim slowly moved forward, turning as he did so into the arched-threshold.

The moment his eyes settled on the interior of the room, Jim felt himself fresh involuntarily for a fleeting moment before he forced himself to stand where he was and relax just a little.

There, seated Indian style on a simple, pale green mat on the floor was Sarek. Spock's father had his back to Jim, and was sitting unnervingly still. The room itself was what Jim assumed was Sarek's meditation room. The room itself had an alcove like quality to it, as though it were a sanctuary for Sarek to retreat to after a long and hot day. The walls were made of a slightly darker hued stone than the rest of the house was, and there were pale green and deep amber Vulcan tapestries hanging from them. The light that was illuminating the room came from what appeared to be candles encased in glass, but as Jim looked closer he saw that they were indeed not really candles but some kind of fire-less lantern. Several of these cylindrical lights adorned the wall that Sarek was facing. Before Jim could look any further, a deep and quiet voice rang out, effectively startling him.

" Please come in James, there is no need for you to simple stand in the doorway." Sarek said without turning from where he sat.

" Yes sir, sorry... I didn't mean to gawk or anything." Jim said quickly, his voice sounding way too loud in his own ears as he hurriedly stepped into the room.

Gathering his wits about him in record time, Jim noticed the extra meditation mats that were neatly rolled up and stacked neatly into a pyramid shape against the wall that was to Sarek's right. Jim made a qiuck B-line and grabbed one of these mats. Sarek turned his head slightly so that he could watch the human in his company. Though he remained almost perfectly still and blank-faced, Sarek was internally surprised by the actions he was seeing Jim take.

Sarek watched on wordlessly and Jim came to stand beside him where he sat, before gracefully sinking to his knees and setting the rolled up mat on the floor in front of him. Within a few seconds Jim had the mat unrolled and was taking his seat on it. Jim sat cross-legged on the mat and settled himself, but when he looked up at the wall where the lights were, he froze when he saw what was there among the glass cylinders.

There situation on a shelf at the very center of the many cylindrical lights was a medium-sized holo-picture frame of a stunning human woman with dark brown hair, a bright smile, and deep, almost black eyes that were exactly like Spock.

Spock's mother, Amanda Grayson.

Though he had seen a pictures of her that Spock possessed, he had never seen this particular portrait. She looked absolutely gorgeous. Seeing this woman's image, knowing who she was to both Sarek and Spock, and remembering why all he could do no was gaze at her portrait instead of see her in person had Jim's eyes burning despite himself.

From where he sat beside Jim, Sarek was silently taken aback by the sadness that had filled Jim's features within the span of a few seconds. It didn't take Sarek long to figure out why as he saw how Jim was looking at Amanda's portrait. Despite all of his Vulcan sensibility, Sarek found himself feeling a myriad of strong emotions as he gazed at his young, albeit unexpected companion.

To see the depth of sadness held in Jim's striking blue eyes made Sarek look at the young human with a silent, renewed respect, but it also made the Vulcan curious as to the reason why Jim looked so saddened, besides the obvious reason in that Amanda had perished with Vulcan.

" James?" Sarek asked quietly to get the young man's attention.

" Yes sir?" Jim replied as he pried his gaze away from the portrait of Spock's mother.

" Have you taken your rest?" Sarek asked.

" Yes sir, I am very well rested." Jim answered with a fleeting smile before he quickly sobered and continued.

" Spock and I talked for a while shortly after he came back to our quarters."

" Indeed, what has my son told you?" Sarek asked.

" He told me that you wished to apologize to me." Jim replied before he continued.

" With all due respect sir, I personally can't figure out why you would think this way."

" Is it not obvious to you James? I wish to apologize on behalf of my son for the gross way he had treated you." Sarek answered.

Jim sighed heavily and shook his head before he gazed up at Sarek with sad blue eyes and spoke.

" Sir, please don't do that. You can't blame yourself for what happened between Spock and me." Jim said quietly. " What happened between us, that was on him, and on me."

" What do you mean by that Jim, what role did you play in the way my son behaved with you?" Sarek asked confusion barely tinting his neutral tone.

" What I mean is that I think that things maybe would've turned out way different, and maybe less disastrous had I not cultivated such a reputation of being so... sexually active." Jim explained with a light blush of embarrassment filling his cheeks.

At this, Sarek raised one of his dark, elegant eyebrows, Jim had to keep from grinning because he now knew where Spock learned it from, and spoke.

" I take it that this so-called reputation is mostly exaggerated then?" Sarek asked.

" The downside of being so flirtatious by nature, people start making assumptions." Jim said flatly.

" Be that as it may James, it plays a very little part in the fact that Spock was one to make such an assumption about you, despite the fact that the both of you were in a monogamous relationship at the time." Sarek said gravely before he looked away and continued.

" I am having... difficulty in processing what I have been made aware of today."

" I know, and I am so sorry." Jim said, meaning it whole-heartedly. Then he took a deep breath and continued.

" Sarek?" He asked and waited for the Vulcan to meet his gaze before he continued.

" Your son made a mistake, a pretty big one at that, but I want you to know that I have forgiven him for the way he treated me, and that he has done a great deal to make things right between us." Jim said, all the while feeling his throat starting to constrict. Jim battled it all back and continued, saying what he really needed to say.

" I love him." Jim said softly, letting out a slightly watery huff before he continued. " I know that what happened between us should've broken us beyond any kind of repair, but we... we managed to somehow make it back to each other. I just... I don't want what happened to end up destroying things between the both of you."

When Jim's soft voice trailed away, a deep silence descended over the meditation room. While Jim sat wondering if he had just said the absolute worst thing he could have said to the father of the person he loved, Sarek sat staring at Jim, feeling something akin to awe within his very katra. Out of everything he had expected to come out of Jim's mouth, Sarek had not expected that.

Such selflessness and earnestness coming from one that many thought of as youthfully brash and arrogant. It made Sarek see Jim anew, and it served to also remind Sarek of someone else he knew, who had held the same qualities of selflessness and earnestness.

She whom he had loved, and unfortunately, lost.

In that moment the similarities Sarek saw between the young man sitting before him, and the wife who had been viciously ripped away from by a lone madman's actions were staggering, and the emotions this brought up inside him were like a great deluge straight to his very katra itself. It took all of Sarek's Vulcan discipline to keep his composure in tact and once he was sure that he would not loss said composure and most likely have James running out of the room in search of emergency medical assistance, Sarek spoke.

" Again, as I told my son in our earlier conversation, the human capacity to forgive and now the capacity to love shall forever be something I will regard as remarkable." Sarek said quietly.

" Sir I-" Jim wanted to tell Sarek that there was nothing remarkable about anything he had done when Sarek had held up his hand and effectively silence him.

" James, let me assure you that, while I find his actions to be horrendously deplorable, Spock is my son and this he shall always be. As I told him, it is the way that he had acted that has garnered my deep disappointment, not he himself. It will take me some time to process everything that I have learned today, but I shall not turn Spock, or you from my house." Sarek said firmly.

Jim smiled softly, a relieved smile if anything else, and nodded mutely before he turned his attention back to Amanda's picture. Taking in a deep breath, Jim drew his knees up into his chest and wrapped his arms around them before he spoke.

" Spock has her eyes." Jim said quietly as he smiled deeply.

" Indeed." Sarek replied as he too looked to his late wife's image. " When she and I first met all those years ago, it were her eyes that had first captivated me."

" And the rest of her captivated you I take it?" Jim said with a playful smirk.

Sarek turned to meet Jim's warm gaze and quirked his elegant brow once more, as though to silently say What do you think kid?

Jim grinned widely before he turned back to the portrait. As he stared at the image of the late Amanda Grayson, Jim found his smile quickly dissipating, replaced with sadness.

" She must have been an extraordinary woman." Jim sighed.

" Indeed, she was... an exceptional bondmate to me, and an even more exemplary mother to Spock." Sarek said without any shame for showing such sentimentality.

Sarek watched as a rueful expression filled Jim's features. Though he was indeed very curious as to why Jim's expression became such, Sarek remained silent, not wanting to pry. He needn't have worried because the next words that came out of Jim's mouth would answer his silent question.

" I've never told Spock this but, I've always been kind of envious of him in this aspect." Jim said with a humorless chuckle.

" To what aspect are you referring to Jim?" Sarek asked.

" That he grew up with a mother who could smile like that." Jim answered as he gestured at Amanda's picture.

Sarek mulled over Jim's words carefully before he spoke.

" I take it that the motherly affection that alway seemed inherent in my wife was not to be found in she who is your mother?" He asked neutrally.

" No sir, I can't say that it was." Jim said as he turned to give Sarek a wan smile. " All my mother every saw in me was a painful reminder of the husband she lost."

Jim paused to take a deep breath and sighed before he shook his head and continued.

" Nero screwed up my life first before he set his sights on you and your people. From the few pictures I've seen of him, I am almost an exact duplicate of my father. I think it's why my mother couldn't really look at me, why she would run off to some deep space mission with Starfleet whenever she could while I was growing up."

Jim trailed off into silence as memories of a childhood that had been empty and overshadowed by the specter of a dead father filled his mind.

Sarek sat and regarded the young man before him. Indeed, Jim was young by many standard, and yet in his relatively short life he had endured a great deal. It effectively boggled Sarek's mind that someone like Jim, who had from what Sarek was quickly deducing, had been dealt a great deal of pain by those closest to him, could still have such a bright quality to him, and be such a good man. Taking in a small breath himself, Sarek spoke.

" It would seem that the event that transpired between yourself and my son was not the first instance of... abandonment you have experienced." He stated quietly.

" No sir, it most definitely was not. In addition to a mother who would rather be up in the stars with the memory of her dead husband, I also have a brother who ran away from home when I was eleven and left me behind, and a string of dead-beat step-fathers who were either to drunk to notice I existed, or said it straight to my face that they wanted nothing to do with me." Jim said with a humorless smirk and anger marring his tone.

But just as quickly as the anger had filled Jim's voice, Jim was deflating and shaking his head in disgust at himself.

" Listen to me going on about my crappy upbringing, to my boyfriend's dad no less." Jim said before he sent Sarek an apologetic look. " I'm sorry, I didn't mean to talk you ear off sir."

" James, let me assure you that this conversation has in no way led to the detachment of either of my ears from my head." Sarek said with absolute serious.

Before he could stop himself, Jim was throwing his head back and letting out a fully, belly laugh. Sarek gazed at Jim while he laughed, wondering what was so amusing since he had merely stated a fact, and also noticing that Jim's already aesthetically pleasing features seemed amplified now that they were filled with mirth.

" Oh man, now I see who Spock get's it from." Jim chuckled once he had reigned in his laughter.

" To what exactly are you referring to James?" Sarek asked.

" I'm sorry if my emotional outburst made you uncomfortable sir, it's just that, Spock has a way of taking some of what I say rhetorically literally just like you did a few seconds ago." Jim said with a warm smile.

" Well, I am his father after all, certain traits are naturally passed on." Sarek said.

" Yes, and that particular trait always makes me smile."Jim admitted.

" I am pleased that you view it so positively. And as for what you said before, rest assured that all that you have revealed to me was by no means a waste of time. I am, gratified that you were willing to share such details about you past." Sarek said, before his eye shuttered somewhat as he continued.

" However, it does dishearten me a great deal to know that my son is among those who abandoned you." He said while his eyes momentarily went to the floor before traveling back up to meet Jim's striking blue gaze.

Jim let out a saddened sigh and nodded before he looked Sarek straight in the eye and spoke.

" You're right, Spock did abandon me when I needed him most, Hell, so did my best friend and the members of my crew who I thought would have my back." Jim said quietly as he felt the dull, distant sting of that particular hurt in his heart. But Jim quickly forced the memories and the pain of what had happened in the past from his mind as he continued.

" But there is a key difference that sets Spock and my crew apart from everyone else." He said.

" What may that be James?" Sarek asked.

" It's been years since I've heard from or seen my brother Sam, and my mother's made it quite clear that she's washed her hands of me, especially when she found out that I joined Starfleet. And as for the numerous step-fathers, well, that's a lost cause entirely." Jim explained before he continued.

" What I want you to know sir, is that it was different with Spock and my crew in that, they may have abandoned me, but they came back. They accepted that they had all been wrong, but they didn't just give up because things got massively screwed up, they all worked hard to regain the trust I had lost in them, especially you son." Jim said with a smile that was somehow both sad and happy at the same time.

Sarek was silent for several long moment, just gazing at Jim with a quiet intensity that was so very much like Spock. Jim did his best not to squirm under the Vulcan gaze as he met it head on. Then Sarek parted his lips and spoke.

" You are indeed a very extraordinary being James T. Kirk. I am honored, now more than I was prior that you are a guest in my house, and even more so that you are the companion of my son." The Vulcan said, silently meaning every word.

It was Jim's turn to be silent, although astonishment was his reason for being so. But when he did manage to get his vocal cords to work properly, he used them.

" Th-Thank you for saying that sir, you honor me greatly." Jim said with a shaky smile.

" And you're pretty extraordinary yourself Sarek of New Vulcan." He added.

If Jim wanted to indulge in a fantasy, he might have just seen the corner of Sarek's thinly held lips curl upward minutely for a few fleeting moments before his lips were once again a straight line. But seeing as to how Jim had the faint blur of accumulated tears in his eyes, he'd just say that he was seeing things.

" I thank thee for thy kind words." Sarek said with a small bow of his head before he turned his gaze to Amanda's portrait and spoke without looking at Jim.

" And I can make the accurate assumption that she who was my wife would have been honored by your presence as well."

That nearly did Jim in. The blond quickly turned his rapidly filling eyes to Amanda's portrait as well. When he managed to keep the tears at bay and get his lower-lip to stop trembling, Jim spoke.

" Like wise sir, like wise." Jim said shakily.

Thankfully for him, Sarek and he descended into a warm, comfortable silence. Each lost in thoughts of what had transpired between them, what the future held, and the woman who's portrait they were sitting before in homage to.

What neither Sarek or Jim noticed what the tall and slender figure standing beside the doorway, silently watching over them both. From where he stood hidden, Spock turned away from the sight of his father and his lover sitting side by side on the floor, gazing at the picture of his late mother. Spock had arrived in time to hear some of Jim and Sarek's conversation. What Jim had said filled Spock with both renewed guilt, and deeper love. Spock had lost the privilege of being this extraordinary man's lover once, he would never, ever do so again. To see his father so accepting of Jim, and to see them both sitting side by side having a deep and cathartic conversation with each other had been wondrous to behold.

Feeling a myriad of emotion to profound to even begin to categorize, Spock smoothly turned away from the door to his father's meditation room and began heading back down the hallway towards the main living room area.

Spock had it in mind to head out to the veranda where they had all enjoyed lunch together and leave two of the most important people in his life to further conversation.

And if Spock reached up to wipe a minute amount of moisture from the corner of his eye as he walked, well no one was around to see him do so.