ThisA/N: My brother dropped a ladder on my foot today so I am in pain! I also haven't been sleeping properly recently so excuse any abominable mishaps.

You, with your words like knives
And swords and weapons that you use against me

You, with your switching sides
And your wildfire lies and your humiliation
You have pointed out my flaws again
As if I don't already see them
I walk with my head down
Trying to block you out 'cause I'll never impress you
I just wanna feel okay again

Little Tony, barely into adolescence, stood in front of his high school breathing deeply. He was quite literally gulping in big mouthfuls of fresh, crisp air. His nerves were all over the place and he could practically see his bravery slinking away, belly to the floor like a frightened cat. Taking one last breath he stepped forwards and instantly froze. Aggravatingly, his feet felt like they had been super glued to the floor.
"Pull yourself together boy!" he snarled through gritted teeth.
As if scared into compliance his jelly like legs began to shakily move. Left. Right. Left. Right. He thought loudly inside his screaming head. Keep going.

I bet you got pushed around
Somebody made you cold
But the cycle ends right now
'Cause you can't lead me down that road

There was a reason 12 year old Anthony DiNozzo did not want to enter his high school, for him it was a terrible chamber of torment. He was constantly teased for his floppy mass of sandy-brown hair, his uncomfortable thick rimmed glasses that helped him to see more than 8 feet in front of him, his oversized gangly frame that he was always tripping over, or the unfortunate bumbling, stuttering way he occasionally found himself talking in.

You have knocked me off my feet again
Got me feeling like I'm nothing
You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard
Calling me out when I'm wounded
You picking on the weaker man

"Hey DiNozzo!" A taunting voice called from behind him.
His eyes widened fiercely, their lids shooting up, his pupils flaring like a dying star collapsing in on itself.

"Hey DiNozzo! I'm talking to you" the scraping noise of a grating voice hollered again.
Flinching at every small noise he cautiously turned around and looked the approaching boy in the face.

"Have I ever told you how much I like your glasses?" With the last word barely past his lips, he snatched the spectacles from Tony's face, scratching his nose in the process.

"H ... hey" he cried and lurched clumsily forward.

"Wh ... wh ... what w ... was th ... th ...that?" He mocked, drastically over exaggerating Tony' stammer.

"Give m ... me my glass ... es" he tried to harden his his voice threateningly.

"N ... N ... NO!"

Defeated, yet still defiant he turned back and began to walk away. He could see a couple of metres a head of him so he decided he could walk away reasonably easily. However his legs were taken out by a well aimed kick to the back of his leg and he tumbled, sprawling onto the hard lino floor. Mustering all his mental strength he bravely got to his feet once more and kept walking away. Never in his life had he been more courageous ... the feeling of achievement inspired him to do many more things like it; there were so many more times to come.

Someday I'll be living in a big old city
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Someday I'll be big enough so you can't hit me
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Why you gotta be so mean?

APPROXIMATELY 30 YEARS AFTER

Tony smiled as he looked over at the women sat opposite him. Abby was chattering on about something she had recently come to adore, and Ziva ... Ziva. She was just sitting there, half listening to her easily excitable friend, half skimming through case notes. Absent mindedly she was twirling her curly brown hair around one of her fingers. Tony himself was completely unaware of the face he was pulling, to any passer by who merely glanced briefly in his direction could instantly see the barely masked emotion swelling out of every pore, spilling out of his very being. The strength of character. The admiration and respect his cooling gaze held. And most of all the love.

Over his teenage years and his twenties he had filled more. What had once been skinny strips of flabby flesh morphed into hardened slabs of tense muscle. His hair was still floppy and had that Beetles look to it but it was in no way even remotely blond anymore, he was also still bespectacled but his eye sight had steadily improved until the glasses were no longer necessary. He had grown in height too, he had always been a tall boy but he had reached a towering 6 foot 2 inches aged 16.

Someday I'll be living in a big old city
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Someday I'll be big enough so you can't hit me
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Why you gotta be so mean?

All you are is mean
And a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life
And mean, and mean, and mean, and mean