Disclaimer - I do not own Homeland. That pleasure belongs to Showtime. No copyright infringement or money making scheme intended. This is purely for reading enjoyment.

lipamo - thank you for the reviews, fav and follow. Much appreciated. I miss the greatness of S1 as well.

A/N Missing scene. End of Episode 4, "Semper I". This takes place after Carrie and Brody in the rain. Beginning next morning.

Jess leans on the door frame watching him cook breakfast. He seems more relaxed and less anxious. She didn't really want to interrupt in case she was dreaming.

"You going to come in or just stand there admiring the view?", Brody asks.

He waits for her to come into the kitchen, clearly taken by surprise at his playful manner or perhaps by the fact he knew she was there. He'd sensed her eyes on him. Maybe he over did the playfulness, but she's going to have questions about the support group. Questions he woud have no truthful answers to.

"Thank you."

"For what?", Jess asks confused.

"For asking me to get help."

Brody went back to making breakfast without elaborating further.

Jess studies him further. Now he was whistling.

"So. How did the support group go?", she asks unable to wait any longer.

There it was. Brody smiles before turning around.

Passing Jess a plate with scrambed eggs on it Brody answers, "alright. I didn't really have to say much. They go easy on you first meeting. But just seeing others there helped."

Jess wanted to pinch herself. The difference in his demeanor from the past few days was surreal.

"So you'll go back?"

"Morning", Chris mumbles coming into the kitchen.

The interruption of replying provides Brody the chance to compose himself.

Looking at Jess he answers, "yes. I'l go back."

"Go back where?", Chris asks looking between the two of them.

"Support group."

"Oh", Chris replies, head down, refusing to meet his father's eyes, as Jess smiles.

"Hurry up with breakfast so I can get you to School!", Jess says to Chris.

"See you later", she says giving Brody a kiss on the cheek.

Brody smiles, nodding his head.

"Daannaa. Hurry up!", he hears Jess shout as she leaves the kitchen.

Brody enjoys the soothing effect of the hot water from the shower cascading down over him, heating and relaxing simultaneously. He'd had a horrible couple of days or perhaps he'd been horrible for a couple of days would be more accurate. He'd been like a caged animal, out of control.

He'd been given a kick the night before. It had focused his ever wandering mind, slapped down the petty vindictive thoughts that had been swimming around in his head and temporarily killed the nervousness and anxiety that were plaguing him. Oh yeah, Carrie Mathison had given in a wake up call. She wasn't buying his answers at Langley anymore than he was buying her being at that support group was an accident.

She was dangerous and yet he felt something stir within him that just wasn't there with Jess, someone who knew.

"Brody, you awake? Brody?", Jess asks with hope.

He ignores her, keeps his eyes shut as tight as possible and eventually hears her lie down. He just couldn't stomach another attempt, his skin crawled at the thought. He was sleeping on the floor again. Partly so he wouldn't hurt Jess and because he just wasn't comfortable. He knew it hurt her but there was nothing he could do about it. He felt nothing for her in that sense anymore and he saw her flinch whenever she caught sight of one of his scars. He wasn't the man she wanted home. This brought its own frustrations as it is not how it should be. But then nothing was as it should be.

He was fed up being poster boy for all he PR bollocks and fed up with all the fucking dancing around Jess and Mike. It aggrevated him and made him want to lash out. Everybody knew and no one fucking told him. Well, to be fair to Dana, she had tried. He'd already realised by then anyway, but at least she'd tried.

He had no conrol over most of what was going on and he didn't like it. But it seemed the more he tried to control his life, the more he fucked up. He wanted something to hold onto, something to make him feel something other than frustration and anger and Carrie Mathison had done just that.

On the one hand, it was a bad idea to even think about trying to see her and on the other, he could use it to find out what she knows.

He felt the pull though, like a moth to a flame. All he had to do was find a way to see her again.