Disclaimer - I do not own Homeland. That pleasure belongs to Showtime. No copyright infringement or money making scheme intended. This is purely for reading enjoyment.

Terzima & LilMisfit - thank you.

Luckyu - thank you and you're welcome.

Lipamo - Lol. Yes, Frank knows his daughter.

A/N Missing scene from Blind spot. Brody's state at various points in the episode centered around the razor blade. My take.

Even the coldest of men with the coldest of gazes have family, maybe children to go home to. As he somehow became fluent in Arabic without really trying, he would hear Hamid speak occasionally to someone, about his family. He often wondered how he could do what he did every day and then go home and be a husband and be a father. Now he knew he was going to find out. This was it really starting.

His own cold, steely gaze reflecting back at him, Brody put the razor blade in his top pocket. He knew what he had to do.

Knowing and doing are different matters entirely. Easy to think you can do something, not so easy to do it. Brody just wanted to get home now. He kept checking for signs anything was wrong, paranoia and guilt eating away at him.

Mike is a good punchbag these days for him to take his frustrations out on, but as he paces in the bathroom he concedes the punchbag may just have won this round.

He stands in front of the mirror again, looking for an answer he knew he wouldn't find. Even mirrors didn't tell the whole truth. There's always a blind spot.

He sighs and with his own weary and exhausted gaze reflecting back at him, Brody pulls the razor blade out of his top pocket and puts it in the bin.

"For 8 years we used to pray for you to be alive. Now, we pray that you'll be ok."

He lets his son's words swim in his mind. His family, his wife and children. They care and yet he can't escape the looks and the discomfort. He isn't a good father and he isn't a good husband. He isn't even a good soldier.

The cold logic that had been so in control this morning, deserted him at the crucial point. He should be glad of that, but he's not sure he is.