It's been four days since she fought the ghoul. I should have died that day.
She can't stop thinking about what happened. I need to get it out of my head.
Thoughts of him constantly cloud her mind. I hope he's alright. I hope he's alive.
Everything she does reminds her of him: when she opens the refrigerator, the blast of air reminds her of the snow that night, of how he'd lain in the cold as she'd turned her back. When she goes outside, the white picket fence reminds her of their fight there, of the sound of his head crashing into the hard ground. When she mends rips in her clothing, the needle and thread remind her of the wound she'd given him, of how badly she'd stitched it together.
"Hey," Shiki says, waving his hand in front of her face, "Earth to Yuki."
"Sorry!" she jumps, dropping the needle onto the ground. "My bad, I was spacing out."
He eyes her suspiciously. "You've been acting weird lately, sis. If there's anything you need to talk about, you can always tell me, you know." He grabs a piece of toast as he gets up from the kitchen table, slinging his coat off its hanger and over his shoulder. "I mean, I've got to go to work now, but I'll be around later." He ruffles her hair affectionately with his free hand before grabbing his quinque's case and heading for the door.
"Yeah," Yukime mumbles absentmindedly, before the sight of the quinque's case clicks in her mind. "Wait, Shiki, I need a new quinque!"
He turns back to her, eyebrow raised to ask the question that his mouth, full of toast, can't.
"This one's too heavy for me," she explains quickly. "I was training with it the other day and it's just so hard for me to use. I can't swing it properly, so if I ever got into a real fight, I'd definitely be screwed." She lies automatically, not wanting Shiki to know she was attacked. He would definitely go and hunt that ghoul down. And then it'd be game over for all of us. "I mean, probably," she adds hastily, realizing how suspicious she sounds.
"Mm," Shiki mumbles around his toast before swallowing. "I've got a few spares if you want to try them out, although you know I usually use koukaku."
"A rinkaku would be best." As advantageous as a koukaku would be against the ghoul's ukaku kagune, Yukime knows she isn't strong enough to wield one, especially if she couldn't even use her old rinkaku. "You know I'm no good with the other types." Rinkaku is my best shot, since I can't use koukaku, and ukakus usually beat bikakus.
"Yeah, I've only got one other rinkaku. It's a bit lighter than the one you've been using, so it's no good for me. You can have it if you want. It's in the shed somewhere, so just grab it sometime. I'll see you after work, Yuki."
Tatara comes knocking on his door before Ayato's even woken up. "Kirishima," he calls, opening the door without waiting for a reply. It's more of a demand than a greeting.
Ayato sighs and rolls out of bed. "Tatara," he says, bowing as Tatara invites himself into his room, although any attempted respect is negated by the appalling state of his hair.
"I need you to go to the ninth ward." That's Tatara for you: no time wasted, just the quick, simple instructions which can only come from someone who's used to getting precisely what he wants. "You'll be negotiating with the leaders there. Noro's needed for something else, so you'll be going on your own this time. Do it quickly and come back."
Ayato sighs again. The last few days have been like this; in wake of their fight against the doves, they have to ensure the loyalty of all their affiliated groups, many of whom they hadn't bothered to inform of the attack before they'd simply gone and performed it. The ninth ward leaders would be particularly offended, seeing as it was their ward the attack had taken place in. This wasn't going to be pleasant.
Trudging out of his room, Ayato finds himself face to face with another unpleasant surprise – Naki. I so do not want to deal with you right now, dumbass Naki. The blonde haired boy sneers at Ayato, equally displeased. "Hey, asshole, you should have been awake three hours ago like me to help unload the supplies."
"My bad," Ayato scoffs back, "but I was out all yesterday cleaning up the fucking mess Yamori made in the sixth ward while you went and did the shopping, dumbass."
"Hey, the shopping is important, you know!"
"Yeah, yeah," Ayato continues sarcastically. "Maybe I'll worry about it after I've ensured we don't get torn apart by our allies. Now get out of my way. I've got a mission from Tatara and you're not invited." As the blonde struggles to find a reply, Ayato stalks off, leaving him fuming.
"Whatever!" Naki calls after Ayato. "I've got errands to do too!"
Idiot, Ayato thinks as he walks away. This world is full of fucking idiots. And the biggest one of all is that dumbass girl who let me off alive.
Although he's been busy the last four days, Ayato sure as hell hasn't forgotten about the human girl who spared his life. On the contrary, he's been consumed by his need to dispose of her. I'll get back at her someday. I have to. She had a quinque. She was a dove. She has to die.
And lucky – or not – for Ayato, here was his chance: the ninth ward, his destination, and the location of the girl's home. I hope you're ready, little girl. I'm coming to get you. I won't be merciful like you, like Aneki. I'm not like you. But even as the thought strikes his mind, Ayato isn't sure which you he means: the girl, or his sister.
The spare quinques are shoved all the way in the back of the shed amidst the colonies of dust bunnies and cobwebs which reside there. Yukime sighs resignedly, distinctly remembering having put them there in a fit of anger at the world and all its cruelties. If only I could go back in time and tell myself to leave them in the yard or somewhere random instead. Maybe then I'd be able to beat that ghoul just by chucking quinque cases at him. The thought of such an absurd fight makes her giggle – although it's no more absurd of a scenario than the ghoul's tripping over her fence and knocking himself out like that, which had proven unexpectedly realistic.
Thinking about the ghoul again sobers her up real fast. Focus, Yuki, you need to get that quinque so that you really can beat him next time. Chastened – by herself – Yukime sets about pulling the quinque cases out from their isolation one by one and checking each to see if it's the rinkaku Shiki promised her: bright orange koukaku – nope, forest green bikaku – nope, crimson red koukaku – nope, sky blue koukaku – nope, royal purple bikaku – nope. Finally, the last case sits before her – thank goodness Shiki hasn't collected that many yet. Although, of course, it's just my luck that the one I need is all the way in the back. He's probably never even used it, sheesh.
Yukime grabs the case's handle and drags it into the kitchen, feeling much more defeated than triumphant. Leaving it lying on the ground, she lets her body collapse into a chair, exhausted. I seriously need to work out more. It's no wonder I did so badly in that fight. I'm lucky I even lasted as long as I did. I can't believe it took my nearly dying to realize how weak I am.
Warily eyeing the case on the ground, she briefly wonders what color the quinque is. Screw it, let's just get this over with, she finally thinks, abruptly reaching down to open it.
The quinque blooms open in a flurry of light greens and yellows. For a moment, Yukime jumps, thinking that it really is some living, growing thing. The way it's colored, it looks just like some new little plant sprouting from the earth.
It looks like new life.
It looks like happiness.
It looks like hope.
And in the barren winter both outside and in her heart, it shouldn't be allowed to survive. But it does. She'd gotten so used to closing herself off from the world and putting on a strong front, but all it'd taken was one ghoul to come along and tear all those defenses down and show her how soft and scared and weak she truly was. Oh, no, no, no, no, I didn't want this.
And then –
Beep. Beep. Beep.
It's either the first or the last thing she wants, but she can't decide which. It's the tracker, telling her that the ghoul is nearby.
The ghouls of the ninth ward are definitely not happy with Aogiri. "We want out," their leader states flatly. "We're done with all of this. You didn't even tell us you were attacking the doves! You just left us with a pile of dead bodies in the middle of our ward, and now the doves are everywhere!"
Ayato sighs for the umpteenth time today. They've been going back and forth like this for quite a while now – it's almost five in the afternoon – and he just wants to finish things up. After all, he's got his own plans for today. "Don't exaggerate things," he snarls, trying, and failing, to be patient. At least he isn't swearing yet. "The doves are only in the back alleyways near where the attack was. No one even lives there." No one except for a certain girl, that is. But even she'll be dead soon. "You should be glad we killed all the doves here. Once the new ones fail to find anything, they'll be forced to leave you alone eventually."
"But you didn't even warn us!"
"Then I'm warning you now, dumbass!" Well, so much for not swearing. "We're planning more attacks soon, in other wards. Once we start those, all the doves here will leave pretty damn fast. Got it," he hisses. It's not a question; it's a threat.
Their leader takes one moment too many to deliberate his answer.
"I said, got it." Ayato takes a step forward and kicks the man in the stomach, sending him sprawling. His followers immediately form a circle around Ayato, although none of them dare to attack first. "Save your time. You can't beat me, weaklings."
Their leader – Ayato hasn't even bothered to remember his name – picks himself up slowly from the ground, his hands raised.
"You can't just leave Aogiri, got it," Ayato tests him.
"Yes, sir," the older ghoul replies meekly.
"Much better," Ayato smirks. "You probably just thought I was some accomplice of Noro all this time, huh. Well I'll tell you what, I'm not. I'm way fucking stronger than that."
The other ghouls nod, still giving him a wide berth. So weak, Ayato thinks. I didn't even use my kagune and they'll all like this. How pathetic of them.
"Well then, now that we've come to an agreement, I'll be off." Still smirking, Ayato lets himself out the door, the other ghouls bumping into each other to make way for him.
Outside, it's dusky, dark enough that he almost misses the girl huddled up on the ground against the side of a nearby building. It's the light of her phone, reflecting on her face, which gives her away. With her hood pulled up, he almost mistakes her for his sister for a moment – but no, it's better than that. It's the dove. Oh, this has been all too easy. Smiling again, Ayato steals away into the night, keeping an eye on the girl but hiding himself. Let's redo what happened last time.
Yukime wakes up with a start. I can't believe I actually fell asleep. She'd been sitting there, outside some random, abandoned building on the other side of the ninth ward where the tracker had directed her, for some time, and once the initial adrenaline rush from having the ghoul so close by wore off, she'd gotten pretty bored. All I've done today is wait, and wait, and wait. I never thought something could go from so exciting to so dull this quickly.
Checking her phone again – she's connected it to the tracker – she's alarmed to see that the ghoul's location has changed. For the longest time, he'd remained inside the building but now, he's suddenly a block down in the opposite direction. Shoot, he must have passed by me while I was sleeping. Hopefully I didn't drool or anything – I mean, hopefully he didn't recognize me. Chiding herself for such silly thoughts, Yukime gets up, pulling her jacket closer to her body. If she'd known she was going to be out so late, she would have brought a thicker jacket. I'll just count that as another charge against the ghoul once I see him: getting blood all over my backyard, destroying my fence, nearly killing me, and oh hey, making me bored and half frozen to death. What a professional list.
Eyes glued to her phone, Yukime walks down the block, slowly getting closer and closer to where the ghoul is. Still, she makes sure to stay hidden in the shadows – although that isn't very hard now that the sun's set. When she's about fifty feet away, she stops, looking about furtively. Apart from the few patches of ground lit up by streetlamps, she can't see a thing. It's just too dark. She presses herself against the wall of the adjacent building, inching closer and closer to the place where her quarry supposedly waits. I feel like an actor in a spy movie.
Twenty feet away, there still isn't anyone in sight. It's just a cold, dark night, silent save for the restless winds. It reminds her of her first fight against the ghoul. Oh please, please, don't let this just be a repeat of that.
Five feet away, and she still doesn't see anyone. She pauses, hesitant, the flood of light from the next streetlamp open before her. Surely if someone's that close to me, they'd have seen me by – oh shoot! His location on the tracker hasn't changed this whole time. It's not normal to stand so still! Even as she realizes it, she's aware of a shadowy figuring emerging from behind a tree on the other side of the lamp. It has to be him.
Ayato steps out from behind the tree, hearing the click of his boots on the pavement with satisfaction. The girl had taken forever to walk down the block, constantly ducking into shadows, which had – hilariously, in his opinion – made the light of her phone all the more obvious. Silly, silly girl, you really don't know how to survive on the street. "Hello there," he smirks. After sighing all day, the smirk sits much more naturally on his face. He's glad to have it back.
The girl halts even as he says the words, still in the shadows on the other side of the lamp. Finally, though, the light from her phone goes dark; she slips it into her pocket, simultaneously reaching for the clasp on the metal case she carries in her other hand. Even in the darkness, Ayato picks up on the action. You're being much too obvious, little girl. Still, he takes care to keep himself concealed in the shadows too. There's no way he's risking a repeat of what happened last time.
"You're that ghoul," the girl says. She sounds somewhat breathless. "You're alive."
I can't believe you're so dumb as to actually say that. No shit, I'm alive. But you're not going to be, not if you keep this act up. "Yeah," he replies coolly. "You didn't kill me."
"Of course I didn't!" Surprisingly, she sounds defensive. "I'm not an investigator, you know."
Momentarily surprised, Ayato's glad for the shadows; they hide his emotions. "Don't lie. You've got a quinque, so of course you're a fucking dove – sorry, I mean, investigator." I can't believe I just apologized to her.
"It's my brother's. He's the investigator, not me. I never wanted to kill anyone, honestly."
Ayato snorts derisively. "Yeah, right, and I'm a fucking human."
"Hey, I didn't kill you."
I suppose that's true. "That just means you're weak. It doesn't prove anything."
"No, I really just didn't want to kill you." She sounds like she's pleading, and it disgusts Ayato. "Please, believe me. No one else does."
"And I don't have to either. And besides, I don't care what your ideals on killing are, because I sure as hell know mine. And in my book, you've got to die."
"But I don't even know your name," the girl pleads. A brief silence ensues. "Yukime," she continues hesitantly after Ayato refuses to reply. "I'm Yukime Asashima. It just- I'm so sorry, it just feels so wrong to fight someone without even knowing their name."
To his surprise, Ayato finds his own lips moving. "Ayato," you idiot, what are you doing, stop it, you fucking dumbass, "Kirishima." Even in the dark, he thinks she smiles.
"That's a pretty name, Kirishima. I like it. Thank you for telling me."
Don't thank me. I'm here to kill you, damn it, so stop being so kind to me! It's the kindness that makes him explode. "Shut up, you fucking dumbass! You're just like my idiot sister, and I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Stop it!" He steps forward, kagune ready to erupt out of his back.
Yukime stares in shock as he suddenly steps into the lamplight, his cloak unfurling behind him. It's a familiar cloak, too familiar. No, no, no. She feels her heart drop, a sense of doom and foreboding hitting her almost physically. He couldn't possibly be from Aogiri, no, no. Why is this happening?
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