Summary: Weiss is sick and needs Ruby to administer a suppository.
Cure for the Common Cold
RWBY
Written from the perspective of Weiss Schnee
"Look, Ruby. It's simple.," I said through the sniffles. "You gotta take this… and… and…"
"And…?"
"Shove it up my… you know… my… achoo!"
I was laying in bed, hair down and in my gown. A dastardly common cold had struck me down with terrible vengeance. If I am to become the greatest huntress ever produced and bring honor to my family, I must excel in all my classes… but first I must attend them.
And defeat this stupid cold!
"Shove it… up where…?"
"Ruby. Do you know what a suppository is?"
"Nope!" She said cheerfully with a smile. As cute and adorable as my team captain is, she lacks basic knowledge. Alas, the curse of the plebeians.
"It's medicine."
"I'm following so far."
"And to administer it to someone… you need to push it…"
"Down their throats?"
"More like up their…"
Ruby tilted her head cutely.
"Is this something I should get Yang and Blake for…?"
My face paled more than ever. "No! Absolutely not!"
Ruby sighed.
"So what do I do Weiss?"
I explained. I explained slowly. I saw Ruby's smile slowly flatline before her mouth began to open in horror.
"-and then you go wash your hands afterwards."
Ruby looked at me in horror.
"O-Okay then… l-let's do this…"
I sighed. Assuming the position, I handed Ruby the medicine. It was just a suppository. No big deal. "Make it quick. Don't think about it."
Ruby nodded. She closed her eyes. I buried my face in my pillow. I'm sure it was as red as her cloak.
"I'm… putting it in now."
Something went in…
"Ruby."
"Y-yeah, Weiss?"
"Wrong hol-nevermind."
Cure for the Common Cold Fin