Chapter 3… The funeral

Thursday came too quickly. We all woke up extremely early and dressed in our church clothes. They were the only items of clothing we had that would be appropriate for something like this. Darry made us bacon and eggs. We sat in silence as we ate. None of us knew what to say. I don't think we needed to say anything. We were all feeling the same intense pain. Darry stayed strong and took charge, getting our clothes out and making sure we were all on time. At around seven we all piled into Darry's truck and headed to the church. My mother had taken me to this church ever Sunday for as long as I could remember. She said faith was the most precious aspect of life. And that you could not make it through anything without it. I hoped it would get me through today.

I was shocked by how many people had come to the church. I knew my parents liked to be involved in the community, but there must have been over a hundred people there. I walked between Darry and Pony as we made our way up to the altar. There, we stood before the open caskets that held our beloved parents. I hesitated as the boys began to move closer to them. Darry grabbed my hand and brought me up with him. I looked into my father's casket first. He was so pale and I noted the small cut above his left eye. He looked nothing like the father I knew and loved. My father was strong and stood tall. My father had an everlasting smile on his face. My father was indestructible. This man in the casket looked fragile and had a stone look to his face. The man was lifeless and completely… broken. I began to sob and Darry pulled me closer to him. I looked over to see Pony and Soda silently crying aswell. Darry on the other hand, was the pillar of strength. Holding his weaker siblings together. I then moved over to mom. I felt physically ill when I saw her. Her beautiful face, so similar to my own, was fraught with cuts and bruises. It was almost unrecognizable. I looked away immediately. A few moments later, the mass began. We sat in the front row with the gang seated behind us. I was glad I sat beside Soda. He always had the uncanny ability to console me. The boys were pole bearers and the carried the caskets out of the church along with the Shepard boys. I followed behind them, silently weeping for my fallen parents. I needed them so much.

We once again got into Darry's truck and drove to the cemetery. We stood around the grave. Some people from the church had followed us there. I was shocked when I spotted Jesse standing beside Curly Shepard. We just met a few days ago and here he was attending my parents funeral. It meant a lot to me. The priest said the last prayer and they lowered the caskets into the ground.

" I love you." That was my last parting to my mom and dad. Soda must have heard me because he pulled me a little closer.

After the service was over there were some people who wanted to offer their condolences to my brothers and I. Darry began talking to his High school football coach and the gang had formed a circle and were chatting away when Jesse came over to me.

" I'm so sorry for your loss Daisy." He said sincerely. " That was just awful. What happened to your parents and all."

" Thanks Jesse. And yea it sure was." I said.

" How are you holding up? The paper said you were there."

" I was, but I'm doing ok I guess. You know considering everything that happened."

" I was real worried about you." He said. I was surprised.

" Why? You barely know me." I hadn't meant to be rude. But it sure came out that way.

" Well you were such a nice girl. And we talked a lot the other day. I'm sorry if I'm overstepping my boundaries by coming. I probably shouldn't…"

" No, Jesse I didn't mean it like that. I'm really glad you came. It means a lot to me." I felt bad for making him think I didn't want him there. I really did.

" Oh, ok good." He smiled at me. " I'm here. You know if you need anything."

" Thanks Jesse. Your a really great guy." I smiled back at him.

" Your pretty great yourself, Daisy." I felt butterflies flutter in my stomach. Was he flirting with me?

" Daisy, Darry said to come get you. We're goin' home now." Pony said, coming over to us.

" I have to go Jesse."

" When will you be back in school?" he asked.

"Probably Monday."

" Ok, I'll see you there." He smiled as he walked away. Pony and I followed Darry and Soda into the truck and drove home.

The house felt extremely empty. Mom wasn't going around cleaning and dad's infectious laugh could not be heard. Even the gang was extremely quiet. There were no wrestling matches or poker games. They all just sat around the living room. I spotted Soda sitting at the kitchen table staring at a piece of paper that laid infront of him. I went and sat beside him. I looked down at the paper to find it was an application.

" Your getting a job Soda?" I asked.

" Yea. I saw a help wanted sign down at the DX station the other day and Darry's gonna need help with the bills and stuff."

" I think a part time job will help a lot." I agreed.

" No Daisy. I'm talking about a full time job." Soda sighed.

" What about school?"

" You know I ain't no good in school Dais. I ain't goin to college or nothing. I might as well make myself useful and work." I understood where he was coming from. Soda was never as smart as any of us kids when it came to school. I knew it made him feel real bad. But Soda had so many other special qualities. He just didn't always see them.

"Does Darry know?" I asked.

" Yea he thinks it's a good idea."

" Well you'll be working with cars all day. That's pretty tuff." I smiled t him. He sent me a Soda smile back.

" Oh yea." He ruffled my hair. " So, I saw Jesse at the cemetery. What'd he say to you?"

" He just wanted to make sure I was ok." I said shyly.

" That was real nice of him." Soda said thoughtfully.

" Yea, he's a real nice guy." I said. " He wanted to hang out. Right before the car stalled. I was talking about him with momma and daddy. Momma was real excited to meet him." I began to tear up. That could never happen now.

" Daisy, I know its's gonna be hard for you without mom here to talk to. But I'm here for you. I may not have all the answers. But I'll always listen." God I loved my brother.

" Thank you Soda. You have no idea how much that means to me. It's just crazy. How much has happened in a week. It hurts Soda. I still see it. Over and over again. I can't make it stop and it's driving me crazy. And now I'm trying to deal with being in highschool. And Jesse, I never liked a boy like that before. And I honestly have no clue what to do about it! It ain't fair Soda. She was supposed to be here." I began to cry and my big brother pulled me onto his lap and gently rocked me back and forth.

" I know baby girl, It ain't fair." He soothed me.

" Soda, I love you so much." I said once I calmed down.

" I love you too Princess." He said, ruffling my hair. " Let's go watch TV With the Boys."

The weekend went by fast. Before I knew it, Sunday was here. Pony and I were dreading going back to school. The house was like our refuge. Everyone was in the same mourning period as we were. They were all quiet. though, I truly did want things to go back to any degree of normalcy it possibly could. I knew life would never be completely "normal" again. Darry was doing his best to make sure the house was running good. I cooked almost every night since I was the only one who ever learned how to cook anything. Darry had went to speak with my dads old boss and was scheduled to start work on Monday. Soda was starting work at the DX on Monday aswell.

"Daisy you better make sure you get all the work you missed. I don't want you falling behind," Darry said as he sorted through a whole buck of papers on the kitchen table.

" I will Dar." I knew we didn't do a whole lot of work the first week of school.

" Hey yawl." Dallas drawled as he came through our front door and flopped done onto our couch.

" Hey Dal. What's goin on?" Pony greeted him.

" Not shit. This neighborhood os dead man."Dally grumbled.

" It's Sunday Dal." Soda said.

" Yea. Hey runt hows it goin?"" He asked me.

" It's goin Dal." I replied. He just smiled at me.

That night we all went to bed early. We had to adjust to our new schedules. I felt real bad for Darry and Soda. They were they shouldn't have been forced to quit school in order to support our family. Darry had worked so hard to get a scholarship so he could go to college. And now it was being stripped away from him. I knew Soda was happy working. He was happier then he ever was goin to school. But I still felt bad. They were putting all of themselves into making sure Pony and I had the opportunities to excel and hopefully give us a chance at getting out of this neighborhood. I would be forever grateful to them.