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Arthur frowned at his computer. Merlinsbeard hadn't been reblogging as many of his posts as usual. Normally by the end of the day, the other blogger would have reblogged at least a few things and added a comment or two. But the only thing that had come up on Arthur's dash from him was one post, and it was lacking in any witty or fanboyish commentary. He'd reblogged some other things, but none of them were Arthur's.

That was… a little odd.

Of course, there was no reason for him to only reblog Arthur's posts. It would be a bit ridiculous for Arthur to expect merlinsbeard to always want to talk to him. Still, Arthur felt a little bereft without anything new to discuss or joke about.

He went to merlinsbeard's ask box and wondered if he was acting like a brat, and then debated over what he should say, before grinning and typing a quick message:

Hey. It's been one month since I started following you! Happy anniversary!

A few minutes later, he got a private reply:

Do you seriously keep track of how long you've been following people?

He went back to merlinsbeard's ask:

Only the people I like.

Okay, so maybe he was acting like a schoolboy with a crush. But he decided he didn't care, especially when merlinsbeard responded with:

:) Are you saying you like me?

Arthur grinned. He wondered how he should respond. Flirting on the internet was different from flirting in real life, when you could ask someone out on a date or hold their hand. He definitely liked merlinsbeard, but if you were too forward on the internet, people tended to think you were a creepy internet stalker. He decided to go with:

What's not to like? ;)

Onceandfutureking reblogged 4 gifs of Rose, Martha, Donna, and Amy from Doctor Who and added the comment:

Rose was still the best companion, imho.

Merlinsbeard reblogged and added:

Come on, Rose was awesome, but Donna Noble was the best.

Onceandfutureking reblogged and added:

Donna was fantastic, but she didn't love the Doctor like Rose did. Donna wanted to see the universe and be someone great because she didn't want to go back to being a nobody, but Rose wanted to stay with the Doctor because she didn't want to leave him alone.

Merlinsbeard reblogged and added:

But Rose eventually got a happy ending, she got a Doctor that she could have a life with. Donna didn't really get what she wanted, she didn't get to see the universe. She didn't even remember the parts of the universe that she did see! She went back to being totally average after having done something great. Isn't that heartbreaking?

Onceandfutureking reblogged and added:

Maybe I don't like getting my heart broken.

Bigbadwitch reblogged and added:

Stop flirting. You two are both wrong. It's obvious Rory is the best.

Onceandfutureking posted:

I'm having a bad day. Can someone post a cat gif or something to make me feel better?

Merlinsbeard rebloggedand added:

*gif of cat hugging a stuffed toy* Hey, what's got you down?

Onceandfutureking reblogged and added:

It's nothing. Some days my father just makes me feel like I'm not good enough or something.

Merlinsbeard reblogged and added:

That's crazy talk. I may have never met you in real life, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that you are smart and funny and definitely good enough. You're one of the most amazing people I know. I mean really, if there's anyone who's not good enough, it should be me. I still don't know why you talk to me; I'm so far beneath your level of awesomeness.

Onceandfutureking rebloggedand added:

Now who's talking crazy talk?

It was a lazy weekend when Arthur checked his blog and came across an interesting conversation between merlinsbeard and will-is-me. He had come to realize that Will (probably his name, but on the internet you could never be sure) was one of the few people who knew merlinsbeard in real life. He probably should have ignored their conversation, since he wasn't involved and he wasn't even following Will. But, well, his crush had turned into something resembling obsession.

He tracked the convo back to its beginning and read it chronologically.

Will-is-me reblogged a post by merlinsbeard and added:

Come on, Merlin. You can't give me the silent treatment forever. Is this because I insulted your love life?

Merlinsbeard rebloggedand added:

It's more that you insulted my social life in general.

Will-is-me rebloggedand added:

Finally, he speaks. And you know I didn't mean anything by it. Half the people on the internet have a shit social life. That's why they're on the internet.

Merlinsbeard rebloggedand added:

Thanks for that.

Will-is-me reblogged and added:

You know what I mean. Stop bringing yourself down like that. You need to get a boyfriend. A real one. It can't be that hard, you're a good looking guy. If I wasn't straight, I might even call you cute.

Merlinsbeard reblogged and added:

Yes, that's why I've been single my entire life. My gangly, bookish charm is just so intimidating.

Arthur tapped his finger over the mouse. This was probably the most information about merlinsbeard's appearance and personal life that had ever come up. And the guy was obviously more than a little insecure. Arthur wanted to comment with something like, "No, stop putting yourself down, you're gorgeous." Except he didn't know, did he? He'd never seen him; he'd fallen for a personality, a quick wit, an intelligent mind, and an adorable imagination.

While he'd been thinking, another exchange had occurred.

Will-is-me reblogged merlinsbeard and added:

More like you've got your nose in a book all the time. How are you gonna meet someone when you never put yourself out there?

Merlinsbeard reblogged and added:

Maybe I don't put myself out there because I know I'll just be disappointed. Honestly, what sort of guy would want to put up with me?

Before he could second-guess himself, Arthur reblogged the post and added a gif of Katniss from the Hunger Games screaming "I volunteer as tribute!"

Merlin blushed when he saw that onceandfutureking had reblogged the conversation he'd been having with Will. He should have realized that other people would see it, but he had been so irritated with Will that he hadn't thought to move their discussion to somewhere more private. Now everyone would realize what an insecure twat he was.

He pulled his legs up and started spinning in his computer chair until he got dizzy. Should he respond? Or just let the comment go? There was no denying that he was talking to onceandfutureking pretty much every day, and that some of their conversations were undeniably flirty.

But on the other hand, internet flirting was something else entirely. It was pretty common for people to jokingly profess their love for friends on the internet, especially when they were never going to actually meet.

Except Merlin genuinely liked onceandfutureking, and he got the impression that he liked Merlin back. Oh, but he didn't even know the guy's actual name! They were never going to meet in real life!

He reblogged the post and finally started typing:

You're only saying that because you've never actually met me in person.

He bit his lip and waited for a response to come, refreshing his dashboard multiple times. Will didn't even respond; he must have seen onceandfutureking's comment. He tried to distract himself with youtube clips, but it didn't work very well because his need to check for a reply made him pause the video every 20 seconds.

At long last, onceandfutureking responded:

Maybe I've never met you in person, or seen your face, but I know you. I've talked to you. And you're lovely, ridiculously so. And if I could, I would tell you that to your face, because it wouldn't be any less true then.

Merlin bit his lip, his cheeks turning pink, because honestly? How the hell could he reply to that? But apparently, he wouldn't get the chance, because Will reblogged onceandfutureking first:

Yeah, what pratface said.

Onceandfutureking reblogged will-is-me and said:

Excuse me? Do I know you?

He watched as two of his best friends (on and off the internet) started up a petty argument that ended up all over his dashboard. He grinned to himself, feeling much better about himself than he had in a long while.

Arthur set up his camera to make another video for the internet. He didn't like youtube vlogging as much as tumblr, so most of his videos were for tumblr.

He checked his appearance in the mirror again. It wouldn't do for him to make a whole video, only to go over the footage for editing and discovering that his hair was sticking up in the back.

(He also kind of wanted to look good for merlinsbeard.)

Hair tidy, shirt straightened, he turned the camera on.

"Hello friends. Uh, just here to say hi to all my new followers on tumblr. Wow, 4,000 of you now. I don't know who you are, or why you're following me, but thanks. It's much appreciated. Feel free to message me, don't be shy. I swear I don't bite."

He always felt self-conscious doing this, not because people would be watching, but because currently no one was actually watching. It was weird talking to a camera and trying to be natural about it. What if Morgana walked in again?

"Now, I'm going to address a few things that have come up recently in messages and whatnot. First off: Yes, I am gay. It's not a gimmick or whatever. Stop questioning my sexuality. Second: I am single, but hopefully not for much longer." He winked. "You know who you are. Third, can we please stop with all the hate for Elementary? Yes, the fact that it came out so soon after BBC's Sherlock is a questionable decision, but does not really reflect on the content of the show itself. Stop whining. If you have a problem with the fact that I post things for both shows, unfollow me. I don't care."

He took a deep breath and ended with, "Finally, for all the people requesting that I do a Topless Tuesday, here is my answer." He smiled a cheerful, blinding smile. "No."

Merlin let his backpack drop as he sank down into his seat beside Gwen with a sigh.

"Busy weekend?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

He snorted. "Hardly. Not with our midterms coming up. And you know me, when I'm not studying, I'm glued to my computer."

"Yes, I've noticed that your activity on tumblr has… increased recently."

He groaned. "Not you too. Will's already giving me a lecture about strangers on the internet, and despite what everyone seems to think, I can take care of myself."

She smiled. "I wasn't going to say anything of the sort. I mean," she corrected herself. "Not that you shouldn't be careful, because there are weirdoes out there, definitely. But I don't think you're in any danger. Is all I'm saying. Um."

Merlin grinned, used to her slightly nervous way of always trying to say the right thing. "It's fine Gwen."

"I'd only meant that you've been talking to onceandfutureking rather a lot. You two seem to be becoming good friends."

He felt his cheeks redden slightly, though he willed them not to, glancing away to distract himself.

"More than friends?" she prodded, eyes wide and curious.

"No, of course not, Gwen. We don't even know each other's real names, there's no way we could ever be more. It's just. He likes to tease me and sometimes it seems like he's flirting with me and, you know, he's kind of gorgeous. But unless we have cyber sex or something—which, honestly, even the idea of that just weirds me out—he'll only ever be a friend. A good friend, who I like talking to a lot."

"What if you met up with him in person some day?"

"That's…" He shook his head. "I don't think so."

"Why not? I know for a fact that he genuinely isn't a creepy stalker. He's very nice, if a little arrogant at times."

"Wait, you—" Then Merlin realized several things at once. Gwen knew bigbadwitch and limegreenknight irl, both of whom knew onceandfutureking irl. Which meant… "You know him?!"

Gwen bit her lip and nodded.

"But you don't even follow each other!"

"That's… well. It's kind of awkward. You see, we kind of used to date. Before he knew he was gay," she rushed on to say as she saw his face. "So I think he kind of feels guilty, like he thinks I think I turned him gay or something. But I don't! We just don't talk to each other…" she trailed off.

"You. Used to date. Onceandfutureking?!" He was gaping, rather like a fish, but he couldn't help feeling like his world had turned completely upside down. His internet crush had always seemed like some distant, unreachable person, existing in some vague and unreal way. Now he discovered that, not only did Gwen know him, she used to date him.

"I'm so sorry, I should have told you a long time ago, shouldn't I?"

"No, no. It's fine, Gwen. I'm just. Surprised, is all."

She nodded. "But would you consider meeting him now? Face to face? I may not follow him, but I've seen how he interacts with you, and I think he'd like to meet you."

"I…" He swallowed. "Give me time to think about it."

A few days later, Merlin blinked as he opened tumblr in a new tab and saw that he had a message. He grinned to himself, clicked on the little message icon to see what it was and his face fell.

Omfg go die u faggot

His first thought was, "Why is it that anons never seem to be able to write properly?" The second was, "Oh my god, I got an anon hate message."

It wasn't a rare occurrence on tumblr and most internet sites, he knew that. But it was the first time he'd ever been the recipient of such hate and somehow… he didn't feel much. Maybe it was the fact that it was just one stupid message and they didn't even bring up any valid reasons for why he should go die, aside from the fact that he was gay. But the majority of tumblr was pro-homo. This message could be for anyone.

He stuck his tongue out a little and typed:

Wow, that's original. Did you come up with that yourself?

Then he posted it. The chances of the the anon seeing it or actually being one of his followers was slim, but he posted it anyway.

What he didn't expect was to receive another message almost immediately from onceandfutureking:

Ignore that homophobic loser, all anons are just cowards with no life of their own and too much time on their hands. If anything, it's merely a sign that you are on your way to tumblr fame. They're just jelly.

Merlin smiled. It warmed his heart to know that he'd gotten so defensive on Merlin's behalf. He posted the comment with the response:

The life of a tumblr celebrity is hard, isn't it? :P

Of course, Merlin wasn't an internet celebrity by any means; he still had only thirty-one followers, even after onceandfutureking had started following him and reblogging his posts.

Over the next hour, several other friends sent him messages to send support and hurl insults at the person who'd picked him to send anonymous hate to. He was grateful for the supportive group of friends he'd made, even if they'd never met (and probably never would meet) in real life. If he was being honest with himself, he really didn't care how many strangers might like his posts as long as his friends still liked them.

He took a break from tumblr to watch another episode of Teen Wolf. (He wasn't going to admit it, but the show was starting to grow on him.)

When he checked back in to tumblr later, his mouth dropped open. "Oh, shit."

The anon who'd sent Merlin a message earlier was now bothering onceandfutureking. He had another stupid message waiting for him too, but he hadn't been on to answer it until now. But apparently, onceandfutureking had been.

Anonymous asked:

u calling me a coward is funny cuz ur the loser on the intrnet who thinks hes so cool. But really u probly have no friends in rl huh

onceandfutureking replied:

Sorry to disappoint, but I am fabulous and popular both on the internet and off it. As an added bonus, I know how to spell and use proper punctuation.

Merlin deleted the message in his inbox without even really looking at it and then went to onceandfutureking's page to send him a message:

Oh god, I'm so sorry. I didn't think the anon would even come back to my page, let alone bother anyone else.

The reply was almost immediate, and this time private:

Don't worry about it, sweetheart. I can handle him. ;)

Immediately, Merlin blushed a stunning shade of crimson and was immensely glad to be in the privacy of his own bedroom. He stared at his screen for a few minutes. Sure, he was flirty sometimes, but onceandfutureking probably just said it to annoy the homophobic anon or something. Probably.

When Arthur saw that that bastard anon had sent merlinsbeard that message, Arthur had clenched his fists on reflex. He felt like punching his computer screen. He had seen posts like this before—hell, he'd received them, himself. It was a stupid message, obviously, but never before had he felt the urge to protect someone like he wanted to protect merlinsbeard. He may not know what his name was, or what he looked like, but he knew that he was sweet, funny, and intelligent, but he wasn't very confident and thought too little of himself. And he was fast becoming one of Arthur's best friends, despite the fact that they only spoke on the internet.

So Arthur immediately sent him a message, wishing he could say it in person. He didn't know how merlinsbeard actually reacted to the message, but wished he was able to meet him, to be able to wrap his arms around him and make sure he knows it isn't true. Arthur's own feelings and the lack of ability to do anything about them made him frustrated.

Then he received a message in his ask box.

He grinned. Suddenly, an outlet for his frustration had appeared.

The anon was stupid and didn't even bother to type properly. Arthur didn't even have to try to make a fool out of him. Every insult left in Arthur's ask was more idiotic than the last. He wondered if perhaps whoever the anon was had had a little too much to drink.

Merlinsbeard sent him a message to apologize about the anon, but Arthur honestly didn't mind in the least if it meant he wasn't bothering his friend anymore. He sent back a cheeky reply and then sat back to see what ridiculous insult the anon would come up with next.

It was late Sunday evening. Merlin yawned as he sat down to check his emails. He hadn't had a chance to get to his computer all day. After replying to a professor's email about an assignment, he went on tumblr.

Earlier in the day, onceandfutureking reblogged one of the typical "no one on the internet knows you're a cat" posts.

Merlin reblogged it and added an image of a dog at a computer.

No one is who they say they are on the internet.

When Arthur reblogged it again, he'd typed:

Hey, at least people know what I look like. For all I know, you could be a cat, pretending to be a dog. :P

Merlin stared at the text. He had always been paranoid about giving too much of himself away on the internet, and lately Will had only been encouraging that mentality. But he knew it was harder to get to know people (read: onceandfutureking) better if he didn't share anything about himself.

He still didn't like the idea of making his identity known, though. Despite what Gwen said, Merlin still wasn't sure if he wanted to actually meet onceandfutureking. It was no longer about knowing whether or not he was an internet stalker, but more about the fact that he wasn't sure if he would like Merlin. He said he liked Merlin for his personality, and that was well and good, but what if they met up and… the just didn't click as well face to face? What if they had nothing in common aside from fandom? He bit his lip and made a decision, opening up Paint.

Later that night (or very early the next morning, however you want to look at it), Arthur scrolled down his dashboard and saw a post by merlinsbeard. It was a horribly drawn stick figure done in Paint, with what looked like black hair and blue eyes. The description read:

Some of you may be wondering what I look like, but as I don't want too much of my personal life out on the internet for just anyone to see, I have attempted a self-portrait. It's fairly accurate, if I do say so myself.

Arthur couldn't help but chuckle. It wasn't what he wanted; he desperately wanted to know what merlinsbeard looked like, to be able to put a face to the username. But he knew he couldn't push for personal details without looking like a skeevy internet stalker himself (even though he kind of was at this point.) He'd be lying if he said he hadn't gone through every single one of merlinsbeard's posts—all 3,000 of them—looking for information about himself that he might have let slip.

All in all, he got that he was a college student, tall and skinny, more typical geek and not athletic like Arthur who enjoyed playing sports in his spare time, and from the Paint doodle, he apparently had black hair and blue eyes.

When he clicks on his dashboard again, Arthur notices merlinsbeard reblogged something from Gwen. She'd commented:

Are you still up Merlin? Please tell me you've finished that essay for Kilgarragh. He'll smoke you if you ask for more time.

Merlinsbeard had replied:

Yeah, yeah. It's done, I swear. I double-checked it and everything.

Arthur realized two things simultaneously: Gwen was the second person to refer to merlinsbeard as Merlin. He had thought Will was using it as a nickname so he didn't have to type out the full "merlinsbeard," but Will also knew him irl—could that be his real name? The second thought was that Gwen was talking as if they had the same professor, like they went to the same school. He knew that Gwen had gone away to a small university in Ealdor—did she know Merlin?

He was loathe to call up Gwen and ask—that would be even more awkward than following her on tumblr. But…

He opened up a new tab and went to facebook. He rarely went on unless he had notifications or had been invited to an event. But now it might actually come in handy. Despite not following her on tumblr, he had never unfriended her on facebook; Did anyone ever unfriend anyone?

He went to Gwen's photos and started going through them, checking the names of everyone tagged in the photos.

"Crap, I really have become a stalker," he muttered to himself. But as he glanced at the clock, he figured he could blame it on temporary late night insanity.

Arthur was skimming through pictures of Gwen's family or of things like a pretty sunset that she had decided to share. After about two dozen photos, Arthur knew he had found who he was looking for.

"Merlin Emrys," he read aloud. "Holy shit."

The photo wasn't the best—a little blurry, and taken with Gwen's cameraphone, by the look of it. But you could clearly see that the guy in the photo next to Gwen was bloody adorable. He was thin, taller than Gwen, with curling dark hair over a pair of slightly-too-large ears. He had bright blue eyes framed in dark lashes, a wide smile, and the most incredible cheekbones Arthur had ever seen.

Arthur leaned back and pressed the heels of both hands to his eyes. "I am so screwed."

Gwen yawned as she reached out, feeling around for her phone, which had started vibrating. She was tempted to just ignore it and go back to sleep, but she was a nice person. What if it was something important? What if someone needed her for something? If she didn't answer, she would just feel guilty and be unable to go back to sleep anyway.

She blinked blearily and looked at the caller ID before answering.

"Arthur?" she asked, confused and still sleepy. He hadn't called her in years.

"Sorry, did I wake you?"

"It's fine, what's going on? I haven't heard from you in a while," she said, muffling a second yawn.

She could hear the wince in his reply. "Um. Sorry about that. Distance makes it easier to avoid awkward situations."

"Is this not an awkward situation?"

"Um. Actually, this is a very awkward situation. I just have to ask. I know you follow merlinsbeard on tumblr, but do you know him? I mean actually know him?"

She sat up in bed. "What?"

"I sort of, um. Well, I saw something on tumblr…" he started talking really fast, "and it looked like you might actually go to school with him or something so I looked at your pictures on facebook and I saw a guy named Merlin Emrys and I was wondering if maybethatwasmerlinsbeard?"

She barely understood the last bit, but what she got from the conversation was, "Are you stalking him?"

"No!" he shouted indignantly. "Not on purpose, anyway. It kind of just happened."

She sighed. "Well, you already know now. Yes, that's him. What are you planning to do, now that you know this?"

"Does he know that I know you?"

"It's kind of just a recent thing, actually. I told him last week that we used to date, until… you know."

"And what did he say?"

"Mostly he was surprised. I suggested introducing you two, but he said he'd think about it. He's shy."

"Yes, I got that." There was a pause on the line, and Gwen could tell that Arthur was thinking, not waiting for a response. "If you could arrange a way for us to meet… I really like him, Gwen."

Her heart melted just a little. "I'll see what I can do. But I won't force him to do anything he doesn't want to."

"That's all I ask."

"Alright. Good bye, Arthur."

"Thanks, Gwen."