Sophie`s POV

I looked down at the knife in my hands. was I really going to do this again? The pain was just too much. But I scared Lok so much last time. I never meant for the cuts to be that bad. I just wanted to let out the pain. I put the knife on my wrist but I didn`t cut.

"I won`t do this." I said to myself. I put the knife down and sat on the floor. Thears trickled down my face. I wanted to pain to go away. I wanted everything to stop. I wanted the nightmares to end. I wanted us to be a happy family. I didn`t want Lok always being the one to take care of Nina. I pulled my knees to my chest and cried. I cried until I couldn`t anymore. I stood up from the floor and went to check on Nina. I picked her up and twisted a finger in her brown curls. I kissed her hean and calmed her down. I brought her to the sitting room. Lok wasn`t home yet. I looked at the bandages on my arm and thought aboout how scared he looked when he found me. How worried he was about me. The look on his face when he saw me bleeding on the floor.. My

I heared a car door shut and wiped my tears away. Lok stepped into the apartment and kissed my head.

"Hey Sophie." He said. He sat down next to me. "How are you?"

"I`m fine." I lied. Nina squirmed in my arms.

"Hey Nina." Lok said. Kissing her head. He took her from my arms and held her up. Making her giggle. Her little hands reached for him. He put her down on his knee ans started making faces at her. Finally. A normal moment. Maybe I could make it through this. A tear escaped and I wiped it away.

"Are you alright?" Lok asked me.

"I`m okay."

"Sophie. What`s wrong?"

"I need to tell you something."

"What is it?"

"I tried to cut myself again."

"Sophie. You were doing so good."

"I`m loosing it again. Every time I think it will be okay I just fall apart."

"You`re stronger than this. I know you are. You`ve been through so much since we met. Heck. You even jumped into a volcano. My point is that, no matter what life threw at you, You`ve been able to fight back, It should be no different now. And you`re not alone."

"It`s so hard." I said. "Slowly slipping away. Losing my grip on sanity."

"I know it`s hard. But you have to keep trying. Not for me. For you. For Nina. Do it for our daughter." Nina looked at me and smiled. I saw the begining of a tooth sticking out of her gums.

"You`re right. I`ll try my best. For both of you."

"Why don`t you start by telling me when you get these bad feelings. So I can help you."

"Alright."

"I love you Sophie."

"I love you too."