Disclaimer: Characters are the property of ABC & AWM
What If…?
Chapter 4: The Bloodier The Better
Castle really isn't sure if Kate means for him to move over on the couch to make space for her to settle in beside him, despite what she just said. So he tries to turn around and put his feet back on the floor. But Kate just bumps his ankles back up with her knee, before they even hit the deck, and then she planks herself down by his hip, forcing him to move back into the cushions to make room for her.
If he could feel her heart beating right now, he would know how terrified she is. But somehow or other, she manages to regulate the heat warming her whole body, in a performance of controlled nonchalance that Martha Rodgers would have given up a Tony for (had she ever actually won such an award).
"So? Hard Boiled or The Killer? What are we starting with?" she asks, lifting her glass off the table and attempting to lift it to her lips without her partner noticing how badly her hands are shaking.
Castle quickly glances at his watch. It's twenty to eleven at night, and Kate still seems eager to start a movie marathon. He considers pointing out the time, but catches himself with a nano second to spare, working out that mentioning the time sounds as if he isn't keen, which he most definitely is. And then there's the fact that it might chase her away, and she's sitting beside him now, hip-to-hip, reaching for their bowl of popcorn as if it's the most natural thing in the world to have her warm, soft body so close to his.
And more than anything, that's what he really wants - for them to be the most natural thing in the world.
He opens his mouth to speak, but before he can say anything, Kate warns, "And Castle, if you say 'ladies choice'…"
"Uh, okay. Then if you're holding a theoretical gun to my head… It is theoretical?" he jokes, delighted by her answering smile.
"This time it is. Go on," she says indulgently, nudging his side.
"Great. Well, in that case, my choice would be Hard Boiled," says Castle, peering at Kate from behind his hands, flinching as he awaits her response to his choice.
"Yes," hisses Kate in triumph, trying to focus on his movie selection, rather than the fresh scent of his skin and clothes, both just so familiarly 'Castle', wrapping around her with dangerous effect.
She high fives him, then leans to one side to let him point the remote to set up the movie, before he settles back down against the cushions, shimmying into the back corner and then stretching his arm along behind her to make space. Still making sure not to touch her at this point.
"You ready?" he asks, and he feels as if his lips could just brush her ear if he leans any closer, though in truth he's still a good foot away from doing that.
"As I'll ever be," replies Kate, cryptically, as he presses play.
The background to the story is that a kick-ass Hong-Kong cop teams up with an undercover agent after his partner is killed, to shut down a mobster and his crew who're running guns in Hong Kong. There are drugs, weapons aplenty, chase scenes, even a pistol with a silencer hidden inside a hardcover book, James Bond-style.
When they reach the motorcycle scene, where ten or so guys are riding bikes through an old warehouse, firing an assortment of weapons, from automatic handguns to massive machine guns, from the back of their bikes, Castle sits up and nudges Kate.
"Hey, ever fire your gun off the back of your bike or…or out of a moving vehicle?" he asks, sounding like an awe struck teenager.
"Seriously?" laughs Kate, sitting up beside him, since they both seem to have slipped down into a prone position. (And how did that happen?) "How long have we been working together?"
"Wow! Working together? That's progress. Normally, I get 'following you around'."
"How long?" repeats Kate, trying to suppress a grin and ignore his remark.
"Four years."
"And in that time, exactly how many car chases have we been in?"
"A couple, maybe more."
"Right. And did you ever hear me tell you to take the wheel so that I could lean out of the window and fire my weapon?"
Kate's trying hard not to laugh at the serious look on Castle's face as he answers each of her questions.
"No. But then I don't always listen to everything you tell me to do."
"Ah, so you're finally prepared to admit that," sighs Kate.
"Maybe if you let me drive once in a while…"
"Castle?" she says, laughing now.
"What?"
"Shut up and watch the movie."
"Right, boss."
"Boss? Oh, this moment I have to record for posterity."
"What? Why?"
"You just called me 'boss'."
"So?"
"You just admitted that you don't even listen to the instructions I give you out in the field, to keep you safe, I might add. And now you're calling me 'boss'?"
Castle grins at her, looking silly and childish, and then they both start laughing, the movie temporarily forgotten, as sparks fly off of oil drums and shipping containers in the old warehouse on his giant screen. Though these are mere damp squibs in comparison with the sparks that are starting to fly in Castle's living room between a certain mystery writer and his lady detective.
Kate lies back down, her head on the arm of the sofa, looking up at the ceiling once her laughter subsides, and then she sighs a beautiful, sated sigh, letting her hands come to rest on her stomach.
Castle is still leaning up on one elbow, looking down at her with a blissful smile on his face.
"I wish we'd done this before," he says, a little sadly, nudging her thigh with his knee.
"What? Movie night?" asks Kate, turning her head to look up at him.
He's such a warm, solid presence beside her, and now that their nerves have subsided a little, she's enjoying being so close to him. The level repetition of his breathing is soothing, the rise and fall of his chest a measure of time passing, and she would really like nothing more than to turn on her side and have him spoon her right now, strong arms wrapping around her body to hold her tightly against him.
But still something holds her back. That old boundary they stalk, like a tiger at an electric fence, scared away when they come too close to crossing this mysterious line they've set up between them by some unspoken mutual agreement somewhere back in their distant past.
Wine. 'Yes, more wine', thinks Kate, sitting up to reach for her glass.
"Movie night, drinks, whatever," Castle carries on musing. "Just…hanging out away from work."
Kate grabs her glass and takes a healthy sip.
"Yeah, and we'd never hear the end of it at the precinct," she says, testing out his reaction to that idea.
"Does that bother you?" asks Castle, testing her out too, and now he's doing her thing – biting his lip – as he waits for her reply.
"Being the source of precinct gossip?"
"Yeah."
"I…no. Actually, no. Because I'm pretty sure they think we're…doing something already anyway. And if we're not, then they think that we should be."
"And what do you think, detective?"
Everything goes still. The tension in that moment is unbelievable, electric, and they've never been this physically close before, unless cuffed and drugged or thrown in the trunk of a car, and even then, not for this long and by choice.
"I think maybe this wine is going to my head and I'm letting my mouth run the show instead of my brain," laughs Kate, recklessly taking another gulp of wine, regardless.
As she goes to put the glass down, her elbow bumps the cushion and she sloshes a few drops of ruby red liquid onto her white shirt.
"Shit!" she curses, struggling upright.
Castle springs into action.
"Okay, we need to keep that wet."
Kate arches an eyebrow at him.
"This another one of your ploys to get me naked?"
"As if," he snorts. But his pinking cheeks and the twinkle in his eye give him away.
Great suggestion, Kate.
He climbs over her and then offers her his hands to pull her upright.
Kate overbalances once she's on her feet, falling against him. But he catches her easily, resting his hands on her shoulders to steady her.
"You okay?"
"Fine. You pulled too hard. That's all."
"Sorry," he smirks, pausing the movie. "Don't know my own strength clearly."
"I'm not drunk, Castle," she says, poking him in the arm.
"Okay. I get it. You're not drunk. But we do need to soak your shirt or that wine will stain."
Kate swivels her eyes up from the blooming purple patch above her left breast to meet her partner's gaze.
"So, you do want me to take my clothes off?" she challenges, biting the inside of her cheek.
"I will get you one of Alexis' shirts from the laundry. Why don't you go change out of that in the bathroom, and I will pass something in to you? Like a gentleman, Kate," he calls out after her.
Kate turns round and gives him a sexy grin over her shoulder.
'Yeah, well don't be too much of a gentleman,' she mutters under her breath, once she's headed towards the bathroom.
She's down to her bra and jeans when she hears the soft tap on the bathroom door. The red wine has soaked through to slightly stain her white bra pink in places, but she thinks handing him that garment might just be a step too far.
"Coming," she calls, leaving the shirt soaking under a flow of cold water in the sink.
Castle hands her a dark grey cotton shirt around the barely open door, keeping his head out of view.
"Thanks."
"Should fit okay. You guys are about the same size. Can you hand me your shirt and I'll throw it in with some stain remover?"
"This all part of being a gentleman too? You're doing my laundry now, Castle?" she teases.
"Whatever it takes, Kate," he says easily, and she can hear the smile in his voice, the warmth, even if all she can see is his disembodied arm waving in the air for her sopping wet shirt.
"Thanks, partner," she says, handing him the garment once she wrings it out.
"My pleasure, Kate," he adds softly.
And it's only when she turns away to pull the fresh shirt over her head, that she sees that Castle had a full view of her in the mirror the whole time. And she's actually not that disappointed. In fact, she's pretty sure that this is progress.
Alexis' shirt, other than being dark grey to Castle's black, is almost identical – a close-fitting Henley with buttons part way down the front.
"You're determined to get us into matching clothes this evening," she jokes, when she emerges from the bathroom wearing the borrowed shirt and her own jeans. "Team colors."
"Just grabbed what was to hand," says Castle, by way of an excuse.
"Right," replies Kate, clearly not buying it.
"Looks good on you anyway," he remarks, eyes scanning down over her body, making no attempt to disguise the hunger she can clearly see in them either; the desire he always tries to hide from her, but that surfaces now and again when they sail close to the wind.
Kate feels her skin prickle and flush with excitement now that he's openly looking at her, appraising her body, and for once she doesn't want to stop him.
She left the top four buttons undone, and it's sexy, but not too obvious, though if they get back onto that couch in the same position as before, she's pretty sure Castle will be the one enjoying the view this time.
"It's getting late," says Castle, reluctantly offering her an out if she wants it. "You want to continue with the movie or…?"
"Or…?" teases Kate, overtly flirting with him.
And maybe the wine has gone to her head a little. But she doesn't care.
"Kate," he says heavily, voiced laced with a mild warning.
He comes over to stand close to her, taking a massive risk when he leans in and presses a kiss to the top of her head, running his hand briefly down her arm. "I don't want you to go. But if you have to…?" he sighs, letting a long, slow breath escape.
He's so tender and gentle, the kiss so innocent even, that it takes her breath away more than any passion-filled embrace would have.
Her heart is hammering. She lets her fingers tangle with his when she manages to find his hand, and then she tugs him gently back towards the couch.
"Let's finish what we started," she says, setting him back down on the couch first, with the light pressure of her hands on his shoulders, before settling down next to him.
When a scene airs in the movie, depicting police officers carrying the coffin of a fallen comrade, his cap sitting atop the flag-draped casket, Castle tenses noticeably beside her.
"Thinking of Roy?" she asks, turning her head to look at him, so in tune with his moods and the movement of his body beside her that she feels the shift instantly.
"Hard not to, when you see something like that."
"Mmm," murmurs Kate in agreement.
Because on another day, in another sunshine-filled cemetery, what now seems like light years ago, this was them; walking to a solemn beat, bearing the weight of their beloved leader and friend for the very last time.
"You know, the day we carried his coffin…that was one of my proudest days, Kate. That you and Evelyn would ask me to be a part of that," he says, pausing the movie for a second so that they can talk.
Because they've never taken time to discuss any of this before.
"You're part of the team, Castle. Our little cop family. It was right that you were there. It's what Roy would have wanted too," she says, knowing that Roy wanted more for both of them than they even have now. That he all but placed her hand in Castle's that night in the hangar, as a father would for a bride, giving Kate over to her partner for safe-keeping.
She slides round on the couch, moving easily against the leather, until her knees are touching his thigh and she's propped up on one elbow facing him, lying side-by-side.
"You know Roy was always a great champion of yours," she tells him. "Right from the start, when I was kicking and screaming about having you follow me around. I know now, when I think about it rationally, that he could have thrown you out, friend of the mayor's or not," she laughs, letting her hand fall to his knee, as she shakes her head, eyes filled with humor.
"So, why didn't he? Why'd he put up with me?" asks Castle, letting his hand rest on the lower half of her thigh, mirroring her posture.
"He knew you would be good for me, I guess. I was so lost back then, Castle. Driven, but still lost inside. He saw…something in you," she smirks, arching her eyebrow and then shaking her head, lips pressed together.
"And something in you too, maybe?" risks Castle, brushing his thumb over the ripples in her jeans, where the fabric has gathered at her bent knee.
"Maybe," replies Kate, lowering her eyes and feeling her cheeks warm up again as she senses him watching her.
"I never felt more honored to be your partner than I did that day, Kate. To be able to stand beside you, after everything that we'd been through…"
"Rick," warns Kate, flexing her fingers around his wrist, as he wanders so close to painful territory; old ground they haven't yet been brave enough to excavate.
"Kate, please? Hear me out?" he asks, and she instantly relents, letting her head fall heavily onto her own shoulder, so that she's looking up at him from an angle.
"I know how hard it was for you to let me force you out of that hangar. How easily you could have frozen me out, blamed me for Roy's death, refused to ever see me again."
"But I couldn't," Kate tells him, shaking her head again, reaching for his arm and squeezing hard for emphasis. "I couldn't. Never. Not by then. Not when…"
Her phone rings, and they both jump, staring at one another with fat, unshed tears shining in their eyes.
Castle pulls himself together first, reaching over her with a quick muttered apology to hand her her cell phone from the coffee table, as she hangs on to him to prevent herself from falling backwards off the couch when the weight of his body briefly presses against hers.
She turns around, resting back against his arm again, wiping away a tear as she prepares to answer the call.
It's closer to midnight than eleven-thirty now, and Kate glances at her partner before answering, feeling his fingers lightly ghosting over her hair where it drapes over the arm of the couch.
"Espo? What have you got?" she asks, clearing her throat retroactively, when her voice comes out sounding scratchy and choked.
"Sorry, Beckett. Didn't mean to wake you. You said to call if…"
"You…uh…you didn't wake me, Esposito," she says, shaking her head at Castle and holding him in place beside her when he looks like he's about to climb over her to give her privacy to take the call by herself.
"No. Stay," she whispers to him, covering the mouthpiece until he relaxes.
"Beckett?" says Esposito. "You okay?"
"Fine. I'm fine, Javi. So, did you get a deal?" she asks more loudly, laying her hand back on Castle's knee.
"We got a deal. All signed. DA agreed to ten years. Eight for good behavior, if we get this guy, Cristobal, tomorrow. Gates is keen to make a move on him before the jungle drums start beating. Judge signed off on the warrant tonight. What time do you want to set up the op? Ryan and I were thinking six, but we can go in earlier if you think…"
Castle sits upright when he hears the details of the call, the urgency of this operation to take down the kingpin at the head of this supply chain, and the time constraints they're working with.
"Kate, you should go. This is important," he tells her, with such a serious expression on his face, even although she knows that it's costing him personally to let her go.
"Just a second, Javi," she says, before muting the call.
"This is important too," she argues, determined not to let go of the progress they've made tonight, not to let them backslide again into their comfort zone.
"What? John Woo?" asks Castle, looking surprised and confused.
"No," smiles Kate, getting onto her knees beside him. "This," she adds, leaning over to kiss him, her hand sliding around the back of his neck to hold him to her, fingers lightly stroking the velvety skin behind his ear, as their lips meet softly and then part in welcome.
She's gentle, doesn't want to startle him, but when his fingers brush her cheeks and cup her jaw, she reluctantly pulls away, glancing down at her still-live, accursed phone.
"Just…give me a second," she promises, touching the side of his mouth with her fingertips, sweeping her thumb over his chin, as he looks at her with such fragile, desperate hope in his eyes that her heart aches for him.
"Javi? You still there?" she says, clearing her throat again and running a flustered hand through her hair.
"Sorry about that. Castle and I will meet you there just before six to execute the warrant. Get a team in place and text me Cristobal's address," she instructs, adding, "We need to go in prepared for anything. These guys could be heavily armed," before hanging up.
"Kate, are you sure about this…?" Castle asks, already reaching for her.
And she's not sure if he means the forthcoming takedown or what they're about to commit to. All she does know is that it's long past time, and she is so certain. She is so very certain.
"Shhh," she grins, dropping her phone onto the floor with a dull clatter, and then leaning over him, until he has to support her with his arms.
"Never been more sure of anything," she whispers against his cheek, before kissing him again with a complete unleashing of passion this time, winding her arms up around his neck, as they both moan out in pleasure when their aching bodies collide.
A/N: Woohoo! We finally got a kiss. Wonder what the next chapter will bring? CastleCrazie, I'm looking at you! Sorry if this one ran too long for you. I know some people are time limited.
Apologies to anyone who has actually seen Hard Boiled. Kind of had to fudge the story best I could, since I've never watched it myself. Not sure I got the scenes in order. My thanks to IMDB for the trailer.
Enjoy 'Significant Others' whenever it airs for you! Finally able to say Happy Castle Monday again. Liv