Too Sexy For the Law
Chapter 3: Pulling the Plug
"Ya'll are such freaks."
"Kill joy." Tina muttered as he walked passed her towards the TV with Macy's father's toolbox in hand. "You plan on rewiring it?"
"What?" Macy demanded spinning around so quick she almost fell over. "Rewiring? Rewiring what? Jason what are you doing?"
"Relax, The tools are just a back up plan." He assured her setting the toolbox down beside the coffee table. "I'm gonna start with something a little more basic. Tina who had been staring intently at his hands for a while now finally spoke.
"Were you doing dishes?" As Macy's face screwed up on screen at the rather strange and random question Jason looked down to his yellow rubber gloved hands.
"It's for the charge," He snapped defensively. "I don't want to get sucked in too."
"What's going on out there?"
"I believe our little Jason is channeling the spirit of Principal Scudworth," Tina reported. "Tell me?" She inquired of Jason. "Do you have the overwhelming urge to kill John Stamos?" Jason just glared at her.
"Go away and do something else."
Tina smirked pushing herself off of the couch. "Yes Wesley…" She replied in a robotic voice before dashing up the stairs to avoid Jason's wrath. He turned back to Macy's image who was smirking widely. As if she could feel his death glare on her she raised her hands in a show of surrender.
"I didn't say a thing."
"You were thinking it." He deadpanned perching himself on the coffee table. She continued to pick her way through the rocky, slope riddled terrain as Jason began addressing the matter at hand.
"Okay, so, as demonstrated in the past the simplest explanation is always the answer. So give me a recap and be British about it, I want you in character for when you do meet people."
"Would you like to yell action first?"
"Just do it missy miss."
Macy cleared her throat and thought of British actors whose accent she could use as a model and after a moment of deliberation she decided on Kira Knightly. She had seen her enough in King Arthur and the Pirates trilogy to mimic her from memory and the actress in question usually spoke with clear enough enunciation.
"I put the DVD into the player," She began as Jason nodded in approval of her accent; momentarily forgetting that she couldn't see him. "Pressed play the Bob's you uncle Fanny's your aunt I'm in the woods."
"Right. Lets start from there." Jason got to his feet and went to the DVD player "If pushing play got you in then maybe…" he trailed off pushing in the stop button, but there was no change on screen and no Macy to be found in the room. H pushed it a few more times just to make sure but with no such luck.
"Maybe what?" Macy questioned, having no clue as to what he was going on about; without the luxury of seeing what was going on she could only guess.
"Hmmm…" Jason muttered to himself. "Or maybe eject…" But just like the last try nothing exciting happened aside from the tray sliding out to produce the disk.
"Maybe what?" Macy ranted as Jason removed the DVD and turned it over to see a familiar discoloration. "What is going on out there?"
Jason quickly replaced the item in question; though it was the DVD player itself that was responsible for Macy's predicament, the disk did have a part to play and Jason was not about to take chances. "Nothing," he replied. "my theory was a dud." He removed the gloves and tossed them onto the table moodily just as Tina bounded down the steps with a large bowl of popcorn in hand.
"Hello all, still stuck I see." She sounded entirely too chipper for Macy's liking, who showed it by glaring in what she could only assume was Tina's direction.
"My theory didn't work as well as I'd hoped." Jason informed while helping himself to the bowl Tina still held.
"So back to the drawing board then." Tina sighed as she set the bowl down, some of her chipperness fading. There was a silence as they attempted to think, the only sound was the distinct crackle of microwave popcorn being munched on.
Macy's stomach growled at the sound letting her know that it was hungry and wanted to be feed. Realizing she hadn't eaten since she'd grabbed a bagel at Tim's that morning, she glared again. "I hate you both so much right now."
"Oh, you're just cranky cause you're hungry." Jason commented finishing his handful.
"And thirsty…" Macy confirmed noticing also how dry her mouth was.
"Oo good idea." Tina darted back up the stairs and again Macy glared.
"You're going to get wrinkles if you keep pulling that face." Jason chided with amusement in his voice.
"So much…"
"Just hang tight a bit longer, we'll figure it out."
"I don't know how much of this I can take Jay, it's starting to get dark on my end." The atmosphere in Sherwood was starting to dim; the change in the air gave everything a bluish wash as day faded into night. The air grew colder and damper and Macy wrapped her arms around herself as she trudged on through the wilderness.
"Okay," Tina addressed Jason bounding back down the steps and holding out two cans of soda. "7up or Sussex?"
"Why can't I have the Pepsi?" He indicated the third can nestled in the crook of her arm.
"Because it's the last one and I went to get it which means I saw it first." She stated firm in her belief of the playground rule 'finders keepers'.
Jason on the other hand didn't put so much faith in the age-old saying and as a child developed one of his own 'if you want to keep it you'll have to hang on to it'. Though knowing him since childhood she had an advantage and managed to dart out of reach as he made a grab for the can. Tina tossed the other two cans into the cushiony embrace of the sofa as she took the Pepsi in hand and held it protectively. "Come here Teeny…" Jason called as she darted to the other side of the room, putting the pool table between them and crying out in defiance 'Never!'
Macy, though only receiving the audio of the strange little escapade could picture it all too clearly in her mind, she planted her face in her hand and shook her head in despair. "I can't believe my entire existence rests in the hands of these two." She muttered to herself as the struggle continued.
Jason tall and gangly in stature hopped up and over the pool table before Tina had time to pull back the tab on the can. With a girlish squeal she bolted in the other direction and Jason turned to cut her off on the other side. The pair met on the other side of the table at a run; Tina holding the can at arms length to keep it away from him and Jason trying to use his height and long arms to reach over her. The struggling duo hit the back of the couch leaving Tina with nowhere else to go. She switched hands before he could grab his prize and while she pushed him away with her now free hand she threw out her other arm to keep the can out of reach. When her arm shot out the can slipped out of her grasp to sail through the air, everything at that point seemed to slow down. Tina gasped as her and Jason both watched wide-eyed with horror as the can of Pepsi connected with the DVD player. There was a blinding flash to which they quickly shielded their eyes, when the spots faded the can was gone.
There was a moment of delay before a brilliant light made Macy halt. From the middle of the light an object came hurling towards her head. With a strangled squeal of surprise instinct took over and her hands shot up to catch the can millimeters away from her nose. She stood there frozen a moment blinking repeatedly before pulling her hands away from her face and observing the shiny blue object.
"Oo hello sweet karma!" She cried gleefully planting a kiss on the logo and ripping back the tab. A bit shaken up it hissed and fizzed over but Macy paid no attention to it and she slurped happily as the fizzy brown liquid dripped from her hand.
"Mine!" Tina and Jason whined in protest as the shocked silence wore off. Macy gave a very unladylike snort. "Come n' get it suckers." She continued to drink the sweet and blessedly cold liquid before it sunk in. "Where did this come from?"
"That's a very interesting question." Jason began as he attempted to come up with an equally interesting answer but Tina cut him off before one could be found.
"We just sort of went WOOSH n' it went WOOSH n' then it all went WOOSH, you know what I mean?" Jason's mouth had fallen open as he analyzed the babble and Macy blinked a few times.
"So you let it go, it hit the DVD player and disappeared."
"How did you understand that!" Jason demanded astonished.
"Well it was kind of obvious when you think about it."
Like times before when his female friends began using a language all their own Jason decided to just smile and nod like he knew what they were talking about. But since Macy couldn't see him he settled on a quiet 'mmhmm' instead.
"I wonder…" Tina mused out loud as she scooped up a cushion and twirled it lazily a few times before whipping it at the entertainment center where it bounced off with a dull 'thwap'.
"Stop throwing things at it!" Macy cried indignantly.
"Okay, so we know now that the connection between our reality and the reality of Robin Hood is still open." Jason began, his mind turning over the situation in attempt to find a solution. "I suspected as much."
"You said your idea bombed." Macy reflected leaning against an oak tree.
"But I wasn't wrong! Pressing play did get you in, it's just that pressing stop didn't work to get you out."
"You mean it's broken."
"I think there may be some internal problems yes." He took a breath and steeled himself for the explosion he new was about to happen. "I'd like to open it up and take a look at the wiring."
"What!" Macy shrieked panic stricken and right on cue. "What did I say about rewiring things Jason? I said no, not going to happen."
"Calm down, I'm not talking about trying to fix it myself. I just want to take a look and see if it needs to be taken to someone who can."
Macy sighed, it was a reasonable request if it meant her freedom but she was sensing there was something more. "Why do I feel a 'but' coming on."
"But," Jason affirmed, "to do that I'll have to… unplug it…"
"And breaking the connection." Macy finished for him.
"You mean she could get stuck in there." Tina turned on Jason.
"Theoretically the connection should reopen once it's plugged back in with the disk still inside."
"But you don't know."
"That's why I said theoretically."
"No." Tina stated firmly folding her arms across her chest. "We can't risk trapping her there."
"She'll be trapped there anyway if we just sit around and do nothing."
There was a pause in the arguing and thought she couldn't see them Macy knew they were looking at her, it was on her to settle the matter. The stakes were high; it was her life they were playing Russian roulette with after all, if someone was going to pull the trigger it was going to be her. She took a deep cleansing breath.
"Do it." As the words fell from her mouth the others began speaking as one. Tina protesting with outraged indignation and Jason asking for conformation with doubtful concern, Macy quickly raised her hands to silence them. "Just do it now before I change my mind."
Snatching up the remote Jason cut the power to both the TV and the DVD player and as Tina sunk to the couch in a state of shock he unplugged the wires from the machine. He set the seemingly harmless metal box onto the coffee table and knelt down on the floor beside it.
"What have we done…" Tina muttered as Jason opened up the toolbox, his jaw clenched he could think of nothing to say.
0o0o0
Macy didn't even bother to call out, both the buzzing sensation and the strange echoes that had plagued her since she woken were gone now. A cold breeze picked up causing the dead leaves that blanketed the forest floor to dance around her bare feet mockingly. It was only as she wrapped her arms around herself that she realized just how cold and dark it had gotten. Though her night vision had adjusted it's self with the gradually fading sunlight, it was still hard to see too far into the distance and after only a few feet she was very surprised to find herself no longer entrapped within the forests of Sherwood.
It seemed that all the while she'd stopped to talk freedom was within spitting distance. She stood with the forest at her back, grassy meadow before her and a wide smile on her face. A light euphoric sensation of freedom washed over her, the excess adrenaline went to her head like a shot of tequila; that coupled with the fact that no one was watching, Macy took off up at a run up a nearby hill like a frolicking faun. Instead of the brittle and even sharp leaves, twigs and tree roots she'd gotten used to soft grass, weeds and wildflowers were caught in between her toes. She reached the top of the hill out of breath and marveled at the sight before her. The hill sloped downward and out into a small English village, the buildings shrouded in shadow with only the lamp and firelight shinning through the windows indicating people living within.
With the moon only a quarter visible it was hard to distinguish just what village it was and Macy plopped down to sit with her legs crossed. The fact that she was still technically lost did nothing to foul her good mood, she had found civilization… more or less and that was good enough for her. She sat there for the better part of an hour, as low fog rolled over the landscape. She thought about the very real possibility of meeting the local, it was not a meeting she was looking forward to; no matter how many scenarios she envisioned in her mind she didn't see it going well.
Her stomach gave another low growl and a painful twitch reminding her that it still hadn't been fed. Kicking herself even before she moved, Macy got to her feet and brushed off her damp jeans as she started her way down the slope. She attempted stealth but with the ground wet with condensation she found herself sitting back down more than once. Crouching behind a small cart she scoped out her surroundings and formulated a plan. She hated the thought of stealing from the already poor people of the village, but on the other hand she really doubted her knowledge of edible English plant life. If it was a matter of gathering food in the woods at home sure, but where she was at the moment the chances of her consuming something poisonous or even hallucinogenic were entirely to high. And the only worse thing Macy could think of then wandering around 12th century Nottingham was wandering around 12th century Nottingham while high.
It seemed she would have to resort to thievery if she were going to survive; her moral dilemma went as follows - Robin Hood steals and people adore him, But he steals from the rich to give to the poor not from the rich to stuff his face, but even Robin Hood's got to eat. As her thoughts ran away on her Macy's eyes focused themselves on a very large structure on the other side of the tiny hamlet. A sly smile spread across her face as the idea came to her fully formed, and crouching low to avoid being seen Macy began to pick her way across the village.
Keeping an eye out for guards Macy neared the large manor where the local lord no doubt resided, she moved around to the rear entrance, most likely the servant's entrance and listened under the window. There was no sound from inside so she risked a peek; it was a small scullery and she could see thorough to another door leading into the kitchen. A figure moved across the doorway and she quickly ducked down, heart pounding; when it became clear she had not been seen she moved to the door. It opened with little resistance and blessedly nearly no sound, peering through the doorway to the kitchen revealed that the figure had moved on to another room. With the kitchen empty Macy, staying as quietly as humanly possible scurried inside.
The room was warm and dry from the fire but knowing someone could walk in at any moment made her wanted to leave as quickly as she could. Though the rush was intoxicating, the knowledge that what she was doing could mean the loss of a hand or worse kept her mind focused. There was half of a pot of stew sitting near the fire the smell of which only intensified her hunger, though being impossible to get away with Macy moved on to more practical food items. Scooping up a knife she carved herself off a hunk of bread and some sort of soft cheese and grabbing a bit of linen; the medieval equivalent of a dishtowel, she arranged the items into a bundle and added to it a leg from the remains of a roast chicken.
At the sound of approaching voices and footsteps Macy darted back towards the scullery and pausing only to snatch a few carrots from a basket she retreated back into the cool night air. Tying the ends of the cloth together and securing the entire bundle to her belt to free up her hands Macy breathed a sigh of relief. It was the perfect crime; she was free and clear and any sensible person in her place would be making a quick getaway. But Macy was inquisitive by nature and really wanted to know where she was, creeping around the building she peeked in every window hoping to get a glimpse of the residing lord incase it was one she recognized.
She did not expect who she did see when peering over the ledge of the fourth window, or rather really hoped she wouldn't. There standing in the main area of the dwelling where the evening meal had no doubt just taken place was Sir Guy of Gisborne, in the leather.
A/N: Sorry this took so long but after the last episode inspiration sort of bitch slapped me. I reworked the setting to post We Are Robin Hood and only a tiny bit of the plotline so a running gag that I had come up with is now more of a plot point. You're all probably sick of just Macy and her friends but next chapter we'll see more of Gisborne and even more of the Outlaws.
MyDearDelirious