Chapter 3
Adam swam, breathing water in and out. He was not surprised that he could do this. It was so simple. His lungs filled with water, and they expelled it again, effortlessly...
And maybe gills had begun to form on his neck. She had kissed him the last time... maybe that was the reason why.
Maybe he could stay here forever, not have to go back to Collinwood, where there was no room for him. He could stand Collinwood less and less each day. They only thing that brought him pleasure was painting, and even that was palling... but if he could paint the bottom of the sea as it was, if he could paint her...
He came to the place of the giant boulders. It had seemed a palace the last time... maybe it was her palace, only it changed it appearance when she was not there.
It was a striking place. The boulders, upright, were as tall as men. They might be men by their general shape. And the seaweed growing in them resembled hair.
It was like Stonehenge, or Easter Island. There was a hint of ancient rites, of ageless secrets...
A Gallery of Ancients. That's what it was. And he was an interloper. Or a welcome guest? Where they studying him? Deciding if he was Worthy?
He knew that she would let him know when the time came. And now that he saw her approach, he forgot about the boulders. He just went to her eager for what she offered him.
"I still do not understand it." Barnabas said to Julia "I can accept it better now, and maybe I will go to Reverent Trask's service, but why should I be singled out?"
"Why not?"
"I mean, of all the people who were there, why me?"
"Because you are the one who got up and faced Violet, who took her in your arms. And you needed it."
"You think?"
"You know, there was no real reason why you could not have held a cross in your hands all those years."
"You mean that Willie was right and it was psychosomatic?"
"Well, Willie this time was right."
Adam looked at himself in the mirror. Did any of it show? He looked at his neck. There were folds of skin. There. Were they turning into gills?
He ran his hand over his neck. Yes, the folds were there, but the gills had not opened yet.
They would open soon. His body was changing. Or was it? She had promised him that he would join her.
And the next time he saw her...
She had never spoken, how could she without the air to make a sound through her larynx? But they managed to communicate. How did she tell him the things she did? How did he get to ask questions of her? Were they reading each other's minds? Or had they developed a language of gestures so that he could read each and every one of the flickers of her tail?
He still did not know much about her, Were there more like her? She had mentioned her people, once...
And the place of the boulders.. Did it mean anything at all? Did it have to do with her religion?... Did she have a religion at all?
In any case, he doubted that they would have any painters It is impossible to paint under water.
But there are other art forms, and he could find them, once he joined her...
He closed his eyes and saw again the tall boulders, the swaying seaweed, and he wondered, had the stones been alive once?
Why did he wonder about it? What did it matter? She would tell him all the secrets, should he need to know them.
"Adam?" Carolyn came up the stairs "Can I come up?'
"It is your home." he said "Of course, you can.:"
She could hear the hurt in his voice. She had hurt him deeply, she realized...
"If your mother was like you, then no wonder your father ran out on her." Quentin's words stung her, had she driven Adam away?"
"I am sorry, Adam."
"Sorry? What about? Are you sorry you married me? Do you want a divorce and came to discuss terms?"
"I have been unjust with you. I blamed you for something you had nothing to do with... I was so angry.."
"What were you so angry bout?'
"That I was forced to have Uncle Roger treated,"
'Well, you should have done it without being forced to. You see how much better he is."
'But it is the principle of the thing."
"Anyway, as you said I had nothing to do with it."
'No, it was not."
"But you punished me for it anyway. I spent a lot of time wondering what I had done to offend you. And you giving me the silent treatment and looking daggers at me all the time, for nothing that I had done."
"It hurt me greatly."
"And I wasn't hurt then? Or I did not matter?
"I am sorry. I want to change that..."
"You mean that you did not come to ask me for a divorce?"
"No!\
"Why not? If we did you'd find someone you like better. There are plenty of good looking studs out there. Pick any one... I am only yesterday's stud."
"You are more than that."
"More? when did you consider me or my feelings, or bothered to ask my opinion? No, you wanted me only for stud service. That I delivered. I was foolish enough to ask for more. I know my place now."
"Adam!"
"Just tell me what my duties are, and I will fulfill them. Just do me the courtesy of pretending that you care for me."
She flinched at his words.
Had he hurt her? he wondered. Good! Then she'd know how it felt.
Barnabas felt awkward coming into the church. He had not been inside one for... for longer that he could count.
"I still can't understand it."
"So don't understand. Just accept it."
"I accepted it. Where do I go from here?"
"This is a start."
"Yes.." he looked around. "It's been years since I was inside. I have forgotten what I am supposed to do. I am not sure what it is I believe."
"Now it is a good time to find out." Trask took Barnabas' arm. "Come, I'll show you around."