I just stared at Brittany in awe as she came into the room, I quickly had to remember how to breath and that I had to shut my mouth or I would start drooling and that would be very unattractive. I couldn't believe that this Rachel girl was her roommate, I would have come to visit a long time ago if I had known.

I must have looked like an idiot just staring at her, at least I managed to say something. I was in shock and when you're in shock you can't really function or at least that's what I'm like.

Brittany kind of looked at me funny, I think she was in shock I was in her room. I think she was trying to process what was happening right now, I could tell she wasn't all that happy to see me. I could see it in her eyes, those big blue beautiful eyes. Even when she looked mad or annoyed her eyes still looked amazing I couldn't manage to look away.

She stared at me some more, I think she was trying to figure out what to say, I know I had caught her off guard, she had done the same to me. This wasn't how I envisioned meeting her again, now she probably thinks I came to her room just to see her when the truth is I didn't even know she lived here. Yeah I came into her residence but I would never just wait in her room for her to come back, I felt very out of place.

"What are you doing here?" She finally said to me.

"I came to visit Rachel... my friend." I said. Was Rachel my friend? I guess since I was in her room and she did seem happy to see me when I came. I had said it out loud so its not like I could pull back what I said.

"You know Rachel?" She asked me.

"Yeah."

"Oh yes," Rachel said really perky.

"When did you meet?" I knew she was testing me.

"Oh, we met a couple of d..." I quickly cut Rachel off before she could spoil everything. I didn't want Brittany to know I made friends with her just so I could see the blue-eyed goddess again.

"Months ago, we met a couple of months ago, right Rachel," I looked at her sharply. Thankfully she was sitting behind me so Brittany couldn't see the look I was giving Rachel. Thankfully she wasn't one of those slow people that took forever to catch onto hints. Rachel nodded slowly.

"Oh, yeah. We go way back," Rachel said.

"A couple months ago isn't way back, even I know that," Brittany said.

"Well it feels like we've known each other for ages, right Rachel?" I give her the look again.

"Oh yes! We are such great friends."

"Mhm," is the only thing Brittany manages to say. I think she doesn't really believe us, I'm usually great and lying to people but for some reason I really it's really hard to lie to her, I look to Rachel for help but she's looking at Brittany.

"So how did you guys meet?"

"My mum is friends with her mum, they played Tennis together," Rachel said. I was surprised with the back-story Rachel gave. I didn't complain, I looked back at Brittany who seemed satisfied with the story but she still rolled her eyes because she still didn't enjoy my company.

"I see, so you just came here to talk to Rachel?" She asked me raising her eyebrow.

"Actually, funny story, she came here because she's in lo..." I cut her off again, jeeze this girl really can't keep her mouth shut.

"Yes, I came here to visit her."

"Well, you visited, now go." Brittany said.

"What?" I asked in shock, I knew she wouldn't be thrilled seeing me but I didn't think she would be so harsh. She always seemed too sweet and innocent.

"I said leave," Brittany said turning away from me.

"Brit, what's you problem," Rachel asked suddenly.

"I don't want her in my room," Brittany said looking at me sharply. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach, it started to turn and I couldn't help but feel crushed.

"Well it's my room too and if I want her here then here she will stay," I couldn't believe Rachel was standing up for me only after a few days of knowing her.

"Then I'll leave," Brittany said.

No Brittany couldn't go, I had come this close to having another conversation with her again. Well I guess we had a conversation moments ago but all she did was bitch to me. I don't blame her, I had done it to her all of high school, I guess this was her way for getting back at me for all the hurt I caused. I still couldn't live that down, it made me want to cry for how much I hurt her and that's rare because Santana Lopez never cries for anyone.

Rachel kept looking back at Brittany and me trying to figure out our history, I could tell it was confusing the hell out of her. She was going to figure it out eventually so I just went right for it, I didn't want Brittany to hate me forever, I couldn't, she had made an affect on me, an affect that I couldn't forget. I haven't had a full conversation with her and she's already invading all my thoughts and dreams, that has to mean something.

"Britt please stay," I say calmly, I feel that I'm about to cry but I can't show it.

"Don't call me that," She snapped. "You don't have the right."

"Please, I'm sorry."

"Yeah I hardly doubt that. I remember what you used to do. I remember how all the teachers always made you apologize for throwing slushies at people or bitching to us, you always had to be set up to apologize, it never came naturally to you so tell me, who set you up to it this time!"

I couldn't have felt more awful.

"No one did. I'm a chanced person I promise."

"Bull shit."

"You don't even know me, I haven't seen you in two years! How do you know if I've changed or not? Please don't dwell in the past, just get over it," I say standing up and raising my voice a little. She looks at me in shock, I realize that I've just raised my voice and I feel awful. "I'm so sorry."

"Are you serious! Of course you haven't changed! You shot me with a paintball for gods sake! Is that your new slushy!" It wasn't a question.

"Wait, she was the one that shot you with a paintball?" Rachel said, pause. Then she burst out laughing, I looked at her confused. "When Brit came home covered in paint! You just made my life!"

"Shut up Rach!" Brittany snapped.

"You should have seen her, she came in all bubbly and happy, I thought she would have been mad but she wasn't, and then she kept babbling how she had the most amazing day ever," I looked over to Brittany who was dying from embarrassment.

Then it clicked, Brittany came back happy, even after she yelled at me. She came back happy because I shot her with a paintball, that's got to mean something! Maybe she likes me! Wait, I should calm down and not look too much into the situation before I get hurt. I didn't even know if she swings that that. I couldn't help it, I was so excited but I tried to contain it.

"You were happy?" I asked.

"No! Of course not! You shot me with a paint ball! Why would I be happy!"

I could see right through her lie.

"What? But you were..." Brit quickly cut Rachel off.

"Can you shut up!" Brittany snapped again and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Sorry Santana, she's just in a grumpy mood right now," Rachel told me.

"Because she is here!" Brittany said pointing to me.

"Please Britt, can you give me a chance to make it up to you?"

"Why do you want to make it up to me so badly? What about all the other people you bullied, what about them? You haven't made it up to anyone them!"

"How do you know that!" I ask.

"Well have you?"

"No." I say honestly. This is the most honestly I've been to someone in a long time.

"Exactly, so why do you want to be my friend?"

"I donno, there's just something about you."

"Well find someone else because according to you two years ago, there are hundreds of me's out there who are just as loserish and we all deserve to be slushied. So go make friends with them."

"I was a stupid kid back then, I didn't mean any of it," I say.

"I think you should give her another chance Brit," Rachel said, ok I know this girl was annoying but she wasn't all that bad. After all she was helping me get Brittany.

"No thanks," she said giving me a look. Man if looks could kill. I felt like my insides had all melted and not in the good way. I could feel like legs getting weak and my energy just dropped down.

"I understand," I said in a small voice. "I think I'll go now."

"You don't have to," Rachel said.

"I think it would be best."

"I agree with her," Brittany said coldly towards me.

"I'm really sorry for disturbing you."

I'm about to head out when I remembered something, I still have Brittany's card I was going to give it back to her, its not like I'm going to be coming to visit anytime soon now that I know she really hates me. I reach into my pocket and search for it, I see Brittany still looking at me, I feel like her eyes are daggers.

"Here, you dropped this the other day, I wanted to return it," I say handing her the card.

"Oh thanks," she said not that friendly. I walk out of the room hearing the door close behind me my head drifted down, I had really screwed up.

Brittany's Point of View

Santana had just left, thank god. I really couldn't stand that girl, after all the things she did to me in high school I had enough and who does she think she is trying to get another chance. I don't think so. I looked over to Rachel who was staring at me she didn't look too impressed.

"What?" I ask.

"You really didn't have to be so harsh," she said.

"You came after she left! The year after she graduated, you have no idea what she put me through."

"You're right I don't."

"Exactly."

"So tell me," Rachel said.

I knew I should tell Rachel, she was my best friend after all, we were in Glee club together, she wanted to be a star and I wanted to dance so we didn't take up each others light. We made friends right away, oh course she came when I entered grade 11 but at least she came.

"She threw slushies in my face, slammed me into lockers, she did everything to make my life hell," I yell, not because I'm mad at Rachel but because I'm so wound up by how infuriating Santana makes me.

"Ok, that seems bad but if you ask me it looks like she's changed and she wants to make it up to you."

"I don't care."

"Why? You love giving people second chances you always see the good in people so why is this so different?"

"It just is okay!" I tell her.

"You can tell me Brittany."

"There's nothing to tell," I say stubbornly.

"Then why are you making such a big deal out of this?"

"I'm not you are!"

"Then why are you yelling? Sometimes it's better to talk about things Britt, it might make you feel better," there she goes again trying to give me a lecture.

"I don't want to talk about it Rach, can you please drop it."

"But she's nice and obviously likes you! She wants to be your friend!"

"That's the problem okay!"

"You don't want another friend?"

"No! I course I want her as a friend! But I can't do that to myself not again!" I yell, I can feel the tears creeping up on my, I try to hold them back but a few escape my grasp and they trickle down. I try to whip them away before Rachel see's but I'm not quick enough.

"Britt, what do you mean again?" she asks me more calmly.

"After everything she did to me back then, I still... I... looked I really liked her back then okay, like really liked her, I might have even loved her. I don't know, I just... she hurt me so much, I would come home crying and broken and after all that I still liked her, I don't want that to happen again."

Rachel knew I swung both ways and she was cool with it, she had two dads after all but that wasn't the scary part, the scary part just happened. I had never told anyone how much I liked Santana back in high school. I hated myself for loving her but I did and I didn't want that to happen again.

Britt.." she said, I could tell she didn't know what to say.

"It doesn't matter anyway, she's straight, she only wants to be friends." At this moment I realize that I'm practically balling my eyes out crying as hard as I can and I hate it. I try to control my tears but they just keep coming out. Rachel moves closer to me and gives me a hug.

"Britt, I had no idea. I'm sorry."

"There was just something about her, and then when I saw her again, when she shot me with a paintball I... I know she did change, I remembered people talking at school in senior year about how she had changed. When I saw her I didn't want to believe it, it was the only thing that let me hate her. To push her away."

"Maybe just take the chance. What's the worst thing that will happen?"

"I could fall for her again. Rach, do you know how hard it is to love someone when they don't love you back. It's horrible."

"I know, but honestly you don't know if she's into you or not."

"Oh course she's not, she was dating Puck, the most popular guy in high school."

"So."

"That day, when I got shot with a paintball, he was there with her."

"Oh."

"Yeah! They're probably still dating."

"You don't know that."

"I have a pretty good idea."

"Your jumping to conclusions, you haven't seen this girl in over two years, of course some things have changed but you know nothing about her life so don't pretend you do." Rachel always sets me straight.

"Still she dated him in high school and..." she cut me off again.

"So, you dated Artie." She told me.

"Well yeah, I swing both ways and I was trying to cover up the fact I like girls," I told her.

"She could have been doing the same thing."

"I doubt it. Besides I got over her, it doesn't matter anymore, I'm done with her. I'm sick of getting hurt."

"I'm not saying you should just jump into another friendship with her but I can see it's hurting you more to stay away from her and be mad then to forgive her."

"No, I can't. I hate her!"

"Do you really?" Rachel asked me. She could always see through me, I always hated that, I could never lie to this girl she always saw right through it.

"Yes."

"Britt."

I sighed. "No."

"Exactly."

"I just don't know if I can deal with that, at least not right now."

"I get that. Take your time just please don't let this control your life. I don't like seeing you so sad."

"It won't, I promise," I tell her.

"Good, you know sometimes I worry about you Britt."

"Worry less."

"You know I can't do that," she smiles. I know that, she knows that, she's always in my business trying to protect me. I don't mind it, its nice to know there's someone in your life you can really count on.

A couple of weeks past and I haven't seen Santana since that day she came to my door room and gave me back my key. I have to say as much as I'm trying to fight it I can't stop thinking about her, I feel like I'm a freshman again or a sophomore back in high school thinking about my crush.

I have to get her out of my mind, I'm through with all the hurting and getting my hopes up only for them to be broken down again. I don't understand why she would want to be my friend anyway, she never showed any interest back in high school, the only thing she was sure of was how to make my life miserable.

My mind needed a break from all this thinking so I decided to go to my dance studio; that should help get my mind off of things. There was a class going on when I entered but thankfully there were different dance rooms so I went into an empty one and blast the music. I moved with the music trying to get my routine right, I had a show coming up soon and I wanted my piece to be perfect.

After a long days work out I went for my water bottle and chugged it down, I didn't realize how out of breath I was until I started drinking. I heard the door open and saw my good friend Mike come in with the biggest smile on his face.

"Hey Brit!"

"Hey Mike," I said.

"Your dance is really coming along," he told me.

"Thanks, I really want it to be perfect."

"I'd say it's perfect."

He was a little hesitance I could tell there was a reason he came to talk to me, he was fidgeting with his fingers and I know he only does that when he's nervous. I knew he wasn't asking me out because he had his girlfriend Tina who happened to be a good friend of mine and went to high school with me. She was one of the other targets Santana used to slushy.

"Just ask," I said.

"How did you...?"

"Come on, I've known you forever, ask me."

"Okay, well I have this friend and he saw you dancing... well I might have told him you were an amazing dancer so he wanted to come watch, and he really liked you..." Mike started to say.

"Where's this going?" I ask.

"Well I kind of owe him a favor because he introduced me to Tina, so he was wondering, well he wanted me to ask you if you would go on a date with him?"

"Oh."

"Would you? Just one date? Please as a favor to me."

"Well I..." he cut me off.

"Here I'll show you a picture of him," Mike pulled out his phone and went onto facebook scrolling through a bunch of name until he reached a James Henry, I looked at it. He wasn't that bad looking, I could totally see myself dating someone like this but the truth is I'm not really in the mood to date.

I know this was a favor to Mike and he was one of my best friends, maybe one date wouldn't hurt. I could test the waters again try dating. I haven't dated anyone since middle of my senior year and that didn't end too well. That was the year I came out, I dated a girl for at least 6 months until she broke my heart.

"So...?"

"Sure, I guess," I say.

"Thanks Britt, I promise I'll make it up to you," he tells me.

"Ice cream?"

"You want ice cream?" I nodded.

"Yeah ok, tomorrow we'll go, I promised Tina we'd have a date night today," he told me.

"Where are you going?" I asked, I love getting in peoples business, especially when it involves relationships. I don't like when people get involved in my dating life but I like to get involved in others.

"I'm taking her to this nice restaurant called Generosity, the new one down the street."

"Oh yeah I heard of that, let me know how it is."

"The date or the food?"

"Both!" I say smiling.

"Cool, you hanging with Kurt tonight?"

"I think, I haven't seen that boy in ages."

Mike looked at me again, great I've attracted more attention to myself, I'm not one to try and grab people's attention. I like to keep to myself and just get on with what I need to do.

"You okay? You seem a little off today?"

"Yeah, I've just... never mind." Stupid! I say to myself, now I really know he's going to ask what's wrong. I can never just keep my mouth shut.

"I can help you if you want."

"It's okay, can you just have Tina call me?" I ask.

If anyone can help me it's Tina, she was there when Santana slushied us, she was there when I got pushed into locket and got made fun of, she was there for everything. She would defiantly know how to get Santana off my mind, she would remind me why she was such a bad person and that I should focus on something else.

That was a perfect idea, I don't know why I hadn't thought of calling Tina before.

"Oh yeah sure."

"Thanks, sorry its just, something that she'll understand. A high school thing."

"Of course," he said with a smile. "I'll let her know.

"Thanks Mike! Now go get ready for your date."

Let me know what you think? Hope you all liked the chapter!