The morning sun crept into the room waking me up. I should have been really frustrated by this but I was so comfy I really didn't care. I opened my eyes and looked around the room remembering that I was with Santana, my head was resting on her stomach and she was holding me close, no wonder I felt so safe. I want to walk up like this every morning.
I looked up and saw that Santana was already up and she was looking at me. Once she saw me looking back she smiled, it gave me a fluffy feeling inside. I really liked cuddling with her, she was so warm and after everything that happened last night I was glad to wake up to a smiling face. She made everything seem right, she made it seem like it was just us too in the world and all my problems had disappeared.
"Hey," she said to me.
"Hey." I said back.
"You feeling better?" She was asking about last night, about the text and everything that had happened.
"I really don't feel like talking about it," I say, I don't want to get sad again, I know I will cry if I talk about it and right now I just want to be happy. Yesterday took a lot out of me and I'm really to have some fun today.
"That's fine, but then I want to do something so you have a great day today," she always knew what to say or what to do, I just loved that about her.
"What did you have in mind?" I asked her.
"You said you liked the park and ducks so I was thinking we could spend the day there and then grab some lunch or something," she told me. That sounded like a date but I wasn't about to ask her about it, I didn't want to screw up anything. She was probably just suggesting that to get my mind off of things and that's all. I could think it was a date though, I don't care if she didn't think that, I was happy to spend the whole day with her.
"I like that idea!" I told her excitedly. "Can we feed the ducks again? There's so cute the way they waddle and come up to us to eat the food!" Santana laughed, it was nice to hear her laugh.
"Anything you want Britt-Britt," she told me.
"Thanks," I said cheerfully. She made me feel so alive inside, I wish I could just grab her and kiss her.
"How about we have some breakfast and then we get going?" She asked me and I could only nod. "Pancakes okay?" Pancakes are my favorite so I nod furiously.
00000000000000
Santana and I walked around the park side by side, she looked so pretty with the wind blowing in her hair and the sun shining in her face. All I wanted was to reach down and hold her hand but I didn't have enough courage to go for it. Instead I sped up my pace so I was just a little ahead of her, I was so nervous.
Even though Santana was not mine... yet, I was so thankful for her. She was the sweetest most caring person I'd ever met. I knew I could always count on her if I was feeling sad or just needed a hug. She was there for me, especially last night when she took care of me. I felt so safe in her arms like the whole world just disappeared and nothing could hurt me. She made me feel so special, I wish she was mine.
We walked down the path looking at all the nature. I saw butterflies flying past us and was so tempted to go and chase them, I started skipping after them, they looked so free how they flew off without a care in the world. As I skipped after them I could hear Santana laughing behind me, I don't think she as laughing at me thou, I think she was laughing with me.
The tree's were so green and the grass was soft, I never really thought Santana would be into nature but here she is, walking in the park with me so I guess I was wrong. We walked further up ahead and that's when I saw the most exciting thing ever. There was an ice cream cart not too far ahead of us. My eyes practically bulged out of my head, I wanted an ice cream! I love ice cream. I turned to Santana who was smiling at me, I think she knew what I was going to ask.
"Please?" I asked her while doing my famous pout.
"You know I can't say know to your pout," she said smiling, I bounced up with joy and made my way over towards the cart.
There were so many flavors to choose from how could I decide on just one. I must have spent five minutes looking at all the flavors they had until it finally stood out for me. It was a swirly ice cream stick with chocolate and strawberry mixed in together. It looked so good, I wanted it.
"Can I have that one please?" I said pointing to the swirly ice cream picture.
"I'm sorry miss but we're running low on those and saving them for later in the day," I felt a rush of sadness come over me.
"Are you serious! That had to be the stupidest thing I ever heard," I could tell Santana wasn't too happy, once again she was protecting me. She was really mad at the ice cream guy.
"I'm sorry but that's just the way it works. Can't your friend buy another ice cream?" Santana looked at him as if he was stupid.
"Britt here wants that ice cream and that only and what she wants she gets. You still have ice cream left so if you have some give it too her. You wouldn't deprive a child of their ice cream so you're not going to do that to my Britt either. So either you give her that ice cream or you'll have me go all lima heights on your ass, do we have an understanding?" Santana said very harshly. The guy looking at her in shock and nodded him head very fast. It looked funny, like one of those bobble heads you can get, that made me laugh.
"One swirly ice cream coming right up," the man said still scared for his life.
"That's what I like to hear," Santana said as he handed me my ice cream. I went to my wallet to get money out but I felt a hand over mine to tell me to stop looking. I looked up to see Santana smiling back at me, her hand over mine filled my stomach with so many butterflies I had to try and contain my smile.
"I'll pay for it, don't worry," Santana said.
"But I..." she cut me off when she put her hand to my mouth shaking her head. I smiled against her hand, I think she could feel it because she smiled back.
"I'll pay for it okay, don't worry," she said.
"Thanks San," she made me feel so special inside, even the smallest things she did for me seemed like the biggest things in the whole wide world.
I got my ice cream as Santana paid for me and when I tasted it, it felt like my mouth was filled with jumping beans. It was so good! Santana and I started to walk off from the ice cream guy when he did something I really wish he hadn't. I didn't expect him to be so mean, he seemed like he'd be a sweet guy if Santana didn't scare him. He through an ice cream cone right at my back, so that I had a big chocolate stain on my nice shirt.
"Stupid bitch!" He yelled to me. Those words cut into me like knives making me want to cry because everyone always called me stupid especially in high school. It hurt.
It felt so cold and sticky, I felt myself want to cry but I knew that would be really pathetic so I tried to hold it in. I think Santana noticed that my eyes were getting watery because she got really angry. She whipped her head around at the guy fuming with anger. I had only seen her this way in high school and that was her scary side.
"Listen here you pathetic little shit! How dare you do that to Brittany! She's sweet and caring and more then the person you will ever be. I warned you," she raced back towards him, I think she was about to throw a punch or something at him so I quickly reached for her hand and held onto it tight pulling her away.
"Just leave it please, it's not even that big of a deal," I told her trying to sound convincing.
"Not that big of a deal! Britt this guy ruined your new shirt, he called you stupid, no one should ever call you stupid because you're the smartest person ever ok," she told me and as I looked into her eyes I saw that soft caring side again, I could tell she really meant it.
"Please, can we go?" I asked her as gentle as possible. I clutched her hand a little tighter and I felt her relax, that made my heart all bubbly inside.
"Fine," she said walking away.
"Weak!" The guy called after her but Santana held up her hand and quickly flipped him off, I couldn't help but laugh at that. That's when I realized we were still holding hands, my heart became all fluttery again and I smiled bigger then I ever thought I could before, her skin felt so soft on mine and our fingers fit together perfectly, it was one of those magic moments.
"Come over here," Santana said to me bringing me to a park bench that was off the trail by a pond. Over on the other side of the pond there were some musicians playing some jazz. There music was so relaxing, if I was dating Santana I would say this was the perfect date, minus the fact that ice cream was dripping down my back.
She sat me down on the bench and then began to ruffle through her bag, I wondered what she was looking for. Maybe her lip gloss or something, I really didn't mind though, the way her hair fell off her shoulders as she searched looked so sexy.
To my realization I saw that Santana had pulled a few tissues out of her bag, she motioned for me to turn around and then I got it. She was cleaning the ice cream off of my shirt. She was so caring and concerned, normally the people I've dated in the past would just tell me to such it up or clean it up myself but Santana actually took the time to help me out. I'm glad I wasn't facing her because if she saw how big my smile was now that would be embarrassing.
"He really got you good," Santana told me, I could feel the stickiness of the ice cream on me.
"Yeah," I sighed.
I felt her fingers graze over my skin as she was trying to get the ice cream off my back and shirt. She was being so gentle but I couldn't help but feel hot each time her fingers touched me. I wish we could stay like this forever. I heard the music going on around us, everything in this moment felt so perfect.
"I don't think I can get it all off, I'm sorry," she told me.
"That's okay, I was going to change anyways once I got home," I told her.
"No you weren't," she told me very bluntly as she whispered in near my ear. Her voice sent shivers over my body, she was so close.
"Yeah you're right, I really like this top."
"I'll buy you a new one," I was surprised no one had offered to buy me anything before.
"You don't have to do that," I told her. I didn't want her to waste her money on me, I'm sure she could buy other things with it and I'm really not that special, at least that's what I've been told all through high school.
"But I want too, there I think I've gotten most of it," she said as I turned around only to realize I was right in front of her face. She was so close to me, her lips were right in front of me. They looked so soft and perfect I just wanted to kiss her. I looked up at her eyes so see them sparkling.
My heart started beating so fast all I had to do was lean in a little bit and I would be kissing her. Everything seemed so right, the music, the park ,it would be a perfect moment, before I could think anymore I realized that she had leaned in the rest of the way and was kissing me. I felt my heart melt and once I realized what was going on and then I kissed her back.
It was so perfect, our lips fit together perfectly, it was like magic dancing inside of me, she tasted so good. I moved my hand up so I was holding her neck and my other hand was resting on her thigh. I instantly felt her hand graze up my back holding me tight. Her touch felt so good, it was like we had been kissing forever.
I decided to be bold so I grazed her bottom lip begging for entrance, and within seconds she granted me my wish. Our kisses slowly got deeper and deeper, I was trying so hard to control myself but the effect she had on me was so strong I knew that pretty soon I wouldn't be strong enough. She made my knee's weak and if I wasn't for the fact that we were sitting down I would have probably collapsed.
Slowly we pulled away even though I wished I could kiss her forever, too bad I needed air. I kept my eyes closed to saver the moment, I wanted this to be real I wanted to saver everything I felt, all the emotions that rushed through me. I wanted to save the effect she had on me. I opened my eyes and was met with her beautiful brown eyes looking back at me, she was smiling which warmed my heart completely.
We didn't say anything after that, I didn't want to say anything that could possibly ruin the moment. I always spoke my mind and I didn't was to screw this up. She then moved her head so she was lying on my lap she looked so cute lying on me. I moved my hand so it was resting on her back, genially moving my thumb so stroking her. We sat there for a few minutes just listening to the music and watching the ducks in the pond.
Just then I heard my phone go off ruining this perfect moment, it made me groan. I could hear Santana giggle, I would have never thought she'd giggle, once she heard my groan. I looked at the called ID to see that Tina was calling me. Oh great, she probably wanted to talk about the other night.
"Who is it?" Santana asked me.
"Tina," I could feel her tense, I knew she remembered that night just as well as I did. I didn't want any guy I just wanted Santana and now after the kiss I really hoped she wanted me too.
"Are you going to answer it?" I honestly didn't know what I was going to do so I just shrugged. "Do you want me to talk to her?"
"I do but then she'll just want to talk to me more, she didn't really like the idea that I was hanging out with you too much," I told her and I knew if Santana answered my phone than she would really hunt my down and tell me all the reasons why I shouldn't be friends with San.
"I think you should answer it, and tell you're busy," Santana said with a mischievous smirk.
"Maybe I will," I said as I pocked Santana's cheek, which only made her nuzzle further into me to hide her smile. It was the cutest thing I'd ever seen.
"Yes?" I said as I answered my phone.
"Britt! Hey, I didn't think you would pick up," she told me.
"Well I did so can you make this fast because I'm busy at the moment," I didn't want to sound mean but I was still mad at her and I normally forgive people really easily so if I talk to them less the longer I can stay mad.
"I wanted to talk to you about the other night, with Santana. You're not still hanging out with her are you because you know what she did to you or did you go through some memory loss," I couldn't believe the things she was saying to me, I though she was going to apologize but this was really mean. Every time I talked to her I felt like crap, I really don't know why I'm friends with her, but yet I am.
"Is that why you called me," I tried to sound really annoyed.
"No, I know you're not hanging out with that bitch don't worry, I called to say that I found you another guy, his names Ben. What do you think?"
"No," I said and then hung up the phone. I was pretty proud of myself, I never had the courage to do that before but if I had to hear another thing about the perfect guy she found me to date I think I'd explode plus I already found my perfect girl.
"What did she want this time?" Santana asked me looking concerned. To see her all caring made my heart warm up, I never though that Santana would ever be worried about me. If someone told me when I was in high school that Santana Lopez would want to be my friend and even kiss me I wouldn't have believed them.
"She told me she had a guy she wanted to set me up with," Santana's face turned to worry.
"Oh, are you going to?" She was quietly.
"No, I already found someone I really like," I told her but she still looked sad and broken, that really confused me.
"That's good," She quickly looked at her phone and then looked back at me as if she was about to cry. "I have to go Quinn has an emergency," she said as she quickly started to walk off. Then it clicked. I raced after her and grabbed onto her arm before she could walk away from me anymore.
I pressed my lips up against her's, hard and kissed her with everything I could. I wanted to show her how much I cared for her and just her. I felt her kissing me back. I felt so happy when I was with her, like us together could bring happiness to everyone.
"San, I really like you," I told her honestly. That was the first time I've actually been open about my feelings to anyone and it felt good. It took a lot of effort to get that out and I was shaking but when I saw her smile again it made everything seem worth it.
"I like you too," she told me with the biggest smile on her face, I couldn't help but smile when she said that too me.
"I have to tell you something," I was nervous. "When you kissed me before, at the reunion, I really liked you then too but I was really scared, I'm still really scared because I, being back there brought back a lot of bad memories."
She was listening to me really attentively. I never had someone listen to me and be that interested in my life before, it felt good but at the same time I was really scared because no one really knew this story.
"After you left everyone continued to call me stupid and say that I was a worthless loser and stuff, finally it stopped but I didn't realize why it stopped. I dated this guy Artie for some time, I really liked him and I thought he really liked me but it turns out he only was dating me to take my virginity and helping the guys find out everything in my life so they could later use it against me to show me how much of a loser I really am," I reached up to scratch my face when I realized my cheeks were wet. I didn't realize I had started crying.
"Britt, I want you to know I would never do that to you okay," she looked so concerned for me. I wanted to believe, but I am still a little scared. I nodded my head trying to believe it.
Santana then wrapped her arms around me into a big hug. I nuzzled my face into her neck feeling the tears running down my face. She held onto me so tightly, just being in her arms already made me feel better and safe. When she held onto me it made me feel like everything would be alright.
"You're not a loser okay. You never were. You're the smartest, kind, funny more beautiful girl I've ever met. You are amazing, and don't you dare let anyone tell you otherwise," her words made me smile.
"Thank you," I told her, still in her arms, she then kissed my head making my stomach flutter. "You want to go back? Watch a movie or something?"
"That sounds like a great idea, but Quinn actually does have an emergency," Santana told me with a little laugh. "Puck finally decided to ask her out and well Quinn, she's having a little freak attack." I laughed at that.
"Go help your friend," I told her.
"You going to be okay?" She asked me, I was now that I know that we were moving forward in our relationship. I wanted to stay with Santana for the whole day but I didn't want to seem selfish.
"I'll be fine," I said as best as I could.
"You're lying," she told me.
"Am not," I kicked myself for saying that because that really didn't sound that convincing at all.
"I'll come to your room as soon as I'm done, and this time you better be home," she said as a joke, it made me smile inside.
"I will be, don't worry," I told her giving her a hug again. I felt like the luckiest person every, I could hug Santana whenever I wanted to. I wanted to kiss her but I was still a little unsure where we stood in that department.
I watched Santana leave, just when she was almost out of sight I saw her turn back to me and wave, just that little action made me fell all happy inside like I was walking on a cloud. I waved back at her and I could just make out her smile. It felt great to have this feeling.
BEEEP!
I heard my phone go off so I checked my messages and realized that it was from Santana.
Santana: I meant it, you really are special! See you soon maybe 40 mins :D xo
She could make me smile even if it was just a simple text. I then saw I had another text, it was from the person that I really didn't feel like talking too.
Tina: I know what you said but I'm sure you two will hit it off. Ben's coming to your room in 30, be there.
Great, now what was I going to do. Santana was going to be there in 40 and he was coming in 30, I had to go back to the room for Santana. This was really going to strain me.
Sorry that I haven't updated in a while. I've just had no inspiration to write due to some events that have taken place in my life but I'll try to be better at updating. I've also had writers block so yeah. But I hope you like this chapter! Let me know what you think.