**Author's Note**
Thank you to all of you still interested and reviewing my story. I know it has been a long break, so thank you for your patience. I have had a lot going on in my personal life, so was not able to focus on my story. It feels good to be working on it again, and I hope you enjoy this chapter :)
Much thanks to my editor, foxotr, who has done an amazing amount of work for me, and who has been such a great friend.
Chapter XIV: I Wish I Was the Moon
He felt her lips on his cheek and his heart started to irregularly beat faster. Is this a kiss? Should I kiss her back? He didn't have a clue as to what to do; but, he did know, without a question or doubt, that he wholeheartedly wanted to kiss her.
Before he could make up his mind what to do, she pulled away from him. With a shy smile, she wished him a good night. He watched as she walked into the house, and disappeared from his sight. When he regained his proper composure, he timidly yelled out goodnight to the balcony area, quickly turned around, and marched back home. When he reached his house, his stomach was still in knots, and his heart was still beating irregularly.
He made his way to the garden and tried to do his normal routine. Such a familiar thing; a routine. Especially for him; he had spent far more years doing the same monotonous tasks than anyone else in existence. He wasn't able to focus on his work at all; several times he found himself staring off into space, with a smile permanently attached to his features. He would have thought the doorway they discovered into the strange land would have been more of a distraction, but it wasn't. He barely thought of that. It didn't excite him as much as thinking of her.
He had felt something similar to this before. Love. At least he had thought that's what it was. He had thought just looking at her, and listening to her, that he loved her. He was wrong. What he felt for her now was so much more than what he had previously. After meeting, talking with, and getting to know her; he knew he was in love. He wondered if it was wrong to love her so much, when she didn't even like him that way. He could tell that she at least liked him enough to be his friend. Even that was an amazing thing.
She even wanted to try and understand him more. That's why she was asking all those questions about journals written about him. He must be such an alien thing to her. He had to stop himself from thinking of what her opinion of him was; such thoughts just depressed him. And he didn't want to be depressed. He wanted to enjoy the feelings stirring in his heart. The enrapture she caused.
Distractedly, he walked to a new section of the garden. He had spent so many years thinking of his first love, Kim. Now the flame he had carried for her was just a dull flicker in his memory. Their brief encounter and experience was so long ago. It showed him that he was capable of having these types of emotions, and it did help him feel more connected to humanity. Incredible that he could feel love and desire for someone. And someone other than Kim. Vee was all he could think about.
He proceeded to think of her all through the night, and the early lit hours. He forced himself to sleep when the sun was high. When he slept he even dreamed of her. He woke up, and thought of her some more as he got out of bed and followed the long stairway down, pausing at his favorite window to glimpse her house.
Wandering into the kitchen, he noticed the brown bag she left the night before. It was resting on the table; he had made sure to bring it inside out of the night dampness. Carefully he picked it up and admired it like it was the nicest gift ever given to him. Piercing a couple blades through the middle of the bag, he tore it open, and revealed the pastry. Bending over and leaning his body over the table, he sniffed it. It smelled wonderful. He poked a blade through it, lifted it to his scarred lips, and merrily ate every last crumb. The last few requiring him to lick off the table. He didn't care; it was that good.
Edward tried to keep himself busy, but by the time the sun had fully set, he couldn't stand it any longer, and had to see her again. She did tell him he could visit her whenever he wanted to. He wanted to see her now. He couldn't wait for days until she showed up.
The decision was final; he walked to her house, hoping she would be there. As he approached her property, he saw the flash of lights from her car, and watched as she parked it and got out. Emerging from the darkness, he walked toward her, his smile growing, making it apparent just how happy he was to see her.
She looked up at him, and exclaimed, "Edward!" Her newly found smile matched his. Comments bubbled out of her, "Hi! I've been thinking of you all day. I'm so glad you came! Would you like to come inside?"
His smile got even bigger as he responded, "Very much."
He followed her to the door, which she unlocked. She walked through the door, and held it open for him. Throwing her bag and keys on a stand near the door, she continued to walk into the house, with him following close behind. His eyes fervently surveyed his surroundings.
She took off her jacket, and then rubbed her arms. "The nights are getting so cold; I think I'll start a fire." She walked into the living room, and yelled over her shoulder, "Make yourself at home."
He knew exactly what he wanted to do. He purposefully walked to a hanging picture on the wall. It was a beautifully haunting scene of a crumbling old building. A tree could be seen emerging from the middle of the rubble, the old foundations framing it. He immersed himself in the picture, he didn't know why, but the scene of the little tree growing through the middle of this ghost of a house made him feel hopeful. Most of the pictures where similar, some were black and white, some color. Losing all track of time, he methodically made his way to each one. Unaware of anything else going on around him; until Vee pulled him out of his reverie. "W-what?" He stumbled, not sure what she had said.
She laughed, "I asked you if you would like some tea." She held the cup up in front of him.
"Oh, yes. Thank you." He awkwardly tried to take it from her, being careful not to cut her. He smiled in satisfaction when he was able to get a blade through the handle and gently take it away from her.
She motioned to the pictures, and asked, "Do you like them?"
Without hesitation he stated, "I love them."
She motioned towards the living room by nodding her head in that direction. "I have a fire going if you would like to sit and enjoy it with me." He smiled and nodded, following her to the living room. "I really love to take photographs and to paint. I find it to be very stress relieving and therapeutic."
On his way to the couch he paused a moment looking at her cello case. He would love to hear her sing and play again, but he wasn't sure how to ask her.
She noticed his gaze and said, "I also really enjoy playing the cello. Would you like me to play something?"
He smiled happily, and replied, "Yes, please."
She grabbed the cello as he took a seat, and sitting across from him, started to tune it. After it was tuned she played a classical song that was kind of moody and just a pretty, melancholy song.
After it was finished he said. "Thank you." He paused a moment and asked, "Can you play one that requires voice accompaniment?"
She instantly turned red, and fumbled a bit with the cello, saying, "I kinda have a fear of singing in front of people."
He contemplated that for a moment, trying to think of something to say to quell her fear; he very much wanted to hear her sing. "Well," he slowly said, "I am not a real person, so you shouldn't be afraid."
She looked at him with surprise. "Edward," she solemnly said, "You are the most real person I have ever met."
He could feel his eyes getting misty; he was so touched by her declaration. And he did feel like an actual human being when he was with her. She made him feel so many emotions that he never knew he was even capable of feeling. He couldn't even speak, he just looked at her and smiled.
She returned his smile and said, "I can try to sing one...but, I may need to close my eyes."
She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and started to play 'I Wish I Was the Moon' by Neko Case. She must have felt comfortable with him, because not too long into it her eyes opened. She looked far off into the distance as she immersed herself into the song. She sounded and looked beautiful. He intently watched her for the duration of the song. When the song ended, he wasn't sure how to articulate what he felt about it into words.
"It was...beautiful," he said, stumbling over his words a little. "I have felt like that a lot of times before. Numb; but I don't when I'm with you." He looked at her and bashfully smiled. It was hard for him to speak his emotions, and usually difficult for him to talk much at all.
She returned his smile, and said, "I know what you mean." She paused and looked at the crackling fire. "I should put this away so we can enjoy the fire together."
She got up and put the cello back in it's case. After she put it away, she joined him on the couch, and they both gazed at the fire together. Almost instantly they were joined by a furry companion. He curled up on Vee's lap, deciding that sleeping was better than fire viewing.
"This is really nice," she said, snuggling into him. She yawned, her eyelids half closing.
He watched her as she got comfortable next to him. He hoped that she couldn't hear the crazy hammering of his heart. This was nice. It was more than nice. He definitely could get used to having her lay up against him like this. She was still dreamily gazing at the fire as he pulled his eyes from her to join her view. The flames illuminated the room in a soft orange light and the warmth felt wonderful. Within a few minutes he could feel her breathing change, as she rested her head against his shoulder. When he looked at her, he saw her eyes were closed. Her chest rose and fell with her breathing. She was sleeping.
Edward stayed statuesque for hours, not daring to move a muscle for fear he would disturb her. He watched her sleep; it was much more enjoyable than looking at the fire, which wasn't a fire at all. It had turned into a pile of ashes. Even if it was still a fire, he would prefer to watch her.
She inaudibly mumbled something and stirred in her sleep. Shifting her body around, Poe tumbled off her lap and onto his as she lay on her side. Her head fell lower to his chest as she threw one arm around him. If he could freeze any more, he would. If he could stop the movement of his breathing, he would. He didn't want to lose this, her embrace...even if she was unaware of giving him a quasi hug. He held still and enjoyed it. Poe even got comfortable and fell back asleep on his lap. Edward actually felt like he was part of a little family, and it gave him such contentment.
Sadly, the sun had to come up, like it always does. Her eyelids fluttered open, she tilted her head to see his face directly, and smiled at him. She sat up, and bashfully said, "I fell asleep right on you, I'm sorry."
He couldn't help smiling at this amazing creature, and the absurdity of what she said. "There is no need to apologize."
She stretched a little and looked at the clock. She groaned, "I have to get ready for work."
He made a snipping sound as he twitched his blades, and reservedly said, "I should go." Poe being disturbed from his slumber, stretched, and leaped to the floor. He sauntered away, looking for breakfast.
"You can stay as long as you'd like." She smiled encouragingly at him.
He glanced worriedly out the window. "It is getting brighter, and I would prefer to spend time in your home when you are in it."
"Alright, that's fair. I really like being with you Edward." Her smile faltered a little, as she got more serious; "It's really nice to have a friend here. I hope we can spend a lot more time together."
Unbelievable. There she was making statements that made him like her even more. He completely agreed, "As do I."
She got up and walked him to the back door. Holding it open for him, she said, "Goodbye, I will see you soon."
Before he could reply she leaned in and gave him a hug. As she started to pull away from him, she purposefully planted a kiss on his cheek.
That was it. He couldn't even talk now. He stumbled out the door with a large grin on his face, nodded at her, and quickly walked home. The brightness of the sun that he was so unaccustomed to seeing didn't even bother him. He didn't even notice it.