A/N: Life, illness, business trip = delay after delay after delay. Forgive me.

Chapter Thirty Two: Nothing's broke and nothing's missing.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Castle looks at Martha's pale wan face and reaches out his hand to steady his mother at the elbow. In the overly bright light of the hospital corridor her hair looks truly flame-red and it washes all the color from her face, leaching her of life.

Gabor's surgery has gone as well as anyone could have expected, and Castle's father is still currently among the living - although his condition is listed as 'critical' and all the surgeon would say post-op was that if the CIA operative made it through the night, then they could be 'hopeful'. Castle will take that. Somehow, someway he already knows in his bones that Gabor will make it through this; the man is too strong and too damned stubborn to die on him now.

Besides, Castle owes him everything at this point. His life, Kate's life, and that kind of means Alexis' and Martha's too. Still, his mother has been through an ordeal and he isn't at all sure she's up for spending the night at anyone's bedside. Valez didn't exactly treat her gently and Castle himself is responsible for the fall that caused her to bang her head – it's a very mild concussion, but still . . .

Martha bites her lip in a gesture she seems to have picked up from Kate in his absence, and so the author waits her out, tries to assess in the momentary silence what the inscrutable look on her face is really all about. All he comes up with though is that the actress looks – nervous.

"I want to be there," she tells him softly and at length. "It's just, I haven't seen him since the night you were conceived Richard and so it's really not my place, I mean – it's been forty years."

Castle smiles widely and his mother's eyes widen in surprise.

"What?" she questions.

He squeezes her arm where he's already holding her by the elbow.

"It's your place, Mother," he says, his eyes alight and his expression tranquil, but with such surety behind it that Martha can't contain the slight gasp of surprise as she reads the wealth of knowledge apparent on her son's face.

"Really?" she asks. And there are a hundred questions contained in that single word.

Castle nods. "I know many things about my father now," he tells her. "Including exactly how he's always felt about you, and how precious his memories of that day are to him. I know he's held onto them tightly, relived them again and again, Mother."

"Oh," the actress replies, biting her lip again as tears float across her vivid blue eyes. She sways slightly in his steadying grasp, before she suddenly straightens her spine and Castle senses her exerting the full force of her formidable will as she stands taller and stronger.

"I loved him you know," she says, her voice quietly truthful. And Castle doesn't doubt it any longer, because even though his parents only knew each other a day – he's seen for himself how those feelings live in the both of them even now. All these years later, the mark that day left on the pair of them is still so clear.

It's remarkably comforting to him – a comfort he never knew he was missing before all this.

"He loved you too," he replies. "If you truly feel up to staying – there is no-one he'd rather see when he opens his eyes. Trust me on this."

Martha smiles, takes a deep breath and nods.

"I'm staying. I need too."

Castle turns to go.

"Richard-"

"Yeah?"

"You aren't going to vanish again right? Please tell me this is over now?"

The writer frowns.

"Almost," he replies.

"What does that mean exactly?"

Castle shrugs helplessly, but when he speaks he's vehement. "Mother, Gabor is CIA – he had an assignment and Valez has been under their protection. I don't know that Kate has enough yet to prosecute him for murder and make it stick, make it enough of a case that the CIA backs off. But even if she doesn't I'm back, I'm here now. I won't leave her, Alexis or you unprotected ever again."

Martha nods thoughtfully. "Your father, he didn't give you any choice in the matter the first time – did he?"

Castle shakes his head. "No," he admits. "None at all."

"And yet, you seem to have come to care for him," she says knowingly.

Her son smiles, "I came to understand his motives, all that was driving him. And to be honest, I found him just impossible to dislike. I'm his only child and he was as ardent in his desire to protect me as he was in his trying to fulfill his obligations to his job – more so – in the end. He's a good man, Mother."

Martha nods, "I'm glad then – that you've gotten to know him, and I'm sorry Richard – for keeping everything I knew about him to myself, even if it was precious little really."

Castle steps closer and plants a tender kiss on Martha's forehead.

"Don't be," he whispers into her hair. "I always had you, Mother. It was enough – believe me."

The actress gives him a watery smile and disappears into Gabor's intensive-care hospital room and Castle heads anxiously back to the waiting room to find Kate and the others.

Beckett's eyes have been glued to the corridor Castle and Martha disappeared down since the second he left. Every moment he's out of her sight is agony and when his tall, broad form reappears she feels like Atlas suddenly relieved of the weight of the world and she's out of her seat and on him in the span of a heartbeat.

Kate collides with him and Castle feels it too, relief, love, gratitude and an almost overwhelming desire to be alone with her and reconnect himself to her - physically.

The need and the heat that flares up so quickly has their eyes locking and the rest of the world just falling away.

Life interrupts as ever though, when Alexis arrives and Castle extricates himself with an apology on his face that Kate waves away. They've had a hard time getting hold of the writer's daughter since they arrived at the hospital hours before with Gabor – and the strain of not being able to share her father's return with her has worn on them all.

"Dad-"

Castle opens his arms and the young red-head slams into him even harder than Kate did moments earlier. He picks her up like he used to when she was little, cradles her against his strong chest and squeezes.

"Hi pumpkin," he breathes into her hair, squeezing harder as the college student starts to sob against him.

"Oh, Dad-"

"I know," Castle says soothingly. "Me too, baby bird. Its okay now, Alexis. It's all going to be okay now – I promise."

Her face buried against his neck, Castle still feels her smiling through her tears.

"I missed you so much," she whispers. "I missed you every day. Don't ever leave me again Dad, ever – please."

"Not ever," the writer agrees. "Not ever again, I swear."

Finally pulling back Alexis beams at him, and Castle sets her back on her dainty feet, brushing the tears from her face with his thumbs. His daughter nuzzles his hand, her eyes darting to a smiling Kate, and the writer rejoices as the two people he loves the most share a moment of joy between them.

Freeing a hand he reaches back for Kate's and as their fingers entwine tightly he takes a second to close his eyes and just - breathe.

He's home. Kate's safe and Alexis is safe and his mother is safe and Gabor made it through surgery.

As moments go – it would be hard to beat this one, so he stops and he takes another breath in it.

Before he has to open his eyes, and let it go.

The writer turns to the seated Ryan and Esposito.

"Is there any update on Valez?" he asks them.

Esposito stands, frowning.

"Unfortunately," he begins, "you didn't manage to kill him when you beat the bastard senseless. And I'm sorry about that Castle – might have been better all round if he'd done us all the favor of dying then."

Castle nods.

"Yeah I know. So what now?" he asks. "The CIA could come for him at any moment Espo – and with Gabor out of it right now, if they do and they take him into their custody . . . "the writer trails off.

"Then you and Kate remain in danger," Esposito finishes for him. "I know bro."

Castle turns his partner. "Do you have enough to make the case against him for Slaughter's murder stick?"

Beckett looks up at him and shakes her head.

"It's circumstantial at best. Lanie thinks she has something that might link him to the bullets that killed Slaughter. And we have a strong motive. But it's only enough for an arrest warrant at this point. I mean we've got him on abduction for your mother – no question, and what happened in the storage warehouse today strengthens our case – but if the Feds want him badly enough, would even an iron-clad case be enough to hold them off? Not to mention what a high-priced lawyer can do."

Castle nods. "Yes, it has to be. My father told me it would be enough for the CIA to back away from their operation if the NYPD's claim on Valez was tight enough. I don't pretend to know why exactly that is. But if we can nail Valez to the wall – this is over Kate. All we have to do is finish this case."

Ryan steps up to the group.

"Seems to me," he says, "That our best shot at it then is breaking Karpowski?"

Castle nods in agreement.

"She can gift-wrap Valez for us surely. She's done at the end of the day. Her NYPD career is over and she's going to jail for attempted murder at the very least. Plus conspiracy to commit murder, obstruction of justice-"

Beckett interrupts. "She has every reason not to help us though, Rick," she says. "She hates us, blames us for her sister's murder every bit as much as Valez does. What do you suggest we use as leverage?"

"Everything she's thrown away," Castle replies. "She was a good cop before this Kate, and she knows it. If we want to break her – there's your way."

"Leave it to us," Esposito says with determination.

Kate shakes her head, "Javi I-"

"Go home," he interrupts quickly. "Go be with each other Beckett, and let Ryan and I worry about this now."

"Yeah," Ryan says nodding. "We've got Karpowski, and Captain Gates has people from IA that she trusts implicitly sitting on Valez' hospital room. He's not going anywhere with anyone, you can be assured of that."

Castle looks to Kate and waits to see what she wants to do. He won't push, if she wants to go to the precinct and keep working this he'll go with her – as desperately as he wants to simply take a few hours at the very least and go home."

Beckett however is waiting on him. She looks up into his face with hesitancy. 'Castle?"

"The boys have this," he tells her. "Please Kate, I just want a few hours to be finally – home."

"Okay," she replies, relief sweeping across her pale cheeks, before she adds softly, "Are you certain you're okay leaving your father, Rick? I mean his condition isn't really stable yet?"

Her partner nods. "My mother is with him. And I have faith that he's going to be alright, Kate. He's strong – trust me."

Beckett nods. "I still can't quite believe what he did," she confesses in a rush of anxiety. "He moved so fast, but it was so calculated – I don't even understand how he knew she was about to shoot me, let alone why he would decide to sacrifice himself in such a way."

Castle looks serious in the wake of her declaration, guilt warring with admiration on his handsome face. "He did it for me," he tells her simply, "Because I would have done it – traded my life for yours, Kate."

The writer reaches out and cups his partner's cheek against his palm, holds her immobile with his gaze. "I would die for you Kate, and my father knows it. I would die without you – and he knows that too."

The brunette detective turns her face until she can kiss the writer's palm.

"He must love you almost as much as I do then," she whispers.

Castle manages a faint, reassuring smile.

"I honestly think he does," he admits. "I even believe now that he always has."

Beckett nods.

"Let's honor that and go home then, Castle. You, me and Alexis – let's go home."

Castle knees actually start to tremble a little when he exits the elevator in his apartment building and spies the door to the loft. Crazy. But he can't quite believe he's finally here – back home, and that the nightmare of the last five months is almost behind him.

He feels Kate crowding him at his back, and he smiles over at his daughter. Alexis hasn't stopped smiling since they left the hospital. Even though she pestered him with questions and demands that he put off for now. The details of exactly where he's been. The how's and the why's – there is time enough for that once the case is nailed down tight and the weight is finally lifted from his shoulders. But even through his evasions his daughter smiled, happy enough to just have her father restored to her – to be assured he wouldn't leave again.

At the door, butterflies erupt in his stomach and his palms grow damp, he looks helplessly at Kate who just nods at him with encouragement, before she wordlessly hands him a key.

The key sticks in the lock the way he remembers and Castle smiles inwardly, ridiculously pleased by such a stupid reminder of what's 'normal', and then the lock gives with that touch more pressure it's always needed. The door swings wide and he's just, speechless and ecstatic and as he crosses the threshold to his home and everything is so perfectly as he left it – the writer reaches out with both hands, yanks his girls into his arms and allows the silent tears of happiness to come.

Alexis joins them for coffee – another wonderful, 'normal' moment and then he sees his daughter silent assess both him and his partner before she puts aside her own needs and gifts to him what she can obviously see he needs most.

"I'll be in my old room," she says, kissing him on the cheek before she hugs him hard and long and tightly. "I'll stay the night and see you both in the morning Dad – it's been a long day and it's really late. I'm tired," she adds.

It's both the truth and a lie and he's so grateful for it – loves his selfless daughter so damn much.

"Thank you," he mouths silently at her, out of Kate's sight, before he says softly, "Goodnight kiddo – I love you."

Alexis nods.

"I love you too, Dad. Goodnight, Kate."

"See you in the morning Alexis," Beckett answers. "We won't head into the precinct or to the hospital until we've seen you," she promises.

Castle waits until he hears the soft snick of the door to Alexis' room and then he whirls, is off his stool at the kitchen counter so fast Kate blinks at him and then he's tugging her into his arms, lifting her against him, lowering his mouth over her single squeak of surprise.

He lifts her effortlessly and still kissing her with abandon he heads towards their bedroom, kicks the door closed with a resounding bang behind them and heads for their bed.

Kate's recovered enough to wrap her legs around his torso, pulling him down onto her as he lowers her body onto the firm matress surface. Limbs all tangled she tugs at his clothing, succeeds at ridding him of his form fitting black top as she manages to tug it over his head. Greedy her hands reach for his body and then he feels her pause, push against his chest. Looking down with confusion he sees her beautiful eyes widen, sees her mouth form a perfect 'O'.

"Castle-"

She says his name like it's a question, he can't quite fathom why.

"Kate, why you'd stop me?" he asks.

Kate shakes her head, her hands once more reaching for him and she runs her fingertips across his stomach, he closes his eyes for a split second as desire rips through him. Forces it down, opens his eyes again and waits for her to explain.

"Oh my God, Castle," she whispers in amazement. "Look at you-"

Has he really changed so very much? He's in better shape now certainly; a lot stronger physically than he was five months ago – and thinner maybe, but still.

"You were beautiful always Castle – but you're . . . "she stops suddenly mid sentence, looks up into his face, like she's afraid she'll offend him somehow if she says anything more.

"Buff," he jokes for her. "I'm buff now."

It has the desired effect and makes Kate breathe out this beautiful peel of laughter that echoes around him. Breathless, her hair a corona around her head as she stares up at him from flat on her back on their bed before him. It's everything and she's everything and he's where he's prayed every night he'd eventually be.

Castle lowers his mouth to hers again, igniting the flame that always hovers there waiting and then he exults as the resultant conflagration consumes him.