Hello again. I'm so bad at updating. So sorry! I don't even have any excuses this time. The good news is, this is the longest chapter yet! So I hope you enjoy it!

Note: I do not own Glee, it's affiliates, or any characters you may recognize.

Dear Nobody,

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. God, I'm confused. At least one question was answered. I like guys, like the way girls should like guys. I think I still like girls too though. I think I'm okay with that, at least for now. The real problem I have right now is that I wish I could talk to you. I wish I could tell you how I felt. I think I might be falling for you but I'm not sure. But I'm not your type. I know that. I don't know what to do.

Jeff put the cap on his pen and closed the red journal. He then made is way to his desk where he tucked the journal safely back in its place at the bottom of the drawer. Jeff laid his head in his hands.

"What's happening to me?" Jeff wondered out loud.

At that moment, Nick stepped through the door to their shared dorm room.

"Ah, you're finally up!" Nick said cheerfully. "Good thing too. Class starts in 15 minutes!"

"I know." Jeff said.

"Hey where did you go last night? You were already asleep when I got back from hanging out with David."

"Last minute chemistry study session with Sebastian. We have a test today."

"Good luck man. Here!" Nick pulled a wrapped up bagel from inside his blazer pocket. "I got you something for breakfast."

"Thanks." Jeff said forcing a smile.

Nick left the room to go comb his hair one last time or something and Jeff dropped the bagel in the trash. He was collecting his books when Nick reappeared.

"Ready to go?" Nick asked.

Jeff nodded.

The two boys made their way through the crowded hallways of Dalton. When they reached the grand marble staircase, Nick said good bye and made his way to the second floor for his math class while Jeff continued on towards the science hall. Fortunately for him, there was actually a chemistry test today so his meetings with Sebastian where easily covered up, although, he wasn't sure how long that was going to last. Chemistry was going to become obvious pretty soon. Literally and figuratively. He'd have to think of another excuse. Also fortunately for him, Jeff was good at chemistry and didn't need to study. It's not like he would have had time to anyway.

The morning went by fast. Lunch came and lunch went and Jeff had his classes in the afternoon. It was now after school and the Warblers were beginning to gather in the choir room for this afternoon's rehearsal.

Nick and Jeff took their usual spots on the couch and Jeff suddenly found his shoes very interesting as Sebastian made his way past them to his spot at the council table.

"Hey. Are you okay? You've been acting kind of strange all day." Nick said softly to Jeff.

"Yeah I'm fine." Jeff said look up at Nick's face with a smile. "I've just had a lot on my mind lately."

"How'd your test go?"

"Fine."

"Are you sure everything is okay?"

"Yes, I promise." Jeff tried to smile again.

"Okay…but if you want to talk about whatever is on your mind, you know where to find me."

"Thanks Nick. I appreciate it."

Jeff was relieved when David finally called the meeting to order. He didn't want Nick to see any farther into him right now.

Jeff chanced a glance up to the council table and met eyes with Sebastian, the latter giving a wink. Jeff felt himself blush and he immediately regretted making the decision to look anywhere near that table.

As David droned on, Jeff became lost in his thoughts. The truth was, Jeff was tired of having questions about everything all the time but he knew there were some questions that just could not be answered right now. Jeff liked kissing Sebastian but he wasn't sure if it was because Sebastian is a guy or because it's Sebastian. Like, did he just like kissing Sebastian because a lot of people would probably give anything to do so and he picked him or because he actually felt something for Sebastian or guys in general. He knew the only way to test this was kiss someone else and see what that felt like. Well let's see, Kurt and Blaine are gay, but they're dating so that won't work. Then there's Nick. Well shit. That's definitely not going to work either. Ugh now what? Well asking Nick a few questions couldn't hurt right? He just had to be extra careful not to give himself away.

Jeff decided he'd better start to pay attention now and fortunately for him, no one seemed to notice him drifting off. Except for Sebastian that is and also fortunately for him, no one seemed to notice that either. Jeff gave Sebastian a tiny little smile and then went back to looking elsewhere.

"So as you may know, sectionals are coming up and as always you are free to submit your song suggestions to the box on the wall by the door." David said motioning in that direction.

"The council will then go through the suggestions and, with their own ideas, pick the songs and the soloists. You are free to perform in front of the group as many times as you would like before that point should you want to be considered for a solo. Council members are allowed to audition as well. Any questions?"

No one raised their hand and David took that as a sign to dismiss for the night. The Warblers quickly filed out of the choir room. Nick, Jeff, and David headed towards their rooms together. They talked about video games or something. Jeff didn't really remember. They parted ways and Nick and Jeff stepped into their room. Both boys plopped down on their desks.

Time passed. They were both in sweats and on their computers while simultaneously trying to do homework. They had small conversations and a few laughs just like normal. Jeff picked up his English book and made himself comfortable on top of his bed. Nick, seeing that it was a good idea, followed suit on his bed.

"What chapter are you on?" Nick asked.

"Uh, one?" Jeff laughed.

"Man, you better get going. At least I'm on chapter two." Nick said with a giggle.

"Oh shut up."

The laughter died down and the two Warblers began plugging away at their books. But as usual, Jeff's mind wasn't in it. He was thinking about what exactly to ask Nick and working up the courage to do so. With his eyes still on his book, Jeff opened up his mouth to speak.

"Um Nick? Could I ask you something kind of personal?"

"Uh yeah, sure." Nick said turning to face Jeff.

"I guess I was just wondering how you knew you were gay. I mean, you've never really told me before."

"Well it was kind of a long process. It didn't happen overnight."

Nick put his book down and rolled over so he was giving Jeff his full attention.

"I think I knew it all along but I didn't want to admit it to myself. In middle school, most of the guys our age started getting in to girls but I didn't really see the appeal. At the time I thought maybe I was just still in the 'girls have cooties' phase. But when I started high school and it still hadn't gone away, I thought maybe that wasn't the reason. My immediate thoughts were that something was wrong with me. Looking back, I wonder why I ever thought that. Anyway, there was this little crush that I had that I had been suppressing for a long time. It was then that I realized that's why I didn't like girls the way I was supposed to."

"But how did you know from that that you were gay? How did you know that it wasn't just that one guy?" Jeff asked.

"I'm getting to that. Just about a year ago, it became evident that that person had feelings for someone else. The things that I felt were horrible. I had lost my chance and it hurt so bad. No one else knew that I was gay yet, although they probably had their assumptions. I had to pretend that nothing was going on so that I could come to terms with it on my own before I let the world in. At least I had fallen for someone who was gay. Unfortunately that was an accomplishment for someone else as well. A few months later those boys, one of which was just a friend again and the other who had become a friend, formed a relationship and I've been extremely supportive of it ever since. They helped me to come out and you know the rest. I'm so sorry I never told you any of that before. I think I thought that I didn't need to explain myself to you because I figured you knew all along. Am I right?"

"I had my assumptions yes and I was so proud of you for coming out because I knew you were truly happy. That's probably why I never asked about it until now. But now that I know, I wish I would have known then so I've could have helped you through the hard times."

Nick smiled.

"You did Jeff. You were my friend through it all. You never asked questions and you never judged me. That's exactly what I wanted my best friend to do. Thank you."

"You're welcome Nicky."

Now it was Jeff's turn to smile.

"Shit Jeff! It's almost midnight! I'm going to hop in the shower."

"Alright, I'm going to see how far I can get in this damn book while you're gone."

But once Nick had shut himself in the bathroom, Jeff forgot about reading and pulled out the red notebook again.

Dear Nobody,

I know what I have to do but I just can't do it. The thought of being with you feels so right but I'm scared of what might happen. I was there for support last spring and so was everyone else. It could be the same for me and I know it but I'm not ready. I'm not ready to face the rejection from my first crush like that. I need your help. What do I do?

Thank you so much for reading this story! Reviews and such are more than welcome but definitely not expected. Hope to see you next chapter!