A/N I know, long long long long wait for this one. I just hope it doesn't disappoint. This chapter has kicked my arse six ways from Sunday, but here it is, finally finished and may all shiny and wonderful by the awesomeness that is Mynxi. Love you hard, Treacle, you helped get my arse in gear for this one!

E~D~W~A~R~D

How could I be so stupid?

I had brought Bella here with the sole intention of getting her to talk about her dream, the nightmare that had been plaguing her for the last two weeks. Every night I had watched as she began to murmur in her sleep, nothing concrete left her lips as she began to breathe heavily and then writhe beneath her covers. Her face took on an expression of sexual anticipation and I would put everything into trying to delve into her mind in order to unlock the secrets within. Her breath would become fast and laboured, deep and needy, her legs rubbing against one another and her tongue wetting and tasting her own lips as the dream continued. The first time it had been enticing, watching her in such rapture, smelling her arousal and fighting my own instincts to wake her and take her as she so obviously needed to be taken. But then the nightmare showed its true form and she would stiffen, and then let go one of the most awful screams I had ever been privy to. And I had been privy to many, been the cause of most of them.

It was terrifying, seeing Bella in such chaos, locked within her nightmare. It always took time to wake her, to drag her from her terror, and to wrap her safely in my arms in some effort to bring her peace. The first time it happened, it was easy to brush it off as a simple nightmare. But then it happened again, and again, eventually becoming a plague upon her every night. I had thought the cause obvious, that she was dreaming of me as she often did, acting out her desires within the safety of her dreams until my true nature became apparent and then the screaming would start.

I watched her wither before my eyes, my venom heighten sight able to see more clearly the changes in her. The darkening shadows beneath her eyes, her already slight frame becoming thinner as the days went on; her loss of appetite and the slow but sure destruction of her ability to concentrate. It was frightening to be sure, seeing the one that you love falling in on themselves before your very eyes. Bella being human was a difficulty, there was no denying that. Her being my singer had meant that I had almost lost a part of myself the first moment I met her. That first meeting had been the hardest hour of my life, being that close to the most delicious and almost undeniable scent, knowing that all I had to do was give her some pretty words and she would follow me anywhere, that my teeth would have sliced so cleanly through her skin, unlocking the warmth that my body was screaming to consume.

By some grace I had managed to abstain and come to know the human, recognise her as a part of myself, as my mate. As one of my mates. Even then I had tried to stay away, mating with a human may not be frowned upon within our world but it was still unusual and the way her blood sings to me made it all the more daunting. Then there was my past, something that I could not erase, something that a part of me did not want to erase, but still something that the innocence of Bella Swan should not be exposed to. Or at least that was what I had thought at first. Before I realised how strong she was, how steadfast her character was and how mature she was for her age. And, of course, she recognised me as a part of herself, even if she was not privy to the knowledge of what exactly that meant.

And life had become sweet, for the first time since...him, I had felt something, my emotions changing from their stagnant state into love and need and desire. Time spent together proved positive for my control and we became closer, both emotionally and physically. And yet, I was still nervous to take that step, scared that during the act I would lose control and harm her...or worse. But Bella's unwavering confidence in me meant that she didn't fully understand the danger that I presented, and she didn't know the whole story. While my words about my virginity were almost true, in terms of female coupling at least, my sexual history was one of blood and death and no place between myself and Bella. Or, at least, that is how it should be. I kept that from her out of fear. How would a human understand such depravity? She was my salvation from my past, even if it seemed to now be catching up to me. To us.

The reveal of her nightmare clearly stated something different, something about Bella's inner yearnings. Something that I would rather not dwell on, but was also becoming an increasing concern. Worse yet, it was becoming more and more of a temptation. Just the thought of the three of us together. I quelled that thought quickly; it would do no one any good to dwell on such things.

The night had started off well, having Bella all to myself was something that I craved every minute of the day, having her in my arms was pure contentment itself. I had consulted with Alice beforehand, but all she would give me was that it needed to be done. The flashing images of Bella's further deterioration was all I needed to know that this was the course I had to take. When Bella had pulled away from me, I had thought my fears were confirmed, her reluctance to consummate our relationship an obvious indicator of the subject of her nightmare. But then Bella had started talking, her halted explanation and description of her nightmare had me feeling as though the past, my past, had come crashing into me.

Flashback

The night was almost black as pitch as I stood hidden in the very rear of what was to be my first human victim's back yard. Within me, guilt was warring with the bloodlust and the need for vengeance. But one thing was certain; Charles Evanson deserved to die. The dreams of the surrounding humans were a hazy background noise within my mind, my concentration solely on the bastard that had caused Esme so much pain in her human life. Seeing through his eyes, he was sitting in his unkept kitchen, drowning in a cheap bottle of whiskey and reminiscing about the whore that he had just let out of his house and sent on her way. He was congratulating himself on the amount of bruises that he had been able to leave behind during the quick coupling that they had engaged in, coming to the conclusion that it was easier to pay for someone to submit to him than train another wife. Apparently, having one so weak to throw herself from a cliff had been enough trouble.

His thoughts drove my hatred, fuelling my bloodlust. My eyes were black and my throat burned, but I was desperate for this not to be a quick kill. I was determined to make sure that Charles Evanson saw his death coming, felt its claw at his skin, and his soul as his life was slowly drained from him, and he would know that it was for Esme that death had come for him.

Sick, demented, bastard.

I entered through the backdoor, my movements silent and stealthy, he noticed neither my entrance, nor my presence behind him as my top lip curved into a silent snarl. I stalked towards him, my hand mere millimetres from the back of his neck when it was brought to my attention that I had a spectator.

'Golden eyes. His eyes might be black now, but they were definitely gold before. An Atypical about to fall from grace'

'Atypical', the name given to those of us that follow the animal diet. His thoughts were amused, but intrigued, pleasured even. He was enjoying watching me, and I found that I was enjoying his attentions.

'About to slip...but not out of control, he's choosing this. Revenge...hatred...anger. This was planned, a purposeful fall for this angel.'

'Angel', I stilled as his thoughts went over my form. He liked what he saw, very much so in fact. His attraction to me was very much evident and I smirked to myself, my lips lifting in a lopsided smile even as I surprised myself at my own reactions. I was getting hard. Not all that unusual for a seventeen year old, human or otherwise, but still, I had never felt such...heat for a man before. For anyone in fact. Something that I definitely needed to ponder, but now was not the time. Now I had a meal to consume and a man to torture.

'He hesitates...why? Ohh...he's all sorts of aroused, mmm, I have to meet him. Go on, angel, fall from grace, let me watch your descent'

I licked my lips, striding forward without forethought, grabbing Charles Evanson by the scruff of his dirty neck and throwing him into the corner, finding more amusement than I had expected hearing his bones crack and the sluggish smack of his blood as it impacted against his skin. Nothing shed yet though, no I was very careful not to allow him to bleed. Not yet. That candy flowing through his veins was for me and me alone. Not one drop to be wasted.

I watched as his lifted his head, eyes wide and all blood shot white in his terror. The drab brown of his eyes almost taken out by his pupils as they dilated in the human's pathetic attempt to take everything in. A survival instinct. Not that anything could help him now. His thoughts were gibberish, fevered, and terrified. Beautiful really, confused and screaming out for explanations and escape. My smirk widens, darkens. There will be no escape.

"P-please," he whimpered.

Begging. Not unexpected. Pathetic, cowardly bastard of a man. He never listened when Esme begged for him to stop.

"Please? Please what? Please stop? Please do not hurt me? Do not kill me?" I growled, sneering at the poor excuse for life cowering before me. "Did you stop when Esme begged you? Did you take pity and try to mend your ways? Or did you grin and carry on. Hiding behind wrongly placed blame and sick anger?"

His eyes widened even further, if that were possible.

'Good boy, he has him almost where he wants him. Keep him that frightened for a little while longer and his blood will be all the sweeter.'

My friend was still enjoying the show, it seemed, he was captivated and thinking about the emotions? Empath. Interesting. I saw him through my mind then, he was perched on a tree, watching us through the window. And, my god, he was stroking himself through his trousers. Damn it, I was getting distracted.

Stalking forward, I laughed in the bastards face as he cowered behind his hands and screaming pleas for mercy. But it was his desperate denial of his abused against Esme that had me roaring into his face and crushing his spine. I was lucky that I did not kill him outright then, if not for a curious feeling of calm that overcame me, I would have ripped the shit in half. The stranger, my spectator, it seems can do more than simply sense emotions. Again, most interesting and something that I was very grateful for at that moment.

He had his cock out now, stroking it slowly, making himself stroke slowly. He was desperate for release, but not until the final moment, not until the final breath. I knew exactly how he felt.

'Lay him on the table, lay him down and let him see you...let him see your teeth, angel.'

I did exactly what he said, enjoying my stranger's surprise and the new ideas running through his head. Charles' legs flopped uselessly off the end as I did so, his garbled screams music to my ears as I leaned over him and smiled wide, showing him my all too perfect teeth; white and sharp and screaming of death.

He was calling me Devil in his mind.

"Oh no, Charles Evanson, I am not the Devil. Although you will be seeing him soon enough."

End Flashback.

The rest of that evening had been like Bella's; a dark seduction and an introduction to the pleasures of the kill and the other hungers that it could sate. Jasper. He had watched me, even talked me through some of the torture. It had not taken him long to realise my gift, or to use it to both of our advantages, and he had reached his own completion as I drained the last of Charles Evanson's blood from his veins. I had left the house, leaving the drained and mangled corpse on the kitchen table, setting fire to the house and hiding my nights work. It was so much easier to cover kills up back then.

That night I lost my virginity to a man. To Jasper. My mate. Shit. Bella and I's mate. Our trio.

Bella had turned around, and her face was nothing short of horrified. And I just stood there staring at her, because even though I had known the family was on their way back, even though I had heard their thoughts. It just hadn't registered properly in my mind, not in time to warn her. I would be lying if I said I didn't want them to hear it too, but I had never meant for it to come out quite like this. I was too caught up in the past and what seemed to be coming for me...for us again. Not that that is any excuse for this.

Bella.

"Be-" I broke the silence, Alice's mind filling mine with a multitude of visions, a kaleidoscope of possible decisions and outcomes, moving so fast it was difficult to decipher which was born out of what decision. Most of them seemingly stemming from Bella, who was, at this moment, turning a very alarming shade of purple.

"You bastard."

I tried to talk to her, but I couldn't come up with any forgiveness for myself or my actions, let alone expect them from Bella.

She looked so...tired. And so...broken.

I pleaded. I could not think of anything else to say or do.

It didn't work.

She ran away from me.

I didn't look back at the family, I didn't need to. Carlisle was running through the possibilities in his mind, his arm firmly around Esme's waist who was wondering if she should rip my head off on Bella's behalf. I wouldn't struggle if she did. Alice had 'I told you so' on repeat, and she had; told me so, that is. Told me that Bella would tell me, but that the outcome wouldn't be exactly what I was imagining. And yes, in my mind it went a little like this, Bella forgives me and understands my motives. As unrealistic as that seems now, it is easy to recognise irrationality with hindsight. Unfortunately, even with hindsight being 20/20, it is impossible to take something back. No matter how damaging it might be.

Rosalie was her usual stone self, a bitch of the worst sort. Calm and collected. Apparently, I should just leave Bella to it. It was Emmett's thoughts that I shouldn't leave her to think she's completely on her own, that made me move, putting one foot in front of the other until I was watching Bella pack her things into her backpack.

"Bella, please let me explain."

She didn't turn towards me, just froze long enough to let out a stuttered sigh, before getting back to her task.

"Explain what, Edward? That you manipulated me into telling you something so damn private and so personally horrifying, only to make sure that your family heard it too? That there is no way this could be a mistake because you would know from 5 miles out that they were on their way back." I snorted. "Hell, if they ever even left at all."

I wanted to tell her all about Jasper, what her dream likely meant. I wanted to tell her that I love her, that I would do anything for her...that I was terrified she had been dreaming of me killing her. Just the thought that she might be that scared of me set me off into irrationality.

Instead...

"We were worried about you, Bella. We are worried, and you wouldn't talk to anyone about it. I know that this was underhanded and-" I cut myself off as she spun to face me, nothing less that fury that was like a slap in the face.

"I spoke to you. I told YOU! And you must have known that I would, otherwise there would be no point in having everyone come back! Are you happy now? Happy now that you know the depths of the debauchery within my subconscious? That you know exactly why I haven't said anything before now? Why I couldn't?"

Her voice broke and I couldn't stop myself, blurring forward and wrapping my arms around her, holding her to me. I felt so wretched for doing this to her, even worse for taking my own comfort with her in my arms. It has been decades of self-discipline and denial to get me to this point. To get what Alice had promised me all those years ago. I love Bella beyond comprehension.

"I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry. I was so worried about you, you have barely been sleeping, and Alice had seen that it would only get worse," I rambled on until I felt her stiffen, kicking myself when I realised what I had said that brought back her ire.

'You should really learn to listen to me, Edward,' Alice thought from downstairs.

She pulled away and I let her. I didn't disguise my fear or my foot in my mouth as she glared at me.

"She did, did she? Well, then, that's alright then. Makes everything better. So, that means that she saw me tell you. Why the hell did you just keep it between us? You know what, never mind. That seriously doesn't matter. What matters now is this...what does Alice's visions tell her now? Hmm?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose as Bella walking out of the house played through my mind thanks to Alice's vision that she practically forced into my head.

Bella walked out of the room.

I stood there, not moving, frozen completely. Just staring at the spot that Bella had been in just seconds before. I didn't breathe, didn't blink. Just stared.

I could hear them talking about me from where they had stayed in the kitchen, granting Bella some privacy and dignity as she left.

"I told him that he should have waited to tell us, and I told you-" There was a smack, followed by a few choice curse words from Emmett "-not to just barge right in there!" Alice spoke to Emmett in her usual bipolar fashion.

"Hey! I thought that someone was going into Bella's room at night. It wasn't what Edward had got his panties in a twist over, she's jonesing for someone else. No wonder he's sulking up in his room, I would too after hearing all of that. And Bella...man, could she have gotten any redder? You reckon she'd let herself get that red if she realised how much more appetising it makes her? I've never seen her so pissed before; I thought for sure that she was going to torch his ass. And what was going on with Edward anyway? Why the hell didn't he tell us all to keep our noses out instead of you all following me in and then standing there like a bunch of surprised puppies?"

Emmett had them all running similar questions through their heads, all expect Alice. She was the only one who knew the truth of the decade I had spent away from the family. Carlisle had his doubts, his theories and his worries. But he had never questioned me when I turned back up on the doorstep with Alice standing beside me, and had not since either. He accepted my apologies and gave me the forgiveness I sought from the man I saw as my father. As much as he could with the garbled truth he had received from me upon my return.

I never told him about Jasper, I never told him about the hedonistic ways that I had fallen into.

He believed me to have fed only on those that I felt deserved death; murderers and rapists and the like.

He only suspected the truth, and if I could help it, he would never have them confirmed.

"Those interfering, flea bitten mongrels!" Alice's sudden growl had everyone's attention, including mine as I swiftly entered the kitchen. Alice was already looking at me, her eyes narrowed with annoyance and her mind blank. "They're going to Bella," she said, rolling her eyes, "When will they get it through their heads that just because I can't see them in my visions, doesn't mean I don't know where they're planning on going and when they're planning on doing it!"

My reaction was immediate as I headed towards garage entrance, my mind blinkered down to the one thought of protecting Bella. The wolves were dangerous, volatile creatures, while they were not ruled by the mood like their distant cousins; they were definitely ruled by their emotions. They hid behind truces and claims of protection of their people and the rest of the human race. But we knew them for what they were; brutal killers. And it was not just my own kind that fell to their claws and teeth. Their Chief and Shaman, William Black, always proclaimed the killings to be right and true. Spouting off half truths and outright lies, keeping the pack's zealous beliefs that the humans killed were destined to be Cold ones, intact.

And now the William's son had joined, taking his rightful place as Alpha, the son that had always fancied himself in love with Bella and was no doubt hoping for an imprint with her. Or worse. If William had realised the chance of Jacob imprinting on Bella as remote and impossible as it truly is, then the teachings may have changed and we would likely find ourselves fending off the rabid beasts when they try to 'save' Bella from her fate.

Alice's foresight was useless in gaining any idea on their goals, that was where my gift would come in, but like she had pointed out she would easily be able to discern when they planned to strike and where. From what I had seen in Alice's mind, there would be a phone call. And that phone call was due to happen within the next thirty seconds. More than enough time for me to intercept whoever they deemed necessary to send over. I could only fathom that this was the reason for Charlie's invitation for a cook out over there this evening, one that he would have normally turned down due to it being a school night for Bella. But William had been relentless in his quest and Charlie had finally, if grudgingly, made the compromise of him switching shifts so that he had Friday night free and the cook out was rearranged. I had seen snippets of it in his mind when I had been by to pick Bella up earlier, albeit fleeting and nonlinear. While Charlie does not possess the same level of shielding as his daughter, the potential is certainly still there and unless he is thinking hard about something, then I am blocked from his thoughts.

Alice stopped me before I had completed two steps, her small hand on my arm and large eyes looking at me with a curious mixture of pleading and annoyance. I huffed out a long breath, glaring down at her and waiting for her to explain her actions. I was in no mood for interference or anymore litanies regarding how she had warned me not to act on something that she had accidentally let slip. As the holder of the future, Alice usually kept it well guarded, but guarding ones thoughts all of the time is night on impossible, and occasionally things slip through that she does not want me to see. Or does not feel that it is right for me to see.

"Edward, you cannot go to her, not now. She is still far too volatile in her emotions; she doesn't want to see any of the family. Rosalie will go, she is more than capable of keeping the curs away."

My own undignified snort was in tandem with Rosalie's bored and annoyed one, mine turning into a growl when Alice forewent the need to allow me to actually voice my objections, preferring to simply talk over me instead.

"Exactly, Edward, Bella hates Rosalie, and Rosalie couldn't give two hoots about Bella." She smiled lovingly over at her mate, images of their past and future liaisons running through her mind, causing me to grimace, "It is simply one of the things that makes her so special." Turning back to me she carried on as if nothing untoward had occurred, "Bella won't get hurt more by being visited by one of us that she cares about. She won't be as embarrassed if Rosalie were to go, that if it were Carlisle, Esme or Emmett." She rolled her eyes again, grimacing to herself and biting her lip. A habit that she had copied from Bella. "Now if you or I were to go, well that would not be pretty. She is understandably mad at you, and would try to take a can of hairspray and her lighter at you. And me? Well, as seen as you didn't explain the situation to her properly, she blames me for the whole debacle as well. Which," Alice poked me hard in the chest, "you will be fixing at the earliest opportunity. I don't want my best friend mad at me because of your impatient and over protective stupidity."

Then, changing completely and smiling like butter would not melt in her mouth, she returned to her mates, standing on her tiptoes to kiss Rosalie goodbye before curling herself around Emmett.

I stood there feeling somewhat redundant as Rosalie walked out at her leisure, choosing to drive instead of run all the way there. Emmett and Alice quickly retired to their room, giving me a sense of relief that everything would turn out well due to Alice's lack of worry, but also inwardly groan at the prospect of Emmett marvelling at how well he can manoeuvre Alice into so many different positions. Smirking, I turned to leave, thinking that if only Emmett knew what I had done, what I had experienced, he would never feel himself superior in terms of sexual encounters and prowess.

"Edward, we need to talk, do you not think?" Esme called out, her voice deceptively kind. Of course, I knew what was coming. My mother and father figures both felt the need to have a talk with their 'first born'. However, Carlisle had more reasons other than my treatment of Bella.

Turning back around, I acknowledged her request, as well as the silent one that the discussion take place in the gazebo on the outskirts of our garden. All the better not to hear the raging sex going on above us. We all took seats beneath the wooden structure, the scent of honeysuckle filling the air from where it wound around the wood above and around us. Esme and Carlisle presented a united front, sitting across from me, taking their time and letting me sweat. Figuratively, of course. It never ceased to amaze me that I still saw them as parents, even after leaving the family when I did, when I returned it was like returning home. They were the only parental figures that I knew, my biological parents nothing but a blurry image that my mind held onto during the change.

"Edward, I do not think that I have to tell you how disappointed I am by the nights turn of events," Esme began, her mind a sea of flowers and nothing more. She was doing her best to hide from me. "But, I feel that things may have turned out for the best." She smiled sadly at my look of utter shock, "I know, that was not what you were expecting, but we have all seen Bella's decline, especially over the last two weeks. Heard her screams in the night when she slept here, and we saw your worry. While I wish that we had found out differently, I do believe that it does not change the fact that we now know, and that there must be some way for us to combat these...desires and fantasies that her subconscious has concocted. I guess it was only a matter of time before our presence and her future began to weigh upon her. It is not surprising that she would dream such things, things that I believe are her survival instincts finally kicking in and warning her away from us."

I schooled my expression, watching Esme carefully; she truly believed what she was saying. She was sure that Bella had concocted these nightmares in a latent attempt at warning herself away from us and from what she is to become.

Carlisle, however, was not so sure, "Unless, of course, there is some other insight that you can give us into this, Edward." he said, studying me as he did so, "Bella's dream was very specific and detailed, and incredibly vivid to her. Not to mention that it was not you that starred in them, it was a nameless male that called to her baser instincts."

I looked away from him, feeling guilty and not wanting him to see that. Not wanting to see the doubt that I heard in his mind etched into his features. Esme understood what her husband was hinting at, gasping quietly and taking Carlisle's hand.

"You believe she is dreaming of their third?" Esme asked, a smile threatening to take over her delicate features. I felt a pang in my chest, knowing that she would not be so happy if she were to find out just who our third was, and yet I still could not tell the truth.

Carlisle was still looking at me as he spoke, "That would be my best guess in this situation, given the severity of Bella's dream and the content. Still, I would think that you would have sensed something also, Edward."

Glancing at him, I smiled wryly, "I have sensed nothing, but then I have spent all of my time focusing on Bella." I answered evenly, and it was the truth. I had not felt the initial pull of finding ones mate; I had not felt it because in essence I had already found both sometime ago.

Carlisle didn't say anything more out loud, instead his calm voice echoed through my mind.

'I know you, son, I know you and there is something that you are keeping from us'

"Well, that just will not do." Esme exclaimed, interrupting Carlisle and I's standoff. "He must be a human drinker, which is not unusual of course. Do you think he will be easily brought into our diet? I hate to think of Bella being corrupted in such a way, and Edward having to relive some of his darker days."

I stifled a laugh; Jasper was the epitome of the true vampire. He revelled in blood and all the pleasures derived from it. It was why I knew he would never have come back with me, why I could never have brought him here. After Alice had...I shook my head, looking out towards the forest that bordered our property, but not really seeing it. I was thoroughly encased in the past, in everything that I had succumbed to and fully immersed myself in when I was with Jasper.

I always knew that we would meet again. I wanted it, longed for it, needed it. There was no way of being whole without your third, especially not after having met and been with them. The question is; which one of Alice's prophesised futures would come true.

Would Bella and I be able to resist temptation and bring Jasper into the light?

Or would we fall with him and revel in the darkness?

A/N So...there it is. I hope everyone enjoyed it, feel free to leave any comments, questions or spanks in my review box. If there's anyone still reading that is LOL.