Chapter 6

Quite a bit of snow had fallen throughout the day, so by the time Sam finally let herself into her house near midnight, the landscape was covered in a blanket of white that reflected the pale light of a half moon. It was both beautiful and cold, and Sam couldn't help but wish once again for the warmth of an open brazier.

Her house was almost as cold inside as it was out, and she made her way quickly to the thermostat to turn up the heat. For some reason, she had chosen to leave the lights off. Part of her wondered if it wasn't because she didn't want to face the fact that the life she had been living for more than two weeks didn't exist, that she didn't reside with hundreds of people in a thermal plant under the ice but here, in this house. Alone.

She walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water. As she stood at her kitchen sink, she thought back over the events of the last 24 hours. In one day, her entire world had changed, quite literally. Things had slowed down considerably, though, once they had returned to the SGC. It had taken a long time, but Janet had finally given them medical clearance, and for that she realized she should be grateful. Hammond had likewise taken pity on them and postponed the debrief until 0800 the next morning. He had ordered them all to go home and rest. Unfortunately, he had also mentioned something about appointments with MacKenzie.

She didn't know how long she'd been staring out of her kitchen window, when suddenly she heard a knock at the door. She closed her eyes. Only one person would come by her house at this hour.

Sam opened the door to find her commanding officer standing on her front porch, hands in his jeans pockets, handsome as ever. It always disarmed her to see him in his civvies; it reminded her that they had lives outside of the SGC, even if they didn't spend much time enjoying them.

He looked at her expectantly. "Can I come in?" She opened the door a little wider, and he moved into her dark foyer. She shut the door and turned to face him, trying to keep her expression neutral. "How are you doing?" he asked, his concern evident.

She shrugged. "Fine, sir."

He blew out a large breath. "Sam..." he started, clearly unpersuaded by her act.

"How do you think I'm doing, Jack?" she snapped, though she didn't know why she was suddenly angry.

But he didn't rise to the bait. "Well, if it's anything like me, not well," he said simply. He sighed. "Listen, what you said to Fraiser...you didn't tell her about us."

"No," she confirmed.

"I just wanted to let you know that I backed you up. I assumed that was what you wanted."

His voice was almost wistful, and it seemed to Sam that maybe he wished she had confessed everything to Janet. But he couldn't possibly want to deal with the fallout, could he?

"If she knew, we wouldn't be able to stay on SG-1 together, right?"

"That's right," he said slowly.

"So we really didn't have a choice, did we?"

Jack didn't say anything for a moment, and when he finally spoke, his voice was soft. "There's always a choice, Sam."

Her anger flared. "Is there, Jack? So we admit to being together and then what? Besides confirming every rumor there's ever been about the two of us." It wasn't fair that he expected her to choose, that she would take all of the responsibility for the consequences of their actions. "Tell me, Jack, are you willing to give up SG-1? Could you sit back and watch me go through the 'gate without you? Because I'm not sure I could watch you do it without me."

"I don't know," he answered honestly.

She closed her eyes. He didn't deserve her ire. He was just as much a victim of the situation as she was. Tears welled up in her eyes, and her voice quivered with barely restrained emotion. "Those people we were - Jonah, Thera. They weren't real."

"No."

Sam was quiet for a long time, refusing to meet his gaze. She was working up the courage to pose the question she really wanted ask. Finally she looked directly at him. "What about their feelings?" she asked softly. "Were those real?"

Jack stared at the floor, trying to figure out whether it would make things better or worse to tell her the truth. He'd lied to himself about their relationship so often over the years, it had become second nature. But somehow it didn't seem right to lie to her, especially not now.

"They were real," he said quietly. "At least they were for me." He paused and looked her straight in the eye. "Every last one of the them," he finished, punctuating each syllable with his voice breaking a bit on the final word.

She nodded and felt the tears she could no longer hold back begin to make their way down her cheeks. "Me too," she whispered.

Jack gathered her into his arms and held on as tightly as he could. Sam put her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, letting the tears come.

Outside the window, the snow began to fall once again.

oOoOoOo

1 Day Earlier

Jonah lowered his head and placed a gentle, lingering kiss on Thera's lips, relishing the feeling of her fingers running up and down his spine as she lay beneath him. He let out a contented sigh and rolled over onto his back, pulling her to him. She snuggled into his side and laid her head on his chest.

Over the past few days, they had made good use of the space Jonah had found, spending most of their free time there. It was surprisingly private and cozy, as it was located behind at least two braziers that gave the area a warm glow and kept them comfortable despite their habitual lack of clothing.

As Thera relaxed into Jonah's embrace, she felt her earlier euphoria morph into a profound sense of serenity. She smiled as she listened to his rapid heartbeat begin to slow. He planted another kiss on top of her head and threaded his fingers through her hair. In response, she began drawing lazy patterns on his chest.

Her hand drifted lower, and he let out a deep chuckle. "You're going to have to give me a few minutes, Thera. I'm not as young as I used to be." She let out a soft snort by way of reply. "Hey, no giggling," he said quietly, giving her a squeeze.

Instantly, visions of an ice cave sprang to mind, the large ring from her dreams standing upright in the background. Thera grasped at the vision, but all she could remember was extreme cold, a paralyzing sense of despair, and the need to hold Jonah to her as tightly as possible.

Mentally, she shook her head. It must have been another dream. She was holding Jonah, but they were here in the thermal plant, not a cave, and she was both warm and happy. Still, the vision disturbed her, and she thought back on their earlier conversation with Karlan. "Jonah?"

"Hmmm?" he replied sleepily.

"I've been thinking about Karlan..."

He was quiet for a minute before responding. "Well, that's...disappointing."

She let out a small laugh and nuzzled his neck. "No, I mean, about what he said. About our memories from another life coming to the surface."

"Forget about Karlan," he said dismissively. "He's a nut job."

Thera wasn't so sure. "You haven't had a few memories you can't explain?"

He sighed. "Maybe a few. What are you worried about?"

"What if...what if we really are completely different people? What if we have other lives where we don't know each other..."

"Oh, we know each other," he replied definitively.

Like him, that much she knew was certain. "Okay," she replied, warming to her subject. "What if we don't like each other? What if you can't stand me?"

She felt him smile. "Listen, Thera, regardless of what might happen, I know at least one thing that's never going to change."

"What's that?" she asked, genuinely curious.

He was quiet for so long, Thera thought he'd fallen asleep. But then he spoke, and his words caused her breath to catch. "I love you," he said softly.

Thera raised up on her elbows, so that she could see his face, and when she looked into his eyes, she knew that what he said was true. Her heart swelled with joy. "I love you, too," she whispered. Jonah kissed her tenderly, and she lay back down with his arms wrapped tightly around her.

Before long, they drifted off to sleep, warmed by the soft glow of the braziers and confident in the knowledge that, despite whatever might happen, they would always be together.

The End

A/N - Yes, I know. Angst. But after seeing the expressions on our favorite couple's faces at the end of BTS, I just couldn't write this story any other way. While it is canon compliant, I'll leave it to your interpretation as to where Jack and Sam take things from here. Or maybe I'll do a non-canon sequel at some point. ;)

Thanks for reading, and for all the reviews, follows, and favorites. I really can't express sufficiently how much I appreciate it. I hope you all enjoyed the story, but in any event, please let me know what you think!