Thank you very much to all of you for reading and for the kind reviews. I own nothing
Several weeks later, Emily was ready to take another pregnancy test again. She was anxiously waiting for Derek to come home from work. He, then, came home and saw the look in her eyes as he knew what that look meant.
"Another test?" He asked her.
She does not need to answer. Emily went to the bathroom, to piddle, and got out of the bathroom and she gave the test to Derek see the result for her. While they were waiting for the result, Emily was walking around as she always did, and Derek was getting a little nervous because after each negative result she was getting more and more depressed and frustrated and of course he was not even a little happy with this. He said:
"Emily, listen, I really wish you could take it easier… this is nothing…"
"Our baby is nothing for you?
"No, I'm not talking about our baby, she or he will be very welcome when God thinks it's time, but all these tests and results, this has to be fun for us… so, don't put too much pressure as you are putting every time you do a test… it kills me to see you that way…"
After this talk, of course the test result was ready, and Emily said, pointing to the table coffee:
"I think the result is ready…" Begging with her eyes for him to look at it.
Derek took the result in his hand, and he just looked at her; and she understood the look. Emily withdrew from the living room and ran to her bedroom, she was crying now and she does not want him to see it; bullshit, of course he knew she was crying. He went into their bedroom behind her:
"Em, look, please ... look at me ... you do need to be this way ..."
"Derek, you do not understand! You have no idea how much I want this, and how I feel frustrated that I'm not able to get pregnant! For how long we've been trying? I know that I am now paying for my mistake from my past…"
"What are you talking about?"
Emily sat up in her bed, she had already said too much to turn back, and Derek would be her husband after all, so he needed to know:
"Derek, in the past, I did something I'm not proud of…"
Derek sat beside her in bed. And she continued talking:
"Derek, I never told you about this, but I think you deserve to know: when I was 15….. and… Do you remember that exorcism case, about Matthew? You knew something was up, but I never told you…. what had happened….Well Matthew helped me through the most difficult time of my life…. I was only 15 and I got pregnant and I did not know what to do, I could not tell my Mom….. Matthew was there with me when I went for an abortion… I never told you about this, I wish I did but it was part of my life that I wanted to keep buried, but now my past is haunting me… What if this abortion I had at 15 is one of the reason I cannot get pregnant now… What if God is punishing me?"
"Oh, Emily, of course not! God does not punish anyone, is that we reap what we sow, is that we are responsible for what happens in our life, but at 15, you're no more than a child, a child from what I know, devoid of love, is natural that you have surrendered to some guy to feel loved, but there was no way at 15,for you to raise a child alone. God understands this, and you need to forgive yourself!"
Derek took both her hands in his, and said:
"You need to forgive yourself, Emily; you need to take the guilt out of you. It may be that what is hindering you from getting pregnant. You're not guilty of anything! Our baby is on the way soon, but if it does not happen, I am already very happy now, because I'm one of those rare people who found a soul mate in life… I could not be happier than I already am by your side, my love…"
Emily smiled, and they hugged.
For the next few days, Derek was traveling with the BAU for a very complicated case in California. Emily then was going to be alone for a few days, she decided to visit a doctor who specializes in human reproduction. She was to consult with the best expert doctor in this area. She went alone for the consult because Derek was traveling for work on a case and she did not want to say anything to him about it.
Emily went alone at the doctor's office. She arrived at the clinic shortly before the appointed hour, the place was very beautiful and chic, black granite floor, she walked up the marble counter of the reception, and told the secretary:
"Good morning, I have a doctor's appointment at ten o'clock."
"Excuse me for a moment. What is your name?"
"Emily Prentiss."
"Okay, Mrs. Prentiss. Please let me see your documents."
Emily gave an identity to her. And the girl said:
"You can wait a moment, please, the doctor will meet you."
"Okay, thank you."
Emily was apprehensive, she was a mix of doubt and uncertainty, she really wanted it to happen naturally, but at the same time, she felt that she could wait no longer, in her case, her age, she felt that every month, every week, every day, every hour, every minute, every second lost, meant an increased difficulty for her to get pregnant, and she saw increasingly distant her dream to become reality. Emily was removed from her thoughts by the secretary's voice calling her:
"Mrs. Prentiss, the doctor will see you now."
"Thank you."
Emily got up and went to the doctor's office.
"Good morning…" She said to him, inside his office.
"Good morning, Mrs. Prentiss. How can I help you?"
Emily felt a little out of her environment, kind of embarrassed. The doctor was not a profiler, of course, but he was very familiar with that kind of situation, so he said:
"Mrs. Prentiss, usually people come to me because the process of getting pregnant is complicated. This is your case, right?"
"Yes… Here are my latest gynecological exams."
The doctor looked carefully the last gynecological examinations that Emily had done.
"Mrs. Prentiss, from what I'm seeing here, you are perfectly healthy to get pregnant, I see that your menstrual cycle fluctuates a little bit, it makes things even harder for you to get pregnant naturally. The most recommended age for childbearing is between 20 and 30 years old, since the woman is very fertile, and produces multiple ovarian follicles. Well, in your case, these follicles decrease to 12%, and egg production drops to 5%, which implies the difficulty to conceive naturally very high. I'm sorry but I have to act with great sincerity here…"
Emily was hearing and swallowing.
"That's okay, doctor. I appreciate that you are being honest…So, what are my chances?"
"Well, you can just keep trying to conceive naturally, but know that it's a risk because in your case it is like swimming against the tide, because it can happen, and it can never happen; now you still have a chance, but in a few years, you may not have a chance anymore…Or we can opt for a kind of treatment to accelerate the process…"
"What kinds of treatment?"
"Nowadays, there are many types of treatment, the most commonly used techniques are: the natural insemination, which consists in inducing ovulation, are prescription drugs that will produce many eggs, many beyond the normal, in which case there is the risk of getting pregnant with twins or even triplets; and we have artificial insemination which is a process that occurs in the laboratory, in which sperm is placed into the female egg and have the process of in vitro fertilization, IVF this is done to remove the eggs from the patient and inseminated by the husband with sperm in the laboratory, namely, fertilization occurs in the laboratory and done at embryo transfer after three days in the uterus…"
Emily was processing all the information on her brain.
"Speaking of sperm, your partner has done the exam of sperm count? It is very important to know if he produces enough sperm to impregnate a woman."
"I… I…. actually don't know…"
"So, I suggest you talk to him… and you two do it together… it's pretty important you two do all the process to get pregnant together… Where is he now?"
"He is working right now…"
"Yeah… but it's pretty important he be with you right now… in all these steps, showing how much he wants this too…"
"He does a very important job…"
"Okay, these are just suggestions…"
"Thank you doctor, I will talk to him…and for certain, we are going to see each other very soon…."
"I hope so Mrs. Prentiss, and remember: happiness does not knock on our door, we do have to go get it…"
Emily left the office and went to a mall nearby. She lunched there, and walked around, looking storefronts. She looked at the shop windows for baby things, she entered the baby stores; looked at cribs, clothes, strollers, and the store smelled of baby perfume. There she saw many pregnant women and mothers. A saleswoman came to meet her:
"You're looking for a gift? We have several options here…"
It was very obvious that Emily was not pregnant, the woman could see by the thinness of her, but it left Emily a little sad, she was very sensitive lately. Emily was walking through the mall to try to get distracted, and she also went to the cinema in the mall, she was really needed to take her mind off the situation. After she spent a whole morning in the doctor office and the entire afternoon and part of the night in the mall, Emily went home; she just was not expecting to find Derek there; now, he was the one making a hole in the floor, passing one side to another of the living room. She entered the house, and he said to her:
"Em, where have you been? I was so worried about you… I could not get a hold of you through your cell phone, I called you the whole day, I left you many voice mail messages… I was about to have a nation wide search for you…"
"I'm sorry… I did not know you were already at home…"
She passed him, and climbed the stairs to their bedroom, fully introspective; she already was a naturally reserved and closed person, but the whole situation was making her be even more closed, she felt that when he put her feet out of the cinema; she put her feet back into her sad reality.
Derek was an explosive temper, and he was already at the limit of this situation, he climbed the stairs behind her. He entered their bedroom, saying:
"Okay, I'm tired of this situation! You know there are far worse things happening in the world? You know I just got back from a case in which we are working four days and the guy raped, tortured and killed over ten innocent children? And he pointed a gun to my head, for over half an hour? I just wanted to get home and find a little support!"
She looked at him, kind of desperate:
"I'm sorry that I was not here waiting for you, I'm sorry if I can not be the wife that you need…"
"What? What are you saying? Emily… you are totally out of your mind… what about 'soul mate' and how much 'I love you'… I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ARE SAYING THIS…"
"He vanished from the bedroom."
Derek went to the kitchen to prepare something for him to eat, and Emily was showering, she stayed in the bedroom for hours, Derek was in the living room watching sports on TV, after hours, she was more organized with the ideas in her mind , so she went down to talk to him:
"I'm sorry about the case, I'm glad you are home safe…"
Derek just looked at her, and looked back at the TV.
"Derek, I'm sorry the way I've been acting lately…"
"Okay, okay… this is important for you… I have no idea how this is important for you… I know all this, Emily…" He was very pissed still.
"Can we really talk?"
Derek turned off the TV, arms crossed, he look at her, waiting for her to talk:
"I went to see a doctor today… an expert in human reproduction… we talked a lot but the main thing is … by my age, my chances of getting pregnant naturally are just 5%, and since my period is irregular, it makes it more difficult…"
Derek let out all the air he was holding since he came home. Then he said:
"Emily I know how much you want this, but we are in this together, you cannot do this on your own, you should have told me, so I could be there with you all the way; we are in this together, but you keep losing sight of the fact that if we cannot have children, then, it is okay, we can just have our happy family of the two of us, or we can go to other options like adoption or surrogacy, if we really do want a bundle of joy, but we have to talk about everything, and you not telling me about this doctor and going on your own is not the way about going about things…"
"I'm so sorry, I could not wait for you, this whole thing and doubt was consuming me…."
She kept saying:
"He gave me some suggestions…"
"What do you mean?"
Emily explained the whole procedure and the medical options that the doctor had offered to her, all the details and information that the doctor had told her. Derek told her:
"Emily, I can do this exam, of sperm count… then if the problem was not with me, then, we talk, and whatever you decide, we can do whatever you decide…"
"Okay, thank you… Derek… I'm so sorry again… I'm very proud of you because you help to solve one more case and get out of the streets one more evil person, and I'm very happy you are home safe, because I will really need your help in this whole process, not only to make the baby, but to also raise the baby, because I can see that you are born to be a father…"
Derek hugged her, and said in her ear:
"I was born to love you…"
They gave a passionate kiss in the mouth:
"I love you…"
I love you too…"
"So, now, finally, the good news: Hotch gave us two whole days, and you will have two whole days to practice…"
She smiled and they kissed again.
Next day, they were getting ready to go for a special trip that Derek had prepared for them. He would make a surprise for Emily, they got in the car and went, very early in the morning. It was a beautiful sunny day, then Emily left home wearing white clothing, fisherman pants, a white shirt and a thin fabric, and a cute hat, and sunglasses. Derek was in a bathing suit, shorts on top, and a shirt, and cap. Hidden from Emily, he put a bikini and towels in a backpack, because he had plans for it. They took the road, and Emily had no idea where they were going, but when it was getting close, he said:
"We are going to Maryland, enjoy a sunny day, princess…"
"Oh, Derek, I did not bring my bikini…"
"I picked it up, princess, do not worry…" He winked at her.
She smiled at him. Once there, Derek rented a yacht for them to go ride offshore. They were heading toward the sea; Derek driving the yacht and Emily beside him, they were already wearing only swimsuit and bikini now. They were well offshore now; beautiful day, blue sky completely clear; sun shining bright, Derek decided to stop the motor of the yacht for a while for a swim. He took a quick dip; saying:
"…You coming princess?"
"It is not my specialty to swim offshore."
Derek then plunged, only to get rid of the heat, and quickly returned to the yacht; hugging Emily, he was dripping, dripping wet, and she was all dry, so he dipped her, making her shiver. They kissed passionately. Derek sat on the seat of the yacht and pushed Emily to sit on his lap, the front to him, so that she was hugging him with both arms and both legs. They kissed passionately again. While kissing her on the mouth, he was holding her by the waist and saying, slowly, between kisses:
"You know…. Em…. This…. Bikini….. is…. Really…. Sexy….but… I like…. Much…. Much…. Much….definitely…. much…. More…. What… is…. Under… it…"
Emily smiled.
Derek was kind of having fun trying to untie her bikini strings using his teeth. He pulled the strings of her bikini of the top part with his teeth, while he untied the bottom part with his hands. Without the top part of the bikini, Derek took a second, just a second to admire the beauty of her breasts, before taking a nipple in his mouth, so that in a short time, he licked and sucked both breasts of her very hungrily, while Emily gently held his head; in a sort of total approval and surrender to what he was doing; and she moaned. Emily could feel an immense volume right under her bikini, the huge erection of him. So, she whispered in his ear:
"I think there are something right down here that really want to participate in all of this…
"Do you think…" He whispered back.
"Hmm hmm…" She affirmed.
"Well, it will be my pleasure to fix this…"
While he worked efficiently with his mouth and tongue on her nipples and mouth and neck, he took his huge erection out of the swimsuit and just pushed a little to the side her bikini for him to be able to insert his tool inside her, and Emily straddled on him. Emily and Derek were making love for the rest of the beautiful day, then, they just lay on the yacht in each others arms, before It could be dark night, they went back to get the car, and went back home.
At home, Emily hugged Derek, saying:
"Thank you, I just loved this day, like I love you… I cannot see myself without you anymore, I cannot believe we worked together for so much time and we could not share what we always felt for each other…"
"Yeah, princess, that's why I was always a player, because I could not be with the one I wanted to be with and that was you!"
They kissed again and went to sleep.
Next day, the team was still off duty, so Penelope and JJ went to visit Emily. JJ said as soon as Emily opened the door for them:
"I could not stop her; she dragged me and forced me to come here…" JJ said, jokingly. She kept talking:
"Yeah, Emily, she wants to plan your wedding now, every detail, even the underwear you will wear on your wedding day… I thought I told you it was your fiancee job to control her, she his Baby Girl after all…"
"Wait a second, you two lovelies, my blonde angel and my raven hair beauty are talking like I am not in this room…"
They all laughed. And Emily opened the door for them to enter. Derek was going out to play tennis with some friend. Emily said:
"JJ, I am nervous, you never know with Pen, she might have a picture of me and Derek naked on our wedding cake…"
"You have a picture like that? Can I use it?"
They all laughed again. Then they sat on the sofa and Penelope said:
"Well, well, well JJ. It looks like someone here is not the same person as that day of the engagement party… I am not seeing the same twinkle in these beautiful black eyes…"
Emily knew very well that it was for her, so she said:
"Oh, girls, I know. I'm much too focused on something else right now. I confess that I have not inched a milimeter for the organization of this wedding…"
JJ took Emily's hand in hers, she squeezed her hand and said:
"…The baby, right?"
"Yeah… this whole thing is driving me crazy, we keep trying and trying…"
"Wow, you should not complain… I would not complain if I have to make love with my chocolate thunder every second of my life!" Penelope said, jokingly.
"I'm not complaining, girls, don't get me wrong, I want so much to be a mother! You guys have no idea… Derek has been so patient with me, he is such a special person…he has been so kind all the time… we opted now for getting some medical help…"
"That's good, Em, I'm sure in the right time, it will happen…but it's important you keep yourself calm and don't pressure yourself…" JJ said.
JJ, Penelope, and Emily were there talking all the time and making plans for Emily's wedding, and they cooked lunch, and they had lunch together, and after Derek arrived, they were gone soon, so Emily was having a very nice time these two last days.
Two months later. Emily had not had menstruation during this period of two months, and she was feeling a little sick of her stomach, she just did not know if it was some kind of illusion on her part, fueled by immense desire to be pregnant, or if it was a real symptom, and she was finally really pregnant. In these two months, Derek had gone with her to the same doctor expert in human reproduction, to take the exam of sperm count; and the result was positive for him, he was fully able to impregnate a woman, he had a great sperm count, above average, actually. They had agreed with the doctor, they would try for a little more time to be pregnant naturally, maybe for a few more months.
She was now at home, waiting for Derek, to do another pregnancy test. Derek arrived at home late night, because of a difficult case BAU was working; it was past midnight already. Derek entered the house, he went straight to their bedroom, where Emily was sitting on the bed, her legs crossed looking at the box test.
"Hi…" She said to him.
Derek approached her and gave her a kiss on her lips, he sat on the bed next to her:
"Hi…"
"Derek, how was the case?"
"Well, unfortunately, an evil person had to be killed to be stopped; the worst thing is he killed five women before we caught him…"
"You always do a great job, Derek, I'm proud of you…"
"I see another test…"
Emily smiled nervously. She said:
"Yeah, but… you don't have to… if… you…"
"Let's do it…"
Emily went to the bathroom with the test in hands, to pee. She came out of the bathroom and delivered the test to him to see the result…"
Is Emily finally pregnant with all the great efforts,determination and all the experts help, please tell me what you think and please give me your input,suggestions and ideas. Thank you very much in advance.