Storybrooke Sheriff's Department
Offense/Incident Report
Arrest Number:
Case Number: 09302
Date of Report: 02/23/12
Report Status: Incident [ ] Offense [ ] Felony [ ] Misdemeanor [X]
Investigating Officer: Sheriff Emma Swan
Source of Incident: Dispatch
Reporting Person Information:
Name: Gordon Restley
Occupation: High School Custodian
Incident Classification: Vandalism.
Description:
Reporting person Restley called in a vandalism at local high school, Storybrooke High. Reported strange dents in wall as though a long thin object had been rammed into it (Pole? Cane?). Also reported an adult male speedo, golden, left at crime scene. Speedo was sodden with traces of red pubic hair and the sweat of fear. Also present at the scene was a set of footprints made from water, which have been photographed. Footprints appear to be from Armani shoes of a particularly long and narrow make, indicating someone either very tall or with magnificently skinny feet.
High schoolers report hearing shouting, swearing, and a Scottish accent in the vicinity. Eviscerated water wings were found in the chemistry lab, where several volatile substances were missing. High schooler Britney Essex reports seeing 'that weird guy my mom hates, who dresses like he's gay, only he was just wearing these pink boxers' in the halls.
Conclusion: Mr. Gold has started doing chemistry experiments for revenge. Stay away from his and Hopper's houses.
CASE SOLVED.