Aaaahh! I'm so sorry! Dx It took me waaay too long to update this, and I don't think I could apologize enough. D: I wanted to make this chapter bigger then this, but I figured I'd post what I had so at least you would know I wasn't dead. My life is starting to slow down, so this really shouldn't happen again.

Please R&R!

"War may sometimes be a necessary evil. But no matter how necessary, it is always an evil, never a good. We will not learn how to live together in peace by killing each other's children."

Jimmy Carter

ENTRY TWELVE: WATER

"Oh no, please. I can't drink any more."

"What? Don't be silly; you've only had two!"

Mai laughed nervously, pushing away the man offering her more alcohol and reminding him that they were underage. She didn't think that mattered though, and her friends were already drunk. Kira had insisted on using the time to update the Strike.

Later, the Desert Dawn's elder gave a memorial to the fallen; the candles and desert flowers. The group watched as the names were counted off one by one, feeling the sorrow evaporate into a kind of hope.

"Amazing…" she whispered. Before she knew it, she had run back to the others to drag them into the sun.

"This is so great!"

"I can't believe how nice this feels to be out here!"

She laughed, feeling the breeze and the sun on her skin as she spun around. Mai stumbled, but Miriallia quickly caught her before she fell and brought her to her feet with Tolle's help.

"Careful now," he chuckled. Mai smiled sheepishly, before dragging him to the railing beside his girlfriend. The two of them, joined by Kuzzey seconds later, began to talk. She didn't pay attention at first.

Mai felt the breeze wash over her, chilling the burning layer of the sun and simply making her a comfortable warm. She could remember this feeling, but from a time long ago.

So, she began to hum, loud enough for everyone around to hear.

Her friends were quiet for a minute, listening to her song, before continuing their conversation.

Kuzzey sighed. "It sure is beautiful, but it's making me dizzy…."

"Oh yeah, this is your first time at sea, right Kuzzey?" Tolle questioned. Kuzzey nodded. "Weren't you born on Heliopolis?"

"Yeah….. The desert scared me, but this….. Doesn't it get really deep?"

"Yep. And there are huge monsters at the bottom waiting to attack those who stay too long!"

Kuzzey froze.

"Tolle, don't tease him."

"Sorry, Mir."

Mai ended her song, resting a hand on Kuzzey's shoulder and smiled. "It's not as bad after you see it the first time." She closed her eyes, "it's so calming…"

"Have you seen the ocean before, Mai? Weren't you, you know….."

"My family visited often when I was young, and we'd spend a lot of time on beaches in the summer. Even though… I was born on the PLANTS."

Silence. The realization of her being a Coordinator hitting them like it did before. She began to hum again, breaking the quiet and returning everyone to their previous state.

Several minutes later, something caught her eyes from the lower deck. Mai excused herself to get a drink.

"Berserkers were usually kind and gentle, but once they went into battle they were completely different people."

Kira sighed, Mu's words still fresh in his mind despite the time that had past. He tightly gripped the fabric of his pants, bringing his other hand to his forehead.

He had to fight. To protect.

Thinking of this, and who he needed to fight, he began to cry. He was getting tired of everything.

Behind him, he heard the door slide open, but silence followed. Was it a glitch?

"…. Kira?" he heard from beside him, causing him to jump and turn in the direction of the voice. Her face was only a metre away, her blue eyes wide.

"Kira?" she repeated.

He blinked, unable to find the right answer. Why was she here, talking to him? Wasn't she upset?

Mai looked away. Kira could sense the awkwardness between them and their silence. He stood, turning to walk away from her. Not only did he not want her to see him like this, but he was convinced she didn't want to really see him in general. He'd save her the anguish.

"Wait!" she stuttered out, stopping him. She showed him the canned drink in her hands. "I thought… You might have gotten thirsty sitting out here in the sun…" She paused. "Have you been crying?"

In his shock, he made the mistake of meeting his eyes with hers. Her own widened and the cans dropped to the floor. Before he could say anything, she embraced him, wrapping her arms around his body. At first, he felt her body shaking slightly, but her body quickly became calm.

"It's alright… Please don't cry."

Kira opened his mouth to reply, to say he was fine now, but he couldn't. There was no way he could lie to her. He stayed, letting the warmth of her body calm his nerves. They stayed like that for a minute, Kira refusing to be the one to let go of this feeling. He refused to let go of her and the rare chance to have her so close.

When she broke apart, she slowly looked up at him, as if thinking she did something wrong. He was still speechless, until she smiled at him and apologized for dropping the drinks and possibly scaring him.

"Are you feeling better?" she asked him.

"Uh… I… yes," he managed out.

"I'm afraid the drinks didn't survive the fall…"

"Oh… I'll -" he started, about to offer to get new ones since she brought the originals, but the door opened again. This time, Cagalli stepped on to the deck, and noticed them.

Mai smiled. "Well, I was just about to get new drinks. Would you like one?"

Once she had calmed down, she knew it was time to go back. Her heart had been racing since the moment she'd seen him, and the last minute choice she made to comfort him.

She rested her forehead against the cool plastic of the vending machines before she purchased new drinks. Her face was red and warm, but she knew that would happen.

Mai hoped that Cagalli would still be on the dock when she returned, giving her an excuse not to run away.

And she was; Mai was grateful, but didn't say anything. She offered them the new drinks and sat beside Kira, everyone's back against the ship. They enjoyed the cools drinks as the wind hit them from the ocean. It was a beautiful day, and Mai was happy they could enjoy the sight of it like this.

"You know," Cagalli started, "you're a pretty strange guy." Kira turned, his face full of questions. "Just like the other day, for example, when you freaked out and then slapped me."

Mai wondered what she was talking about, but kept the question to herself. It must have happened when she had been in the infirmary; she touched her stomach at the memory. The wound had begun to scar now. She refused to linger on her quick healing and paid attention to the conversation around her.

Kira seemed to have recalled what had happened, his face falling to guilt as he apologized. Cagalli shook her head, "No… It's not that I'm really mad. But I wonder sometimes why on Earth you're a Coordinator in the first place."

"What?"

"Oh," she sighed, "that didn't come out right. I mean why are you fighting with the Earth forces when you're a Coordinator?"

Mai looked away, focusing on the can in her hands. She started to wonder how much Cagalli knew about her or her situation, when the girl in question turned to Mai after not getting an immediate response from Kira. "And you. I watched you fight, too well without prior training." Had Marrue talked to her? Or had another crewmember? "You're a Coordinator, aren't you?"

Mai forced herself to smile, hoping that to be a good enough answer. Cagalli sighed again, mumbling about the both of them.

"You probably think that's strange." Kira answered finally. "I get asked that a lot."

Cagalli gave Mai a quick glance before replying. "Whether or not people think it's strange is not the point. We're in a war where Coordinators and Naturals are determined to destroy the other no matter what the cost."

Because that's what they have been taught, Mai thought. From what she had seen, the ones who were fighting on the front lines were like puppets on a string. Told from the beginning which side to fight on, expected to eliminate those different from them. Both sides felt sorrow from those they lost, but neither side was right. She knew if it continued like it was, the war would never end. Mai didn't really have an idea of why she had chosen to fight on the side she was, but knew she couldn't go back.

Cagalli continued. "I mean, don't you have strong feelings about that?"

Kira paused. Mai felt his eyes on her before turning to Cagalli.

"What about you?"

"My feelings towards someone have nothing to do with being a Coordinator or a Natural."

"Same here," Kira said, the same time Mai had whispered her own agreement. They turned to her voice, hearing it for the first time since they sat down. She had been keeping her emotions controlled, staying close if Kira needed her again but wanting to be as far away as possible.

When she realized they were waiting for her to continue, she swallowed hard and said what had been on her mind. Her voice was shaking as she started. "When you're out there, fighting for those you want to protect, who is a Natural and who is a Coordinator doesn't really matter. Each side fights only who they see as an enemy, but as far as I've seen, both sides are the same."

Cagalli didn't seem to understand her words fully, but Mai could sense Kira's feelings match hers in that minute. They had both felt the overwhelming need to protect, even if it meant fighting their own. The thought alone tore her heart in pieces.

She was reminded again of how her own flesh and blood wanted to kill her as Kira took over explaining how similar Coordinators and Naturals were.

"Like Naturals, we're only born with the potential. We have to sharpen our skills by learning and training properly. We're not gifted just because we're born as Coordinator's." Mai nodded, agreeing with his words. "It is true that we don't catch deadly diseases, and that our genes were altered before we were born to enhance our physical and mental abilities."

Mai quickly turned towards the door, thinking she heard footsteps. The other two hadn't noticed, so she wondered if she had imagined it. She guessed that her rest should also include sleep, but she didn't want to leave.

Or at least until a certain pink haired girl danced out in front of them and called out to Kira. The other pain came crashing down on her with every little flirtatious move that Flay made to get his attention. The comforting numb of being around Kira melted into a screaming pain.

When Kira stood, Flay wrapped herself around him in an instance, saying that they should go back to his room. That had done it; the lump in Mai's throat made it impossible to speak louder then a whisper when apologizing for leaving to do her work.

She barely made it into the next hall when the alarm sounded.

The Strike and the Ecran couldn't fly on Earth, and neither mobile suit could swim. The thought made her incredibly nervous as she waited to launch. She had seen data on a Scale System Wizard, a pack for the Ecran like the Blaze Wizard, but the Scale System hadn't been installed to the Archangel. Even with the scale system, it would be hard for the Ecran to stay in the water.

Without being able to move much, Kira and Mai were forced to hide behind the front legs of the Archangel, waiting for the underwater enemy mobile suits to surface. While Kira watched the water, Mai watched the sky. Several DINNs, flying mobile suits meant for Earth's atmosphere, danced in the air as they threatened to attack. She fired her beam rifle to separate them, but she was running out of shots.

"I know that, but we need to do something right now!"

Mai flinched at the sound of his voice, wondering why he was no longer muted. She wondered who he was arguing to, but the thought was cut short as one of the underwater attackers, which she finally recognized as GOOhNs, poked its head out of the water and attacked. The angle was too awkward for her to fire. As she opened her keypad to warn the ship, she watched the familiar blur of the Strike fly past her left screen. Mai cried out for him, knowing the Strike wouldn't be able to last long under water.

Mai watched the surface, not being able to find him through the flashes of light. She couldn't help him if she couldn't see him, so she forced herself to focus on the DINNs flying towards her. With their attention on her, Mu and his Skygrasper were able to destroy the leftover missiles aimed at the Archangel.

One of her shots managed to destroy a DINNs wing, while the Archangel's valiant's destroyed it as it turned to retreat. She bit her lip at the unnecessary death. The death may have been necessary for their survival, but she still couldn't help but think about the one who died. The family and friends who would grieve for the death of a loved one.

Mai turned her attention away and searched for Kira again. He was taking too long.

"Kira?" She called to him. She waited, but received no answer. Trying again, she was uncomfortable with the way her voice would break.

Suddenly, the Strike shot out from the water. Without knowing why she reacted, the Ecran reached to grab its hand before it could fall back to the water.

"Thanks."

Her worries disappeared with his voice, but the pain had appeared to the front of her mind. It hurt so much to love him.

The doctor sighed, not liking the silence that followed his report. His report laid spread out on the desk between him and the Captain. Mu La Flaga watched over her soldier, just as silent as she was.

Slowly, she removed her face from her hands and looked at him. "Are you… sure that you did not make a mistake?"

The doctor nodded, pointing out a diagram in front of her. "I've double checked the DNA of their blood, just to make sure I hadn't made a mistake. In comparison to a Natural crewmember on the ship," he points to one sheet, before sliding his finger to the next, "the two of them share many similarities. But, when you compare them to each other…"

Marrue examined the three DNA samples before her. The first one, titled with the name of the crew member the blood had been donated by. It showed the two single colored strands spiralling around each other, smaller pieces lining the stands and meeting in the middle. This was a normal generic code chain, which she had seen hundreds of times before.

The next one was similar to the first, with only two major differences between them. She compared the colours of the smaller strands, noticing that many of them had switched places. Unable to identify the chemicals in the diagram, she only paid any attention to the faint white strand weaving its way up the middle. The doctor had told them he was unable to identify what the strand was, but Kira's name at the top of the sheet must have meant this was a typical Coordinator chain.

The third and last was the one that had them all confused; the generic chain that belonged to the familiar blue haired Ensign. There was only one difference between the two children, which was the strand that separated Naturals and Coordinators.

She sighed and rubbed her temples, not able to figure out what it meant. If the doctor hadn't been able to find an explanation, what hope did she have?

Mai's unknown stand was a pure white.

I've always heard that children are given a destined path when they are born, that their future is decided for them. As I watch those two grow, fighting for us and against their own, I realized what I had been told wasn't true. We choose our own path, as they had chosen theirs.

Marrue Ramius

Don't forget to R&R~! I'll do my best now to add more and double the size of the next chapter!