Part 2. Jack.

Jack stared hollow eyed at the piece of paper in front of him. His name is Alonso. What the hell had the Doctor been thinking? Did he really imagine that he was so shallow that a pretty face and nice uniform would actually help? He'd have done better re-asking him the question he posed back in the radiation filled room on Malcassairo – he'd have an answer for him now.

Not that it would do any good. There was no way out for him, not ever. Jack laughed humourlessly into his drink, knowing it was that or cry. "Well Alonso, I don't know what he told you about me, but I'm really not in the mood."

Alonso looked at him wide eyed and then blushed. "I'm not trying to pick you up," he said sounding rather embarrassed, as he fidgeted with collar of his uniform. "The Doctor told me to take you this address and to give you these." He took another creased piece of paper and a pair of tickets for a space cruise out of his pocket and placed it on the bar in front of Jack. "He said there was someone there that you'd want to see, and he told me to tell you that he was sorry he couldn't have done it sooner."

"He says that a lot. There's no one left I want to see," Jack said, picking up his drink and downing it in a single gulp. "At least no one there's a chance of seeing. Just leave me alone."

"To do what? Drink yourself into coma?" Alonso said disapprovingly at the row of empty glasses on the bar. "Look I'm not even going to pretend I know what is going on, but he seemed very sure you would want to see him."

"Who?" Jack asked wearily as he waved the bartender over to order another drink. Being left alone to drink until he couldn't think anymore, until there was some respite from the grief and guilt that plagued him had been his intention. It still was if he was honest. He knew he'd feel guilty as hell in the morning and that he'd be disgusted with himself for allowing himself to forget even for a few hours. But in a twisted way that felt right too, it helped to keep the guilt fresh and stopped it from fading.

There was pity in Alonso's eyes as looked at Jack, seeing the misery and despair there. "I don't know his name. I only saw him for couple of minutes, when the Doctor showed me where he was staying. A young man, dark hair, funny accent, really pale, he'd been very ill from what I understood."

Something twists uncomfortably in Jack's chest, a stupid, impossible hope that he couldn't allow himself to believe, because he knew it would crush him when he inevitably found out he was wrong.

"I've only got a limited amount of leave before I have to get back to my ship and I'd rather be spending with some pleasant company rather than a drunk whose coat smells like something died in it, but the Doctor said that you'd listen, that you'd come with me, and I owe the Doctor a great deal. My life in fact," Alonso said, then got off his bar stool and waited for Jack to do the same. "All I know is that he went to a lot of trouble to for you and I think you should be grateful."

"Fine," Jack said with absolutely no enthusiasm. "I'll go. It's not like I've got anything better to do."

He followed Alonso through the bustling streets, hating the fact that his immortality was burning through the alcohol in him, sobriety reasserting itself despite his wish that it wouldn't. Eventually Alonso stopped outside a hotel next to the space port. "He's in room seven on floor thirty four." He handed Jack a card. "You'd best just let yourself in."

"You're not coming with me?" Jack asked, surprised. What made Alonso think that as soon as he was gone he wouldn't just toss the key card in the trash and go and find another bar?

Alonso shook his head. "I told you, I've only got another couple of days leave and then it's back to work. And there's a very nice dance bar that I want to visit. So if you'll excuse me."

"Sure, whatever." Jack managed the ghost of a smile. "You go live, have fun. Someone should."

Jack watched Alonso leave, then turned back to look at the hotel. He turned that card through his fingers, then sighed. "What the hell, not like I've got anything left to lose," Jack said to himself and went inside.

The lift rose swiftly up the side of the building, the glass sides giving a panoramic view of the city and spaceport, the planet's double suns starting to set. It was a spectacular view, but it was totally lost on him.

He listened at the door for a moment, but couldn't hear anything, and then with a shrug, he swiped the card across the reader at the side of the door and let himself in.

Lying in bed propped up with pillows, looking pale and exhausted, the pastel green of the bedding leeching what colour he had, was Ianto.

For a second Jack wondered if he was going to pass out as he swayed on his feet, shock and months of self-neglect threatening to overwhelm him. Shaking, his breath catching in his throat he caught hold of the door frame as he attempted to stay upright.

"I'm sorry it took so long."

Jack turned, still holding the edge of the door to see the Doctor standing to the side of him. "You! Why didn't you come?" Jack asked, a desperate appeal to understand in his eyes. "The Earth needed you. I needed you. Why?"

"I couldn't." The Doctor took a step back from him, feeling the tingle and burn of pent up regeneration energy beneath his skin. "You were part of it, you being there made it a fixed point. You know how those things are, you can't change them."

Jack looked at him hurt and so very, very tired. "So this is my fault?"

The burn got worse and the Doctor couldn't reply, having to focus all his attention and energy stalling his regeneration just a little bit longer.

"Doctor?" Jack asked, the anger rapidly being replaced with concern. "What wrong?"

"Nothing to worry about, I'm just going to regenerate soon. Well hopefully." He smiled, manic rather than hopeful, his own fears getting the better of him just for a moment. "I got a blast of radiation, so I'm not actually sure. I mean who knows, maybe I'll come back with two heads. At least I'd always be able to have an interesting conversation."

"You're dying?" Jack gripped the Doctor's forearms, staring at him shocked and scared.

"Isn't everyone really?" the Doctor replied flippantly, trying to sidestep that particular conversation.
"Don't joke." Jack voice cracked, as he pulled him into a hug. "Don't you even dare."

The Doctor smiled, looking like his hearts were breaking and then he pushed himself free of Jack's embrace. "I've got to go, things to do, places to go, people to see, you know me. Still a lot of universe out there I've not been to yet. "

"Don't, not when you're like this," Jack pleaded with him. "You shouldn't be alone, not if... I've never asked you for anything before, but please don't go."

"No, Jack." The Doctor put a hand on his shoulder. "You need to live and love and heal, and you don't need me for that. Any way who knows maybe one day we'll travel again. You and me we're both impossible, so that makes anything possible, doesn't it?"

Jack nodded, close to tears, knowing that he'd lost.

Then, without looking back, the Doctor walked away.

Jack saluted as he left, tears running down his face, until finally, as the door closed and the Doctor was out of sight he, dropped to his knees, hands covering his face.