Chapter 5: My Worst Nightmare

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Please review. Please.

Waking up, I found myself gasping for breath under water. I must have been in a lake, because when I swam up, I noticed that the gravel shore was close by. I waded over to shore, and began walking out into the forest that lay ahead of me. Green leaves floated in the wind, and willow trees hung low above me. I began limping across a brushed trail, hoping that it would lead me somewhere. I felt a pain that kept shooting up my leg as I limped across the trail.

"This sucks," I said to myself, "First I say a curse word in front of my cousin, and now I hurt my leg. Fantastic." I sighed, and sat next to a nearby willow. I had only walked about two or three hundred feet, but I was already tired. I glanced up, hoping to see the sky through the flying leaves and low hanging branches.

"You alright?" A voice called through the trees. I turned around, and stumbled up.

"Who's there?" I yelled. I will say I felt a bit of fear and anxiety at the time as a lone figure walked through the trees. A boy with a bowl cut and bushy eyebrows approached me.

"Rock Lee, at your service," he said flamboyantly. I frowned.

"I'm fine," I growled, "I don't need your help." I'll have it said, I hate Rock Lee. With baby animals that substitute for eyebrows, a jump suit that makes him look like a leprechaun, and a stupid bowl cut, this particular character was only made worse with his high pitched voice and annoying personality. I almost hated him as much as Naruto.

"Are you sure, Miss?" Lee asked, walking closer. The animals on his forehead were getting closer to me...And closer...and...

"BACK OFF YOU DRUNK, CHIPMUNK EYEBROW, LEPRECHAUN!" I screamed as I pushed Lee away from me. I don't think I was able to do much damage, though, because he stayed in the same place.

"I'm a drunk chipmunk?" he asked innocently. I started backing away from Lee.

"Uh, kinda, sorta, well...I better go!" I turned and dashed away from super eyebrows as he kept standing in the woods. My leg was in pain, so I slowed down to a limping jog, which is the equivalent to a couch potato trying to do a five kilometer run. I could hear Lee walking next to me.

"I won't allow someone to walk in the Konoha woods alone with such a terrible leg wound." Lee kept his eyes on me.

"Back off," I said in pain, "I can handle myself. I don't need to go to Konoha where that Sakura witch is waiting." I stopped walking and sat down on the ground. Lee sat next to me.

"I guess we have the same opinion, huh?" he said to no one in particular.

"What? The Sakura witch thing?" I glanced at Lee, then at the ground. I noticed blood was streaming from my right leg.

"She's a very evil woman," Lee replied, "She's taken to Naruto, but only because he's famous in Konoha. I offered her everything, even my life, but she dislikes me because I'm not a celebrity like Naruto."

"B**ch." I smiled, "Don't tell my cousin I said that, 'kay?"

"Your cousin?" Lee raised one of his eyebrows. I mean, one of his chipmunk babies.

"She's the best." I grinned, "But she doesn't like me cussing."

"Well, you shouldn't curse, then," Lee said, standing up. He pushed out his hand towards me, apparently to take my hand.

"What?" I asked. Lee pushed out his hand.

"Gimme your hand," he said, "So I can take you to Konoha."

"Fine," I complied, taking Lee's hand as he pulled me up. He lifted me up, piggy backing me. I sighed, a frown on my face as Lee began walking back along the trail.

"So," he said, trying to start a conversation, "Where did you come from, Miss?"

"Uh...another dimension, I guess," I said, "I came from California."

"Where's that?" Lee asked, apparently forgetting that I said I came from ANOTHER DIMENSION.

"West Coast." I replied, "In America."

"So...you're from the West?"

I sighed. He was stupider than I thought.

"Sure," I sighed, defeated, "That's where I'm from."

"America, huh? That's a strange name for a place, but it's quiet beautiful."

"Thanks."

"What's America like?"

I raised my eyebrows. How do I describe my home?

"It's filled with corrupt politicians, geniuses like Steven Hawking, border jumpers who aren't just Mexicans, fast food restaurants, annoying celebrities, military veterans who get no health care, and laws that only make sense to the rich. It has advanced technology, but it's made a lot of people undereducated and lazy."

"That...isn't exactly what I'd have imagined."

"Yeah...me neither. And it's all thanks to our lovely president, George W. 'I'm a traitor' Bush."

"What's a president?" Lee asked. I sighed, remembering that president's don't exist in the Naruto world.

"They're like Hokage's, but they rule over an entire country."

"An entire country?!" Lee exclaimed, "Isn't that a bit much?"

"That's why we have three branches of government. The Executive branch, the one the president belongs to, has to get the approval of the two other branches before he passes a law. At least, I think that's how it works. My school gives crappy education, so they won't be teaching me about my country until eight grade. Instead, I have to study other countries like China and Iraq. Then again, those countries will probably conquer us in the future if we don't shape up, so I probably shouldn't complain much."

"That's...disappointing," Lee added. A silence filled the forest.

"Do you...have any dreams?" Lee asked. I blinked.

"I...want to become president. I want to change my country, to make it at the top of the world, a power that will make other countries fear and bow down to us. I want to give my country the power to never be a laughing stock again. The power to make other countries the laughing stock, and the power to make sure the corrupt and rich never gain power unless they are fit to rule." I gripped Lee's shoulders.

"And I am the most fit to rule out of all of them," I added, "Because I am serious, devoted, and I will take my time into balancing our budget, not making technological advances."

"That's, um, very ambitious of you," Lee gulped. He stopped in front of a gate. He stepped forward, and waved to a guard who opened the gates. He walked, turned a corner, and stopped in front of a hospital.

"Are you dropping me off here?" I moaned. Lee nodded, walking into the hospital.

"The medical staff will know more than me here."

Lee handed me over to a medical ninja. Wait a second...this medical ninja has pink hair...

"Thanks, Lee," she said in a high pitched tone. Lee nodded as he walked out the door, a pitiful look on his face. He shrugged, and mouthed, "I'm sorry."

I looked up, seeing a green eyed witch with pale skin and pink hair. My mouth hung open, gaping as The Witch started taking me towards a medical room.

"It seems you have a cut muscle," The Witch commented, "What did you do? Jump on a sharp rock?"

"No," I growled. The Witch laughed her nasty cackle.

"Hah," she said, "I was just joking. You probably aren't that stupid."

"Probably?" I asked, my teeth gritted. The Witch smirked as she lay me down on a hospital bed.

"Well," she said, "You are a blonde. Like Ino Pig."

I began trembling in anger, my lips pursing. The Witch laughed, her shoulders shaking up and down.

"I was just joking," she laughed, "Like I do with all my patients."

My eyes widened in fear.

"You torture all your patients?"

The Witch frowned.

"Excuse me?" she asked in her snide voice. I tensed up.

"No." I said, my head shaking, "No. No. No. No. No."

I started to sit up, my body shaking in hysteria.

"Wait," The Witch warned, "You'll get yourself hurt and-"

"Oh heck NO!" I shrieked, trying to push The Witch back. Surprisingly, her chubby body hit the wall. I jumped off the medical bed, and sprinted out of the hospital room.

"There is no way I'm being taken care of by the Sakura Witch!" I screamed throughout the hospital halls. A few medical ninjas looked at me as they walked with patients. I ran, barely feeling any pain in my leg. I pushed the hospital door open, running out into the Konoha air. I swore I saw Ichuraku Ramen, but I wasn't sure as I ran towards the Hokage...building or palace, or whatever the heck it is. I started screaming, waving my arms.

"Help! Tsunade-sama! Help, the Sakura Witch is going to kill me!"

Villagers looked at me as a couple of ninja ran towards me. One of them had light blonde hair and blue eyes. Great, the Amazing Narutard. The other had deep red hair and teal eyes. Where was Chloe? Her boyfriend was here! Gaara and the Narutard, I think, Dang.

Gaara grabbed my hand as Naruto grasped my legs. They lifted me up as they began to walk into the Hokage's...building or office, I don't know, it's a fricken building.

"We need to report this woman to Granny Tsunade," Naruto said.

"I agree," Gaara said as he pushed open the Hokage's office. Tsunade was sitting at her desk, writing a few notes down on a piece of paper.

"Tsunade-sama," Gaara said, nodding to me, "We found the last crazy woman you were looking for."

"I'm not crazy!" I shouted, "I was just trying to get away from the Sakura witch!"

"That's my wife you're talking about," Naruto said. I looked up, my eyebrows raised.

"Listen, Narutard," I said, "You're just sayin' that so you don't get beat up by her meaty chop fists."

Naruto frowned, but Gaara nodded his head.

"Perhaps this woman is not as crazy as I believe," he said. Naruto sighed, and quieted down.

"I'm not a woman, either," I added, "I'm thirteen."

"What?" everyone exclaimed. I frowned.

"Yeah," I said, "I'm thirteen. A lot of people think I'm sixteen, though."

It was true. I was five foot one, yet everyone thought I was sixteen.

"That doesn't matter," Tsunade said, "Bring her to the other ones."

"Wait," I said, "Are you keeping my friends and cousin in prison? 'Cause if you are, Ms. Tsunade, I am not exactly going to be pleased with you."

I tried to sound as polite as possible, which I think worked in my favor.

"They're fine," Tsunade said, brushing me off as Gaara and Naruto led me into a separate room, where Brian was tossing his red coat up and down, Kastur was trying to read a Japanese comic, Yum Yum was asleep on a couch, Austin was eating some rice as he tried to work with chopsticks, Arabella and Arcadia were bickering about Dr. Who, and Chloe was looking out a window longingly. She looked back at me.

"Hey puppy," she cried, then blushing, said, "And...Gaara?"

I grinned as Gaara laid me down on a couch.

"You mean Gayra?" I added. Chloe frowned.

"Crona's a boy," she said, a grin on her face as I started spazzing.

"Crona is not a boy!" I shrieked, "He's genderless! GENDERLESS!"

Chloe smiled as I started spazzing. I glanced to the side, seeing Naruto looking at us strangely, and Gaara lauging softly. He had his eyes on Chloe.

Well, well, well, seems like a romance arc is gonna start soon, huh?

AUTHOR'S NOTES: For my cousin and my friends.