The next morning it was the same thing.
He wasn't ready to do that again.
He almost didn't go downstairs to the kitchen, worried that she was sitting there, and would continue to stare at him with those judging eyes.
Holding his breath, he swung the kitchen door open noiselessly, peeking around it to survey the scene.
No one was in the kitchen. Not a soul.
Breathing a sigh of relief, he padded into the room and headed for the carafe.
If he could just quickly go through his morning routine without running into her, he could get away and into the city do pick up some things, and by the time he got back, there would be more people at the house for the reunion weekend Serah had planned. Once there were more people at the house, it would be easier to avoid the older Farron, thereby saving him from any opportunity to stick his foot in his mouth and get his ass kicked.
He might have gone too far touching Serah like that in front of Lightning, but hell, Serah was his fiancee! If that didn't give him the right to be familiar and affectionate, then what did? Besides, the other shoe was going to drop this weekend when Serah made the announcement that she was pregnant.
The knowledge, however happy it might have been, was akin to a boulder in his stomach.
He wasn't much of a sprinter... so maybe he should pick up a personal force-field while he was in the city to save him from Lightning's wrath.
His jaw ached just thinking about it.
Lightning couldn't sleep in. Not since before she started working for the Sanctum when she was a teenager could she sleep in. Actually, the last time she'd slept in had been when her parents had been alive. Even more than that, she could easily say that she hadn't had a decent sleep in over a decade.
It didn't bother her to be up with the sun; she felt the best in the mornings.
Except lately.
Hope had saved her yesterday morning when they happened to meet in the hallway. She'd been itching to leave; just run and leave Serah and Snow and everything behind.
Serah wasn't hers anymore, Snow clearly staked his claim in the kitchen, and Serah seemed to be just fine with that. Kissing and canoodling with her right there watching them? Snow must have really missed her right hook.
After that display, Lightning was seriously tossing around the idea of leaving her little sister's company altogether and heading back to work.
Work needed her, her men needed her, Amodar needed her! Surely things were already going to hell in a hand-basket without her to keep things in line. She could just see Zack Fair with his feet on a stack of her personnel reports laughing stupidly, flirting shamelessly with a pretty secretary.
That had nearly been enough to convince her, but a conversation with Hope changed her mind. The fact that he was happy to see her and visit with her was written all over the kid's face, plastering some thick guilt on her to weigh her feet down.
It had been years since they'd last bonded; not even at their last visit had they really connected as before. She hadn't been able to see past the eyeliner, so that stopped her from being able to understand that Hope was still Hope no matter what. She'd realized that too late, and so the guilt wasn't completely fresh; most of it had been cooling on the back-burner.
It must have been apparent to Serah that Lightning was uncomfortable in the house, so last night at dinner, she'd offered directions to a point of interest in the wilds near the house. Hope suggested they go, and she accepted rather indifferently, but of course anything would be better than sitting around with people she had either grown apart from or didn't like.
Closing the door to her room, she slung her backpack over her shoulder and headed down to the foyer.
Hope was waiting for her downstairs.
Reaching out her hand to open the door, she was surprised when his beat her to it. With an arched brow, she glanced at him sideways to discover his small, hesitant smile as he drew it open for her.
Awkwardly stepping past the threshold, she figured there was a first time for everything.
Lightning was digging through the pack Hope had brought with him that contained their lunch.
She had been thankful for his quiet demeanour all morning, but she quickly came to realize, with every skritch of the stick in his hand tracing random lines through the dirt under their feet, that Hope must have had something to say. He obviously didn't know how to say it, but Lightning kept her mouth shut. She wasn't about to encourage something he was struggling with. If he wanted to broach it, then fine. Otherwise...
"So. Is.. uh... everything okay with you and Serah?" He asked, his voice like a gentle hand on her shoulder.
Tch.
So that's what it was; the last thing she wanted to talk about on a sunny summer day.
And just who did he think he was, asking her a question like that?
Who's business was it that she and Serah weren't getting along? Besides, surely it was old news by now, even to their youngest ex-l'cie friend.
She didn't have to answer to anyone; especially not some kid who had no idea what having a sibling meant, let alone what it meant to have to raise that sibling after your parents died.
Nora...
It had been years since the dead woman had crossed her mind.
Hope might not have had to raise a sibling like she had, but they had a great hurt in common.
She wondered if he still hurt.
Thrusting one last time into the shadow of the backpack, she finally felt the cellophane wrapped sandwiches. "Here." she said, pulling one out, tossing it easily to the silver-haired kid.
Dropping the stick abruptly in favour of a fumbling catch with both hands, she watched him grow young again. He was the gawky teenager and she was the revered adult. This type of relationship between them made her feel back in control; back in the driver's seat where she belonged.
They ate quietly in eachother's company, Hope on a near by tree stump, and as she chewed she couldn't stop her gaze from shifting in his direction.
He was overly focused on eating his plain lunch, eyes cast down toward it.
She hadn't said her thoughts out loud, but she felt a little guilty for them. She wasn't the only one that lost someone dear to her, but at least he still had someone left.
"Why did you come to Cocoon? I know you weren't visiting your father..."
Hope looked up at her, his expression revealing reined in panic. His lips parted, but he had no words for her.
"Look. I know Serah sent you to make sure I came." She said coolly, noting a miniscule change in her young friend's expression. "If she wanted me down here so damn bad, then she should have come herself. She shouldn't have put you in the middle."
"She didn't." He volunteered quickly.
Confusion creased her brow. "What do you mean 'she didn't'?"
"It wasn't Serah who asked me to meet you in Bodhum."
The hesitation in his voice was palpable, but he continued on.
"It was Snow."
She felt her eye twitch at the sound of that name.
That meddling bastard.
There was nothing she could really say that would be suitable for his ears, so she opted out, instead deciding to stuff her mouth with the last two bites of sandwich.
And obviously Hope knew when to leave well enough alone, because he didn't say anything further.
Even so, it felt like she was sitting on a knotted root leaving the conversation just float there. She had a lot to say, but she knew the boy and that lunkhead were friends as well. It would be unseemly to bitch to a kid that probably idolized him.
Standing stiffly, she fished a few squares of toilet paper from the pack, waving them informatively before she turned and stepped to the edge of the sitting area and into the brush.
Snow was what was wrong with her and Serah's relationship. If that bastard hadn't have come into her life, they'd still be sisters like they'd always been. Serah'd still be at home and working, making herself into a responsible young woman with a career instead of playing house with some lout who didn't deserve her.
Fuming the entire time she pissed, it only got worse as she made her way back. Slapping a whip-thin branch out of her path, she stomped past it angrily.
"I know that I'm probably not the best person for you to talk to about it, but..." Hope was standing right in front of her when she reemerged into the clearing. Inertia carried her too quickly, and she had to really put on the brakes in order not to crash into him. He stood only a handful of feet away, holding a little sunshine yellow flower, all pretty petals with a dark centre, in his hand.
What the hell...?
"I learned a lot from this cool chick I met a few years ago... and she helped me out a lot when I needed it."
Closing the distance between them, standing closer to her than he'd ever been since they met in Bodhum, Lightning was able to experience how tall Hope had grown over the years.
He had a few inches on her easily.
Lightning felt Hope tuck the cheery stem behind her ear, the side of his finger brushing over her earlobe, his voice a little shaky and a little higher pitched than normal.
"I was hoping that I might be able to help her out this time."
A moment lingered between them before he took a couple of large steps backward. She studied him, her anger draining from her body and out her feet as she watched his evolving expression. He'd started out looking a little along the confident side, but the more time she let pass the more apprehensive he looked and eventually she shrugged nonchalantly.
Unsure if she really wanted to talk to him about any of it, his air of openness appealed to her need to just get it out, and she was surprised how easily the words came.
"Things haven't gone well for a very long time." She admitted.
Flabbergasted that she was caught completely off-guard for the second time in less than half a day and by a kid, she was even more confused that she wasn't able to stop the staccato explanation of her side of the story.
No, not a kid. Not anymore. If anything attested to that, it was the little flutter in her gut she tried to suppress.
She hadn't meant to keep him on the ropes like she did, but either his kindness or his forwardness had shocked her a little, keeping her on the ropes instead.
First time for everything indeed.