This chapter is dedicated to Crackalive. Without your encouragement and praise, I would have abandoned this fic a long time ago! :)

Thank you.

"Sasuke… Sasuke…Sasuke…"

You're in a long corridor, dimly lit by dull torches. There's a voice, gentle and sweet, repeating your name over and over. You immediately recognise it. How can you not? You look around wildly, your heart beating erratically with barely contained hope. It's been a while since you dreamed your mother alive. She's always a corpse in your dreams; unnaturally bend, surrounded by puddles and puddles of blood.

You spot her at the end of the corridor. She glows slightly with eerie light, her black eyes staring at you, her face a mask of motherly concern. You feel your lips form a smile and you start running towards her. You can't wait to hug her. Even if it's just a dream, it's still a good enough presentation of your mother.

'Sasuke...' She says again. 'Sasuke...'

'Mum?' You ask, still running. You notice that you're not getting closer. You look over your shoulder and you see that you're further then where you were standing before, but you're not closer to your mother. You look back at her, and she's still staring ahead, but not at you. In your excitement you haven't noticed the sightless way her eyes stare ahead. There's definitely concern on her face, but she's not present. She's just a manifestation of your dreams. Probably taken from a memory. 'Mum?' You ask again.

'Sasuke...'

'Can you hear me?' You ask.

'Sasuke...'

'Answer me!'

Your scream echoes around you, bouncing off the walls. You start when her eyes snap towards you. It's so sudden and sharp that it catches you completely off guard.

'Mum?' You question, hardly daring to hope.

'Sasuke...' She whispers, face softening. 'My baby...'

Your feet move before your brain truly registers her words.

Her look of horror, however, stops you.

'Run!' She screams, face pale with horror. 'Run before he catches you!'

You look around. 'Who will catch me? There's no one here.'

'Run!' She repeats. 'Run before—' She chokes and you watch, sickened, as blood starts to dribble from the corner of her mouth and down her chin. 'He—' She chokes again, doubling over. Her arms wrap around her middle tightly and she starts to cough harshly, thin shoulders shaking with the effort it required.

You feel scared. 'Mum, what's going on?'

'Run!' She screams again. She looked up and you reel back. Her eyes are bloodshot, her face is ashen, and her chin is covered in blood. You can spot the bright red in her clothes, somewhere around her stomach or chest. You realise she's bleeding, and it's serious.

'Mum!' You start running again. You don't care this is a dream. You're not about to let her die, knowing you can stop it. 'Hold on! I'm going to help you.'

'No!' The scream is wild and piercing, but also commanding. You stop in your tracks, unused to hearing this tone from your mother. She falls to her knees, still hugging herself, and looks up at you pleadingly. 'You have to run, Sasuke.' She says faintly, her voice suddenly muffled by something, as if there is an invisible wall between you two. 'You have to live.'

'But— but... what about you?'

She smiles sadly. 'I'm dead.'

A figure suddenly appears beside your mother's collapsed figure. He's tall, his greyish hair pulled back in a ponytail. His glasses flash in the darkness as he turns to look at you.

'No!' You yell, anger and fear bubbling inside you. 'Not you! Get away from her!'

He doesn't listen to you. He turns his attention on your mother, looking down at her with a smirk. 'Such a pity, really.' He says softly, raising a gun to her head.

You pump more strength in your legs. 'No! Don't you dare!'

'An unnecessary victim.' Kabuto adds. 'Mikoto-san, you should have gone home.' And then he pulls the trigger.

A horrifying, blood-curdling roar ripples through your chest and past your lips. You watch as your mother falls to the ground without as much as a sound, her face hidden by the dark curtains of her hair. You turn to Kabuto. 'I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.'

The monster has the nerve to laugh.

'Run, little Sasuke.' He croons. 'Run before I catch you.'

...

You shot up straight, sweating and panting. You stare ahead sightlessly, listening to your heartbeat in your ears. It takes several moments for you to regain control over your breathing and realise you're not in your own bed. You recognise the feminine, floral pattern of the duvet you're wrapped in and look beside you. You see nothing. You look around and jump when you spot Sakura curled up on the armchair beside the bed, staring right at you. She's wrapped in a blanket, but you can see her shuddering slightly beneath it.

'Sakura?' You ask, confused. You look around for confirmation. Yes, you're in her room, and yes, it is night. Why? This is a question you'll need to think about more to come up with the answer.

'We were watching The Dark Knight Rises.' Sakura tells you. 'But you fell asleep. Right when Bane was trashing Bruce, by the way. I'm not going to tell Naruto if you make me pancakes for breakfast later.'

'Why didn't you wake me up?' You ask, running a hand through your damp hair. You're covered in cold sweat and your hands shake slightly, but for the most part, you've managed to regain control.

'You looked like you needed it.' Sakura tells you softly, looking at you with concern. 'You always look so tired.' She cocks her head to the side, and you notice her hair has stuck to her skin. She's sweating, too, and you're sure it's not because she was having a nightmare. 'How often do you have nightmares like this one?'

You pull the blankets off you and climb off the bed. 'Get in bed.' You order. 'You're still sick. Will you think about yourself once in a while?'

'I'm fine.' She protests, pulling the blanket closer around herself. 'See, perfectly fine.'

'Sakura, you're sweating.' You point out. 'And I saw you shudder. How high is your temperature?'

'It's the blanket!' She exclaims, pushing the blanket off her. Her body betrays her as she lets out an involuntary shudder. She deflates as realises there's no way she's going to win against you, especially after this. 'I took my medicine a few minutes ago.' She mumbles as she stands up, dropping the blanket on the armchair. She crawls on her bed and slips under the blankets. 'It'll take a while before it works.'

'You're stupid.' You tell her. You spot your phone on her bedside table and grab it. You check for any messages or missed calls by Itachi.

'I called Itachi to tell him you're spending the night here.' Sakura tells you. 'He wasn't happy, said you were going to have a talk about sleeping over on school nights.'

You scoff as you grab the blanket and sit down on the armchair. You're sick of Itachi and his attempts at controlling you.

'He's just worried about you.' Sakura says, correctly interpreting your scoff. 'It's normal, after everything that's happened. You shouldn't be so hard on him. He lost them, too, you know.'

'I know that.' You say shortly.

'It doesn't seem like it sometimes.' You look at her sharply, but she doesn't relent. 'It's true. You don't listen to him at all, even though he has your best interest in heart. You know it, too. This is some sort of vengeance against him, isn't it? But for what? What did he do to make you so unforgiving towards him?'

'I don't want to talk about this.' You say tiredly, closing your eyes.

'I want to talk about it.' You open your eyes, looking at her in surprise for the bold statement. She sits up and wraps the duvet around herself. 'I want you to tell me. I want you to share this with me. You need to share this burden with someone, Sasuke. Otherwise, it'd consume you.'

'You're sick, Sakura.' You tell her dismissively. 'You need to sleep, not listen to my problems.'

'I'm fine!' She insists. 'The medicine is starting to kick in. Besides, I do want to listen to your problems and no pesky food poisoning will stop me from it. You need this.'

'Will you stop assuming things about me?' You ask with a scowl. 'Maybe I don't need this. Maybe you're just shoving your nose where it doesn't belong.'

Her lips purse slightly, but this is the only indication of hurt she shows you. 'This time it's not going to work. You try to push me and Naruto away every time we broach the subject. You insult us, you hurt us. Do you realise what you're actually doing? You're lucky we're still your friends, Sasuke. Your attitude is awful sometimes.'

Your eyes widen as you stare at her and her serious expression. Her eyes soften as she looks at you, but that doesn't stop you from feeling guilt and hurt pool in your stomach. 'We still love you.' She says gently. 'We'll love you no matter what. That's why we want you to share this with us. We're your best friends. We care deeply about you and your problems.'

You contemplate this. You've had this conversation with her and Naruto a lot. They always tell you how much they love you, how much you mean to them, and that they are ready to hear every gritty detail of your problems. You've never actually thought of telling them. You listen to them rant, but you dismiss them. You often think they'll never get how you feel. They'll never understand because they've never lost someone close to them. What better will it do if you tell them how you feel? Will that get your parents back?

You haven't fully realised that up until now, you've associated happiness and peace with seeing your parents again. You feel like, if they're not there with you, you'll never feel happy. You'll be all right, but you won't be happy. You'll get by, but you won't feel any particular joy about your existence.

But now, as you look at Sakura's earnest, hopeful eyes, you realise that his isn't true anymore. Somehow, in the course of the past few weeks, Sakura has done something your brother and Naruto haven't managed in months; she's finally gotten through you.

And the most disturbing thing of all is... you don't mind.

'I...' You take a deep breath. Sakura gives you an encouraging look. 'Well... I'm not sure from where to start.' You look down at your hands. You don't think you'll be able to look at Sakura as you tell her this. You're sure that she'll cry. 'It was just... a shock. There really is no way to explain it. One moment I had my parents, and the next, I didn't. For the longest time I blamed myself. I don't know why. I know I couldn't have done anything. I was at school. I couldn't have done anything to prevent it.'

'And then I was just angry. I was angry at them for dying. I was angry at him for killing them. I was angry at my brother for continuing with his life while I could barely find the strength to get up in the morning. I was angry at you and Naruto for being so understanding, for being so damn nice and for being so damn loving. Every warm gesture made me angry. It was irrational, I know. It's not your fault at all. But I didn't care for your understanding, or your love. I just wanted my parents, and I was angry that I couldn't have them back.'

'And then I started thinking about how much I always disappointed my father. How I was never good enough. How I never managed to gain his full approval. How I never got to say to my mother how much I love her. How much I appreciated her attempts to make me feel as loved and special as Father made Itachi feel. I never got to tell her that she's the person I love the most in the world. And then—' You hear sniffing and you just know tears are streaming like a waterfall down her cheeks. But you continue determinately. If you look up, you'll lose your nerve. '—and then I started thinking 'what if I had one more day with them?' I'd tell them everything. I'd tell my mother everything I wanted to tell her. I'd ask my father why; why was I never enough for him. What could I have done to make him proud of me? Could I have done anything to make him feel proud of me? I started imagining this day with them, and it made me feel better for a while, if just marginally.'

You smile bitterly as you speak again. 'But then I realised this day isn't coming. My parents are dead. In the real world, people stay dead and they don't come back. No matter how much you beg, cry, scream and plead. I couldn't have this day with them. I'd never get tell my mother, I'd never get to ask my father. It was when the harsh reality of the situation kicked in. It was when I realised that I'd never see them again. It truly sunk in that I'd never see my mother's smiling face, or never here my father's almost praise. Of course, I knew that before, but it was in that moment that I finally realised the meaning of death.'

'That is when everything lost meaning. I'd be lying if I said I never contemplated taking my own life. But I quickly shut that down. I didn't want to disappoint my mother. Taking my own life was the easy way out, and I knew she wouldn't approve. So, I tried to live. I'm sure you noticed that I wasn't very successful. Every day was the same to me. I felt this emptiness inside me and it really seemed like nothing will ever be able to feel that void they left in me. You and Naruto proved to be the only distractions from the monotony of my own prison of pain and hatred. You two never gave up. You insisted to stay. You fought viciously against all of my attempts to push you away. And finally, I gave up. I let you.'

'I didn't, and still don't, like to admit that I need you. You are probably the reasons I still cling to life, beside the thought of my mother's disapproval. You are the two most alive people I know, and your energy and love of life is what makes me hope that things might get better one day.'

'Two weeks ago...' Your hands tighten into fists at the mere thought of that day. 'I went to see their killer.'

'You did what?' She yelps.

'I went to see him. I wanted answers. Why did he do it? Did he regret it?' You grit your teeth. 'He doesn't. He doesn't regret it and he probably never will. But what hurt the most wasn't his complete ruthlessness. It was his admission that if my parents hadn't been in dad's office that day, they wouldn't have died. He hadn't gone there with the intention of killing them specifically. But he killed them anyway. He had his reasons. My father was too power hungry, my mother persecuted him a few years ago and probably never let the case go. She never did when she felt justice hadn't been appropriately served. All this time I thought he had killed them for a reason, and when it turned out that they were dead just because they were there in the wrong place at the wrong time... well, I snapped.'

Sakura gasps. 'This is why you were being so... moody.'

You snort. 'Always so tactful, Sakura. You can say I was being a dick. Because I was and I didn't care all that much. You see, I have this problem of indulging in my pain without regard for other people's feelings. I used to justify it with my parents' death, but with time I realised that other people have lost their parents too, and I was just being an asshole because I could.'

'But you went through so much! Surely, you're allowed to act like this once in a while.' You finally look up. Her eyes a little pink but she isn't crying. Instead, she's looking at you with fervent light in her eyes. 'What you learned is horrible, Sasuke. What this man did to your parents is horrible. He's a terrible, disgusting human being for taking their lives just because he could do it.'

'I know that. This is what you and Naruto just don't get, Sakura. I know everything you tell me but compared to my loss? It doesn't matter at all. Rational thoughts don't matter when you're grieving. Logic fails when faced with your pain. I can't just tell myself 'things are going to get better' and automatically believe it. It'll take time, probably a lot of time, for me to fully recover, if I ever do.'

'I want you and Naruto to understand that. I might never be the same person I was before they died. In fact, I'm sure I'll never be. This has changed me. Radically. And now is my turn to ask you this... can you accept it?'

Sakura stares at you quietly for several moments. You can see the gears in her head working, so you don't speak or bother her. Instead, you shift to make yourself more comfortable and wrap the blanket around your shoulders.

'Sasuke...' Her exasperated voice makes you look at her. She looks at you like she wants to be angry, but just can't bring herself to. 'You're so stupid sometimes, you know that?'

'Huh?' You don't see anything stupid about what you've said. It is a valid question. Sakura has to come to terms with the fact that you'll never be the same. She can't cling to hope that you might return to the person you were one day.

Sakura shakes her head, looking truly amazed. 'Do you really don't see it?'

'What?' You snap, starting to get irritated.

She giggles lightly and shakes her head again. 'I should be angry but you're just so clueless.' She composes herself and looks at you seriously. 'Sasuke, I love you. I've loved you since you tripped Suigetsu after he kicked that ball that hit me and never apologised. And this is not the kind of love that just goes away. No.' She shakes her head. 'We were friends before I fell in love with you, and that makes my feelings stronger than you seem to think. It's not some silly teenage crush. I truly am in love with you. And I'll stay by you no matter what. I don't want you to change. I love you the way you are. I accept your every flaw. I accept that things are not going to be easy, that you've gone through a lot. I get it and I accept it. I accept you. I love you.' She smiles gently. 'And there's nothing you or anyone else can say or do to change that.'

You gape at her, completely speechless. You take in several breaths before speaking. 'Sakura...I...'

'You don't have to say anything.' She says hastily. 'I didn't tell you this expecting you to confess your undying love to me. I told you because I wanted you to be aware of how I felt, and that I'll never leave you, no matter what.'

'Uh...' You still feel overwhelmed by this. You've never thought her feelings are this deep. But you're grateful. Grateful that she can see past your mask and care enough to break through your walls. You care deeply for her, as well. You might even love her.

But for now, you can't give her what she wants. You're not yet healed enough to make her happy.

So instead of telling her how you feel, you just mumble a quiet thank you.

You can't help but hope she'll feel this way once you finally feel whole enough to function normally. You don't want to lose her.