Heeey! :D I surprisingly had less writer's block with this than any of the others. Took me longer to update but that was becos I was lazy teehee. This chapter might be a breakthrough for Mikan as she learns to accept things the way they are finally letting down her walls! She's not confident, but is still very much determined. I'm thinking about another story plot already! I'm not sure it'll go tho..ohwell! Hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: ecognizable-Ray aracters-chay om-fray akuen-Gay Alice-ay elong-bay o-tay e-may! (Pig Latin is so fun!)

Ch. 11

A wave of nausea and the reality struck me as I recalled mom telling me the truth. Youichi was quiet, solemnly looking at nothing in particular. Mom's unnerved smile still plastered on her face annoyed me even more. I turned my gaze at Arata who froze, "What?" I hissed.

I turned on my heel to get out the house before I..I break something. "Mikan Yukihara Sakura." Mom said in a stern voice, "Where are you going?"

I stopped and faced her, "What'd you expect from me? To be giddy for you?" That smile came back on her face, what was she so happy about?

"Of course! Mikan, you're going to have a little brother and a father!" She said, rushing over to me. I noticed as she came closer that she did in fact get bigger. Her flat stomach which I used to envy was gone and replaced was a belly, a big one.

I scoffed, "What's wrong with you? I already have a dad." I broke the grip she had on my shoulders and stepped back, "I thought you loved dad and I was only a year old, but you actually had an affair?" her smile fell. My back was now facing her, "When they called you whore, home-wrecker, tramp, or escort behind your back, I would always ignore it. Got into fights becos of it."

"Mikan.." her voice ran a chill on my spine. "I didn't believe it becos you're my mother and I am your daughter. I tolerated all the bullshit thrown at me because you're my mom but now..now I don't know what to believe anymore." I started towards my car overwhelmed with these pathetic, self-pity feelings.

The memories of me, mom, dad, and Youichi together and happy came swirling back. As I pulled in to the afternoon rush hour, my head swelled with all these memories of our happiness that were in vain. Red and yellow lights zoomed pass like the minutes of the hour.

The depressed phase subsided but it then grew into anger. I was only a year old when mom had that stupid affair. Dad acted as if everything was okay from the get-go and played along with Mom's lie until the day he died. I was told countless lies and looked like an idiot for believing them. "Meet your new baby brother Youichi!" he said the day he brought Youichi home. I was two years old when I met the little alien-looking baby. Dad had the biggest smile on his face, he looked so happy. "Where's momma?" I asked him. He looked at me like it was a difficult question.

"Uh..she's still in the hospital. She'll come home later though. Come say hi to your brother Mikan-chan!" he reverted his attention back to the alien, cooing and making silly sounds.

"How could I have not known?" I asked myself, cruising around the streets of Tokyo. My phone started vibrating, "Yeah?" I said weary.

"I'm at school, where are you?" Hotaru's voice droned. I snapped back to reality checking the time: 3:13 p.m. School was over long ago. "I'm on my way." I said.

I was actually nearby since I arrived at school in five minutes. I saw Hotaru near the office, "Hotaru!" I screamed. It was the first time I saw her after so long. Her hair was, of course, cropped short, her porcelain skin remained and her eyes were still stoic. She was the same and I was okay with it.

I ran over to hug her when she lifted her hand to stop me. Her purple eyes scanned me up, down, left, right. Then a little smirk appeared on her face making me blush in the process. "Let's go get something to eat."

We went to our favorite hang out spot, 7-Eleven. We'd buy our slurpees and junk food then sit on the hood of my car talking about whatever comes to mind. It was our own little haven. "Wow. Wasn't expecting that." she said after I told her what happened.

"I didn't either." I replied, another sip from my blue slurpee. "What are you gonna do now?"

"Well I don't wanna go home, can I stay at your place?" I asked her with big, brown puppy eyes. I even pouted my lips.

"No." she deadpanned. "I don't want a snot-nose idiot ruining my sleep."

I laughed, she really was the same Hotaru. We continued to sit in front of 7-Eleven sipping our slurpees and eating nachos. It felt like the good ol days. We talked about mom, Natsume, how her life was back in America, everything.

After dropping Hotaru off, I went to the park to get some air and gather my thoughts. The sun was setting making the sky orange-pink. There was a faint smell of barbecue as I sat down on a bench, watching a family joyfully play soccer. Screaming, laughing as they have a friendly match.

I inhaled then exhaled remembering what happened at home. "He's Youichi's father too." mom's silk voice rang in my ears. I pulled my knees closer to me and buried my face deep into my arms, irritation and bitterness rising again. "I'm pregnant and Arata's the father, he's also Youichi's father." It kept repeating over and over in my head. I wanted to ask Dad so many questions. Why did you lie? Why did you pretend everything was okay when Mom was seeing another man? Why were you smiling as if nothing happened? Dad..what really happened?

I looked back at the sky, night loomed. "Dad, were you really happy?"

;p

"Ew, you look like you got hit by a train." Hotaru said at lunch. My eyes were swollen and there were bags under my eyes. My back was stiff and my arms were sore. I didn't go home last night so I slept in my car, going straight to school this morning. "Gee. Thanks." the sarcasm automatic.

I saw Sumire walking towards the bathroom. "Su-" I stopped noticing she was talking to someone. She looked around and proceeded to walk into the bathroom with the girl. I got up and headed over there. I cracked the door opened and heard the familiar shrill voice, "You got any more pictures of that low-class trash?"

"No.." Sumire replied meekly.

"Do you know what's been going with her lately?" Luna asked.

There was a hesitant pause, "Her mom came back yesterday." I heard Luna's overbearing laugh, "Aw that's cute, the whore family is together again."

This time I heard Sumire snicker. My heart sank, I really couldn't believe came to me, like an epiphany. Sumire betrayed me. She betrayed me. She took that picture of me and Natsume, she was the one dropping hints to Luna about everything. I sat back down next to Hotaru still trying to understand what was going on. "She betrayed me." I whispered. Hotaru looked at me, chewing on her sandwich, "What?"

"Sumire..stabbed me in the fucking back!" I shrieked. Hotaru stopped chewing and looked over at the bathroom, "That bitch." She muttered. Hotaru and Sumire were never on good terms, I was the one in the middle who would try to calm them down but not this time.

She got up and literally stomped towards the bathroom, throwing the door wide open it shocked all three of us. "Hotaru.." Sumire stared wide-eyed.

"Imai?" Luna said. When she saw me behind Hotaru, her face turned sour. "Sakura." She spat, pulling out her MAC foundation and patting a circular pad around her eye where a really visible blue-ish circle was.

"What the hell are you doing Shouda?" Hotaru hissed, planting her hands on her hips.

Sumire, in turn, scrutinized at Hotaru, "It's obviously none of your business Imai."

"Manifesting Mikan's life is, of course, my business. I thought we were friends." she stated, now crossing her arms in front of her chest. Sumire didn't say anything but kept looking at Hotaru.

"Tsk tsk." Luna said, shaking her head. We all looked at her, "Who would wanna be friends with someone pathetic?"

"If she's so pathetic then why take the time out of your precious day to even acknowledge her existence?" Hotaru retorted. Luna looked taken aback while I felt kind of insulted. "The only person who's pathetic is you, Koizumi."

The atmosphere was thick with silence. The chatter of other people was heard behind the closed door to the bathroom. I honestly thought Luna was going to lunge at Hotaru but she quietly left the bathroom, face beet red. It was only me, Hotaru and Sumire now.

"Why did you do it?" I asked her, finally speaking. Her face looked annoyed as she sneered at me, "It's simple. I don't like you, I never did." She crossed her arms, "I don't get it, why did Ruka like you? Why does Natsume even bother with you? Why did all the guys I liked like you more? It's stupid how they like you more than me."

Her words punched me in the stomach and knocked all the wind out of me. It felt like her words were beating the crap outta me, "But you knew what Ruka did to me." I whispered.

"Yeah, so what? What if I knew that was gonna happen before you did? You don't deserve him." she spat.

That one was a slap, "Wait..you knew it was gonna happen?" I paused, "Did you plan that with Luna too?" My heart rate increased, dreading the answer.

She grinned, "You're a wretched person Mikan. You never cared about my feelings so why should I care about yours?"

"You're such a petty person Shouda." Hotaru intervened. Sumire uncrossed her arms and looked defiantly at her, "And? You knew all along I was like this." she looked at me, "Someone else was just too naïve." Slap slap slap. Her words, like venom, just kept mentally slapping me.

"You're acting like this just cos guys liked me instead?" I finally said, her attention now on me "Caddy." She twitched. I looked at her, "You're a caddy girl Sumire. Maybe I was foolish to believe we were actually friends but I didn't do anything to make those guys like me." She turned her back to me but I kept going, "You were 'friends' with me since freshmen year, you should know by now that I could care less about them. You know how I felt about Ruka and especially about my mom. Pretending to care, pretending you gave a damn about me is lower than low. You're a fake, caddy girl Sumire." It came out like word vomit. My mind was spinning after leaving the bathroom. My heart was racing after hearing Sumire's ultimatum. If things got worse, I really wouldn't know what to do anymore.

;p

I ended up ditching 6th period, Mrs. Tanaka wouldn't mind and I needed to sleep really bad. I was in the nurse's room trying to sleep but was wide awake becos Nurse Ayama was talking oh-so-loudly on the phone. "It's an important phone call!" she said after I asked her to quiet it down the first few times. I pulled the covers over my head and rested my head under the pillow trying to nullify the sound of her voice.

"Get up." a muffled voice said. The blanket was pulled off me, feeling a rush of cold air, and the pillow lifted up seeing Natsume's face. I groaned reaching for the blanket but he caught my wrist before I could. "Get up." he said again. I couldn't even get up, he ended up dragging me to who knows where this time.

"That hurts." I said once we got to the back courtyard. He stopped and looked at me, anger seething through his glare. "What's wrong?" I asked looking away, suddenly feeling self-concious.

He sighed, "I want to know...what's going on between us."

My heart skipped, "Wh-What do you mean?" I looked into his eyes, big mistake.

"What are we?" He stepped closer, "I like you, you like me."

I groaned, there were too many problems being thrown at me, "Do we have to put a label on it?"

He scrutinized me, "I just wanna know where I stand in your life. You're always leaving me clueless." I finally broke free from his gaze but he lifted my chin to make me look at him again. "I'm always running back and forth, trying to figure you out. I lose my cool and ended up looking like a crazy stalker. I wanna know where I stand so I won't lose whatever left of my mind there is."

Those heart tremors began again, butterflies raging in my gut, "Things right now..they're complicated."

"Your mom?" he asked. "Yeah." I said not surprised he knew. I still wasn't sure whether I should tell him, but right now, it just seemed right.

"I found out that..she cheated on my dad two years after I was born. Youichi is my half-brother and I'm about to get another half-brother. And Ruka...he's a jerk who cheated on me, don't worry about him." I gave a small smile. He was quiet, I felt even more self-conscious. "Sorry." I reached and took his warm hand, "I'm not sure about my life right now but just know that I do like you, and whatever happens don't stalk me." He smiled. He pulled me in for a hug. A warm, comforting, genuine hug. I wish time would freeze right now, the sorrow and worries leaving me as this guy, who took over my heart like a storm, made me feel more than better. He let me feel happiness, a feeling that left me a long time ago.

;p

I had to go home eventually. After spending a day with Natsume, I realized if I want things to be resolved, I had to face them head on, no regrets. I pulled up to the drive way, the living room light was on showing the silhouettes of mom and Arata. Youichi must be sleeping.

I lightweight fought with myself whether or not to go back in but evidently jammed the key in, twisting the door knob and opening it up to see mom's face was streaked with tears, her eyes were swollen, the tip of her nose was slightly red as she held a tissue against it. Arata was trying to console her, but apparently it didn't work. "Mikan..." she said, sobbing a little more.