Chapter 11: Three Little Words

The wind rushing past her blows incessantly in her ears, muting the screaming that she otherwise would be hearing. She can still feel his hands on her arms, lifting her and spinning her through the air. She can see his joyful expression, his ignorant and obvious bliss at seeing her.

It stings. His handprints smart like a thousand needles, his laughter shoots pain through her mind, his bright eyes burn into her, going deeper and deeper and eventually squeezing something deep inside of her until it pops.

What is he thinking?

Her vision blurs and she allows her feet to carry her down familiar pathways, trusting people to run out of her way. Something rumbles near her, but reason has left her mind and she doesn't care what type of thing could be bearing down on her. All she can think is run. Get out of there. Get away from him. Maybe the pain will stop if she does.

Something wet and cold drops on her head and she halts, looking upwards. All around her people run into their buildings or pull out umbrellas as the rain begins to drip down from the gathering grey clouds. The storms from last night don't seem to be over, or at least they have some straggling rain clouds hanging behind them.

She shivers, suddenly realizing how tired and cold she is. She searches around, looking for a place to shelter, but eventually just settles down on a bench, rain dripping onto her from the leaves of the tree above. The warm restaurants and shops hold no interest for her at the moment. Their cheery and inviting atmosphere only seems to mock her, giving her a glimpse of what life could be like if only she would change her mind, give up…

Her face falls into her hands. Why had any of this happened? Why had everything gone wrong? Had she done something? Had he? What was it? When did they go down a road that would lead to sorrow?

She tried to keep in touch. Is that it? She wouldn't give up on something already dead and gone? She got angry with him. She ruined something perfect? No, it isn't any of those. Everything started way before, with a simple choice, one that seemed so obvious.

She had said those words. Those three simple words ruined everything. They took something simple and sweet and eternal and made it complicated, intense, heartbreaking. Their friendship could've lasted forever. It was the classic childhood story. Neighbors all through life; never lose touch. It would have been nice. It would have been easy.

But it wasn't. It isn't. It's difficult and confusing and makes absolutely no sense. It flared, it died, and they poked the ashes half-heartedly. But after all that he still shows up here? Embracing her like nothing happened?

Everything had happened. Everything had gone wrong. All because of three little words.

Those three words.

She wishes she could regret them, but she can't. Because even after all of this…

After everything, they're still true.

No matter what, she still loves him.

There's a wet squishing sound as someone sits down next to her, their breathing heavy and loud. She stares blankly ahead around the edges of her knees pulled to her chest, the legs of her jeans soaked through with water. Something warm and dry is draped across her shoulders and a smell of spice and musk wafts over her, making her dizzy with memory. The fur around the neckline tickles at her cheeks and she sighs, forcing herself to stay silent.

"I was hoping for a slightly warmer reception." Pain shoots through her at the sound of his voice, her teeth digging into her lip. No other words are said for a moment, the rain just patters down around them, growing more insistent every second. He shifts next to her, a boot clad foot coming into view beyond her knees. The boot has a partner. They're attached to legs. Legs go upwards, meet the chest. At the top is a head, covered in sopping violet hair falling out of a messy half-bun. Ice blue eyes, different from her own deep warm cerulean. They stare nonjudgmentally at her and she can see herself reflected in them, wet and disheveled, curled into a pathetic ball on a bench.

His hand moves the tiniest bit, but quickly stops itself and compresses into a fist. "Hey," his voice is quiet, empty of his usually smartass tone. "Are you alright?"

A leaf detaches itself from the three above them and flutters downward. She watches as it falls into the street and is carried by a stream of water into the drain to disappear underground. A shiver goes through her again, but doesn't stop after one pass through her body. Instead it reverberates again and again, picking up in the small corners of her fingers and toes and amplifying back into her stomach, her head, like a never ending echo.

It doesn't fix anything. Feelings don't change anything. She can love him as much as she wants, but nothing will really come of it. They hurt each other. Every second the thought of one passes through the other's mind it's painful.

"No." her voice cracks on the single syllable.

He sighs, turning to face the street again. "I didn't think so." Silence reigns once more, begging to be broken but showing no way to do so. Her fingernails dig into her legs, pulling them closer to her. Beside her, he says something, but his words sound distorted, as if she's underwater.

A gust of wind sends her wet hair flying around her and a hand grabs her arm, feeling like the burn of a hot oven. She stares back with frantic eyes, but he just tugs insistently, standing up. "Go…somewhere…heavier…" His voice is hard to understand with the rush of wind and water all around, but she gets what he means. Go somewhere safer? Why? She feels herself sink further into the wood seat. The storm has picked up and cold rain pricks at her skin. Something about the setting seems fitting, not comfortable, in fact quite the opposite, but altogether Luka could appreciate the way the trees strain with the gusts and the rain pelts the street in sheets.

Another hand grabs her other arm and lifts her off the bench, towing her down the street hastily. They reach an awning of a café and he reaches over, pulling the hood of his coat over her head, before beginning sprinting again.

He pulls her down street after street, sheltering under trees and dodging cars, until the streets look familiar. She bleakly notices the University gates go by and that they're on campus. Still he pulls her through the roads, across the parking lot, and up stairs to the third floor. He stops at the door, looking at her expectantly.

The door clicks as she turns the key, opening into her dorm, dark with drawn curtains. She stands in the doorway, dully looking around. His voice is next to her ear, urging her forward, and she steps in, but feels the air still moving with the current of outside behind her. A glance around reveals that he hasn't stepped in, but is just holding the door awkwardly. There was a time when he would have barged in without preamble, sometimes catching her while she was dressing and earning a smack across the face. But now, to just waltz into her room with invitation…

She steps aside and turns slightly, gesturing into the room with hands that feel like lead. With a ringing of his soaked clothing he steps inside and the door closes, plunging the room into semi-darkness.

He looks at her as if meaning to say something, but inside his gaze eventually wanders over the walls, the furniture, the windows, nostalgia reflecting in his eyes. Strange tingles go up and down her spine and she wants to move, but is afraid to step off the tilted section of the entrance and ruin her carpet. She bites her lip, feeling some sort of vitality pour back into her, and folds her arms.

"What…" her voice is the tiniest croak. "What are you doing here?"

A/N: Two more chapters! I actually just finished writing the thing and I am SOOOOOO happy. It's finally off my back! I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Ahem, so yeah. Two more chapters. I'm gonna go write something new now...