Who's been keeping up to date with the manga? If you have then OMFG! I won't spoil anything just in case, but :'((((( - you know it's bad when it's a double chin attack! Le sigh~ Anyways, hope you like this chapter! :) I was going to make it longer, but I honestly had no idea what to write. No worries though, when I get that epiphany, I will write like there's no tomorrow! ;D

Disclaimer: The story is completely mine! The characters belong to the great Higuchi Tachibana.

Chapter 13.

Spilling my guts to a guy that was like cardboard wasn't actually that bad. He didn't give me that stupid look as if I was a kicked puppy, because if he did I'd seriously punch the look off his face-boyfriend or not. He just listened and held me close; it was...nice. Who knew the guy was soft like a teddy bear, well...a teddy bear with abs that is.

"Do you have anything you need to tell me?" I asked him. He pulled back, furrowing his eyebrows in thought, and exhaling in exaggeration. "When you punched me..." he trailed off, "I started liking you."

The corner of my lip twitched, "That was attractive to you?"

"No." He said quickly, eying me warily. "Stop making me sound like a masochist."

I laughed, swinging my legs off his lap and hopping off the hood of the car. "Whatever, you like it." I winked before throwing my empty cup away. Natsume slid off the hood and his footsteps against the gravel crunched loud. "I better get home." I said, walking over to my car as the wind started to pick up. I crossed my arms around my torso in a futile attempt to stay warm.

"Do me a favor," Natsume began. "talk to your mom. Hear her out, it won't kill you right?" I fiddled with my keys, thinking about last night and something in me lurched. The way mom broke, my teenage angst getting to the best of me, and Youichi just standing there taking everything in. Was mom being the selfish one or was it me?

I turned around facing Natsume, "I'll think about it." After what seemed like a second, I went closer to him then stood on my toes to kiss his cheek. If I surprised him, he didn't show it. "Thank you for listening."

;p

After pulling up to the driveway, I sat in my car. It was 7:23 and the sky began to glow, with the sun just about peaking over the mountains, and the air still crisp and cold. I thought back to all the times when mom left and came back, Youichi sitting in the living room every night sneaking glances at the front door. I leaned my head against the head rest, closing my eyes. I took in a breath and exhaled. I just wanted my mom to stay here with us. No more coming and going, not straying from us to "find herself".

I opened my eyes and finally got out the car. I slowly turned the keys in the handle and tried opening the door as quietly as possible so I wouldn't wake up Arata, if he was still sleeping in the living room. As I walked in the threshold, to my surprise, everyone was already up and at the table.

"Mikan!" Youichi had a smile on his face. Arata sitting with his back facing me, turned around, gave a small smile and lifted his hand.

The smell hit me, butter and eggs. I guessed mom was making breakfast, something she rarely does. "Come sit." Arata said. I blatantly ignored him, but reconsidered with Natsume's words still ringing in my ears. After taking off my moccasins and putting my keys on the counter, I walked over and sat down next to Youichi. I tried really hard not to have a bad expression on my face as my eyes traveled to mom standing in front of the stove flipping eggs. I was the one always cooking since mom had horrible cooking skills. Having to eat her cooking as I was growing up was tortured. I was regretting sitting down now since the memories of tasting her charcoal spam, too sweet spaghetti, and baking soda pancakes were coming back. I was about to get up when mom suddenly turned around, chiming "Done!" with her big smile on her face.

I again, tried to control my expression as she put down a pile of eggs and distributed it evenly to us. "Glad you could join us, Mikan." she said softly, as she put down my share of eggs. I stared at my plate debating whether to eat the eggs or not. Next to me, Youichi was scarfing them down; across from me, Arata ate at a slow rate as he read his newspaper; and mom was happily eating as if she never accidentally used baking soda instead of flour to make pancakes once upon a time ago.

I looked down at my eggs, poking it a little before jabbing it and sniffing it. It smelled edible and like eggs, so I took a small bite. Chewing slowly, I realized that it wasn't that bad. It was actually good. I jabbed a bigger piece and took a bite, the eggs were lightly salted and the taste of milk and eggs were nicely blended. I took a quick glance at my mom, surprised at how much her cooking skills have improved. I saw her looking at Arata, and him looking at her, mom's cheeks were slightly pink as she bit her lip and smiled at him. Her eyes looked so different, they were...bright. Her complexion was glowing and she looked younger. I haven't seen her like this since dad died. My mom was in love with this guy. She was in real love with this guy, so what was I supposed to do? No, what can I do? My mom deserves happiness just like I do, just like Youichi does. So why should I stand in her way, like I've let her leaving all the time stand in my way?

I put my fork down, cleared my throat and took a sip of orange juice. "Mom," I said, breaking her gaze at Arata. "I'm sorry." The silence in the room was deafening. Youichi's eye widened, crumbs of eggs around his full mouth. Arata, with his coffee cup halfway to his mouth, stared at me shell-shocked. Mom's piece of egg that was on her fork fell and landed on her plate, her eyes also wide. Apparently, these two words can stop the flow of time.

"It was stupid of me to get mad like that. I shouldn't have lost my composure and say all those things. I'm sorry." I looked down at my plate of eggs as I twirled the silver fork in my hand, suddenly embarrassed that I could have told her this when it was just the two of us and without the audience. Someone cleared their throat. "Mikan."

I looked up at my mom, who had the sweetest smile on her face. The tears threatening to fall from her face, "It's okay."

It's okay. she said. Something caught in my throat as I blinked. Next to me, Youichi continued eating, but slow this time and with a smile. Arata brought the cup to his mouth, taking a sip and I could have sworn he was trying to hold back a smile. Mom rubbed her big belly as she looked down, the tears falling. "My child," she whispered. "Can you feel your mom's happiness?"

I blinked again, a memory of my dad suddenly came in to my head. I fell asleep in the car one time when I was little, dad carried me to bed and I heard a soft voice as I was getting tucked in, "You're mom's happiness. Remember that." I was groggy, only half awake when he said that, so how did I manage to remember those words at this moment, years after he said that? Sitting at the table, mom wiped her eyes, Arata continued reading the newspaper, and Youichi ate. There was that prickle in my chest, as I looked down, poking at my eggs. I wondered if we could really be like this. As a family that stay connected, in tuned with each other. Families I'd seen on TV, that were so happy to see each other even if they separated for a day or a few hours. My mom looked at me, her eyes glimmering with a brilliance of brown as her lips formed into a smile I've never seen on her. I smiled back, finally feeling it. Feeling like I'm my mom's happiness.

;p

I went to school with a lighter heart. Classes went by quickly, and I haven't seen Luna or Sumire around. I told Hotaru about what happened, and she slapped me with words such as "Idiot." and "You should've done that from the start, moron." It was lunch time and we were walking to the cafeteria. Light-hearted chatter engulfed the room as we were waiting in line talking about Hotaru's business ventures. She got crab roe as usual and I got chicken katsu curry. "He told me he liked me ever since I punched his face." I laughed.

Hotaru shook her head, "Tsk tsk, you're going out with a real masochist." She took a bite of her crab roe and I took a bite of my curry.

"Don't say that around him, he's gonna yell at me." I rolled my eyes, as we were walking to the table. All of a sudden, I felt like I was floating. I saw my food float with me, and the next thing I knew, I was looking at the ceiling and there was laughter.

"Wow, that's a great look for you." I heard someone say. I looked behind me and saw Luna and Sumire smirking. The curry sauce was staining my shirt-I felt some in my hair too-and the chicken katsu spilled in front of me. Such a waste!

"No, no, no, no Sakura." she continued as I was getting up. "You need to stay down there since that's where you belong." Then another chorus of laughter was heard, encouraging Luna even more.

I silently swiped the sauce that was slowly running down my face, stepped closer to Luna, rubbed the sauce on her face. There wasn't any laughter this time, and Sumire's mouth was open.

"Oh my gosh, Luna!" my voice high like hers "You're make up looks so much better now! Here, let me add some more finishing touches!" I grabbed some more sauce from my hair and rubbed it on her face again. She stood there fidgeting like crazy.

"How mature of you, Skank." her teeth were still pearly white, as she grinned. "Is this what your mom taught you?"

I grinned back, as I wiped my hands on the napkin that managed to stay on my tray. "Oh you got jokes?" When I finished, I stepped closer to Luna, and she took a step back. I looked at her up and down, "Maybe Ruka will go for you now that you look so pretty. I mean, cause that's what you wanted right? For him to go to you instead of me."

I could tell she was trying not to look angry or affected by what I said, so she let out a bitter laugh.

"Shut up."

I flinched at Sumire's voice. I turned to look at her, she stepped in front of Luna. "What do you want, traitor?" Hotaru retorted. "Go back to standing behind Luna."

The air was tense, even I felt suffocated. "Let's just go." I finally said after what felt like hours. I picked up the tray and put the spoiled food on the plate to throw away. My appetite was ruined and I needed a shower. Just as I was about to pass them, I felt someone tugging on my arm, then my face stung.

"You're so fucking full of it Sakura!" It was Sumire. "Quit being so conceited and cocky when you're just a scared little girl who always runs away!" she spat.

I stood there, letting the words soak in. They hurt more than my cheek did. I saw Hotaru heading into the fray, but I stopped her in time because I knew she was going to do more harm than I could ever do. "Don't waste your energy on them." I told her, looking at the floor. "They're not worth it." It took a few tugs before I could get Hotaru to finally walk out of the cafeteria.

After awkwardly parting with Hotaru, I went to my locker to get my PE clothes to change into. I forgot my combination so I struggled for a bit before remembering the combo. I quickly grabbed the clothes then went into the nearest bathroom to change and tried rinsing out the sauce in my hair. After finishing, I headed back to my locker and shoved the dirty clothes in my locker. "Hey there." I heard on my left, then felt a kiss on my cheek. I tried not to show that it actually hurt more than it was supposed to feel sweet. I smiled and went back to putting-or shoving-my clothes in the locker. "How was your day so far?"

Then I stopped. "Natsume Hyuuga," I turned to him, amused. He was leaning on his arm against the few lockers next to mine. "Are you trying to make small talk?" I smirked as he suddenly straightened then ran his fingers through his hair. He cleared his throat.

"Weird." I commented, laughing a little. I was finally finished putting away my clothes, and started walking to class with Natsume falling into step. His warm hand brushed against mine as we walked. Step. Step. I felt his fingers intertwining with mine, and I quickly looked down then at him. He kept staring straight ahead, I smiled before grasping his hand tighter. "Weird." I said again.

"If it's weird then let's not do it!" he suddenly said, letting go of my hand altogether. I stopped, laughing at his childish behavior as he kept walking, with heavy footsteps. I jogged to catch up and swooped my hand, intertwining our fingers, and I squeezed. "I never said I didn't like it, you dork." I saw his lips twitch, and his face relaxed into a smile. Then he turned towards me and said, "You smell like you swam in curry."

I instinctively grabbed a lock of my hair and sniffed. I sighed, "What a waste."

"What?" He raised an eyebrow. I shook my head, "Never mind."

"What is it?" He asked again.

"It's nothing." I replied, then looked at my empty wrist. "Oh shoot! I gotta get to class or I'm gonna be late. Bye!" I walked faster but he called after me, calling me a dork. He caught up in no time, and I laughed calling him a stalker. We held hands again, and sped walked to class together. It really was weird being like this with him, but I really like it.

;p

School was over and I could finally go home. I was walking towards my car when I rested my hand on my cheek. It wasn't warm or red, it was cold, just like Sumire. I let out a sigh. Sumire really did betray me. She really doesn't like me, she's not my friend, she's siding with Luna. Am I supposed to be mad? Thinking back to all the memories we have, it still seems unreal even if she slapped me. By the time I reached my car, I felt so drained and exhausted that it took me a while just to dig my keys out and let myself in. I rested my head on the steering wheel for a few seconds.

I flinched at the sound of someone tapping on my window. I had to wipe my eyes before looking up and seeing Natsume. I rolled down my window and tried to put on a smile, "Hey."

He just stood there, no expression, no 'hey' back.

After a beat, "What's up?" I tried to sound cheerful. He still didn't say anything, he was just looking at me and I suddenly felt self-conscious that I had to look away, and I settled at staring at my hands on my lap.

"Why didn't you say anything?" he suddenly said.

I still couldn't manage to look at him, so I continued to look at my lap, "What do you mean?"

"Why don't you ever tell me anything?" his voice was rising. "Why are you always keeping secrets from me? I had to hear from Koko about what had happened at lunch!" and now he was yelling. I still didn't say anything.

"Look at me! Who am I? Some stranger? Is that why you can never tell me what goes on and keep me in the dark?" he had his hands on my door now.

I felt so tired. I just wanted to go home. I sighed, "I didn't want you to worry." I turned my head and looked at him directly in the eyes. They were so red and filled with anger.

He stood straight and ran his hand through his hair again, letting out a breath.

"I'm going to go home and sleep, okay?" I said softly, looking at my hands again. "I don't want to be here anymore." When I looked up, Natsume was already halfway across the parking lot. My heart dropped, and something caught in my throat. I sat there, with my engine still running, watching his back walk away. I let out a shaky breath before switching gears, and pulling out of the parking lot.