Sorry I was late in updating this. This chapter…almost killed me.
It was a monster in length and I'm not...completely satisfied with it. To be honest the characters all threw me off as I was writing. They might seem a bit off and I apologize for that.
But, on another note. I got my first flame for this story, and I have got to say-normally I get pissed off about them, but this one I had to laugh because he basically bashed my entire first chapter, and accused me of making all my characters one-dimensional and poorly crafted anime characters. Apparently they weren't "real" enough and the plot I have going is terrible because of it, and he based his entire opinion on the intro...I mean, really?...Now, let's examine what he said for a second. He said my characters have no depth, and I'll give him credit for that because in the first chapter it was an INTRO there was no depth to any of my characters. That was done purposely. He said the plot was poorly done and reflected a poorly crafted anime? Well to be honest-ATLA is a Korean cartoon. If it hadn't been made there it woulda been made in Japan and to be frank-it has alot of anime elements in it anyways, and lastly the intro is not even a FRACTION of the plot. There's so much going on in the background and subplots that I neglected to mention in the first chapter. You can't give constructive criticism on the intro of a story. You can't even do a successful flame based on the intro of a story. So to all FUTURE flamers-if you're going to dislike my story. Read it first, than tell me why you don't like it and maybe I can make some changes. I'm all for fixing mistakes.
So yeah...in any case I'm done ranting.
Read and Enjoy.
Zuko rubs his throbbing temple, trying to assuage his pounding head. He felt like rhinos were eviscerating the inner walls of his cranium. He was suffering after a restless night filled with nothing but worry, and an exceedingly busy day filled with nothing but superficial words, and subtle probing questions to test the waters. Azula's whereabouts were submerged somewhere in darkest depths of ambiguity, and he was using all his resources to make her surface again.
So far he had been unsuccessful.
Earlier that morning, Iroh had left with the regulators to go search for Azula the hard way. The Dragon of the West was going to use a more hands on approach in trying to locate her and expected Zuko to play his part as well. He had said as much with the subtle flippancy, and good natured humor that only Iroh was capable of. However, just before his Uncle exited the gates of the palace he sent a servant scurrying back to Zuko with a message-telling him to check with his scribe: Lucia Donaro.
Apparently Iroh had done some digging before he left, and gathered enough information to make a viable list of candidates for Zuko to question. The Firelord remembered his eyebrows slowly creeping to his hairline as he skimmed over Iroh's meticulous scrawl.
Hello my favorite nephew,
I came to the realization late last night that you might need a more enlightened perspective than what I gave you. In my old age, I seem to have forgotten that you and your sister did not travel in the same social circles, and you went out of your way to avoid her. That would make searching for her difficult on your end. So I ordered some of my more experienced regulators to hunt for some more information, and they made this list.
This isn't all of Azula's contacts but they're a start. Question them and see where it leads you.
Remember not to stress yourself too much over this. The best decisions are made with a calm mind Zuko.
The rest of the letter was a long list of names he didn't recognize. Only half were Fire Nation in origin, and others were clearly residents in one of the other two nations. Zuko knew his sister was well connected, but he wasn't fully aware of the scope of her connections until today. This list spanned over every nationality and social class. It appeared that nobles were just a conduit for her. She used their resources, but the majority of the list was the lower class.
It was typical of her. Azula associated with people she could easily overpower.
Regular citizens didn't stand a chance.
But to her credit-it meant that they wouldn't stand a chance against him either.
With this thought in mind, he began making visits. He started with the first name on the list: Taro, and ended up meeting a young shady looking man. He admitted to knowing Azula, but said their relationship was completely platonic. Zuko wasn't the most observant person in the world, but even he could recognize a blatant lie when he heard one. Whatever dealings the young Fire citizen had with Azula, they were something he didn't want advertised. Ignoring the boy's vehement denial, he changed his course of questioning. He asked if Taro knew about Azula's escape? Taro said no. He asked how Taro felt about Azula? Taro said he hated her.
Following each sequential visit after Taro Zuko was met with the same violent response. Everyone he asked, every single person-said they knew Azula and despised her.
They would gladly see her go to the noose.
He wasn't getting anywhere. Each possible lead ended disastrously, and finally after hours of unsuccessful searching he decided to call it a day. He'd barely made a dent in the list but he was drained physically and emotionally. The thought alone-of going on another escapade to cross examine and question another one of Azula's rude contacts made him cringe.
Now he sat in one of the lush dining halls in the Palace, trying to figure out how to deal with a migraine.
"FireLord Zuko."
He didn't look up, his head still cradled gently between his hands. "Yes?" He asked stiffly, trying keep his voice even. He could tell from the reverent tone he was being addressed with that the one calling him by his title was a Palace servant. Either someone sent the servant on an errand or he had something negative to bring to Zuko's attention.
"Firelord, The Southern Water Tribe Liaisons are in the hall. They wish to speak with you."
That made him look up. What were Katara and Sokka doing outside? He hadn't spoken to them since Aang's illustrious announcement. They hadn't been avoiding each other, but they were reluctant to reside too long in each other's company because they could not reach an understanding regarding the Avatar. Zuko was convinced that Aang was guilty of something. He remembered the accusatory words that left the airbender's mouth and the disappointed expression he leveled Zuko with.
"I don't regret what I've done tonight, but you all should regret your actions. You should have some hint of remorse for the hell you've managed to create in the last five years."
Zuko scowled, his scars creasing at the unwelcome thought.
Aang abandoned his duties. He abandoned his friends, and Zuko found such negligence unbecoming of him. A true friend- a true man was loyal. How could the Avatar turn his back on the people that needed them? It was a question that beguiled him. Sokka agreed that something was wrong, but not with the same vehemence or gusto Zuko did, and Katara was under the impression that something more was going on beneath the surface. The waterbender was convinced that Aang had his own worthwhile reasons for leaving that he hadn't shared.
Zuko didn't care about his reasons.
He cared about the consequences of his actions.
The government they'd instituted lost face because of Aang's refusal to be involved. Losing credence made the people talk, it made them wonder, and in the end-made them rebel. That was the last thing he wanted, and because of his uncompromising stance regarding Aang the Avatar decided to make himself scarce, and he hadn't been privy to the Southern Water tribe representatives in days.
Now they were just outside his dining hall.
"Let them in." He said, his voice clipped.
The servant bobbed submissively, and quietly inclined his head in respect before exiting the room. A second later, Zuko heard the doors open and shut again and the sound of booted feet scraping against his polished floor filtered toward him. He winced at the sound, his headache coming back in spades. He deigned to look up and saw Sokka's stocky form just as he took a seat at the table followed by Katara. They were dressed casually in the silken red of the Fire Nation-which Zuko could admit, suited the siblings.
"Long time no see, eh? Zuko." Sokka's deep timber resonated throughout the room, and Zuko frowned, his jaw clenching at the familiar booming tone.
"Could you lower your voice please?" He pleaded, the jackhammers continuing to drill miniscule holes into his skull until the whole structure caved in.
"Are you okay Zuko?" Katara asks softly, unrestrained concern darkening her gaze.
Zuko sent her a grateful look for speaking quietly. "Yes, I just have a serious migraine." He admitted, waving off her concerned look with slight flick of his hand. "Don't worry about it, I'm fine. What brings you two here?" He asked, reverting to a more business-like tone.
"We're here to see if you're still alive, and to check and see if you've done anything stupid without us." Sokka said seriously, a solemn expression on his face. Zuko could see the jovial look in his eye though. Clearly, the tribesmen was making light of the last few days. It was easy for Sokka to do-despite the volatile circumstances that curbed his easygoing nature, the tribesmen still had a good sense of humor, and an even temper unlike Zuko.
"What Sokka is trying to say," Katara said diplomatically, cutting her brother an unamused look, "Is that we were wondering if there was anything we could do to help?" She asked hopefully, her eyes reflecting her desire to assist in the situation.
Help?
He laid his hands palm flat across the table, splaying his fingers openly in a thoughtful pose. He could use some help, but there was very little his friends could do. "I don't think that's a good idea. I need help finding Azula, and with Iroh's guidance I've been digging but a lot of these people are touchy, and don't respond well to questioning. They will never cooperate if more people get involved." A much put-upon sigh escaped his lips.
Katara bit her lip, looking a bit let down by the news. "I suppose it's just as well." She said after a moment of silence passed between the three warriors. "Sokka and I have responsibilities at home we need to tend to."
"Actually Katara, one of use should stay here and help smooth over the situation with Aang. I was thinking of returning home on my own and letting you and Zuko clean up that mess." Sokka grinned, fixing his sister with a pointed look.
Zuko made a face, not particularly thrilled at the prospect, but then his gaze wandered over to Katara who looked relieved. Her expression could almost be described as eager. She wanted to stay.
Why?
Zuko wondered. Why was Katara so intent on staying in the Fire Nation? Just to help? Somehow he doubted that. No matter what she said, humans were inherently self motivated. They worked for their own interests to their own ends. She wanted something. Idly, he wondered what that something was.
She cleared her throat.
"I think the best way to go about fixing the situation with the people is to find Aang. Have either of you seen him?"
Zuko shook his head.
Perhaps he shouldn't have been asking what she was staying for, but rather for whom she was staying for.
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In Safe Haven
"So, you're going to have a funeral for Ty Lee here?" Azula asked, her tone carefully neutral as she stared at Toph.
The blind earthbender nodded. "She was well loved by the people, and they will want to mourn for her." She explained, her expression solemn.
The former princess snorted. The earthbender knew very well she didn't care what the people of this place wanted.
This conversation was just a distraction.
A very poor distraction to keep her from noticing the pain she was in.
Azula flinched as long bony fingers ghosted over her battered frame, searching, and tentative as they traced over her bruises and scars. She bared her teeth at the healer in front of her. "Hurry up." She hissed. She hated being touched, even a physician's casual examination was distasteful to her. It didn't help that he was taking his sweet time, and that she was in extreme pain.
"Sorry." He drew back, his expression apologetic.
Her temper continued to simmer even as he fell back a respectable distance from her. This healer- Kei, as he was called, had been prodding at her for over an hour, testing her bones, her muscles, the severity of her bruises, monitoring her reactions as he poked at every square inch of her body. Every few moments he would jot something down on a scroll his expression grave. At the beginning of this visit, she found his actions a trifle unsettling, but she tolerated him. That was then. By this time she found his mere presence an aggravation. The only reason she hadn't charred his face beyond recognition was because of the blind earthbender sitting languidly in the corner. Well, that and the agonizing amount of pain she had to endure when she tried to firebend.
"I have…Unfortunate news." Kei rubbed his eyes tiredly and dropped the scroll he'd been writing in on the desk.
Azula straightened at his tone. It was not…positive.
Across the room she saw Toph edge nearer, tilting her head towards the healer to hear his words. "Lay it on us Kei." The earthbender prompted him.
"Her…" He trailed off shaking his head, and murmured something beneath his breath. Suddenly his youthful face looked pale, and old as he met Azula's gaze. "Your condition Ms Azula is serious. When you were in captivity, the people imprisoning you neglected you terribly. You weren't moved enough. You didn't get enough activity. You're muscles are irreparably damaged. Not only that, but you've lost some bone mass. You are nowhere near the weight of what someone your age and height should be. You were washed off enough, or as you put it in my report "hosed off" enough so you didn't develop a skin infection, but your wounds you received via interrogation were never treated properly. So the bacteria wasted away at your flesh. These wounds, even with treatment won't heal properly."
He finally stopped his long rant, pausing to take a breath. His voice softened and Azula felt the finality in his next words. "Azula, even with therapy, and years of healing your body will never be the same way it was….You can't stress yourself. In time you'll be able to walk normally, but you will probably never be able to fight again."
Azula ceased moving.
She ceased breathing.
…She would never fight again?
Ever?
This news struck a chord in her, derailing whatever thought she'd been on. Ty Lee's death had cut her deeply, but it hadn't been like this. Coping with death was one thing, but it was existential. Death caressed you, it drained you, it ravaged you, but it didn't carve out a part of you. Losing the power to fight was synonymous to losing a part of what characterized her-losing what defined her as Azula. She'd been fighting as long she'd been walking. She was groomed to fight. Ozai enforced this for her. Under his tutelage her skill grew, and fighting came as easy as breathing.
And now she felt like she was suffocating.
Dimly, she was aware of a long suffering sigh in the background, before Toph's dry voice filled the room.
"You never have good news, do you Kei?"
"I'm sorry." He exclaimed, making placating gestures in front of him like he was expecting abuse from the infamous General. Toph didn't raise a hand against him though, the blind earthbender just sent a bored look in his direction as if asking why he was still in the room if his job was done.
The healer chuckled nervously. "I'm going to prescribe some heavy doses of my herbal medication, and give you a strict regime to help speed up your muscle recovery…but I can't promise miracles. Odds are you will only be able to walk again, but activities like running, or fighting will be too strenuous on you."
Azula's hands clenched into fists, her knuckles turning white beside her limp legs. "And if I ignore you and engage in those activities anyways?" She intoned, her voice colorless. She had to ask. She had to make this surreal moment more palpable. Accepting the alternative, accepting how bleak her future was, meant accepting several other unpleasant realizations.
It meant accepting she'd been completely defeated.
It meant accepting she'd failed in…everything.
It meant accepting she was weak.
Her pride wouldn't allow her to admit any of that.
"If you decide to circumvent my orders…you're muscles will collapse completely and you will be paralyzed for the remainder of your life."
Azula's breath hitched.
Her balled fists started shaking.
Of course.
Naturally.
It was a given.
Zuko managed to find the one thing she had left and completely decimate it. She could not even keep her health in check of her own accord-thanks to her Dear Lord brother.
She was truly pitiful.
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At the Palace
Katara walked down the familiar stony pathway, her heart pounding in her ears. She'd left Zuko's company hours ago to search for Aang. She'd been unsuccessful in finding him so far. He wasn't in his room, although his stuff still lay pragmatically on the edge of the bed. He wasn't in the stables although Appa was sleeping lazily against a loft of hay. He wasn't in any of the normal places he'd normally wander off to so she decided to look somewhere less conventional.
Long before the Purging, or the culmination of the Four Nation's council she'd been privy to all of Aang's secrets, and all of the places he went off to-to think or to meditate. He shared some of those places with her. There were several spots hidden throughout the Fire, Earth, and Water Nations that they'd designated as their own. Their chosen hiding places were private-set apart from the rest of the world so they couldn't be interrupted. At the time, they were together, and fully committed to each other. She'd follow him to the gates of hell, and he'd already walked through fire for her.
She loved him back then.
Sometimes she wondered if she still loved him…
She stopped analyzing her feelings, and took a shaky breath marveling at the tantalizing salty scent teasing her senses. She was close.
Her eyes flicked over towards the familiar rock formation in front of her. Boulders easily twice her size hung precariously on a ledge-too large to be moved, and too stubborn to be shifted. She picked her way to the edge where the rocks blocked the path leading to a steep downward's cliff, each progressing step shepherding her towards the sound of rushing water. With practiced ease she spider climbed up the side of one particular jagged boulder, hauling herself to it's peak, and peering over the side.
Aang was the first thing she saw.
The airbender sat serenely in the middle of a waterfall, his pale body glistening as the water cascaded down his form. His eyes were closed, and he sat in the typical meditative pose, letting the rhythmic beat of the water lull him into a relaxed state. He must have been extremely stressed to meditate in these conditions. The cold season was approaching and the water generally felt like drowning in a bucket of ice this time of year. On the shore his shirt, and monk's robe lay discarded in the sand leaving him clothed in only his pants. That left the waterbender plenty to stare at, and she did let her gaze trace his face and rove down his broad shoulders to his well sculpted chest, before gathering herself and staring at his face again.
The Katara of ten years ago would have blushed painfully.
But now…
The waterbender stood up from her perch, and swept her hand into a large arc in front of her. At her whim, water snaked out from the inner recesses of the waterfall, weaving gracefully through air before encircling her. She windmilled her arms back and forth urging the pool forming beneath her feet to slide her through the air. It did so compliantly, and Katara found herself floating towards Aang.
The Avatar, roused by the feel of her chi rippling through the air cracked one eye open as she landed deftly on both feet in front of him.
"Katara." He blinked, his gaze misty as the water cascaded down his face. He carefully stood up himself, abandoning his meditation and stepped out of the range of the droplets pouring over him. "What are you doing here?" He shook himself, not unlike a dog who needed to shed the water from his fur.
"I came to talk to you." She said simply, amused by his antics.
He knew he could just airbend himself dry right?
He must have come to the same conclusion because a minute later a furious windstorm encircled him, blinding Aang from Katara's view. When the jagged wisps dissipated around him, he stood in front of her completely dry. "What about?" He asked, his expression cautious, and his tone guarded.
She winced. "About what happened earlier…Aang Zuko thinks you're abandoning us. He thinks you don't care anymore, and that instead of serving the people you're now serving yourself."
Aang didn't physically react. His face remained unusually stony and impassive and that worried her. Of all her friends the airbender was the most expressive. His emotions were always on his sleeve for the world to read, but lately she couldn't read him. He accused them of changing, but Aang wasn't the same boy he was anymore either. As if emphasizing her point he responded in the same way a stranger or a wary enemy would.
"And what do you think?" He said artfully taking control of the conversation.
"I don't know what to think." She admitted truthfully. "You said you didn't trust us anymore Aang, after all we've been through…I don't understand how you could doubt us. I also don't understand why it's so easy for you to walk away." Age old frustration trickled into her tone. Her father abandoned her for the greater good, and Aang was treading down the same path.
"You guys haven't exactly given me a reason to feel differently. You're all so uncompromising. You don't listen to anyone-least of all me. You're indifferent to the people's needs, and you're completing what Ozai started. There is no such thing as a utopia. When you all finally realize that-nothing will be left." He said, his tone dark and uncharacteristic for the light hearted airbender, but then his face softened and he looked away. "And it wasn't easy walking away: It was the hardest thing I've ever done." He said quietly, his eyes soulful and filled with remorse.
Katara's heart clenched. "Then why don't you come back?"
"I can't." His voice shook as if he wanted to add more, but couldn't bring himself too.
"No one's stopping you Aang." She reminded him softly. Zuko would welcome the airbender's return, and she would too.
"I can't." His voice cracked. "I couldn't live with myself if I came back."
"Do you think what we're doing is so horrible?" She was genuinely confused by his refusal. Why was he so insistent on leaving? He couldn't be that disgusted by their actions. They weren't killing in cold blood, they were ridding the world of evil-of people that couldn't even be called humans. They were monsters, and deserved to be destroyed. She'd stopped agonizing over this issue years ago, and couldn't recall ever being conflicted like Aang was.
At her question, his expression contorted into—not disgust, but into overwhelming disappointment. "The old Katara would've known the answer to that question." He replied, his words cutting into her like a knife.
Katara lowered herself to the ground to accommodate her legs that had fallen asleep. Her icy blue eyes fixed on Aang's solemn ones. She turned over his words in her mind. The Old Katara huh…
A bitter smile quirked her lips.
"The old Katara is gone Aang." She reminded him gently.
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Aang's Pov
He looked at her then, really looked at her. She'd grown older, tawnier, more distinguished. She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen, but right now he'd never been so repulsed by her. "What happened to you?" He asked sharply, his voice coming out harsher than he meant it to. There was culpable gap between him and all his friends. Since his impromptu announcement the gulf had only widened, but with Katara standing here, in front of him he wanted to cross that divide.
He wanted to know why she wasn't the sweet girl he remembered anymore.
She chuckled.
It wasn't a pleasant sound. "The war happened Aang. Everyone changed."
"I was with you after the war. You were fine. We were fine." He said, recalling that brief span of time they were happy and carefree. It seemed like an eternity ago.
Her eyes glazed over, most likely remembering the same tender memories he had just been reliving. He remembered every touch, every kiss, every clumsy attempt he'd ever made to get closer to her over those years. He'd ached for her, and every moment he couldn't be by her was pure torture.
She wasn't like this then.
So what went remiss?
"Did you ever notice how after the first year or so we started drifting apart?" She asked airily, gazing intently at him for a reaction. "We didn't emotionally draw away from each other but we had more demands placed on us so we started seeing each other less. You were always off helping people-fixing people. I couldn't come with you because Zuko begged me to help with the uprisings happening around the Fire Nation. Some of those people were so angry that he was in power…"
"I remember." He said stiffly. He remembered that time as vividly as he rememberd the time they were inseparable
Her smile widened. "Sokka was in the same boat as me. We were part of a containment unit. We contained the rebels trying to assassinate Zuko, or cripple the Fire Nation, to install some other tyrant to rule there. We did this for months Aang." She spat out months like it was a vile word, and the airbender flinched at her tone. "I almost never saw you during that time, I became so used to surviving each day without you and communicating with you through letters I almost forgot what you looked like."
Aang grinned weakly.
He remembered struggling with the same vices. He'd missed Katara terribly, but couldn't find the time to meet up with her because he had his own peace keeping duties to attend to and she was doing a favor for Zuko.
"I remember that too." He said, withholding a pained grimace.
"Did I tell you that Sokka and I were captured during that time too?" Her teeth flashed in the waning sunlight, reminding him more of a predator revealing it's fangs than an actual smile.
Then her words actually sunk in.
"Wait...what?!" His eyes widened
Katara and Sokka had been captured? By who? Why? He plopped down to the ground not trusting himself to stand and interrogate her with questions. He criss-crossed his legs beneath him, his eyes fixed on her face. Judging by her expression she wasn't joking. Why would anyone imprison Katara, or her brother? And why had she never mentioned this before? His bewilderment must have showed on his face because she chuckled, and this time he didn't feel a chill run down his spine when she was done laughing.
"We were captured. Me, Sokka, and our entire unit were ambushed by one of those anarchist groups. They had us for three months Aang. Three long, dreary months before we were released."
Aang gaped at her.
Three months? And he'd never known until today?
What was he supposed to say to that?
No words seemed sufficient.
Luckily he was saved the trouble of looking for the right reassurances, because Katara carried on in her story, completely oblivious of his horrified look. "We were dragged underground and forced into this little cramped space. It was dark and cold… They had these…chains that took away our bending. I've never seen anything like them before. We didn't know there names, or what they wanted. They kept asking questions about Zuko-endless questions about what his goals were, and what his plans to save the Fire Nation were. We couldn't answer. We didn't know. Zuko didn't even know the answers to those questions. So how could we? Then this masked lady, their leader decided to force an answer out of us." Her voice faltered, but the rest of the words trickled out at her behest. "It was the most painful thing I've ever gone through…and Sokka still won't talk about it."
Aang had tuned her out at masked lady.
Lady Grey's stormy eyes flashed across the surface of his mind.
He'd never considered her a threat before though. She was his friend, and he trusted her, but Katara's words made a sliver of doubt enter his mind. He understood everyone had a capacity to be evil. He also understood that, in the grand of scheme of things Lady Grey was not the only masked woman in the world. Even though he was one of the few people graced with her name, and knew what she looked like beneath the mask-He couldn't completely dismiss the voice in the back of his head that was telling him she was terrifying.
She possessed a power, intensity, and charisma that could only be matched by a few people-like Toph and Azula for example. Just like them-She was adamant in getting her way, and stubborn like most good leaders, two exemplary qualities that made her capable of the cruelty Katara was talking about.
But was Lady Grey the one responsible?
He didn't know.
He did know she was dangerous though.
"After she came to the conclusion we had nothing to offer-she let us go." Katara said, her voice hollow. He could hear a slight tremor there, that had he been anyone else he could have ignored. Instead, before he realized what he was doing, he found himself fluttering closer so their arms were brushing. He sat down noting the almost non-existant space between them.
"Why didn't you tell me Katara?" He asked softly.
Unhinged by his look, or perhaps by his tone, Aang watched as tears glistened at the edge of her eyes. He wanted to tug her into an embrace, but he wasn't allowed such liberties anymore. So his hands remained loosely at his side. He expected her to break down into unwilling tears, but he didn't expect her to lash out at him-so when her fists began beating angrily against his chest, robbing him of breath, he rocked back a step before grasping her wrists tightly and drawing her to him.
"When was I supposed to tell you Aang? When I finally got released from that hellhole Mai was assassinated, and not too long after that Suki died." She thrashed against his grip, tears rolling down her face. Instead of releasing her, he pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. "And right after that you left, preaching the same nonsense you were talking earlier. What was I supposed to do Aang? Beg to talk to you?" She murmured darkly into his neck. His heart thudded painfully in his chest, and he was reminded keenly of the time when it used to beat only for her. Even though they were no longer together seeing her in pain made him fall back into old habits: He still couldn't stand to see her unhappy.
"I'm sorry." He murmured against her ear.
Toph was right-he was weak.
He wanted desperately to do the right thing, and that meant leaving but right now all he wanted to do was comfort his friend, and former love.
He couldn't leave like this.
Her tear streaked face would haunt him for months.
Katara drew back from the embrace to stare up at him, but didn't leave his arms. Aang reveled in the feeling. He hadn't been this close to her in a long time. Her warm breath fanned over his face, and he resisted the urge to lean in and capture her lips. He remembered how addictive those were. He'd never surface for air again if he crossed that line, and he couldn't walk down that road again.
He was being appallingly selfish right now.
Instead of remaining inert, he released the grip he had on her waist and disentangled himself from her.
She sighed morosely when he backed away from her.
"You're still leaving aren't you?" She asked, her voice small.
Guilt welled up in his chest. Once again his decision was hurting someone and he was helpless to change that. "Yes, it's for the best."
Katara's expression crumpled. "Will you be back before Ty Lee's transported?"
His brows furrowed together. Ty Lee…transported?
What was she talking about?
"What are you talking about?"
At his question, Katara paled considerably. "That's right you don't know…"
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In Safe Haven
Toph gently set the former princess on the Futon in her room, being careful not too jolt her too much. Azula had been quiet since they'd left the physician's house and she didn't know how to react to the woman's brooding silence. After being in Azula's company for the past several days-She was slowly becoming accustomed to the firebender's icy attitude, and biting comments. She wasn't familiar with the woman's silence though.
She found it…unsettling.
But then again, the former princess had a lot to iron out in her head. She just lost the ability to fight. Azula must be reeling at this new change in events. Toph also found them earth shattering but for different reasons. She wasn't fond of the firebender by any stretch of the imagination, but on some level she did respect her. She always felt a measure of respect for reputable fighters.
Azula had mastered the highest level of firebending, that in itself was remarkable, but now she couldn't even use the skill she'd worked so hard to master. Regardless of their past history, and of how viciously the former princess treated the people around her, Toph couldn't help but feel indignant at the loss.
True fighters were rare.
Azula had kidnapped, threatened, and manipulated her way into a legendary status. She'd swindled her way into glory, but her fighting skill was unparalleled. It wasn't an exaggeration. If Katara had not interfered in the Agni Kai against Zuko, Azula would have ended him, and Toph knew it.
She felt it.
Just as she felt Azula's despair settling over the room now like a cold wave.
"Are you just going to sit there and pretend the last thirty minutes didn't happen?" Azula's familiar sneer made her tilt her head. The cold severity that was normally absent from the princess' tone was back again, renewed by her staggering loss.
"That was my intent." Toph said loftily, folding her arms under her breasts and leaning back against the wall behind her. "We're not friends so you wouldn't appreciate me trying to lift your mood. We're not enemies anymore either so I won't kick you while your down. The best I can offer you is silence." She shrugged, hearing Azula shift on the futon. She could almost feel the princess' weighty stare on her.
"Or you could leave." Azula offered snarkily.
"I could." Toph said amiably, not rising to the bait. Azula wasn't going to drive her from her own quarters.
"I despise you." The princess said darkly.
Toph smirked, hearing the anger abating from the princess' words. She wasn't garnering a reaction so now she was running out of things to attack her with. Azula wanted to unleash her pent-up rage on someone, but Toph wasn't volunteering herself. She'd made her position clear. They weren't friends. She wasn't obligated to be the princess' emotional punching bag. "I know." She replied, following her pattern of answering curtly. Azula's words hardly registered to her.
She seemed to hate everything with the same single-minded intensity.
"What? The feeling isn't mutual?" Azula asked coldly, her words sharp and ornery.
"Nope." Toph replied truthfully, not expounding into an explanation. If she hated the princess-Azula would be dead. Zuko would have killed her ten times over.
Azula snorted, deriving her own meaning from Toph's words. "Pathetic peasant, I don't need your pity."
Toph grinned, genuinely amused by her reaction. "I don't pity you Princess. I'm infuriated by you. I want you to stay anywhere but here. You annoy me, but you don't inspire pity. Believe it or not I'd prefer you to get better. It would make things easier in the long run."
Azula fell silent, and Toph had to strain to hear her moving around. Obviously, Azula wasn't expecting her to say that. The princess knew how to respond to cruelty, anger and hatred. She clearly didn't know how to respond to anything positive. Her words weren't nice, but they weren't laced with malice either.
"You don't lie at all do you?" Azula asked lowly, and Toph noted her voice was teeming with exhaustion, and something else-something bitter.
"Nope." Toph said quietly, not eager to prolong this already dying conversation. Azula wasn't interested in her answers, and Toph wasn't interested in sharing. Their words were empty, and pointless. Although her question was easy to answer- As a rule, she didn't lie. She was brutally honest, and people found that quality petrifying. No one enjoyed being told truth.
Lies were easier to swallow.
Azula knew that well. Her entire life was seeped in lies.
Being forcefully introduced into the truth was destroying her.
"Ty Lee didn't either." The princess murmured tiredly. Either Azula was seconds away from succumbing to sleep or the physicians words had completely warped her mind. Toph couldn't imagine the former princess divulging that type of information while she was completely conscious.
Her theory was proven correct when Azula's breaths evened out signaling the princess' unhalting surrender to sleep.
"Night princess." Toph yawned, waiting until she heard Azula's quiet exhales to leave the room. She would see her in the morning.
But one thought stuck with her as she walked down the hallway.
Where's your fire princess?
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxX
A few Hours later…
Azula slept sparingly, unable to rest more than a few hours at a time. Her mind refused to relax so she couldn't force herself to sleep. She was far too wired. She stared into the darkness enveloping the room, letting her eyes adjust to the lengthy shadows. Sleep alluded her still. She fidgeted, throwing the sheet off of her, and rubbing her eyes tiredly. She needed something to do to occupy her mind. She couldn't afford to dwell on herself, or on her circumstances-the fact that she was now crippled confounded her.
Desperate to find something to do, she snapped her fingers, conjuring a small blue flame. It illuminated the room, casting pale azure shadows across every surface. The amount of effort it would cost to move, surpassed the urge to find something relevant to do. Unconsciously her hand drifted under her pillow, grasping Ty Lee's journal.
She dragged the battered book out, and rested it in her lap.
She'd only read the first entry before, and there were several pages left before Ty Lee's carefully printed scrawl disappeared.
Toph's words from before filtered across her mind."The journal might have some of the answers you seek."
She sifted through the pages, finding the spot where she left off.
Educating herself on the past couldn't hurt.
Dear Azula,
Did you know what upon my provisionary release I joined the Kyoshi Warriors? No, I guess not...I'm not exactly your favorite person right now….
#*$ () #&$) #U_$ #&$( #$U#*(_ #$* #+$*($& (_! &$ #&$(*#
1 year after the war
Ty Lee glanced down in awe at the bulky green armor weighing her down. She was wearing a heavy, metal plated skirt that restricted her movement as well as long durable green pants underneath that. A chest plate guarded her upper body, and a hot helmet proficiently protected her head. She did a wondering twirl, listening as the metal clanked together in the dismal silence.
"This is awesome." She gushed, admiring the design.
"You are more excited about getting the armor than any of our other new recruits." Suki laughed, clapping the acrobat companionably on the shoulder.
Ty Lee stutter-stepped to keep her balance, and turned back to stick her tongue out at her amused companion. "That's because they're all sourpusses. I mean, I've heard of traditional, but your warrior sisters are over the top." She complained with an adamant shake of her head.
"They've been sheltered." Suki defended them meekly, her lips twitching at Ty Lee's petulant expression.
Of all the Kyoshi warriors, Ty Lee had grown the closest to Suki. Despite the terrible things Azula did to her, and the part she played in hurting her-they still managed to find common ground. The acrobat had been transported to Kyoshi island on the eve of her release. At first her presence had been tolerated. People treated her like she was diseased and wouldn't associate with her outside of work or training. Suki had broken the mold-insisting on following Ty Lee around.
They didn't trust each other, or rather, Suki didn't trust her.
But in spending time with her, in forcing herself to invade Ty Lee's home, and life, she learned a lot about the acrobat. At first Suki also treated her like she was Fire Nation filth. Ty Lee was undeterred by the hostility directed towards her-Suki was mellow in comparison to Azula. She accepted her hateful glares with a patient smile and confused the Kyoshi warrior to no end. But eventually even her aggressive attitude began to wane.
Suki stopped treating her like a villain, and started treating her like an equal.
Eventually they even managed to call themselves friends.
Ty Lee found the change in status refreshing.
With Suki's acceptance, she was able to garner the acceptance of the other warrior sisters as well. They named her an honorary sister in arms, and graced her with one of their infamous sets of armor. Superficially, they respected her, and added her to their numbers. Ty Lee had been accepted into the fold, and she found the experience daunting, and yet invigorating.
She hadn't felt she'd belonged somewhere since she attached herself to Azula.
This was new, but not terrible.
In another lifetime she would have loved it here.
She still felt disjointed though. Even though she was exploring where her place was now-her heart was still with Azula. She'd been following in the princess' shadow for so long she forgot what it felt like to function without her. She missed her friend to the point of helplessness. One of Ty Lee's greatest attributes and flaws was her unerring loyalty. Her first and only allegiance was to her princess.
Underlying that thought, being free while Azula was in prison felt wrong. To be frank-it disgusted her.
She was responsible for a fraction of the crimes Azula got credit for.
So was Mai for that matter.
But Azula was the only one still paying for them.
The princess was bearing the weight of the world on her shoulders, and Ty Lee was playing dress up with Suki.
Suddenly she felt nauseous.
"Ty Lee are you okay?" Suki's steadying hand held her upright before she could keel over. She was seconds away from upheaving her breakfast. She was certainly not okay. Her body was betraying her, exposing all of her guilt and self deprecating emotions. She felt miserable.
"No." She said, her voice an agonized whisper.
"What's wrong hun?" Suki asked, gently pushing a stray strand of hair back behind Ty Lee's ear. The acrobat flinched at the familiar touch, and the hand drew away, falling to her side.
"I miss Azula…" Ty Lee admitted unabashedly. "I hate that she's still locked up."
Suki's mouth dropped open in shock, her expression resembling that of a fish. Ty Lee waited for her friend to gather herself, and eventually the unbridled shock turned into poorly contained surprise and then into pure defiance. "Ty Lee, Azula's not a good person." The Kyoshi warrior informed her, her tone a lot chillier than it had been a second ago.
Azula brought out the worst in people.
"I know." Ty Lee murmured.
"She deserves to be locked up." Suki continued stubbornly.
"I know." Ty Lee agreed with her, but only for a second. "But so do I."
"You're different." Suki tried to object, but Ty Lee shook her head refusing to listen to the false niceties pouring from her friend's mouth.
"I'm not. I did terrible things too." Ty Lee's smile wavered and her eyes turned glassy. "I hurt people, just like she did. I killed people just like she did. Everything she did-I'm also guilty of because I helped her."
"Ty Lee…" Suki trailed off unsure of what to add.
Ty Lee sniffled a little. "Don't get me wrong-Azula's attitude could use some polishing. She's mean, and no matter what you do she'll burn you because that's all she knows, but of all the people in the world that participated in the war-the least casualties happened when she was around. But somehow, she ended up with the worst punishment of us all. It's not fair…"
Only silence answered her.
It was usually the action she received when defending Azula.
"Alright Ty Lee, I'll send a letter to Zuko."
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx(We interrupt this journal entry to bring you…more bad news)xxxxxxX
Meanwhile right when Azula first started reading….
Aang burst into Lady Grey's private quarters his face flushed, and his breath coming in quick heavy pants. He'd sprinted all the way here, and even with gusts of wind quickening his steps he was tired. He'd pushed Appa for the majority of the night to arrive in Safe Haven, and as soon as his sky bison landed, he'd darted into the palace swift as a lightning bolt.
"What's wrong Avatar?"
Lady Grey's stormy gaze fixed on him-quiet, measuring. She wasn't expecting him, but she didn't show surprise or shock at his unplanned arrival. Even though he was positive she'd been asleep a few minutes ago, her appearance was pristine and her gaze calcuting and coherent like always.
"Where's Toph?" He demanded, his voice rushed and uncharacteristically authoritative.
"Right here." A dry voice grumbled behind him. He turned around and came nose to nose with his earthbending teacher. Unlike her masked counterpart Toph's appearance was one comprised of pure chaotic disarray. Her clothes were wrinkled, and her long raven colored hair stuck out in several directions. She looked like she just rolled out of bed. As if to confirm this thought she poked him hard in the chest. "What did I say about stampeding through this estate like a retarded Rhino-boar? People are trying to sleep." She snapped at him.
Normally Aang would have taken offense and offered a stuttering apology but he wasn't feeling up to it today. "Sorry, but this was important."
The earthbender frowned at his words. "Why are you here Twinkle Toes?" She cut herself off abruptly. Her nose wrinkled as she plaintively sniffed the air. "You reek of Katara." She huffed, rolling her eyes.
The airbender blushed painfully than cleared his throat.
"I'm here to tell you about Ty Lee. Did you know Zuko plans on foregoing a burial for her? He's going to leave her body out for the crows to feed on." Aang bit out quickly, hoping to force the idea down their throat so they could take some time to acclimate themselves to it.
A dreadful silence ensued after his words-one that was only broken when Toph's fist slammed into the wall beside her, shattering the surface of the stone, and leaving a huge dent.
"That bastard did what?" Aang winced as Toph's temper flared dangerously.
The earthbender rarely ever resorted to vulgarity. When she did-it meant she was infuriated beyond belief.
"Are you sure Avatar?" Lady Grey asked sharply, her voice strained.
"I'm positive." He affirmed, his gaze steely and unrelenting. He'd traveled the distance from the Fire Nation Capital to Safe Haven in the span of a few hours to deliver this message. It was correct. Katara wouldn't lie to him…he hoped…
"Toph where are you going?" Lady Grey asked noticing his former Master's pained grimace as she began exiting the room. She didn't even bother turning back to look at her, she just paused in the doorway, her entire posture rigid.
"Someone has to go tell Azula." She said wearily.
Oh right.
Aang paled.
How would Azula react to this news?
"Maybe you should go with her." Lady Grey told him, her tone apologetic. That was literally the last thing he wanted to do. However, he couldn't say no. Aang licked his suddenly dry lips and slowly followed Toph out of the room. He hadn't seen Azula in years, not since the war. He wondered what she looked like now-or if she had changed. Toph never spoke of her, and neither did Lady Grey so he didn't know what to expect as they came upon the door to Toph's quarters.
The blind earthbender grunted unhappily, before cracking the door open. "Azula." She called out, and Aang blinked as the blue light that had been illuminating the room suddenly flickered out of existence. He'd only seen it briefly, but it was enough to reassure him the princess' firebending was still intact.
Clearly Azula was here, he stared blindly into the darkness unable to see the princess or Toph anymore.
"What do you want?"
Aang hung awkwardly in the door way, his heart clambering against his chest as that same voice spoke in the same vindictive tone it had ten years ago. The memories surfacing due to the princess' overwhelming presence hardly constituted as pleasant.
"We need to talk princess." Toph's voice filtered through the air, and Aang could practically feel the tension riddling through her frame, just by how she spoke.
No one liked being the bearer of bad news.
At her ominous words the former princess laughed, in a way that conveyed very little amusement. "I've had my fill of you for the day. Get out." She said icily, and Aang suddenly found the floor the most interesting thing in the world as he waited for Toph to unleash hell on the Firebender.
Toph never took scathing remarks lightly.
By nature-the earthbender was resilient. She always stood her ground and returned hostility tenfold. People learned quickly to never cross her.
So when Toph did the opposite of what he was expecting, and stifled her growing frustration-he wasn't sure how to react. "Oh believe me, I would love to." Toph said, in a tone that suggested she was talking through grit teeth. "But I can't, because than no one could tell you what was going on with Ty Lee."
"Is your memory defective too? You already told me about the funeral." Azula said frostily.
"It's not about the fune-" Toph started to correct her, before she was rudely cut off again.
"Then what is it about?" Azula asked her voice tight and filled with exasperation. By this time her temper was hanging on by a dangerously thin thread.
"Well if you shut up for ten seconds I could tell you." Toph snarked back testily, and Aang heard the earthbender shuffling around in the darkness. "Look princess…We just found out that your brother is not burying Ty Lee…he's leaving her out for the elements to destroy and the crows to feed on." She said bluntly.
Aang almost groaned.
Toph needed a lesson in tact, and perhaps in sensitivity.
Azula didn't need to hear the truth quite like that.
And the grim silence that followed Toph's words wasn't comforting.
"Azula?" He asked the silence.
He heard a crash, followed by a large boom, and was temporarily blinded by a blue flash.
Alarmed he conjured a flame, letting the small fire hover above his open palm, and waited for the spots cleared from his vision. When he wasn't suffering from temporary blindness anymore he turned his attention back to the princess. Peering into the newly lighted room, his eyes adjusted to the gentle glow of the flame and he blinked at the scene in front of him.
Azula lay on the ground, her eyes burning with unshed tears. She was lying haphazardly on her side, her arm hugged to her chest as Toph hovered over her, pressing her into the ground. The earthbender had a firm hold on her so the Firebender couldn't escape. The princess glared fiercely up at her captor whose grip only tightened on her shoulders.
"Princess, I said it once, but I'll say it again-you're an idiot."
Azula didn't reply.
She looked to stricken.
Too angry.
Aang felt sympathy welling up inside his chest.
"You can't just fly into a rage anymore. You remember what Kei said about pushing yourself-do you want to be paralyzed for the rest of your life?" The earthbender glared stonily at the ground next to her, her milky grey eyes staring through the inert princess instead of at her.
Azula laughed bitterly, and Aang swore he saw a tear roll down her cheek.
It could have been a trick of the light, but-That wasn't what really what astounded him. What happened next would remain seared into his memory forever. Instead of badgering the broken woman at her feet, Toph sighed despairingly and gently drew the emotionally exhausted woman to her till Azula's head rested in her lap. Then despite all logic and reason she began softly stroking the princess' head. The princess opened her mouth to protest, to scream, to hurl every demeaning insult at her disposal at the earthbender, but the only thing that escaped her lips was a choked sob.
Aang gaped at both of them, unsure of what to make of the scene.
Toph-who refused to coddle even her closest of friends, was comforting a princess who was supposed to be incapable of feeling emotion?
Was he hallucinating?
And this is the chapter end...
Next chapter-I try and fix some things and make some things worse, but please give me some input on this chapter. How did you all feel about it? And Do you like the length?
The outline I plotted out makes the next few chapters this long if I don't find a way to shorten them. (Bleh ANOTHER 24 pages...)
Leave some love or hate-I dunno this chapter needs feedback. xD