*Chris POV*

I look at my best friend lead in the hospital bed. How could I have done this to someone so innocent? Taking my phone, I go into the hallway. Sat on the seat in front of me is a boy about my age, with shaggy blond hair, crystal blue eyes and long, slender legs, which are shown off by a pair of denim shorts. He looks vaguely familiar...

'Can I help you?' He asks me, obviously noticing me staring. He takes a sip of his milkshake. I hear footsteps behind me.

'Thank God' I think to myself.

'Hey Charlie, you really do like that milkshake! Is your mum any better?' Dan appears behind me

'Much better, thank you! She should be coming home next week. Hoe about your friend, Phil?' He smiles, revealing a mouth full of perfect, pearly white teeth.

'Actually, he's in there getting changed right now, and he's coming home. Didn't even break a bone, God only knows how!' Dan smiles back. Oh, that smile. Just that smile reminds me of how much I love him.

'Excuse me' I say, and rush off to the toilet. My eyes are already more than a little wet.

*Third person*

'What's wrong with him?' Charlie asked, concerned.

'I give exactly minus ten shits about what's wrong with him to be quite honest' As soon as those words left Dans lips, PJ exited Phils hospital room.

'Peej! Go find Chris! He's upset about something' Dan pointed down the corridor where Chris had hurried off not ten seconds ago.

'On it!' PJ ran down the corridor where Dan had pointed.

*Third person; Chris*

Chris dialled the number on his phone. It rang and rang and rang. No answer.

'Please leave your message after the tone' Chris sighed. Why won't she ever answer him?

'Hey Emma! So, I know we haven't spoken in a while, but I need you. I need to speak to you like we used to! I need you to be my best friend like you always were! Call me back, bye!

Emma is Chris' older sister. Honey hair, ocean eyes and a long slender figure were her most memorable features. She always has her head in a book. I was actually the one who taught Chris to read, since their mum is dyslexic and their dad ran away with a twenty year old model when Chris was one and Emma was seven. Ever since Chris was about six, himself and Emma had not only been siblings, but best friends. She taught him how to read and write before he went to school, she taught him how to draw, she introduced him to video games when he was eight, but most of all, she helped him come out about being gay when he was fourteen. But when Emma was twenty-two, her best friend, Jack Howard, introduced her to him other best friend, Dean Dobbs. After two years, Dean and Emma got married and had a little boy, Oliver. Chris babysat Oliver a couple of times, but apart from that, they both kind of drifted apart. The only times they really saw each other now was Christmas, birthdays and occasional sundays. It's really sad for Chris. She used to be his shoulder to cry on, his agony aunt when he needed advice, his google when he needed help his homework. Now she's just his sister.

Chris sighed, reminiscing about the memories he had with Emma. All the days playing Mario on the Nintendo 64, playing Space Invaders at the arcade, all the time they had spent laughing at what the other had said. That's all gone.

'Chris? Chris, are you in here?' PJ's voice echoed through the empty restroom.

'Yeah Peej, I'm in the middle cubicle!' Chris replied, followed by a sniff.

'Chris, come on out buddy! What's up?' Chris wipes his wet eyes and exits the cubicle.

'You know what, PJ, just stop pretending t be nice to me, we both know what you're really thinking. You're thinking what everyone else is thinking. You're thinking 'Ugh Chris, the abusive, ugly twat who murders his friends for pleasure'. Even my sister abandoned me! As soon as the anger management started, Emma fucked off!' His voice rose and tears fell freely from his hazel eyes. PJ pulled him in for a hug but Chris pulled away.

'Don't you dare touch me! Don't pretend you give a toss about me!' PJ's eyes drop to the floor.

'I just wanted to say that nobody should ever feel like they're not enough. It's not nice to feel unwanted because chances are someone wants you just the way you are. You just have to give it time.' This is just what Emma had told Chris when he was sixteen. PJ looked up from the floor and his green eyes met Chris' hazel ones. In that moment, Chris had gone from his vulnerable best friend to an attractive stranger in the restroom. And in this breif moment, all memory of Phil had been blocked from his mind. Then, he noticed Chris' face getting closer to his own...and his phone goes off, sound bouncing all around the mens room. He reaches his hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone. Dan. He always chooses the worst possible time to text!

[Dan]-1:32pm

Come on, peasant! You must've found him by now! Phil is ready to go. We're waiting!

PJ laughed. Dan did love calling people 'Peasant'! He looked up at Chris, who was looking more than a little dissapointed. He bit his lip.

'Phil is ready to go now, we'd better get back' Chris nodded and walked out of the restroom, saying nothing. PJ followed suit. They returned to Phils room, still staying silent.

'About bloody time! Where have you been?' Dan laughed.

"Oh, I got lost on my way to the toilet' Chris lied convincingly. Dan shrugged nonchalantly.

'Come oooon! I wanna go hoooome!' Phil whined like a four year old. All the boys exited the room, checked out at the front desk, and left the hospital.

'Air! I missed you!' Phil span around, giggling like a schoolgirl. They all got into their separate cars, Phil and Dan in Dans friends car, and PJ and Chris in PJ's car.

Dan and Phils drive home consisted of talking about any random crap they could think of. In a moment of silence, Dan took the opportunity to ask the question that has been bugging his mind for the past twenty-four hours.

'Why did you lie? You know, about Chris?' Phil looked up from his phone and sighed.

'Its easier to forget if I blame myself, and if nobody gets in trouble, I can pretend it never happened, whereas if Chris got arrested, of course I would want to visit him, and visiting him would be a constant reminder of the damage he caused me. Plus I'm not dead, so this can easily just be another story to tell my kids and grandkids when I'm old and grey!' Phil looked back down at his phone.

'Ok, that makes sense, but why, after all of that, would you still want to be his friend?' Dan kept his eyes on the road, his knuckles white where he was gripping the steering wheel so tight.

'Because I know what its like to be crazy in love with someone, and I know what it feels like when its over. He pushed me because he was angry, because I caused something that made him upset. It was because he was in love with you, and I guided you on your way to ending it. Have you ever been in love?' A couple of stray tears fell down the older boys face, but he quickly discarded them before the other saw.

'I thought I was' The brunette replied quietly. The drive continued in silence, neither boy really knowing what to say to the other. Dan pulled up in front of the apartment building, quickly followed by PJ's car.

'We thought we could join you for the evening?' PJ asked happily.

'I'd like that!' Phil replied, in his normal carefree, happy-go-lucky voice.

Dan walked over to Chris and pulled him into a tight embrace.

'I'm sorry I got so pissed at you, I guess I'm just too dumb to know what it feels like to be in your position. I've never been in love, so I've never had anyone tell me they don't love me, so I don't really know how it felt, if that makes sense?' Chris nodded. When Dan pulled away, Chris's face was a mixture of confusion and happiness.

'Look, I'm glad you understand know why I did it, but why do you need to apologise? I'm-' but Dan interrupted him before he could finish.

'Just accept my apology and get the fuck upstairs!' He smiled innocently at Chris and pushed his back lightly. He laughed and ran to join Phil and PJ at the door. Somehow, his feelings for Dan and kind of started to leave. I mean, he still loved him, but it just felt like he had began to come to terms with the fact that Dan doesn't love him. It's not often that feelings just disappear, so when Dan hugged him and he didn't have the uncontrollable urge to grab his face and kiss him, he was as surprised as anyone.

When the boys arrive at Phils flat, they all have to wait for Dan, who had manages to put Phils key right at the bottom of his bag. Then a letter fell out. Phil picked it up curiously.

'Hey Dan, what's this?' Dan snatched it away and put it in the side pocket of his bag quickly.

'It's nothing! Here are your keys' PJ looked at Dan, a flicker of worry filling his eyes. Dan flashed him an 'I'll tell you later' look and entered Phils now-open flat. They all piled onto the two sofas Phil had in his flat. They spent the evening chatting, drinking (except Dan. Someone had to be responsible!)

When it got to about 12pm, Dan stood up. Being the only sober one meant he had to take complete responsibilty of the othe three.

'Right, Phil needs rest, PJ and Chris, you're staying at my flat tonight, you're too drunk to drive, and there is no way in hell I'm letting you walk in that state' Dan ordered everyone around, playing daddy Howell. Everyone complied, too tires to argue.

The three boys entered Dans flat.

'PJ, you can go on the sofa, Chris, you're in the spare room. You know where everything is if you get thirsty or hungry. Remember that I've barely slept the last week, so if you wake me up before eleven tomorrow, I will kiss you. Got it? Both boys nodded and walked drunkenly to where they were sleeping. Dan tossed two pillows and a blanket at PJ and went to his own room. Without getting in to his pyjamas, he got into his bed. He fell as aleep as soon has his head hit the pillow.

AAAAAAGHHGHHH THIS TOOK ME FOOOREEEVERRRRR TO WRITE! I spent 2 days on the hard copy and then another 3 hours typing it out and editing it! But here you go, my longest chapter yet. EN-F*CKING-JOY! (Just kidding, I love every single person who reviews this story :D)

Thank you to KickTheEmma on twitter, she inspired the character of Emma (Chris' sister) and helped me with her characterization (if that's how you spell it) so thank you Emma, you're the best!

Happy late easter!

I'm hoping the next chapter will be done before my birthday, but that's on friday so I'm making no promises.

Review for infinite teddy bears wearing tutus!

Love you all so much! Keep reviewing! You are all really sweet!

Most of my thanks go to NeverlandNat and Lifelane who have reviewed almost every chapter so far, thank you both so much! But thank you to everyone as well, you are the reason I carry on! Seriously, I can't thank you all enough!

Stay awesome!

Georgie'xo