'This is so much better' was the only coherent thought in Draco's mind those first few minutes of kissing Granger. There were lots of fragments of thoughts like 'smooth' 'soft' 'lips' and 'warm' but the overwhelming feeling was that this was so much better. There were hands everywhere and two of them weren't his. In fact his weren't moving much at all. They were stuck to Granger's delectable arse. He'd tried moving them but they kept wandering back there so he'd given up the fight.

So whose hand's were moving? What was he backed up against? Some boisterous maneouvre knocked a precedent scroll onto his head which answered that question. This was a much more fun way to reorder the precedent scrolls. There was another thud and he turned his head to see that Cut-Out Cormac had thrown himself face forward onto the ground. Excellent, the little perv was getting a taste of his own medicine. Oh whatever that was Granger was doing to his earlobe could continue forever as far as he was concerned. And then it hit him, not like the scroll had but more like a voice from The Gods. It was Granger's hands and they were enthusiastically moving all over him! She'd just pinched him on the bum. This was so much better!

"Better than what?"

"Hmmm?" was Draco's cogent and witty response.

"You keep saying this is, ha, so much better" Granger explained as she kissed along his jaw "better than...mmm...what?"

'Anything' 'Everything' 'Life as I have known it until this point' were all answers that he managed to keep inside his mouth only because Granger didn't give it much of a chance to answer, she distracted his mouth with other activities. Thank Merlin for that. Apparently he'd been talking out loud without realising it again. This was bad. It was almost as bad as when he accidentally told Pansy he loved her the first time they kissed and that had been excruciating. He had to get some control back and quick before he bloody well proposed to Granger against his will. Her lips should be registered with the aurors as a dangerous magical weapon!

"Better than working on Susan's pay reform legislation" was the face-saving explanation he came up with as he pushed away from the scrolls and managed briefly to use his height, towering over her and giving himself some breathing space. Attack was the only form of defence he knew. He couldn't just turn into a gibbering teenager when she touched him. He had to make her gibber.

Oh no. Why had he stood up? Now she was on eye level with his tie and she had decided it was extraeneous to requirements. She was taking it off, slowly. He could feel his knees threatening to buckle. He was torn between wanting to allow himself to turn into a pile of mush and wanting to throw her up on her desk and lick her everywhere she would allow until she sighed his name. He'd call that Plan B. Apparently his body was going with turning to mush. 'Quickly, quickly make her do something else with her mouth before you make a complete tit of yourself' Draco mentally reprimanded himself.

"Don't you think this is better?" he asked in his best smug bastard tone while sliding his right hand up her side, grazing her breast and ending in her hair. He lowered his lips to her neck and kissed a teasing line up to the soft skin behind her ear. Success! He was rewarded with an audible groan and a cessation of her attempts to undress him.

"Filing. It's better than filing" Hermione said running one hand up his back and the other through his hair.

"I'll see your filing and I'll raise you, I'll raise you meetings" Draco responded intending to impress her with his use of Muggle expressions under duress. What actually seemed to impress her was his ability to pick her up simply by cupping her arse and standing up straight. Her squeak when he raised her feet from the ground was music to his ears. It only lasted a moment till he plonked her back down on her own desk but it was a Noise from the Dream and he'd achieved it in real life! He intended to get her horizontal under him if it was the last thing he did.

"This is better than 8am floo calls with the department heads" Hermione said as she impishly kicked off one shoe and ran her stockinged foot up the inside of his leg. This caused Draco to simply grab her shoulders and kiss her as hard as he could. They were back to the beginning again, this was how this whole much better portion of his life had started a few minutes ago and just as then he could feel himself surrendering to bliss. The urge to say Desperately Inappropriate Things bubbled up inside him again. She was so much better at this game than he was. She was a natural and all he wanted was to do was this for the rest of his life. He leaned forward slowly pushing her backwards onto her desk. With one arm behind her back and the other braced on the desk he whispered something close to the truth:

"Better than arguing."

Granger went completely stiff in his arms and struggled to get back upright.

"Draco! My work!" she protested pushing against his chest.

"Oh yes I forgot to sweep it dramatically onto the floor" said Draco making a move to do just that without letting her up completely.

"No! My work can't go on the floor" Hermione cried.

"I think if we stop to organise your scrolls the mood will be somewhat damaged Granger" Draco observed while trailing his fingers along her shoulder blade.

Hermione put her forehead to his and took a deep breath "I think this madness needs to be damaged don't you?"

'No!' 'Madness?' and 'Why would we stop the best thing that has ever happened to either of us?' were all things Draco could have said but he was too stunned by the thought that he was on his own in the bliss to say much of anything. Granger gently shuffled out from under him and off the desk. Draco let her. She hadn't felt it. That was why he was standing adrift in the middle of the floor and she was all the way over there fixing things on her desk. She hadn't felt it. He kept repeating it in his head because it was so incredible. A minute ago she'd been teasing his thigh with her foot for fuck's sake. Was he supposed to believe that she did that sort of thing willy nilly? He leaned back against the scrolls again and tried to get his body back to its normal state. That was where he was when he realised she'd never actually answered the question. Things had gone really well before she'd had the chance. Maybe she just thought that this wasn't appropriate office behaviour (and he agreed which just made it all the more hot as far as he was concerned). Perhaps she had felt it she just had workplace scruples.

"You never answered the question Granger"

"Technically you never asked a question Malfoy, you made a statement of intent" she said not meeting his gaze.

"Don't get all advocatey with me, you know what I meant."

"Advocatey? Is that a new word Malfoy? Should I alert the Wizarding Lexicography Department?"

"Why are you avoiding the answer and eye-contact Granger?"

Hermione sighed and looked him in the eye. "I'm trying to let you retract your statement. I understand what you are doing and let's just say I appreciate the gesture."

"The gesture? You'll have to explain Granger. I'm a bit slow at the moment what with having been soundly snogged by you only moments ago."

She winced. "You are trying to apologise. Consider it accepted. Let's drop this before it gets any more out of hand than it already has."

"Of the many things I want to do right now apologise isn't one of them. I have nothing to apologise for. This is called moving forwards Granger. Now are you accepting my invitation?"

"How on earth would a casual date between us resolve anything? It'll just make everything more messy. We have to work together and I'm not going on a pity-date with you to make you feel better for hurting me. It's a piss-poor idea Malfoy now drop it."

"Is that really who you think I am? Is that really what you think of yourself?"

She remained completely impassive giving him no clue to how he should proceed to get what he wanted. He'd just have to keep up this uncouth Gryffindor thing.

"I will not drop it. The invitation stands. I think you are going to take me up on it, sooner or later, of course I'd prefer sooner."

She looked alarmed at this statement of intention. "I expect you to behave professionally Malfoy."

Draco gave in to his desires and recreated one of his thought experiments. He crouched by the end of her desk, stroked her cheek and said gently: "isn't it a good job that I don't give a flying fuck about your expectations then Granger?" She looked at him with huge, shocked brown eyes and gulped again. Draco couldn't fully contain his genuine smile. He'd been right. The pure, noble, mighty Granger fancied him; profane, disgraced, dubious Draco Malfoy. She was going to fold like a cheap set of robes. This was going to be fun.

She alerted Ginny to the need for an emergency friend conference as soon as she managed to extricate herself from the office. She'd like to be able to say that she retreated gracefully while firmly restating her personal and professional boundaries to Malfoy. She'd like to be able to say that but she couldn't. She'd muttered something about needing the loo and run out of the office as if her arse were on fire. The same arse that Malfoy had been showing his profound appreciation for just moments earlier. Oh God! Oh Merlin! Oh bloody hell she'd pinched Malfoy's bum!

Luckily, and somewhat ironically, they had meetings with various department heads for most of the afternoon. Each time she caught Malfoy's eye across the conference table he'd either winked, raised an eyebrow and once passed her a note with only the word "worse" written on it. She'd spent most of the afternoon laughably flustered. She'd started the wrong presentation in one meeting informing a group of baffled Magical Transportation workers about changes in the legal status of certain migratory magical creatures outside Europe. When she finally found her feet and delivered the much more appropriate talk on the proposed licensing of portkeys she was fairly sure she'd left out vital points and all round lacked clarity because she was speaking at ninety miles an hour. This could not go on. She needed to talk to Ginny before her whirring brain dribbled out her ear.

Hermione flooed straight to Godric's Hollow from the main hall of the Ministry that evening. She had all but sprinted out of the last meeting grabbing her coat and bag from the office not listening as Cormac shouted angrily after her about her "betrayal". She felt like placing a small ad in the Daily Prophet asking if anyone had seen her dignity, she must had left it somewhere maybe someone would turn it in. Stumbling through the floo onto Ginny and Harry's hearthrug did little to fill her with a sense of confidence in her abilities. She blew her stray curls out of her eyes in frustration and called out to her friend.

"I'm in the kitchen pouring gins-and-tonic" came the heavenly reply "James, Albus and Harry are at The Burrow, we have an uninterrupted evening ahead of us so I thought we'd celebrate." When Gin discovered there was a Muggle drink that literally had her name on it she'd decided to embrace it wholeheartedly. Despite Hermione's many attempts to explain it was a Lady-Captain-of-the-Golf-Club drink Ginny's love for it did not falter. Now even Hermione was a fan. It had finally given her something in common with Great-aunt Marjorie at least.

"I'll have three" Hermione called.

"A three gin problem? Is it Malfoy?" said Ginny as she arrived into the living room with their drinks on a tray.

Hermione gaped and then managed to nod. "How did you know?" she whispered.

Guffaw was the only proper word to describe the noise Ginny made in response.

"He's the only one you care enough about to have a conference over, let alone three gins" Ginny stated matter-of-factly. "Did you do it on his desk?"

Hermione's G&T went down the wrong way. She spluttered and coughed so much that tears formed in her eyes. Ginny slapped her between the shoulder blades screeching "Oh bloody hell I was joking! Did you really?"

Coughing, Hermione shook her head violently. "We only kissed on the desk" she said when she was able to speak again, even though that wasn't the whole truth. She couldn't tell Ginny the rest until she'd had more than one drink. Although they had many years of shared friendship they'd never really talked about these things. Hermione's only serious relationship was with Ginny's brother and Ginny's was with Hermione's best friend. There would be a definite yuck factor in over-sharing on either side but Hermione felt that with Malfoy the same don't ask, don't tell policy might not apply. He wasn't related to either of them and he was undeniably attractive. She might have to use words to describe what had happened in the office earlier. There would be sentences with verbs in them...and subjects and objects. Oh God! She took a fortifying sip of her drink.

Her suspicions were confirmed when Ginny squealed and settled herself into a comfortable position with her feet crossed under her on the couch.

"Tell me everything" Gin commanded and Hermione looked at her friend's gleeful face and finally found the part of herself that was excited about this turn of events, she went so far as to allow herself a grin.

"So" said Ginny gesticulating with her glass after several gins-and-tonic and many descriptive sentences containing various parts of speech "a man you've been having filthy dreams about non-stop for weeks has asked you out followed by a sensational snogging session which used almost every flat surface in your shared office and your response is to turn him down flat and think there is a crisis. Are you sure you are as bright as you're given credit for? Why are you here? Why aren't you off shagging Malfoy?"

"Ginny!"

"What? It's a legitimate question! He does nothing for me beyond activating an urge to jinx him with a case of the tickles to see if he can come down off that high horse but he obviously floats your boat. So my question, and I think I speak for Malfoy too here, what's holding you back Hermione-of-my-heart?"

"But it's ridiculous!"

"Is it now?"

"He's Draco Malfoy!"

"Which seems to appeal to you."

"We work together" even on her fourth gin Hermione knew better than to baldly confirm her appreciation for his appeal to Ginny.

"All the more opportunity."

"All the more complicated you mean."

"Why does it have to be complicated?"

Hermione snorted tipsily. "I'm hardly the type of woman he'd take home to his mother!"

"What's that got to do with anything?"

Hermione looked at Ginny. She didn't appear to be joking. It looked like she really thought that was a legitimate question.

"He's not serious about me. He's just trying to sort out his fuck-up. He doesn't like it when we are fighting. He wants his ally back and he thinks this will work."

"Really? That's very common of course. The number of aticles of WitchWeekly devoted to what to do when a man snogs you silly for political reasons! It's a plague sweeping the nation!" Hermione laughed at Ginny's exaggeration but shook her head to show she wasn't convinced of her own folly. "Even if that were true may I point out you also hate it when you argue and according to both of you the snogging is a big improvement."

"But it could't go anywhere. It'd just end in a mess."

"Is that the problem? You want it to go somewhere?"

"No, of course not!"

Ginny leaned across the couch and took Hermione's G&T and settled it on the coffee table. She put a hand gently on her knee. "It's ok if you do, you know that don't you. In fact I'd be relieved."

"Relieved?"

"For the last few years I've been watching you date men who are boorish, boring and just rubbish matches for you. I can only imagine that if they can't make you laugh the sex must have been boring as hell. I know Harry and Ron have been winding you up about this and I have more to say on that subject too but this is me talking, your best female friend and I have to say I don't understand it any more than the boys do. Why are you settling for men who can only raise a polite smile? Don't you want something more? Malfoy said-"

"I don't want to hear it" Hermione interrupted. "I've heard more than enough of his opinions on my love-life thank you very much."

"Listen to me. His opinions on your love-life seem worth hearing at the moment as he's starring in it! I'm actually impressed that Malfoy had the balls to do it. He made a convincing argument that you were too intimidating for all but the most self-important prats to ask out because you're so gorgeous and intelligent and successful. So either he found some courage somewhere or he's now at peace with the fact that he too, is a self- important prat. Either way it's personal growth."

"He thinks I'm gorgeous?" Hermione asked in a small voice.

"And successful and intelligent and there was something about being kind to small animals and old people too. It almost sounded like he appreciated you. You have done worse. He's a good-looking arse but that's what you like, apparently." She ploughed on over Hermione's protestations. "Look at your record: it is. But point is it's not school anymore. It's not the war anymore. He's only an arse now. He's not the enemy. It's ok if you want it to be serious. Do you?"

"I don't know! Do I? I'm so confused it's ridiculous!"

"You're right, let's ignore the Boggart in the room. No more serious talk." Ginny paused to think for a moment and then leapt up to get a quill and parchment. "Let's make a list of places that two anonymous people, could be anyone, could snog in The Ministry. Number one - the parchment cupboard."

"Why would we need a list of snogging spots at work Ginny?" said Hermione in a warning tone.

"Because you are going to resolve this crisis the Hermione Granger way, with research!"

A/N You know all of my other work is distinctly PG with swearing. It's not just Hermione who gets the collywobbles at the thought of having to describe things with nouns. I hope this was ok and not vomit-inducing. I tried my best but even this sort of tame smut is difficult to write on the bus where people might read over your shoulder (yes I'm typing about you - Lady who read my work this morning saw the word Malfoy and snorted - may your umbrella turn inside out in a strong wind!)

Thanks to everyone who read, followed, favourited and reviewed the last chapter, I particularly want to thank those who reassured me that they had heard of Poohsticks (hurrah!) and those who have reviewed every chapter. I know every writer says this but they really are just fantastic to get. I love them all, even the ones that question my sanity. In an unprecedented move I've already started the next chapter and sort of know what I want to happen in it and everything, now to see if the characters will cooperate.